For Fanney

April 20, 2000

Dear Fanney,

I just downloaded your poem. Everytime I read it I feel your pain and

emptyness in your sister's passing. I did not have a sister that passed,

but a brother. We too were very close. (16 mos apart, I am the older

sister). It is so hard to understand how someone that was so alive and so

full of life can be gone from this one. When my brother passed away at the

young age of 33 from a massive heart attack I did not want to live

either.(He left behind 3 sons) I did not feel that I had a purpose here in

this world if I could not have my brother to laugh with and share with in

life's journey. He was in the Army for years and had only 5 years left

before he retired. He was running in his morning physical training and just

dropped. That was it! How final and how tragic. I think sometimes as

older siblings we somehow feel responsible for our little brothers and

sisters. We feel the need to protect them and somehow feel that their

passing means we have failed. I keep wishing to have just one more day with

him. I just want him to know how much I really really loved him and admired

him. He was truly the " Wind Beneath My Wings " , My Hero. Your poem brings

all of this to my mind. I wish I could be able to express even half of the

grief, that you did so well, in your poem.

Thank you for sharing your poem. I feel as if you wrote it for me too.

Love,

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