To Carol from Cheryl in CA

[Guest guest]

Hi Carol,

Thank you for asking about me. I have been with this group for quite some time now. Welcome, it is a friendly, informative group. I seems to be growing. My husband and I just had our 25th anniversary. He was bi-polar probably since a teen or even younger but didn't know it until we were married about 9 years. I knew he wasn't right but it wasn't until he had a psychotic break that he got a dx. and we lost everything and it all hit the fan so to speak.

I have had lupus since a teen but wasn't dxed until in my 40's. By then I had arthritis too. I have had TMJ dysfunction since my 30's. I got cancer about 7 yrs ago and had a brain hemorrhage and several seizures during very rough radiation and cemo treatment. That left me with fibromyalgia, and interstitial cystitis. I have cognitive dysfunction due to SLE, FM, and probably the hemorrhage. I also now have osteoporosis and degenerative disk disease. I take a lot of expensive meds and still have pain every day. I am depressed due to marital trouble, lupus, and fibro. I have lots of trouble sleeping. I am exhausted a good deal of the time.

When I just had lupus I used to work. When my lupus got worse I worked part-time. When I got the cancer and all the other stuff I had to go on permanent disability it has caused my husband much distress. We have struggled financially ever since. To make it worse this past 2 years we haven't had health insurance except my Medi=care. He is getting treated at the VA hosp. It took him 2 years to get in. He does a lot of screwed up things to our finances and makes life worse. He lies a lot and I have trouble dealing with bills that I don't even know I have! He recently had a psychotic episode that caused a family problem. My daughter and her husband and 2 kids live out of state. My husband did something crummy and they hate him now. My daughter calls and e-mails now but her husband hates us, thanks to my husband. He is on some new meds now and has started to hallucinate even though he says he feels more positive at work. He has been on about 18 or more jobs since we have been married.

I am disabled and unable to work. We had a big blow up 2 days ago over an unknown bill and I am a nervous wreck. I can't leave and take care of myself. I am extremely depressed now, sorry about that. I wish with all my heart that I could go back to work. My husband tries to be a good man. He is faithful and deeply loves me. We are Christians and he works hard at his jobs when he has one. When he looses a job he works day and night to get another. I know he would do anything for me if he could. He just doesn't know how to communicate very well. When he gets into trouble he tries to hide it.

How badly sick is your husband? How long have have you been married? Can he work? How are you dealing with it?

From: cjlw61 Sent: Tuesday, April 13, 2004 9:40 PMTo: LUPIES Subject: Re: welcome newbies to Cheryl

Hi Cheryl,My name is Carol and I have been a part of the group a little over a week now. I just read your post about yourself and also Your husband having bipolar. I am 42 and was just diagnosed with Lupus in December but not officially until about 2 weeks ago. I too have a husband who has bipolar. He is a good person also but we have had our struggles and most of our marriage has centered around taking care of him., I don't have really serious lupus symptoms right now mostly my feet and legs ache and I have had the Brain Fog and other light symptoms.

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