dining out

[Guest guest]

I've lost track of the current dining out discussion because I've

been SO busy that I'm at least a thousand messages behind. But it

caught my eye (I'm a frequent diner!) and I've read a few of the

messages. I notice a growing tone of discord.

Here's how I've been dealing with dining out lately.

There are precisely TWO restaurants in my general area that have

never glutened me. They are my " nearly last resort " restaurants,

my fall-backs, my " If we can't think of any other place " , my " I'm

too ravenous to be able to think straight " restaurants. I don't

go there ALL the time, although that would be easiest for me,

because I don't want to over-use them and make my family hate them.

One of the two is a chain restaurant, serving BBQ, and the other

is a one-of-a-kind serving Mexican. [To those in my area that want

to know: Smokey Bones in Warwick, and Rancho Chico in Plainville.]

In those two restaurants I can simply say " I'm a gluten-free diner " ,

get the special menu, order a simple meal, and be done with the

whole affair just like if I were any other easy-peasy diner.

The next tier of restaurants offers a larger variety of menu

choices, but takes a little more work for me to order safely.

This tier is mostly chain restaurants that have a known track

record of serving GF menu items. In these, I ask the hostess

to send the manager to the table to discuss food allergies before

I order. When we are all seated and have ordered beverages the

manager comes. I say " I'm a gluten free diner. Would you alert

the waitress and the kitchen of this? I'll need them to don

fresh gloves, use a clean pan and clean utensils. " The manager

says " Fine. No problem. " And I get a gluten-free meal.

By the way, this second tier includes Outback! Even though

they have a supposed-safe menu, I don't trust them to get it

right without managerial attention. Other restaurants in this

second tier are: Chili's, Uno's, 's.

The third tier of restaurants are the tiny one-of-a-kind mom-n-pop

places. I don't expect them to have a clue about gluten-free

dining. Here I expect to have to talk to the manager a few

minutes, perhaps use a Triumph Dining card, and ask a few

questions. The most recent time I did this, it was successful

navigation of a small local chain called Chelo's. The manager

had never heard of gluten before, was pleased to learn about it

from the Triumph Dining card, spent a few minutes to answer

questions about my potential choices, alerted the waitress and

the kitchen, and made life good.

There is no fourth tier, except those places where I expect to

only be there for the company and the Coca-Cola. I went to such

a place yesterday. I had the company of handsome strong young

men (professional movers) and I bought them lunch at a little

ice cream and burgers joint. They had burgers, fries, hot dogs,

seafood sandwich, etc. I had a Pepsi. They asked why I wasn't

eating, since they were surprised I wasn't ravenous too. I said

I'm allergic to wheat and it's not worth the effort to try to

get a wheat-free meal at this little place. A Pepsi would do.

I enjoyed their company while we ate. It was OK that all

I had was a Pepsi. Honest, it was. We all had some good laughs

while they told me that my move was easy like a day at the beach.

I got them telling me about the WORST kinds of moves, and the

bonehead maneuvers people do when moving. They seemed to enjoy

the opportunity to grumble about other people's moves. :-) I

enjoyed my Pepsi.

Granted, this fourth-tier choice of lunch isn't very healthy.

In particular, since I'm a T2, it was probably a pretty stupid

choice on my part. I paid the penalty later with migraine.

But sometimes... sometimes... it's OK. It's OK to go to a

restaurant for the company and not the food.

But only sometimes. Rarely. And I'm not likely to do it with

family. I already enjoy their company enough, thank you very much.

The fifth tier restaurant is for the ravenous family when I'm

not particularly hungry. That is ANY restaurant at all. And I

do mean ANY restaurant at all. The family goes in and eats. I

sit in the car and knit.

My advice to fellow celiacs: Always have a project in the car

for the days when fifth tier restaurants are the restaurant of

democratic choice.

I do most of my dining out at 2nd and 3rd tier places. I don't

get glutened often, but it does happen. If I thought that being

more aggressive about ordering and questioning would GUARANTEE

that I wouldn't get glutened, I might be more willing to

question and question and question. But I've found from sorry

experience that belaboring the aspects of celiac just upsets

people and probably gets me a boiled piece of chicken. Yuck.

Instead, I just state the issue plainly: " I'm a gluten-free diner. "

I say it like an every day kind of fact with which they might

be more familiar, like " I'm a peanut-free diner. "

I'm grateful that the issue isn't a life-or-death matter for me.

I won't go into shock and die at the table if I get glutened.

If that were the case for me, I'd be more aggressive. Or I'd

stay home and learn to cook.

Esther in RI