venting

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I hope everyone having birthdays lately have had good ones! We had my grandson's B-day party Saturday. He was 3. We had 20 something people there. Fortunately, it was a gorgeous day, sunny & temps in the 60's, so the kids (old & young) got to be outside!

That leads me to my problem. My mom was there also, of course. I love her dearly, but she always manages to get everyone riled up over something. Told my son-in-law that the lattice around their porch was "ugly". Had my daughter nearly in tears. She thinks she's helping by telling us what we're doing wrong if it's not what she thinks is the right way. She drives us all crazy!

How do you guys handle close family members who treat you as if this is all in your head? I've learned to say I'm just fine when she asks, because if I say how I really feel, she tells me I'm just not trying or I'm "giving in". She thinks since she's older, I can't be sicker than she is. I'm just lazy when I sleep & can't wake up or when my back, hips, knees or feet are so painful every step is hard. She was told many years ago that she tested "borderline" for lupus. So, to her, that means she knows I can't feel bad because it isn't bothering her. She has fibro & several other health problems & she "goes to work every day". It's not like I've always been this way. I've always been an active, outdoorsy type person. I was very involved in sports growing up & until I married. I've always worked right along side my husband doing a mans work with cattle. Coached the girls softball teams, got all 4 kids to all their various practices & games, school activities, etc. Kept up with an aviary full of birds, did ( & still do) educational programs for schools, nursing homes, civic groups, etc. It just makes me mad & hurt to be treated this way. She's even got our younger daughter believing her. Jess calls to ask about her daddy, but never asks how I feel & if I try to talk to her about anything pertaining to my health she changes the subject.

I'm sorry to ramble on so long. Guess I just needed to vent a little.

I saw my primary care doc today. She changed my Relafen & Flexaril to Robaxin & Feldine (sp). She's not much for giving out pain meds. Not narcotics anyway. I would love to have something to get rid of this headache I've had for weeks now. Not to mention all the other aches & pains!

again for rambling!

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[Guest guest]

Have a little cheese! People like that don't deserve to be worried over. Someday she will have to eat her words. I know my in-laws used to think I'm just lazy. Pat & I have been married 17 years and they finally started asking how I am doing after being down during one of my bad attacks. Some people just cant get it! I know my boss is like that, he never takes a minute off, He breezed thru the stomach flu that had several employees off for days at at time. Guess he/they think all symptoms have to be as mild as theirs. It's a shame we have to be the understanding ones, isn't it? Vent away, maybe it will help your headaches too! Hope your head feels better soon! Deb

Thank you for the cheese! I like a good cheddar!

Jace tells me the same thing, "it's not worth worrying about".

He is so good to me! He's been through so much himself, he knows what it feels like. He went 3 1/2 yrs without a diagnosis. Family & friends were doubting him. Made it rough.

My head does feel a little better....as long as I don't move! Then it feels like my brain (or where it's supposed to be) is on fire.

It does make me feel better to know others out there understand!

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