New to this group- some info about me

[Guest guest]

Hello Everyone,

I go by the name B. on Yahoo's groups. Some of you know me from

Happy Pelvis (I recognize some of the names here!). I thought I'd

introduce myself- I'm 27, live in Canada, and have suffered with 24/7

vulvar pain since February 2007. More specifically, I have

vestibulodynia and clitorodynia. I have tried many treatments

(including various drugs and PT), but haven't had much relief thus

far. I recently came to the conclusion that I may have a hormonal

imbalance of some sort, as I've suffered increasingly severe PMS/PMDD

for almost every month since February 2008- and I *never* had such a

problem before I developed vulvodynia. I'm very often depressed and

angry due to pain, but about ten to fourteen days before my period, I

go into this crazy nutzoid rage that scares the living daylights outta

my partner (he says it gets worse each cycle). I also get super-weepy

at this time. Plus, my pain usually shoots up at this time, as does

my vulvar dryness (which seems to affect me more often than not).

Despite all this, my gyn refuses to test my hormones because I'm " too

young " to have an imbalance. Total bs, IMO- these crazy symptoms are

*not* normal.

I am currently on a wait list for a pain clinic in Canada (the Wasser

Pain Clinic in Toronto, to be exact). It will likely take until 2010

to get in, so I'm thinking of going to see Dr. Marvel in Baltimore in

the meantime (I've heard many good things about him). Unfortunately,

there are no vulvar specialists where I live, so I have to travel

ridiculously long distances for treatment. Being Canadian, I do not

have U.S. health insurance, and must pay for everything out of my own

pocket. I've spent over 15k already, and the only reason I can afford

to spend more is because I sold my house last year! I'm very lucky to

have cash reserves, but because there is really no guarantee that any

treatment will work, I get all panicky that I will go broke before I

experience pain relief. But if I want to be well, it seems I have to

take financial risks (*sigh*).

Emotionally, my disease has tested me to the maximum. I am unable to

do many things because of pain. I cannot get married, hold down a

job, exercise, wear panties comfortably, or have sex because I hurt so

much. My gyn told me that I'd never be well, and I often wonder if

she's right, as nothing has helped me, and no good docs exist where I

live. In over 90% of the success stories I've seen, the individuals

telling them were lucky enough to live close to good medical care. I

don't, so it seems tnat statistically, my chance of recovery is next

to zero (I hope I'm wrong about this!).

Well, this is me in a nutshell. I apologize for all the negativity.

I really hope that I can ultimately beat this crap, and be a

fully-functioning human being again. If that ever happens, I will be

eternally grateful. I would give just about anything to be

vulvodynia-free- no joke. If anyone has any suggestions for me, feel

free to pass them on! And likewise, if I have any ideas that may help

anyone else here, I will let you know.

Looking forward to getting to know all of you guys,

B.