Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Margaret ... so glad you're back! I missed you. You are always johnny-on-the-spot with answers and advise and straightening us newbies out, in a very gentle way. Wouldn't it be nice if we all knew that we would go that peacefully? Just fall asleep.... We had to have our Great Dane put to sleep this week. She was 10 years old, which is old for a Dane. It was very sad and our little Dalmatian Mercy, who was never without Gracie, is still very very sad. If anyone thinks that dogs don't grieve, then you are welcomed to come here to your house in the country and see one little sad dog. We're really babying her and giving her treats and even gave her a bath and letting her come inside! But she still won't sleep in " their " bed. She slips beside it. Glad all's well with your mom too. Will you be going to visit her again soon? Does she have email? My mom lives 500 miles from me but I stay " tight " with her through emails. She's turning in the Online Bingo Queen! Suzanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 In a message dated 8/25/2003 3:49:10 PM Eastern Daylight Time, maillists@... writes: Tell her if she learns Windows and email, a younger guy (70 years old) might email her. *g* Rennie... I know a 75 year old Bingo Mama who would email him back! Suzanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 In a message dated 8/25/2003 4:15:15 PM Eastern Daylight Time, rachelv@... writes: As far as their cell phones, they are almost useless. My dad sometimes remembers to turn his on, but my mom NEVER uses hers unless it's an emergency. I keep telling her that I could get hold of her when she's not at home if she would turn it on, but she doesn't bother. It's not that they don't have enough minutes either...they just can't get used to it. I sometimes wonder what I ever did without one! My mom learned that with her cell phone long distance calls are FREE, and she's all about FREE, so she's a believer in cell phones now! Suzanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Actually, I've been back for a week, but didn't feel like talking, so just lurked. Thanks for thinking of me everyone. We actually had a good time with mom, after the funeral and everything was over with. We got her out doing some of the things that she hadn't been able to do while dad was doing so poorly. I don't remember what all I told you before I left so hurriedly, but dad died in his sleep, around 4:30 in the morning. Mom said she heard him breathing louder and then his breathing just stopped. She called my brother and sister-in-law, and Dawn. Dawn is a hospice nurse and happened to be on call that night anyway, so if mom had called the service she would have gotten Dawn, but it was better for Dawn to find out from mom rather than the service. Hospice came in immediately and took care of everything very quickly. Mom lives next door to a monastery. She decided she should call the nuns and let them know, as she knew they would be up and wondering about all of the commotion. A little bit later, three of nuns came over and gave their condolences, which mom was really impressed by. Anyway we are all glad that he went so peacefully. He had lived through all of the things that were planned for the summer. We had had the family reunion, then his older sister and her husband had been down to visit, then my brother's birthday and my mom's birthday (8/5). Then there just wasn't anything left to look forward to. It was amazing that he lived that long as early in June he was worried that he might not make it to the reunion. But he did great at the reunion and really pushed to be a part of everything. He just finally ran out of steam. All of your well wishes have really been appreciated. Thanks everyone for the condolence e-mails, etc. Now that I am home, I am sad and lonely and really sorry that I don't have as much family in this area. My son and his wife are here, which is why I live here, but they have their own lives and work and we really have to make an effort to get together. I am still doing a lot to get out with friends, etc., but working at home and living alone is more isolating right now than I had expected. So I may not be as active in answering questions for awhile, but I am here. Thanks for the thoughts and especially the prayers. Keep up the prayers for mom, I know she is much lonelier now that we have all gone home. Margaret Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Glad you are back Margaret. I sent a prayer your way.... Quixote Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 We are here for you Margaret. You are never truly alone. {{Hug}} You still have a lot of living to do, and your dad would want it that way. Rennie www.renesue.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 I'm glad you're back Margaret. Again, my condolences. Jan jantranscribes@... " Typing is my life. " " Whoever signs the paycheck makes the rules. " I'm back > Actually, I've been back for a week, but didn't feel like talking, so just lurked. Thanks for thinking of me everyone. We actually had a good time with mom, after the funeral and everything was over with. We got her out doing some of the things that she hadn't been able to do while dad was doing so poorly. I don't remember what all I told you before I left so hurriedly, but dad died in his sleep, around 4:30 in the morning. Mom said she heard him breathing louder and then his breathing just stopped. She called my brother and sister-in-law, and Dawn. Dawn is a hospice nurse and happened to be on call that night anyway, so if mom had called the service she would have gotten Dawn, but it was better for Dawn to find out from mom rather than the service. Hospice came in immediately and took care of everything very quickly. Mom lives next door to a monastery. She decided she should call the nuns and let them know, as she knew they would be up and wondering about all of the commotion. A little bit later, three of nuns came over and gave their condolences, which mom was really impressed by. > > Anyway we are all glad that he went so peacefully. He had lived through all of the things that were planned for the summer. We had had the family reunion, then his older sister and her husband had been down to visit, then my brother's birthday and my mom's birthday (8/5). Then there just wasn't anything left to look forward to. It was amazing that he lived that long as early in June he was worried that he might not make it to the reunion. But he did great at the reunion and really pushed to be a part of everything. He just finally ran out of steam. > > All of your well wishes have really been appreciated. Thanks everyone for the condolence e-mails, etc. Now that I am home, I am sad and lonely and really sorry that I don't have as much family in this area. My son and his wife are here, which is why I live here, but they have their own lives and work and we really have to make an effort to get together. I am still doing a lot to get out with friends, etc., but working at home and living alone is more isolating right now than I had expected. So I may not be as active in answering questions for awhile, but I am here. Thanks for the thoughts and especially the prayers. Keep up the prayers for mom, I know she is much lonelier now that we have all gone home. Margaret > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Suzanne, Mom doesn't have e-mail as she just doesn't understand anything electronic. She took a class once and actually did send out a few e-mails on dad's computer, but that was it. We even had call waiting taken off her phone, as she just doesn't understand how to use it. Mom went in recently to find out what is wrong with her memory and was found to have vascular dementia and was started on Aricept. She really does great and is very intelligent, just don't give her anything electronic. We have a story about her from years ago. She tried to fix her mixer, took out one screw and the whole thing literally fell apart in her lap. She hasn't been allowed to try to fix anything since then. Now on to the story of mom and dad's cat. Nabbit is almost 18 years old and has been with them for about 12 of those years. Nabbit took very good care of both of my parents. Every evening, when it was time for bed, he would lead them into the bedroom and then sit in the chair to supervise as dad changed clothes and then transferred into bed. After dad died and they were taking him out to the hearse on the gurney, Nabbit followed them all the way out to the drive. Mom had to pick him up and hold him to keep him from going with dad. Nabbit is having a very difficult time. The first night, he stayed by mom all night. After that, he would wait until she went to sleep and then he would roam around the house crying until one of us would call him. He would sleep with one of us until the wee hours of the night, but then would head back downstairs so that he was with mom before she got up in the morning. It will be very hard on mom when something finally happens to that cat and at almost 18 we wonder how much longer he will be around. Margaret >>> smattsonMT@... 08/25/03 02:55PM >>> Margaret ... so glad you're back! I missed you. You are always johnny-on-the-spot with answers and advise and straightening us newbies out, in a very gentle way. Wouldn't it be nice if we all knew that we would go that peacefully? Just fall asleep.... We had to have our Great Dane put to sleep this week. She was 10 years old, which is old for a Dane. It was very sad and our little Dalmatian Mercy, who was never without Gracie, is still very very sad. If anyone thinks that dogs don't grieve, then you are welcomed to come here to your house in the country and see one little sad dog. We're really babying her and giving her treats and even gave her a bath and letting her come inside! But she still won't sleep in " their " bed. She slips beside it. Glad all's well with your mom too. Will you be going to visit her again soon? Does she have email? My mom lives 500 miles from me but I stay " tight " with her through emails. She's turning in the Online Bingo Queen! Suzanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I put his mind to rest about that. All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. Rennie www.renesue.com NMTC List Wrangler http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NMTC Re: I'm back Suzanne, Mom doesn't have e-mail as she just doesn't understand anything electronic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 My mother is 80, very energetic, and bright as they come but she is totally intimidated by the computer and we wasted our money giving her one. I am very frustrated with her, as she is letting a machine get the best of her and she is way to bright for that. We have bought books, disks, etc. to help her and tried helping her ourselves, but she just does not want to do it. We have suggested classes and help from friends, but no go. She wants e-mail but will not learn how to do it. She wants to write stories, but will not learn the word processing program. She said how amazed she is how I have taught myself and made a business out of it, but when I pointed out to her that a lot of that came from her, she ignores me. I am glad to hear there are others out there more successul than I am at getting an older parent to take up something new. Re: I'm back > > > Suzanne, Mom doesn't have e-mail as she just doesn't understand anything electronic. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Rennie, How utterly adorable! vtmt > He > asked me if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how > slowly he typed. I put his mind to rest about that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 No one can convince me that animals don't grieve. When I was in high school, our old German Shepherd had to be put to sleep. Our younger dog, a lab, looked for her for days. It was kind of sad to see him sitting at the screen door, just waiting. He wouldn't even eat for a few days. When I went to college, the lab wouldn't eat and kept looking for me, but eventually he learned I would come home for visits and was better. My grandfather's dog was practically joined at the hip with him, and she died soon after he did. Anyway, Margaret, I'm glad you're back and please know that you're not alone here in cyberspace. We know it's a very difficult time for you. Pattie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Tell her if she learns Windows and email, a younger guy (70 years old) might email her. *g* Rennie www.renesue.com NMTC List Wrangler http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NMTC Re: I'm back > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I put his mind to rest about that. > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Rennie, My mom is 81. Wouldn't it be a kick if we could get all of our parents on e-mail and get them to know each other, LOL. I'm thinking maybe mom could use one of those e-mail machines, where all you can do with it is e-mail. Then again, she doesn't really like using an answering machine. My brother got mom into a two year contract with a cell phone, since the gas gauge doesn't work in her car and she has run out of gas a couple of times. Mom really wanted that cell phone. But now it sits in the house rather than ever being in the car. He even has it programmed so that all she has to do is say, " " and it will call him. But she just won't use it. Oh well, it would be neat though if we could get our parents to write to each other. Margaret >>> maillists@... 08/25/03 03:43PM >>> Tell her if she learns Windows and email, a younger guy (70 years old) might email her. *g* Rennie www.renesue.com NMTC List Wrangler http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NMTC Re: I'm back > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I put his mind to rest about that. > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 My dad (83) is still intimidated by the internet. He will go out, finally, occasionally. He was in the Marine Corps during WWII and loved to fly. He studied aeronautical engineering in college, but got a job as a mechanical engineer. One funny story that was way back in the 40s when he was in college he wrote a paper on space flight (generally speaking) and his professor made him do it over because " he had been watching too much Buck " (I hope you all know who that is). I digress, anyway, I had thought to get him interested in the computer thing he would become enthralled if we got him a flight simulator program. No, that didn't do it. What got him really going with it (just the computer, not the internet) was geneology. He has traced my mother's side way, way back and his side back to Italy (not too difficult as his father came over when he was 9). But " playing with dead people " as my mother puts it keeps him pretty busy. Whenever we go to a funeral for a family member, even remote, he presents the family with a copy of his geneology work and this always seems to be appreciated. Anyway, as far as electrical goes -- my mom does not want anything to do with computer-type things, and that includes DVD. We went shopping over the weekend (I should have been working) so she could listen to some of Andre Rieu's CDs and decide which one she wanted (they had 2 that I knew she would be interested in the songs on) (she has become enthralled with this musician, as have I). She discovered him during the recent begathon by the local PBS station. We have 2 in this area and she was able to watch his Live In Dublin twice as much. Anyway, we went to B & N and got a few CDs for her. She had seen Chicago with me and like it. A local grocery store was running a special on it (use your Mastercard and get $5 off) with a coupon that she claimed she had not gotten in her ads. We stopped at the store and I found her an ad with the coupon and she insisted on getting the VHS " because she knows how to use that " . Welcome back, Margaret. I continue to keep you and your family in my prayers. Gai Re: I'm back Suzanne, Mom doesn't have e-mail as she just doesn't understand anything electronic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Margaret, I know what you mean about the cat. All but one of the cats I have had in my life have lived for at least 13 years. The one we have now (Wile E.) appeared on our windowsill during a snowstorm some 15-1/2 years ago and I truly dread the day he will no longer be with us. At the time he appeared we had a 17-year-old cat (Birthday) that I was about ready to put down for various reasons and then he came to us and she became rejuvenated and lived another 4 years. I know that cats feel grief just as we do. When Birthday finally left us Wile E. has not meowed since that time. He also developed an eating disorder. Everytime we walk in the door (even if we have only been out to take the trash out, etc) he thinks he needs to eat and will go to his food dish and eat. So, they do experience grief and loss. I know Nabbit is just feeling the grief and pain as well and as much as everyone else. I will also send up a prayer for him as well. Again, I have you all in my thoughts and prayers. Gai Re: I'm back Suzanne, Mom doesn't have e-mail as she just doesn't understand anything electronic. She took a class once and actually did send out a few e-mails on dad's computer, but that was it. We even had call waiting taken off her phone, as she just doesn't understand how to use it. Mom went in recently to find out what is wrong with her memory and was found to have vascular dementia and was started on Aricept. She really does great and is very intelligent, just don't give her anything electronic. We have a story about her from years ago. She tried to fix her mixer, took out one screw and the whole thing literally fell apart in her lap. She hasn't been allowed to try to fix anything since then. Now on to the story of mom and dad's cat. Nabbit is almost 18 years old and has been with them for about 12 of those years. Nabbit took very good care of both of my parents. Every evening, when it was time for bed, he would lead them into the bedroom and then sit in the chair to supervise as dad changed clothes and then transferred into bed. After dad died and they were taking him out to the hearse on the gurney, Nabbit followed them all the way out to the drive. Mom had to pick him up and hold him to keep him from going with dad. Nabbit is having a very difficult time. The first night, he stayed by mom all night. After that, he would wait until she went to sleep and then he would roam around the house crying until one of us would call him. He would sleep with one of us until the wee hours of the night, but then would head back downstairs so that he was with mom before she got up in the morning. It will be very hard on mom when something finally happens to that cat and at almost 18 we wonder how much longer he will be around. Margaret >>> smattsonMT@... 08/25/03 02:55PM >>> Margaret ... so glad you're back! I missed you. You are always johnny-on-the-spot with answers and advise and straightening us newbies out, in a very gentle way. Wouldn't it be nice if we all knew that we would go that peacefully? Just fall asleep.... We had to have our Great Dane put to sleep this week. She was 10 years old, which is old for a Dane. It was very sad and our little Dalmatian Mercy, who was never without Gracie, is still very very sad. If anyone thinks that dogs don't grieve, then you are welcomed to come here to your house in the country and see one little sad dog. We're really babying her and giving her treats and even gave her a bath and letting her come inside! But she still won't sleep in " their " bed. She slips beside it. Glad all's well with your mom too. Will you be going to visit her again soon? Does she have email? My mom lives 500 miles from me but I stay " tight " with her through emails. She's turning in the Online Bingo Queen! Suzanne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 My dad is very up with all of the electronic stuff. He has had several computers in the last several years (he's an electrical engineer), but my mom is hopeless. She won't even go up the stairs to read e-mail that I send. She has my dad print it out and bring it to her. She had a computer once, but guess where it is now? It is sitting in my living room and my kids use it. As far as their cell phones, they are almost useless. My dad sometimes remembers to turn his on, but my mom NEVER uses hers unless it's an emergency. I keep telling her that I could get hold of her when she's not at home if she would turn it on, but she doesn't bother. It's not that they don't have enough minutes either...they just can't get used to it. I sometimes wonder what I ever did without one! Re: I'm back > > > > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a > computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video > Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I > think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet > yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his > lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me > if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I > put his mind to rest about that. > > > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 My dad has had a computer for years, probably even sooner than most. But then, he was an accountant, so he had it for all of the accounting software, etc. Even though mom took that class, she never did get the hang of e-mails either. Dad would print out anything we send so that she could then read it, just like your mom. Now, let me tell you a story about cell phones, or rather the lack thereof. One of the problems we have is that most of us live in different parts of the country, from me in NC to one sister and family in NM and a younger sister in California. Anyway, the day after dad died, my brother-in-law Jim was coming in from New Mexico early in the day and my younger sister that evening. We had an appointment at the funeral home in the afternoon so a very good family friend, Bill, offered to go to the airport, which is about 1-1/2 hours away. My brother-in-law missed his connection in Chicago and wasn't able to get the next plane for over 3 hours. Neither Jim nor Bill were carrying a cell phone. So Jim was calling from pay phones to let us know his plans. Bill didn't even bother checking in with his wife, he just kept wandering around the airport for hours until he finally found Jim. It was wild. They then called and asked when the sister from California was coming in, which wasn't for another two hours. So the two men went out to dinner and then picked up younger sister, who did have a cell phone so knew who to expect. Boy, having a cell phone sure would have made that easier. Margaret >>> rachelv@... 08/25/03 04:11PM >>> My dad is very up with all of the electronic stuff. He has had several computers in the last several years (he's an electrical engineer), but my mom is hopeless. She won't even go up the stairs to read e-mail that I send. She has my dad print it out and bring it to her. She had a computer once, but guess where it is now? It is sitting in my living room and my kids use it. As far as their cell phones, they are almost useless. My dad sometimes remembers to turn his on, but my mom NEVER uses hers unless it's an emergency. I keep telling her that I could get hold of her when she's not at home if she would turn it on, but she doesn't bother. It's not that they don't have enough minutes either...they just can't get used to it. I sometimes wonder what I ever did without one! Re: I'm back > > > > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a > computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video > Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I > think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet > yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his > lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me > if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I > put his mind to rest about that. > > > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Boy, I can relate to that! Re: I'm back > > > > > > > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a > > computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the > Video > > Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and > I > > think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the > Internet > > yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does > " his > > lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > > > > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked > me > > if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. > I > > put his mind to rest about that. > > > > > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 LOL! Why didn't I think of that! My sister and I think she needs a man in her life again. My father died 20 years ago. She has become very used to doing things her way. She does not have a lot of money, and we would love to see her find someone who would take her places. She loves to travel but cannot afford it (my father was ill and retired on disability). I will pass that on and see what she says! Re: I'm back > > > > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a > computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video > Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I > think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet > yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his > lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me > if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I > put his mind to rest about that. > > > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 25, 2003 Report Share Posted August 25, 2003 Peace Margaret. We missed you. I have to agree with everyone else. We are with you and you can talk with us anytime. Know you will continue to be in our prayers. If I remember correctly your brother lives near your mom? I am sure he would be there for her. Prayers for your mom too. Mom suffered another TIA today. Right in the middle of my finding the cause of an odor that was emanating from my kitchen sink...must have been a leak for 3 weeks with the amount of dirty water that accumulated. So with the plumber here and mom's problems I had my hands full. My client is off this week so I had planned to clean thoroughly this week Looks like the sink is happy about that. Good news is that the Alzheimer society has grants for $500. respite care. But it has to be used in 3 months. I have applied for it. The office of Aging said it doesn't go far since I have to use an accredited agency which charges a fortune. Well take it one step at a time. Aliceanne At 02:30 PM 8/25/2003 -0400, you wrote: >Actually, I've been back for a week, but didn't feel like talking, so just >lurked. Thanks for thinking of me everyone. We actually had a good time >with mom, after the funeral and everything was over with. We got her out >doing some of the things that she hadn't been able to do while dad was >doing so poorly. I don't remember what all I told you before I left so >hurriedly, but dad died in his sleep, around 4:30 in the morning. Mom >said she heard him breathing louder and then his breathing just >stopped. She called my brother and sister-in-law, and Dawn. Dawn is >a hospice nurse and happened to be on call that night anyway, so if mom >had called the service she would have gotten Dawn, but it was better for >Dawn to find out from mom rather than the service. Hospice came in >immediately and took care of everything very quickly. Mom lives next door >to a monastery. She decided she should call the nuns and let them know, >as she knew they would be up and wondering about all of the commotion. A >little bit later, three of nuns came over and gave their condolences, >which mom was really impressed by. > >Anyway we are all glad that he went so peacefully. He had lived through >all of the things that were planned for the summer. We had had the family >reunion, then his older sister and her husband had been down to visit, >then my brother's birthday and my mom's birthday (8/5). Then there just >wasn't anything left to look forward to. It was amazing that he lived >that long as early in June he was worried that he might not make it to the >reunion. But he did great at the reunion and really pushed to be a part >of everything. He just finally ran out of steam. > >All of your well wishes have really been appreciated. Thanks everyone for >the condolence e-mails, etc. Now that I am home, I am sad and lonely and >really sorry that I don't have as much family in this area. My son and >his wife are here, which is why I live here, but they have their own lives >and work and we really have to make an effort to get together. I am still >doing a lot to get out with friends, etc., but working at home and living >alone is more isolating right now than I had expected. So I may not be as >active in answering questions for awhile, but I am here. Thanks for the >thoughts and especially the prayers. Keep up the prayers for mom, I know >she is much lonelier now that we have all gone home. Margaret > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2003 Report Share Posted August 26, 2003 It's good to see you back, Margaret. My prayers are with you now more than ever. If you're unusually quiet for a while I'm sure we'll all understand, but if you're too quiet I'm also sure that someone from the list will be checking on you to make sure you're okay. Dawn C. §(ºoº)§ Ortho, IM - 2 years+ M-TEC > Actually, I've been back for a week, but didn't feel like talking, > so just lurked. Thanks for thinking of me everyone. We actually > had a good time with mom, after the funeral and everything was over > with. We got her out doing some of the things that she hadn't been > able to do while dad was doing so poorly. I don't remember what > all I told you before I left so hurriedly, but dad died in his > sleep, around 4:30 in the morning. Mom said she heard him > breathing louder and then his breathing just stopped. She called > my brother and sister-in-law, and Dawn. Dawn is a hospice > nurse and happened to be on call that night anyway, so if mom had > called the service she would have gotten Dawn, but it was better > for Dawn to find out from mom rather than the service. Hospice > came in immediately and took care of everything very quickly. Mom > lives next door to a monastery. She decided she should call the > nuns and let them know, as she knew they would be up and wondering > about all of the commotion. A little bit later, three of nuns came > over and gave their condolences, which mom was really impressed by. > > > Anyway we are all glad that he went so peacefully. He had lived > through all of the things that were planned for the summer. We had > had the family reunion, then his older sister and her husband had > been down to visit, then my brother's birthday and my mom's > birthday (8/5). Then there just wasn't anything left to look > forward to. It was amazing that he lived that long as early in > June he was worried that he might not make it to the reunion. But > he did great at the reunion and really pushed to be a part of > everything. He just finally ran out of steam. > > > All of your well wishes have really been appreciated. Thanks > everyone for the condolence e-mails, etc. Now that I am home, I am > sad and lonely and really sorry that I don't have as much family in > this area. My son and his wife are here, which is why I live here, > but they have their own lives and work and we really have to make > an effort to get together. I am still doing a lot to get out with > friends, etc., but working at home and living alone is more > isolating right now than I had expected. So I may not be as active > in answering questions for awhile, but I am here. Thanks for the > thoughts and especially the prayers. Keep up the prayers for mom, > I know she is much lonelier now that we have all gone home. > Margaret > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2003 Report Share Posted August 26, 2003 Same story with my mom and the cell phone. She kept saying things like, " If I had a cell phone... " so I got her one, and she never takes it with her. And she's only 65! Lynn Re: I'm back Rennie, My mom is 81. Wouldn't it be a kick if we could get all of our parents on e-mail and get them to know each other, LOL. I'm thinking maybe mom could use one of those e-mail machines, where all you can do with it is e-mail. Then again, she doesn't really like using an answering machine. My brother got mom into a two year contract with a cell phone, since the gas gauge doesn't work in her car and she has run out of gas a couple of times. Mom really wanted that cell phone. But now it sits in the house rather than ever being in the car. He even has it programmed so that all she has to do is say, " " and it will call him. But she just won't use it. Oh well, it would be neat though if we could get our parents to write to each other. Margaret >>> maillists@... 08/25/03 03:43PM >>> Tell her if she learns Windows and email, a younger guy (70 years old) might email her. *g* Rennie www.renesue.com NMTC List Wrangler http://groups.yahoo.com/group/NMTC Re: I'm back > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I put his mind to rest about that. > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2003 Report Share Posted August 26, 2003 Hey, my dad's an electrical engineer too, and I'm a Van. Is your dad Dutch, or is VanDemark your married name? Most of the Van Couvering and Van Koevering side of my family are either writers or something techie-oriented (but Mom still won't use the cell). Just wondering if it's a Dutch trait. Anybody in Zeeland, Michigan? That's where my family planted itself when they came across way back when, before Grandpa drove out West in his model A. Lynn Van Couvering Re: I'm back My dad is very up with all of the electronic stuff. He has had several computers in the last several years (he's an electrical engineer), but my mom is hopeless. She won't even go up the stairs to read e-mail that I send. She has my dad print it out and bring it to her. She had a computer once, but guess where it is now? It is sitting in my living room and my kids use it. As far as their cell phones, they are almost useless. My dad sometimes remembers to turn his on, but my mom NEVER uses hers unless it's an emergency. I keep telling her that I could get hold of her when she's not at home if she would turn it on, but she doesn't bother. It's not that they don't have enough minutes either...they just can't get used to it. I sometimes wonder what I ever did without one! Re: I'm back > > > > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my dad a > computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I bought him the Video > Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is bored, and I > think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on the Internet > yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. He does " his > lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old guy. > > > > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. He asked me > if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly he typed. I > put his mind to rest about that. > > > > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted August 26, 2003 Report Share Posted August 26, 2003 Hey Lynn, Not there anymore, but I grew up half an hour away in Grand Rapids and most of my family is still there. My step mom and her portion of the family are from Holland, MI. I spent a great deal of time when I was young at the beach in Holland right next to Zeeland. I am about 75% Dutch and 25% Swedish. All of my great grandparents but one were all from the Netherlands. My maiden name was DeWinter and my mom's was (don't laugh) Posthumous. Dawn C. §(ºoº)§ Ortho, IM - 2 years+ M-TEC On Tue, 26 Aug 2003 09:12:37 -0700, Lynn Van Couvering wrote: > Hey, my dad's an electrical engineer too, and I'm a Van. Is your > dad Dutch, or is VanDemark your married name? Most of the Van > Couvering and Van Koevering side of my family are either writers or > something techie-oriented (but Mom still won't use the cell). Just > wondering if it's a Dutch trait. Anybody in Zeeland, Michigan? > That's where my family planted itself when they came across way > back when, before Grandpa drove out West in his model A. > > Lynn Van Couvering > > > Re: > I'm back > > > My dad is very up with all of the electronic stuff. He has had > several computers in the last several years (he's an electrical > engineer), but my mom is hopeless. She won't even go up the stairs > to read e-mail that I send. She has my dad print it out and bring > it to her. She had a computer once, but guess where it is now? It > is sitting in my living room and my kids use it. > > As far as their cell phones, they are almost useless. My dad > sometimes remembers to turn his on, but my mom NEVER uses hers > unless it's an emergency. I keep telling her that I could get hold > of her when she's not at home if she would turn it on, but she > doesn't bother. It's not that they don't have enough minutes > either...they just can't get used to it. I sometimes wonder what I > ever did without one! > > > > > Re: I'm back >> >> >> > Speaking of older folks and the Internet, I recently gave my >> dad a computer. (He's 70 years old and lives with me.) I >> bought him the >> > Video >> Professor's CD tutorial for learning Windows XP. He often is >> bored, and >> > I >> think this will open up a whole new world for him. He isn't on >> the >> > Internet >> yet, but he will be as soon as he is comfortable with Windows. >> He does >> > " his >> lessons " every day, and is doing pretty well for a 70-year-old >> guy. > >> > He is a bit dyscoordinated with his hands, but he manages. >> He asked >> > me >> if, when he sent an email, the recipient could see how slowly >> he typed. >> > I >> put his mind to rest about that. >> > >> > All in all, a new adventure for both dad and daughter. ) >> >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.