Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. We just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at her on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going down that road... Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant is put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said not to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for the four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny haircut and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on before Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She is doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear the song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is so thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound to the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to hear Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with my faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these types of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my fears for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am going to bed, and giving God my worries. , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 years! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 wow and in aussie time that means tomorrow wow how time has flown and she has come along way all of the little ones have and all the fams to i think hugs ellen > > Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. > We > just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone > to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was > mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at > her > on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes > remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, > now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going > down that road... > > Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 > surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on > Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant > is > put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through > brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any > sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said > not > to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise > manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for > the > four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in > the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny > haircut > and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on > before > Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She > is > doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she > could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear > the > song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the > hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is > completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is > so > thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound > to > the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal > allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to > hear > Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and > gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with > my > faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I > understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey > has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am > terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard > to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been > shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these > types > of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to > continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She > truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my > fears > for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am > going to bed, and giving God my worries. > > , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big > brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 > years! > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 Beautiful, Chantelle. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 We'll be thinking of you tomorrow, & Kennedy Weir www.chargesyndrome.info > > Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. > We > just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone > to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was > mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at > her > on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes > remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, > now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going > down that road... > > Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 > surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on > Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant > is > put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through > brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any > sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said > not > to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise > manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for > the > four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in > the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny > haircut > and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on > before > Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She > is > doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she > could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear > the > song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the > hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is > completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is > so > thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound > to > the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal > allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to > hear > Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and > gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with > my > faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I > understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey > has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am > terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard > to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been > shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these > types > of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to > continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She > truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my > fears > for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am > going to bed, and giving God my worries. > > , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big > brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 > years! > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 Faith, no matter what we believe in is an important motivator in life. There are reasons why something is the way it is, though we dont always know why. Problems are never a way to punish us, sometimes they are a way of making us better and stronger, more compasionate and knowlegable people inside. We may worry, we may feel down on the world but we must always remember that faith is what brings us together and that god, no matter what we call him or her has not punnished us, only trusted us with an extra special gift. Maby Meag will hear, maby she wont, but always have faith and hope for the best cause thats what gets us through life I will keep hope that the surgery will be a success for Meag Love and hugs Chantelle > > Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. We > just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone > to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was > mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at > her > on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes > remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, > now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going > down that road... > > Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 > surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on > Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant > is > put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through > brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any > sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said > not > to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise > manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for > the > four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in > the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny > haircut > and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on > before > Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She > is > doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she > could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear > the > song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the > hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is > completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is > so > thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound > to > the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal > allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to > hear > Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and > gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with > my > faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I > understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey > has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am > terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard > to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been > shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these > types > of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to > continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She > truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my > fears > for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am > going to bed, and giving God my worries. > > , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big > brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 > years! > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 - Thanks for opening your heart to us. Each of these crossroads is so hard. Each time of hope puts us out there making us vulnerable again. I hope the surgery is a success in every way. Hugs and love, Michele W Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 , Thanks so much for your thoughts I know when I cant sleep I am on the internet checking things out or writing. Good luck with the implants and I hope all goes well. Crystal mom to (10), (3), and Eva (19 month old CHARGEr) wife to Dan in Illinois > > Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. We > just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone > to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was > mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at her > on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes > remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, > now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going > down that road... > > Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 > surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on > Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant is > put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through > brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any > sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said not > to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise > manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for the > four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in > the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny haircut > and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on before > Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She is > doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she > could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear the > song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the > hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is > completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is so > thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound to > the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal > allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to hear > Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and > gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with my > faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I > understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey > has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am > terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard > to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been > shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these types > of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to > continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She > truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my fears > for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am > going to bed, and giving God my worries. > > , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 years! > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 , I know how you're feeling. The implant surgery brings a lot of emotions with it--happiness, fear, hope. I hope that the surgery goes well, and I know God will give you the strength to handle whatever outcome it may bring. I'll be thinking of Meagan tomorrow. , mom to (4) http://kauffmanlak.blogspot.com/ --------------------------------- Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 Oh , that was such a lovely post...it really spoke to my heart because I have felt the very same way so many times. You will be in my thoughts tomorrow as Meagan endures yet another surgery. But for once, it actually is a proactive surgery for something possibly fun...that's different! Usually it is to save our kiddo's life, not to give them potential sound...pretty exciting. PLEASE, PLEASE keep us posted my friend. You are an amazing mom. So glad you and had some fun quality time alone with Meagan...she probably felt very special too. Much love to you and your wonderful family...Amy & Mighty Max and Melton wrote: Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. We just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at her on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going down that road... Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant is put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said not to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for the four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny haircut and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on before Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She is doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear the song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is so thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound to the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to hear Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with my faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these types of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my fears for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am going to bed, and giving God my worries. , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 years! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 good luck and hugs going your way! maria The time has come... Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. We just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at her on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going down that road... Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant is put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said not to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for the four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny haircut and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on before Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She is doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear the song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is so thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound to the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to hear Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with my faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these types of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my fears for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am going to bed, and giving God my worries. , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 years! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 , Good luck on this day... pam > > > > > Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. We > just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone > to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was > mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at her > on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes > remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, > now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going > down that road... > > Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 > surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on > Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant is > put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through > brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any > sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said not > to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise > manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for the > four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in > the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny haircut > and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on before > Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She is > doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she > could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear the > song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the > hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is > completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is so > thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound to > the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal > allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to hear > Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and > gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with my > faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I > understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey > has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am > terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard > to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been > shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these types > of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to > continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She > truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my fears > for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am > going to bed, and giving God my worries. > > , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big brother > 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 years! > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 14, 2006 Report Share Posted November 14, 2006 *hugs* Best of luck to your precious little girl! I do hope she gains some sound, as hearing is a lovely thing. I'm visually impaired (Not through charge) and had many eye surgeries, so can sort of relate. Mom thinks taking me to a chiropractor helped, but one never knows. LOL. I'm still legally blind, but Mom says I had nothing when I was really little. Again who knows? My husband's colaboma leaves us about even my too " good " eyes are about as " good " as his bad eye. LOL. Anyway, best of luck and best wishes to her. Every time I had a surgery, I got a new stuffed animal to take with me and a new gown and slippers. I really liked that. *smiles fondly* Sem Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted November 15, 2006 Report Share Posted November 15, 2006 - Thank you for sharing. We are quite a few steps behind you in this process and you expressed everything so beautifully. Your candor is helpful to those of us walking in your footsteps. Your family is in my prayers as you face tomorrow and the future. Janay Rasha's mom > > Hi everyone...I find myself writing you all at midnight. I can't sleep. We > just had the best night with Meagan, alone; the other two had already gone > to bed. Meagan was dancing, and scooting all over the place. She was > mimicking and putting on a show for and I. She had us laughing at her > on many occasions. We couldn't help but sit with tears in our eyes > remembering all she had been through and seeing how far she has come. So, > now I can't help but think of what her future may hold. It's scary going > down that road... > > Wednesday is fast approaching. We check her in at 6:00 a.m. for her 7:30 > surgery. Yes, it's here. Meagan is receiving her cochlear implant on > Wednesday morning. The surgery should be 1-2 hours long. Once the implant is > put into place, they will turn it on and see if Meagan responds (through > brain waves). So, fingers crossed, we will know if she is receiving any > sound. If for some reason there is no sound registered, the doctor said not > to be discouraged. It generally means there is too much background noise > manipulating any true reading. If this happens, we will have to wait for the > four week healing process to end before testing her again. She will be in > the hospital for one night and then sent home with yet another funny haircut > and new bump on her head. The implant should be officially turned on before > Christmas. Wouldn't that be a great gift? I want this so bad for her. She is > doing so well as it is; but if we give this child the gift of sound, she > could go so much farther. She could hear her twin sister. She could hear the > song I sing to calm her. This implant is not a guaranteed fix. That's the > hard part. Remembering not to get too excited. Meagan's inner ear is > completely normal, but the hearing nerve (although correct in length) is so > thin, that without the implant it cannot carry a typical signal of sound to > the brain. Our hopes are that the implant will generate a stronger signal > allowing the signal to make it to her brain resulting in the ability to hear > Even if it does help, it still may not be enough for Meagan to hear and > gain speech. We can only hope it is enough. This is where I struggle with my > faith. I want this so bad for her; I want God's will to be my will. I > understand that He has a journey for each of us to travel, but her journey > has been so rough. The mother in me wants it to be easier for her. I am > terrified the news will not be what we wanted and prayed for. It's so hard > to receive a blow like that. It shakes a persons faith. My faith has been > shaken more times than I can count. The emotions that come with these types > of blows are overwhelming and blur your thoughts. All I know to do is to > continue to pray and thank God for the daughter he has given to us. She > truly has taught us lessons that others sadly will never learn. But my fears > for her future still linger. Here I am raw, at 12:30 in the morning. I am > going to bed, and giving God my worries. > > , mommy to Meagan (CHaRgE) and 2 year old twins, and big brother 4 years, married to the best daddy in the world for 9 1/2 years! > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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