Re: Re: whining/Heath

[Guest guest]

Your wife is so fortunate to have you and probably, I am guessing, that you are

lucky to have her.

Sounds like you have come a long way since your first post, too.

You are a jewel. And I for one appreciate hearing from the spouse's side of

this cancer stuff.

Keep posting to us, Heath. We need your side, too.

Jan K

heath papp michigangrad96@...> wrote:

Oh and by-the-way, you're not whining. You're being human. Venting is

cathartic, keep up the good work!

Peace be with you,

Heath

marisa msteffers@...> wrote:

>

> Hi

> You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5

days

> before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a

> month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago

> and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got

> done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap.

>

> My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to

get

> over it.

>

> When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me

lazy

> cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his

> recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy.

>

> At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without

a

> good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she

would

> take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband

blew

> up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was

> not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that

> and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i

> was so sick.

>

> However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here,

etc,

> etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been

sick

> after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't

have

> a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I

filed

> for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10

> years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on

> medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had

> not

> quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now.

> Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we

were

> past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative

stuff

> now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I

> have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he

> is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again.

>

> I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country

and

> am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman)

my

> friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested

> in

> this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he

will

> never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort

> him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and

> tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make

me

> feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how

we

> will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford

it.

>

> Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't

> feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that

> he has said all this, it is worse

>

> By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't

> even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have

any

> kind of a marriage as far as I am concered.

>

> Sorry to whine

> Robin in Nebraska

>

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