Guest guest Posted February 3, 2007 Report Share Posted February 3, 2007 Hi You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get over it. When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i was so sick. However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had not quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested in this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that he has said all this, it is worse By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. Sorry to whine Robin in Nebraska Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 3, 2007 Report Share Posted February 3, 2007 Robin, I am sorry to hear your husband is acting like this. Would it do any good for the dr/onc to talk to him and explain that you ARE having side effects from the treatments or wouldn't that make a difference to him? There are ways to get help with meds. Talk to your patient advocate at the hospital. I am not on chemo but qualify to get one of my other meds for free. I will keep you in my prayers. Hugs nne Breast Cancer Patients Soul Mates for Life http://www.geocities.com/chucky5741/breastcancerpatients.html BreastCancerStories.com http://www.breastcancerstories.com/content/view/433/161/ Angel Feather Loomer www.angelfeatherloomer.blogspot.com Check out my other ornaments at www.geocities.com/chucky5741/bcornament.html Lots of info and gifts at: www.cancerclub.com whining Hi You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get over it. When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i was so sick. However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had not quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested in this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that he has said all this, it is worse By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. Sorry to whine Robin in Nebraska ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ No virus found in this incoming message. Checked by AVG Free Edition. Version: 7.1.411 / Virus Database: 268.17.21/665 - Release Date: 2/2/2007 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 3, 2007 Report Share Posted February 3, 2007 Wow, he sounds like he has some issues to deal with. Kicking you out of the bedroom should never happen. Have you asked him why he did that? My only advice is seek counseling. Jen > > Hi > You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days > before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a > month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago > and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got > done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. > > My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get > over it. > > When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy > cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his > recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. > > At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a > good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would > take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew > up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was > not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that > and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i > was so sick. > > However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, > etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick > after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have > a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed > for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 > years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on > medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had > not > quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. > Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were > past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff > now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I > have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he > is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. > > I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and > am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my > friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested > in > this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will > never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort > him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and > tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me > feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we > will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. > > Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't > feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that > he has said all this, it is worse > > By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't > even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any > kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. > > Sorry to whine > Robin in Nebraska > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 3, 2007 Report Share Posted February 3, 2007 > > Hi > You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days > before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a > month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago > and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got > done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. > > My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get > over it. > > When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy > cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his > recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. > > At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a > good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would > take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew > up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was > not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that > and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i > was so sick. > > However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, > etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick > after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have > a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed > for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 > years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on > medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had > not > quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. > Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were > past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff > now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I > have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he > is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. > > I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and > am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my > friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested > in > this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will > never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort > him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and > tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me > feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we > will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. > > Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't > feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that > he has said all this, it is worse > > By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't > even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any > kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. > > Sorry to whine > Robin in Nebraska > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 4, 2007 Report Share Posted February 4, 2007 Hi Robin, Be strong and do not allow anybody to stress you out. Everything has a solution. Trust in God and keep praying for help. I'll keep you in my prayers. I'm in my 3rd year with Arimidex and it does cause fatigue and aches. Learn to do your chores a little at a time. Have frequent breaks and you can get your work done. When your hubby is in a foul mood, let him vent because he probably does not know how to handle his frustration over your sickness. Pray in your heart for tolerance and understanding for both of you. Lol & God bless, Aurelia. whining Hi You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get over it. When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i was so sick. However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had not quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested in this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that he has said all this, it is worse By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. Sorry to whine Robin in Nebraska ________________________________________________________________________________\ ____ Any questions? Get answers on any topic at www.Answers.yahoo.com. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 4, 2007 Report Share Posted February 4, 2007 Robin, I am so sorry to hear about your struggles. I am trying to be as strong as I can for my wife, and I will not try and make any excuses, but men are weak in innumerable ways. Your husband's behavior is deplorable and maybe he's an ass, but I think he's just scared like we all are. That's not why I'm writing though. You should try to get some sleeping pills. My wife takes ambien xr, 12.5. If you don't have good health insurance for Rxs, try some benadryl. It'll make your mouth dry, but it makes you sleepy and is safe. We'll keep you in our thoughts and prayers. Namaste, Heath Aurelia Ang angaurelia@...> wrote: Hi Robin, Be strong and do not allow anybody to stress you out. Everything has a solution. Trust in God and keep praying for help. I'll keep you in my prayers. I'm in my 3rd year with Arimidex and it does cause fatigue and aches. Learn to do your chores a little at a time. Have frequent breaks and you can get your work done. When your hubby is in a foul mood, let him vent because he probably does not know how to handle his frustration over your sickness. Pray in your heart for tolerance and understanding for both of you. Lol & God bless, Aurelia. whining Hi You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get over it. When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i was so sick. However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had not quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested in this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that he has said all this, it is worse By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. Sorry to whine Robin in Nebraska __________________________________________________________ Any questions? Get answers on any topic at www.Answers.yahoo.com. Try it now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 4, 2007 Report Share Posted February 4, 2007 Oh and by-the-way, you're not whining. You're being human. Venting is cathartic, keep up the good work! Peace be with you, Heath marisa msteffers@...> wrote: > > Hi > You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days > before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a > month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago > and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got > done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. > > My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get > over it. > > When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy > cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his > recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. > > At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a > good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would > take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew > up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was > not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that > and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i > was so sick. > > However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, > etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick > after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have > a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed > for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 > years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on > medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had > not > quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. > Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were > past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff > now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I > have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he > is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. > > I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and > am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my > friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested > in > this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will > never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort > him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and > tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me > feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we > will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. > > Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't > feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that > he has said all this, it is worse > > By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't > even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any > kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. > > Sorry to whine > Robin in Nebraska > --------------------------------- Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 4, 2007 Report Share Posted February 4, 2007 -Robin, Don't worry you are not whining. That (I am assuming) is what this web site is for. You think your husband is bad? When I told mine that I needed extra help around the house when radiation was supposed to start( where was I supposed to find 2 hours a day!) he said F--- Y--. So I walked away thinking ok now is not the time to talk to him. Well he came after me and got in my face and said it again! Just what I needed at that time. I had horses,chickens, dogs,cats etc.,7 day a week job, 3 kids,10,12,15. I guess it was too much to ask. You're not the only one with no support but you know what, I relied on myself and found I got stronger because of it. You are your own best support! Hang in there it will get better. Marcia in Michigan at 5 degrees I guess I'm not going anywhere today! -- In breastcancer2 , heath papp wrote: > > Oh and by-the-way, you're not whining. You're being human. Venting is cathartic, keep up the good work! > Peace be with you, > Heath > > marisa wrote: > > > > > Hi > > You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 > days > > before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a > > month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago > > and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got > > done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. > > > > My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to > get > > over it. > > > > When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me > lazy > > cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his > > recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. > > > > At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without > a > > good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she > would > > take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband > blew > > up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was > > not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that > > and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i > > was so sick. > > > > However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, > etc, > > etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been > sick > > after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't > have > > a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I > filed > > for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 > > years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on > > medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had > > not > > quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. > > Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we > were > > past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative > stuff > > now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I > > have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he > > is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. > > > > I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country > and > > am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) > my > > friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested > > in > > this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he > will > > never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort > > him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and > > tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make > me > > feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how > we > > will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford > it. > > > > Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't > > feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that > > he has said all this, it is worse > > > > By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't > > even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have > any > > kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. > > > > Sorry to whine > > Robin in Nebraska > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 4, 2007 Report Share Posted February 4, 2007 Well, Robin, life does have it moments, doesn't it. This is the place to talk, whine, cry, and laugh. In my recent experience, and if you remember my posts on Arimidex, it will not make you feel any better. In fact, I am now on Celebrex for the bone pain and at times am having trouble getting around. Not much comfort from me there. Sorry about that. Maybe you could contact your Department on Aging to see about transportation and/or some support services. Also see if they have a case manager that can help you apply for assistance from the pharmaceutical company(ies). Many pharmaceutical companies have patient assistance programs and will give medication for free. Also, contact Medicaid and at 65 yrs old, Medicare. There pharmaceutical program will often help cover costs of meds. You can do this one more day. You can survive. Anyone who struggles and battles breast cancer is a strong person. And that means you. You will make it and we will help you. My prayers are with you. Jan K radairspike robinadair@...> wrote: Hi You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 days before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to get over it. When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me lazy cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without a good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she would take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband blew up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i was so sick. However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, etc, etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been sick after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't have a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I filed for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had not quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we were past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative stuff now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country and am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) my friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested in this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he will never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make me feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how we will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford it. Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that he has said all this, it is worse By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have any kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. Sorry to whine Robin in Nebraska Jan Koelsch --------------------------------- Don't get soaked. Take a quick peak at the forecast with theYahoo! Search weather shortcut. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 4, 2007 Report Share Posted February 4, 2007 Hey, Marcia in Michigan: I think if my husband would have said that to me, I would have turned around and ask him when and what time. LOL People who say things like that really don't understand what the F word really means. Jan K Marcia liberty24@...> wrote: -Robin, Don't worry you are not whining. That (I am assuming) is what this web site is for. You think your husband is bad? When I told mine that I needed extra help around the house when radiation was supposed to start( where was I supposed to find 2 hours a day!) he said F--- Y--. So I walked away thinking ok now is not the time to talk to him. Well he came after me and got in my face and said it again! Just what I needed at that time. I had horses,chickens, dogs,cats etc.,7 day a week job, 3 kids,10,12,15. I guess it was too much to ask. You're not the only one with no support but you know what, I relied on myself and found I got stronger because of it. You are your own best support! Hang in there it will get better. Marcia in Michigan at 5 degrees I guess I'm not going anywhere today! -- In breastcancer2 , heath papp wrote: > > Oh and by-the-way, you're not whining. You're being human. Venting is cathartic, keep up the good work! > Peace be with you, > Heath > > marisa wrote: > > > > > Hi > > You might remember that I got done with my radiation Jan 10th. 5 > days > > before that I got a cold or something. At any rate it has been a > > month and I still have it. I did go to my family doctor a week ago > > and got some very expensive, and potent anti biotics. I finally got > > done coughing up hunks :-( but still am so tired and feel like crap. > > > > My husband got the same thing but it only took a week for him to > get > > over it. > > > > When I first got done with radiation he made a point to call me > lazy > > cuz I was trying to rest on the week ends. He was sleeping in his > > recliner during the day, but somehow that is not lazy. > > > > At any rate I guess the point is , is there anyone on here without > a > > good support system besides me? I had one friend that said she > would > > take me to treatments and never did, and ignored me. My husband > blew > > up the first week after surgery and called me names and said he was > > not going to take me to treatments or do anything. He got over that > > and did take me when the weather was bad, and the last week when i > > was so sick. > > > > However now he is making noises how he does not want to be here, > etc, > > etc. It was just thrown out at me, but I know since I have been > sick > > after the radiation ,that is not going over very well. We don't > have > > a good marriage, and have been seperated 2 times, both times I > filed > > for divorce and he talked me out of it. The last time was over 10 > > years ago. I will be 65 in July, and he keeps waiting to get me on > > medicare, cuz he wants to retire. he will be 70 in April If he had > > not > > quit so many jobs when we were seperated he would be retired now. > > Long story I will not bore you with. The point is, I thougth we > were > > past all this crap, but I guess not. I don't want any negative > stuff > > now, so instead of asking him where he wants to be besides here I > > have not. I am scared to hear the answer. Now I am thinking that he > > is waiting for my birthday so he can leave again. > > > > I have one good friend that I can talk to, I live in the country > and > > am very isolated. AT any rate I consider all of you (great woman) > my > > friends. No, I am not going to leave, I have my whole life invested > > in > > this, so called marriage (46 years in March) But it seem that he > will > > never be happy. I am wondering what I should do, actually confort > > him, or just leave it alone. The problem is I still feel weak and > > tired and the Arimidex which he thinks I should take does not make > me > > feel any better. However when he retires in July I don't know how > we > > will afford it, And i know if he leave I certainly can not afford > it. > > > > Guess I am just reaching out, and wondering what to do so I don't > > feel so negative. I have so much trouble sleeping now, and now that > > he has said all this, it is worse > > > > By the way a year ago, he kicked me out of our bedroom so we don't > > even sleep in the same room. which makes it really hard to have > any > > kind of a marriage as far as I am concered. > > > > Sorry to whine > > Robin in Nebraska > > > > > > > > > --------------------------------- > Everyone is raving about the all-new Yahoo! Mail beta. > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.