Re:stopping tamoxifen/Anggy

[Guest guest]

Hi Anggy,

I don't even know how to begin to explain this decision...

Let's see... I was planning to have my first child last year, at least try to.

Then, Dec 2005 I found out I had cancer. My first thought was " I won't be able

to have a child " , and I was in shock. But then, I began to do research and see

my options. It helps that I have a molecular biology background so I knew

something to start with.

Giving up the idea of trying to have a child was unacceptable to me and I knew

all the effects the chemo would have on my ovaries. I tried my best to minimize

it. And I made the statistics work in my favor.

First no mastectomy; second, no ovary removal; third, ovarian protection;

fourth, freezing one ovary to implant later if necessary. In retrospective, I

should have tried a new protocol on in-vitro fertilization, but there was so

much I could handle at the time... As you can see, maternity is VERY important

to me. I know some people do not agree with me, but I don't feel good without my

fertility, it is almost like being a handicap. I also insisted with the onc to

keep the chemotherapy at the minimum to try to alleviate the toxicity to my

ovary. He did, I checked! LOL. I insisted on chemically shutting down my ovary

to try to protect it. Now I am waiting to see if my periods will come again.

Now, to tamoxifen... After research, I saw that 5 years of tamox would decrease,

by about 6 to 7% my chances of recurrences and 2 years would reduce in 3 to 4%

(give and take some errors here). I can live with 80% chance

survival/no-recurrence and have a shot of having a child instead of having 83%

of chance and not having a child and getting into premature menopause. For me, a

3% reduction is not worth giving up my dream of having a baby (and my quality of

life too).

My doctor also recommended ovarian ablation (chemically, not removing them), but

in the long term the chances were (because of my age) that I would be thrown

into permanent menopause. For some women, menopause is not a big deal, but for

me, at my age and so sudden, it is. No one has showed me any studies stating how

much we gain in reducing our chances of recurrences by ovarian ablation,

surgical or chemical (I am not considering here the BRCA mutation, of course).

So, this was also unacceptable, I would not, willingly, put myself into

premature menopause without hard proof that it was necessary. I accepted chemo

and tamox because there are studies showing the benefits, but not ovarian

removal. And, again, for me long term usage of tamox is not worth it.

Basically I made a plan. I will stick with tamox until I complete 2 years cancer

free (which will be in a year since I just turned 1 year survivor!!), then I

will try to conceive (either naturally or by in-vitro) and after I have my baby

I will go back to tamox.

Now, this is a very personal decision. Some people cannot live with a few

percentages but I can. What I could not live with was the idea of not trying to

fulfill my lifetime dream. I waited too long, and I won't give up now. I might

change in the near future, but that's the way I feel now. Also, all I did may

come to now good and I will never bear a child, but at least I will know I

tried.

I hope I didn't make you even more confused! Count on me for any questions you

might have.

If you are unsure about this surgery, ask you doctor exactly why it is necessary

and the numbers and research to corroborate his opinion. Then make a decision

based on what you can live with.

Hugs

Re: Re: New survey: Who is triple negative?

: why you don't going tot ake the 5 years tamoxifen?, i am going to talk

with my oncologist tomorrow, i want him to reffer me to a gynecologist

oncologist to tell me all my options and make a best decision, eitherway he want

to remove my ovaries when i finish the herceptin and i don't sure what else.

Hugs, Anggy.

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