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Chrystal.

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Oh Chrystal-

You are so incredibly welcome....you bless and humble me deeply by voicing your

thanks to me...I am grateful to you for reminding me the grace of the

connections between us. I am immeasurably grateful to have been able to be one

of the conduits for light in this...as this list is for me, and I presume for us

all.

lie Parrish posted the concept " Chronic Sorrow " in response to pain Belinda

was expressing. lie mentioned she is considering writing her doctorate on

the subject. I felt the term resonate deeply with me. When I Googled it, I

found the article " On Chronic Sorrow " from the Hydrocephalus Association

Newsletter, Spring 1998. This is a gift that connects us all. If not for

Belinda's bravery in posting, and lie's emotional prescience to respond, I

would never have looked, found and posted the article, an article which

resonated deeply with me as well.

Chrystal - not for a moment in reading your post did I ever feel to judge you -

I only felt to admire your courage, your magnificence, your beauty. Your phrase

" I was attempting to feel pain " brought me back to the moments in my life where

that phrase fits me perfectly.....

I honor and admire you for your honesty and generosity in sharing these moments

with us. Your post has made me more fully human, more fully alive and more

deeply grateful for the beauty that is inherent in all parts of life - not the

least of which are the most painful moments.....the moments when we stand on the

edge and realize that only a deep trust can keep us whole as we ask our most

unanswerable questions. A trust that has shown me that the question is sometimes

the answer. The plaintive " but, I don't know! " which demands knowing becomes

the calm, accepting and serene " I don't know, " - open to the question, open to

the silence afterwards and open to the fullness of the presence and the present,

no matter what it looks like.

with so much love and a deep hug-

yuka

Chrystine has several major surgeries soon. and the

depression...

When I got home that evening, I opened my emails and found Yuka's post on

Chronic Sorrow, and I believe it saved my life. I began taking my medication

again. I wanted to thank all of you for being out there somewhere and listening

to me come in and out of this group. I hope that if I am judged for my recent

behaviors, that you will find it in your hearts to forgive me. And, I would like

to personally thank you Yuka for that post. On that evening, that email may have

meant everything.

chrystal

.

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Yuka,

Have you read the book about Chronic Sorrow? I can¹t, at them moment,

remember the author, but it is a profound and moving book.

pam

>

>

>

>

> Oh Chrystal-

>

> You are so incredibly welcome....you bless and humble me deeply by voicing

> your thanks to me...I am grateful to you for reminding me the grace of the

> connections between us. I am immeasurably grateful to have been able to be one

> of the conduits for light in this...as this list is for me, and I presume for

> us all.

>

> lie Parrish posted the concept " Chronic Sorrow " in response to pain

> Belinda was expressing. lie mentioned she is considering writing her

> doctorate on the subject. I felt the term resonate deeply with me. When I

> Googled it, I found the article " On Chronic Sorrow " from the Hydrocephalus

> Association Newsletter, Spring 1998. This is a gift that connects us all. If

> not for Belinda's bravery in posting, and lie's emotional prescience to

> respond, I would never have looked, found and posted the article, an article

> which resonated deeply with me as well.

>

> Chrystal - not for a moment in reading your post did I ever feel to judge you

> - I only felt to admire your courage, your magnificence, your beauty. Your

> phrase " I was attempting to feel pain " brought me back to the moments in my

> life where that phrase fits me perfectly.....

>

> I honor and admire you for your honesty and generosity in sharing these

> moments with us. Your post has made me more fully human, more fully alive and

> more deeply grateful for the beauty that is inherent in all parts of life -

> not the least of which are the most painful moments.....the moments when we

> stand on the edge and realize that only a deep trust can keep us whole as we

> ask our most unanswerable questions. A trust that has shown me that the

> question is sometimes the answer. The plaintive " but, I don't know! " which

> demands knowing becomes the calm, accepting and serene " I don't know, " - open

> to the question, open to the silence afterwards and open to the fullness of

> the presence and the present, no matter what it looks like.

>

> with so much love and a deep hug-

>

> yuka

>

> Chrystine has several major surgeries soon. and the

> depression...

>

> When I got home that evening, I opened my emails and found Yuka's post on

> Chronic Sorrow, and I believe it saved my life. I began taking my medication

> again. I wanted to thank all of you for being out there somewhere and

> listening to me come in and out of this group. I hope that if I am judged for

> my recent behaviors, that you will find it in your hearts to forgive me. And,

> I would like to personally thank you Yuka for that post. On that evening, that

> email may have meant everything.

> chrystal

>

> .

>

>

>

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