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I think everyone should be encouraged to have goals and dreams and never give them up. Sometimes you have to compromise but never give up lofty goals and dreams. Best, Bubbe Gittel************************************** Check out free AOL at http://free.aol.com/thenewaol/index.adp. Most comprehensive set of free safety and security tools, millions of free high-quality videos from across the web, free AOL Mail and much more.

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Hi, Judy. Interesting post. And I believe it, too. Being positive in thought helps set attainable goals, too; I think one of the reasons we don't achieve some goals is that we set ourselves up to fail or expect to go from 0 to 60 in 5 seconds. Step by step. And a hearty dose of "Yes, I can!"

Maureen Pratt

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I was just reading in Scientific American Mind magazine last night that goals can actually be detrimental to our health – there’s a new one!

It did say that when we set goals and don’t achieve them it can lower our self esteem, i.e. Lose weight, get a better job, etc.

I think there may be some truth to that – many of us here do seem to be setting unattainable goals, at least for now :(

As far as dreams — now those I LOVE!

Sue :)

I think everyone should be encouraged to have goals and dreams and never give them up. Sometimes you have to compromise but never give up lofty goals and dreams. Best, Bubbe Gittel

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I hear that! I've set many weight loss goals in the past, and I often reached them, but could not maintain them in the long term. That was definitely detrimental to my self-esteem. I heard a new way of looking at this lately, and it's been working for me somewhat, no only for weight, but for many other things. Instead of just setting a goal and moving blindly toward it, you approach it in a different way. The philosophy is this: you decide what it is you want, and then you act as if you already have it. Simple, but effective.

For example, instead of setting a goal to weight a certain amount and then dieting and exercising to get there, you would say that you want to be thin and then begin to 'act as if' you already are. What this does is give you confidence way ahead of time, and also takes away the notion that there will ever be an end. If I want to be thin, and I 'act as if' I already am, then I'll eat and move like a thin person and at some point, I'll be there. But because I'm not working toward a goal, I won't start thinking about all the things that I can do once I get there.

I was getting so tired of making all of the decisions in the family and really feeling that it was a burden to be the only one reponsible for the outcome. As it turns out, all I had to do was stop. I decided that I wanted a decision making partner, acted 'as if' I had one, and then poof, he appeared. Who knew? LOL. Try it on something. Nothing to lose.

I hope I explained that right. It's one of the suggestions from the teachers of "The Secret"... Judy

It did say that when we set goals and don’t achieve them it can lower our self esteem, i.e. Lose weight, get a better job, etc.

Food fight? Enjoy some healthy debatein the Yahoo! Answers Food Drink Q&A.

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Man am I gonna try and put this one to practice LOL! I know the “fake it til you make it” philosophy very well also from Al Anon, so this method should be right up my alley.

I too am tired of being the ‘go to guy” for EVERYTHING ... It is time to just...stop.

Thanks :)

Sue

I was getting so tired of making all of the decisions in the family and really feeling that it was a burden to be the only one reponsible for the outcome. As it turns out, all I had to do was stop. I decided that I wanted a decision making partner, acted 'as if' I had one, and then poof, he appeared. Who knew? LOL. Try it on something. Nothing to lose.

I hope I explained that right. It's one of the suggestions from the teachers of " The Secret " ... Judy

It did say that when we set goals and don’t achieve them it can lower our self esteem, i.e. Lose weight, get a better job, etc.

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This is real wisdom!

--- Judy P ygroupsjp@...> wrote:

> I hear that! I've set many weight loss goals in the

> past, and I often reached them, but could not

> maintain them in the long term. That was definitely

> detrimental to my self-esteem. I heard a new way of

> looking at this lately, and it's been working for me

> somewhat, no only for weight, but for many other

> things. Instead of just setting a goal and moving

> blindly toward it, you approach it in a different

> way. The philosophy is this: you decide what it is

> you want, and then you act as if you already have

> it. Simple, but effective.

>

> For example, instead of setting a goal to weight a

> certain amount and then dieting and exercising to

> get there, you would say that you want to be thin

> and then begin to 'act as if' you already are. What

> this does is give you confidence way ahead of time,

> and also takes away the notion that there will ever

> be an end. If I want to be thin, and I 'act as if'

> I already am, then I'll eat and move like a thin

> person and at some point, I'll be there. But

> because I'm not working toward a goal, I won't start

> thinking about all the things that I can do once I

> get there.

>

> I was getting so tired of making all of the

> decisions in the family and really feeling that it

> was a burden to be the only one reponsible for the

> outcome. As it turns out, all I had to do was stop.

> I decided that I wanted a decision making partner,

> acted 'as if' I had one, and then poof, he appeared.

> Who knew? LOL. Try it on something. Nothing to

> lose.

>

> I hope I explained that right. It's one of the

> suggestions from the teachers of " The Secret " ...

> Judy

>

> ---------------------------------

>

> It did say that when we set goals and don’t achieve

> them it can lower our self esteem, i.e. Lose weight,

> get a better job, etc.

>

>

>

>

> ---------------------------------

> Food fight? Enjoy some healthy debate

> in the Yahoo! Answers Food & Drink Q&A.

________________________________________________________________________________\

____

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Have a HUGE year through Yahoo! Small Business.

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