Re: Jen's little life!

[Guest guest]

Jen,

I read your post with a big smile and tons of big wet tears streaming down my

face. You sound just beautiful. I am so glad for you. Have a wonderful new

year.

Resa

[Guest guest]

Jen,

Your story was inspiring. I could sure feel your excitement. I just want to

say congratulations on your success. Enjoy life and go to your destiny.

Hugs,

pre-op Dr Welker

260 lbs bmi 43.3

Jen's little life!

Hi Everyone!!

It's me, Jen, and I'm here to wish everyone a happy new year.

This year rocked. `nuff said.

I started this year thinking that this surgery would never happen.

It did. I was switched on 6/27/00. I had a great many

complications, but I'm here to say that every single thing I went

thru was totally worth it. I'd do it again in a heartbeat.

Here's the stats:

PreOp:

Weight: 342

BMI: 56.9

Height: 5'5 "

Pants: 26/28

Top: 4x

Shoe Size: 10 wide

PostOp: Six months, 5 days!!!

Weight: 250

Height: 5'6.5 "

BMI: 40.5 (Still MO, but what the heck!!)

Pants: 20/22

Top: 18/20

Shoe Size: 8.5/9 Regular!!

This weekend was probably the best in my life. I had my company

christmas party ( yeah, it was late!!) and I wore this dress I'd had

for probably 10 years. One that had gone out of styla and come back

in! No really!! I got hit on for the first time in ages.probably

cause I wasn't giving off the get the hell away from me vibes, and

now I have a date for next weekend. And get this. He's totally

normal!! No more losers for me, no way!! I realized for the first

time this weekend that I kept going for those " down and out " guys

that need to be taken care of because I thought that's all that would

want me. I'm so over that!! I realized that I'm not the person I

thought I was, under all that fat! I guess I also held on to that

notion, because I was certain that this surgery wouldn't work for

me. WHY? Well, mostly because I was so incredibly sick for the

first 4 months, and only lost 55 pounds while not eating and barfing

up whatever I did. Then there was that hairloss thing. I was

certain that I'd end up bigger than before, bald and with this big

ol' nasty scar (remember, I was " opened up " when a pocket of fluid

showed up behind my incision. I had to have it packed for almost 2

months!!) OH THE HORROR. Check this out. I've been wearing my 26's

STILL!! All baggy and saggy in the butt, cause I was certain that

nothing would fit. (Yes, I am back on my antidepressants, thanks!)

So back to the story, I went to Lane on Saturday, to return

something HORRIBLE I got for christmas, and I decided I wanted a new

bra. I had always wanted that " Jungle love " one they had, but they

didn't have a size to fit me. Well, I tried on a 44DDD Noooope. I

tried a 42DDD nooope. Then I got crazy and went for the killer red

one that they only had a 40 DD in. Guess what? IT FIT! I did the

happy dance there in the dressing room. I tried all the bras on!! I

ended up with 5 new ones! Red , blue, black, green, bronze!! For

the first time (since it mattered) I have all pretty bras!! I want

to go up to everyone I see and lift up my top, and say " HEY!! LOOK

AT MY BRA!! "

Oh my god, and that's not all. My mom got me this outfit for

christmas: Black polyester flare pants, a black tank and a sheer

blue paisley top, with some great big old clunky platforms. When I

opened it I was all like. Oh my god, I'll never wear this in a

million years. I was planning on taking that back too. My friend who

went with me on the bra mission convinced me to try it on. After

about an hour, I finally relented. I tried it on.

I walked into the bathroom.. I looked in the mirror.

I wasn't there.

I mean there was some chick there, in my mirror looking at me, but

hey, that couldn't have been me. So I went out into the livingroom

where my friend, my roomie and her boyfriend were. I walked in and.

total silence. I freakeed out. I mean, they must have been

speechless seeing the huge woman in the funny pants walking into the

room, Right?

So I panic. " what?? What's the matter?? Why are you looking at me "

the queen of paranoia yells. Then they say this:

Josh: " daaaamn "

: " You're a hottie! "

Jack: " You go out like that tomorrow night and you'll have to beat

them off with a stick! "

Me.

They were talking to me, and they didn't seem like they were

teasing.

They meant it. (And they were right!!)

I still am in shock!

So this morning, I did the unthinkable. I went thru my closet and

drawers and my whole house and piled up all the clothes that are

bigger than a 22, that I never liked, but were the only thing I could

find that fit, the " old lady " clothes, the entire bunch that I was

saving for " when the surgery didn't work " .

It's working. And I'm movin on.

I still can't believe it. Seeing pictures of Carnie still make me

cry. I still feel like that person in my " before pictures " but that

feeling is starting to fade. Soon it will be gone, and I'll just be

able to say

" thank you " when I'm complemented instead of getting all flustered

and acting like an ass.

I know I haven't been active in the group for a very long time, and I

think it was because I had so many problems and was so depressed that

I couldn't share in other's successes and happiness, so I felt that I

shouldn't be here. I'm sorry about that.

I think of you guys often: Randy, Amber, Kim, Tammy, Heidi, Kris,

Duffy, Neener, Kat, Mel, , , I know I'm forgetting

someone, but I just want you to know that you all helped me so much

and I wouldn't have made it this far without all of you. I was ready

to just give it up so many times. You all kept me going, and I thank

you so much for that.

Yeek. Now I'm being a sniveling baby. I just can't believe how much

my life has changed. And I wanted to share this with you all..

Thanks

Jen

[Guest guest]

Jen, congratulations!!!!!!!!! just reading your post makes me want to have this surgery more than anything. you are truly an inspiration!

-cheryl