Potty Training

[Guest guest]

I totally agree with phine.

It is very frustrating, but so worth it when they are finally trained. The

more you push them, the more accidents my son would have. Finally, I backed

off and it literally took 2 days for him. No questions, no threats,

nothing!! It was wonderful.

Good Luck!

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[Guest guest]

I had a nightmare, really stressed potty training DS1 with the pressure of

playgroup starting at 2.5 years. (One afternoon found me at the bottom of

the garden shut in the shed unable to come out as I was so furious) - my 2

boys were looking out from the house, at me, in amazement and horror (DS1

with no pants on) through the patio doors when DH came home.

However as soon as he wanted to DS1 was dry within a week (around 2 years 7

months) and it took less than that to get him dry at night (just recently)!

I'm definatley of the " wait until he's ready " point of view.

Good luck

phine

(Mum to 3.5 & Ben 2.5, Cambridge NCT)

[Guest guest]

Your sausage roll story reminds me of my eldest daughter, now fully

adult,and a mother herself, when I was potty training her. Anxious

to encourage her, I said if she " performed " on the potty, she could

have any present she wanted. She duly produced a wee and amidst much

applause and praise, I asked her what she had chosen as her prize.

She looked up at me, wide eyed.

" I want my nappy back on. "

Ruthie

[Guest guest]

" I want my nappy back on. "

Ruthie

That was one smart kid

Cerys

[Guest guest]

-As a mother of 8, by the time I reached the last few kids I gave up

potty training altogether; couldn't be bothered. I found out the

following: it either takes you a few months if you start when they

aren't ready, or one day, if you start when they are.

So I wait till they're about 3 and they do it on their birthday

usually, day and night on the same day. I turned a deaf ear to the

" isn't he/she trained YET? " and just waited it out. So much simpler!

Ruthie

[Guest guest]

> So I wait till they're about 3 and they do it on their birthday

> usually, day and night on the same day. I turned a deaf ear to the

> " isn't he/she trained YET? " and just waited it out. So much simpler!

Yep - but he'd miss a term of pre-school and it is a pre-requisite

[Guest guest]

> > I have just started with him sitting on his potty at each nappy

change >

I'm curious if anyone has done what I'm doing....

I've been sitting DD on the potty since around 7 months - first just

before bedtime, where for a while she always pooed!! and now for the

last 2/3 months after every nappy change.

She always does a pee and quite substantial ones too!! but obviously

her nappy is not dry.

I'm not expecting her to be potty trained for quite a while (she's

only 13 months) but at least she's seen a potty and knows what it's

for.

Now I know nothing about potty training so my thoughts may be

completely wrong, but I wondered if some of the problems of potty

training could be because the potty isn't introduced at all until the

child is 2/3 years old. Could it make a difference introducing the

potty earlier (she asks hopefully)?

Of course, I realise I'm influenced and ever hopeful because my

mother had all four of her children potty trained well before 2 years

old.

I guess I'll be buying the NCT Potty Training book in due course!

Janet

[Guest guest]

--- In nct-coffee@y..., " & -Jane " <bj@g...> > Yep

- but he'd miss a term of pre-school and it is a pre-requisite

>

I get SOOOOO angry when I hear this. All pre-school groups

should be tolerant of non-trained children. Mine certainly weren't

trained till past three - and to expect it before that is totally out of

order.

My pre-school takes children in trainer pants and nappies. They

only change a child's nappy if they do poos! Fortunately neither of

mine did - but they both wore trainer pants for the first term. I

found they learnt quite quickly once they started going to the toilet

with the other children - early peer pressure.

Joe still has accidents - but this is more to do with holding in

poo, which can go on for a week or so. He is having a kidney

scan soon as he has had a constant stream of UTIs. If anyone

has had this problem I would love to hear from them.

Caroline

[Guest guest]

> Of course, I realise I'm influenced and ever hopeful because

my

> mother had all four of her children potty trained well before 2

years

> old.

Probably because she had to wash terry nappies!! (todays

washables being very different I hasten to add!)

It doesn't sound wrong at all - I'm sure she will make it clear

when she is ready to try pants. I expect most of the 'results' so far

have been a pavlov's dog type thing - potty=wee. or just luck!

The potty training book does look excellent.

Caroline

[Guest guest]

caroline@... wrote:

> --- In nct-coffee@y..., " & -Jane " <bj@g...> > Yep

> - but he'd miss a term of pre-school and it is a pre-requisite

> >

>

And Emma wasn't even vaguely potty trained when we sent her to pre-school. we

just sent about

4 changes of clothes and the preschool changed her and sent her home with a full

carrier bag of

washing. She got the hang of it eventually, but is still wet at night (4.5) and

still damp

during the day.

If I had waited until she was dry during the day she would never had made

preschool and would

have missed out on 18 months of inter child interaction which she badly needed.

Sue

--

Again a hearty Hmmm...

[Guest guest]

> --- In nct-coffee@y..., " & -Jane " <bj@g...> > Yep

> - but he'd miss a term of pre-school and it is a pre-requisite

> >

>

> I get SOOOOO angry when I hear this. All pre-school groups

> should be tolerant of non-trained children. Mine certainly weren't

> trained till past three - and to expect it before that is totally

out of

> order.

Caroline; my pre school group also didn't mind if my kids came in

nappies. To be completely fair, I lived locally, and if mine did a

poo I would get a phonecall and would go along and change him or her,

but in general this didn't happen. I did worry this would unsettle

the kid and they would want to come home afterwards, but IIRC this

seldom happened anyway, and if I changed the child quickly and left,

they knew they weren't coming home till hometime.

I can well understand people's feeling of pressure if a playgroup

won't accept children in nappies, but under 3 yr olds are very young

to be reliably dry and clean anyway.

Ruthie

[Guest guest]

At 13 months its more likely to be a Pavlov's responds than a conscious

thing i.e. cold potty on bum makes her wee. I think the general view of

very early potty training is that it is the parents who are trained, not the

child, in that they remember to produce the potty at regular intervals. But

I know of a couple of little girls who were reliably trained by 21 mths so

hopefully you're one of the lucky ones.

Lesley

------------------------

From: kassc-dj

I'm curious if anyone has done what I'm doing....

I've been sitting DD on the potty since around 7 months - first just

before bedtime, where for a while she always pooed!! and now for the

last 2/3 months after every nappy change.

She always does a pee and quite substantial ones too!! but obviously

her nappy is not dry.

[Guest guest]

Hi All,

Thought this would make you laugh. I'm on a list for mums who had

baby's in February 2000 and a couple of the mums there are trying to

potty train their baby's already. One woman was bragging about how

her little girl has the potty next to the toilet and when she (the

mum) goes to the toilet, so does her daughter. I didn't like to tell

her that it was probably luck more than the daughter knowing what the

hell she was doing :-)

Sue M

____________________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

> At 13 months its more likely to be a Pavlov's responds than a conscious

> thing i.e. cold potty on bum makes her wee. I think the general view of

> very early potty training is that it is the parents who are trained, not

the

> child, in that they remember to produce the potty at regular intervals.

But

> I know of a couple of little girls who were reliably trained by 21 mths so

> hopefully you're one of the lucky ones.

>

> Lesley

Yes, it does vary a lot. Lawrie I actively trained at 2.5 years and it took

a month of persuasion and rewarding, whereas Verity started asking to use to

loo at 17 months! I humoured her, which was easy at home as she used to

constantly strip and be running around naked and she used to do about 70% on

the loo/potty. She was completely dry and clean in the day the week after

her second birthday.

Hannah, 27

Mum to Bethany 6 1/2, Lawrence 5, Verity 2 1/2 and Alfie, born 13/02/01

See our family photos at :-

http://albums.photopoint.com/j/AlbumList?u=58003

[Guest guest]

Oh yes, Lesley, thank you. I would get this every time from my mother " you

four were all trained practically as soon as you could walk, you modern

mothers you just don't do it right, make a rod for your own back....carp,

carp.... " Personally I have better things to do with my time and nursed two

kids with prolapsed rectum from being forced to sit on potties and strain.

(Not saying that anyone here is doing that !!) Carys trained herself with a

couple of days at her own instigation just after her 2nd birthday but she

was the earliest. Kieran at 5 still has to be reminded to go to the loo )

Like just about everything else, its what " suits you madam " )

Lesley,

Antenatal teacher, trainee breasteeding counsellor.

Demented mother of 3. Worthing.

" We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse " .

RE: Re: Potty Training

> At 13 months its more likely to be a Pavlov's responds than a conscious

> thing i.e. cold potty on bum makes her wee. I think the general view of

> very early potty training is that it is the parents who are trained, not

the

> child, in that they remember to produce the potty at regular intervals.

But

> I know of a couple of little girls who were reliably trained by 21 mths so

> hopefully you're one of the lucky ones.

>

> Lesley

> ------------------------

>

> From: kassc-dj

>

>

> I'm curious if anyone has done what I'm doing....

> I've been sitting DD on the potty since around 7 months - first just

> before bedtime, where for a while she always pooed!! and now for the

> last 2/3 months after every nappy change.

> She always does a pee and quite substantial ones too!! but obviously

> her nappy is not dry.

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

> All pre-school groups

> should be tolerant of non-trained children.

Is it not more often than not a staffing issue in that changing a nappy

takes a member of staff away with one child for a length of time, so that

the ratios for the staff/children remaining in the playgroup are not

sufficient? Also I don't know if a higher level of social services vetting

has to take place for nappy changing than for accompanying to the toilet -

though what's the difference really between changing a nappy and wiping a

bottom? Just musing.

Lynda

SAHM to (8), (5), Fraser (3), Callum (15/5/00)

Newsletter editor, Mid-Northumberland Branch

Area Rep, Region 7

www.familygarland.co.uk

[Guest guest]

Lynda Garland wrote:

> > All pre-school groups

> > should be tolerant of non-trained children.

>

> Is it not more often than not a staffing issue in that changing a nappy

> takes a member of staff away with one child for a length of time, so that

> the ratios for the staff/children remaining in the playgroup are not

> sufficient? Also I don't know if a higher level of social services vetting

> has to take place for nappy changing than for accompanying to the toilet -

> though what's the difference really between changing a nappy and wiping a

> bottom? Just musing.

Our preschool said that they didn't have the facilities to get rid of nappies,

and with 20

children that was potentially 20 or more dirty nappies. Apparently this

constitutes clinical

waste and they can't afford to have it removed from the premises.

Of course my answer would be to return the nappies to the parents to dispose of,

but then you are

faced with a health and safety issue, in storing poo-ey nappies until hometime.

Mind you they didn't have a problem with throwing away a pair of poo-ey knickers

of Emma's. They

were very embarrassed that they had thrown away my property, but I reassured

them that I couln'dt

bear washing poo either so would have done the same. God help me if I have a

child who poos in

his/her knickers next time. It is either going to be very expensive or I am

going to spend a lot

of time retching. And why is it I can cope with poo in a nappy, but not poo in

knickers?

Sue

[Guest guest]

Also I don't know if a higher level of social services vetting

>has to take place for nappy changing than for accompanying to the toilet -

Yes think so. This is why 's nursery will take children in

pull-ups but not in nappies - to have children in *nappies* they have to

provide " changing facilities " . Saying they can attend in pull-ups is a way

of getting around this.

Newsletter Editor, Leighton Buzzard & District NCT

SAHM to 19/9/97 and Caitlin 12/1/00.

Photo Album

http://albums.photopoint.com/j/AlbumIndex?u=697874 & a=11513591

[Guest guest]

>Mind you they didn't have a problem with throwing away a pair of poo-ey

knickers of Emma's. They

>were very embarrassed that they had thrown away my property,

Exactly this happened to a pair of 's pants Sue! So they let me

keep the ones they put on him as compensation!

[Guest guest]

> And why is it I can cope with poo in a nappy, but not poo in knickers?

Glad I'm not the only one who has to cope with this!

I've discovered that leaving them for a few hours means it has dried up

enough to peel off into the loo! Yuck!!!!!!!!!

Caroline

mother of 'Joe the poo monster' aged 4.5

[Guest guest]

No, I'm sorry but life is too short. I throw the whole thing in the bin and

buy some more knickers )

Lesley,

Antenatal teacher, trainee breasteeding counsellor.

Demented mother of 3. Worthing.

" We are born naked, wet and hungry. Then things get worse " .

Re: potty training

> > And why is it I can cope with poo in a nappy, but not poo in knickers?

> Glad I'm not the only one who has to cope with this!

> I've discovered that leaving them for a few hours means it has dried up

> enough to peel off into the loo! Yuck!!!!!!!!!

> Caroline

> mother of 'Joe the poo monster' aged 4.5

>

>

>

> *** NCT enquiry line - 0 ***

>

> Live chat http://www.yahoogroups.com/chat/nct-coffee

>

> Have you found out about all the other groups for the NCT online?

>

>

[Guest guest]

>

>Mind you they didn't have a problem with throwing away a pair of

>poo-ey knickers of Emma's. They

>were very embarrassed that they had thrown away my property, but I

>reassured them that I couln'dt

>bear washing poo either so would have done the same. God help me if

>I have a child who poos in

>his/her knickers next time. It is either going to be very expensive

>or I am going to spend a lot

>of time retching. And why is it I can cope with poo in a nappy, but

>not poo in knickers?

>

>Sue

I dunno, but you are not alone!

(Actually it is a) a lot harder to get off the child without getting

it all over and a lot harder to get a good dea of it to drop off

into the toilet)

Oh and to answer someone else - it isn't the terries that were the

problem for earlier generations of parents, it was the washing

technology!

--

jennifer@...

Vaudin

[Guest guest]

Call me optimistic, but I have been putting DS on the potty and toilet since

about 13 months, Now he is 20 months and trys to pull his trousers down

standing next to the potty when he wants a wee! I don't put him there, I wait

to see him pull at his pants or take my hand and lead me to the loo. Over the

last couple of months I don't remember not getting a good wee from him when he

asks. By no means is he dry all the time but probably 4 days in 5 he is.

However he is like many other I suspect in that he will sit in a poo quite

happily and deny all knowledge of a smelly bum!

I always let the child make the choice, DS showed an interest very early so I

let him, If my next doesn't want the potty, I won't force it.

Kirsten

Mum to 20 months

Membership admin Woking & Knaphill.

[Guest guest]

Just my 2p worth.....

As many of you will know, I have just recently had problems trying to

potty train (2 and 11 months). I reckon 2 things:

1) If you start early, you will probably get success earlier, but the

period of 'accidents' will be longer too.

2) If you start later, you will have a completely dry and clean child

in a much shorter space of time.

Could be completely wrong, but it's just my opinion.

, incidentally, is doing brilliantly. He is dry and clean most

days. He has very occassional accidents - mostly when he is playing

with other children and 'forgets' to go - but on the whole I think he

has cracked it! I can't remember which of you wonderful people

suggested the 'put him in pants and go for it' strategy, but it

certainly worked.

On the subject of playgroups. ' playgroup allow the children to

go if they are in nappies, but the mums must stay on the premises

unless they are toilet trained.

' school nursery will not take him unless he is fully toilet

trained. I found this unbelievable. After all, the same school

would insist he went the following year, potty trained or not.

Hopefully, this isn't now going to be a problem, but that's not the

point. Some of the children going into that nursery will only have

turned three a few days before they start. Why should a three year

old be told they can't be like all their friends, just because they

aren't toilet trained? After all, they are only there for 2 and a

half hours. The chances of a poo in that time are very slim, and

their nappies don't need changed in that time otherwise.

Rant over!!!!

Aileen

Tired but wide-awake in Doncaster (if that makes any sense at all!)

[Guest guest]

Potty training is like everything else to do with parenting - variable! My

older children came out of terry nappies at just over two, while the next

was nearly 21/2, and the youngest one, nearer three (both in disps). There

hasn't been any real difference in the reliability of any of them. They all

seem to have cast iron bladders, once trained. The major traumas came with

training the older ones. Whether that was because they were girls or wore

disposables, or indeed were bloodier minded - who knows??

At any rate, well done !!

Lesley

----------------------

From: Aileen

Just my 2p worth.....

I reckon 2 things:

1) If you start early, you will probably get success earlier, but the

period of 'accidents' will be longer too.

2) If you start later, you will have a completely dry and clean child

in a much shorter space of time.

Could be completely wrong, but it's just my opinion.