What do we do...when are children are being made fun of?

[Guest guest]

My son is in his second year of preschool...and there are a few boys

that are more aggressive in the class. I keep seeing situations and I

don't quite know what to say or do as a Mom. First of all I am

dealing with 4 & 5 year olds here...and there parents.

Example:

What do you say to a child when they say to my son " you talk

funny " ....as a parent what do I do....or say....to both children!

doesnt understand that he talks funny????

We also have the problem with my son invading others space...he will

really like to play with another child..and get so excited..and then

will put his face up to the child and talk to him...then of course

the other child pushes him away.At this age there are lots of kids in

his class that that hug each other...to show how much they like them

etc.......and then we get to some of the boys who don't like to...so

I am just confused about how to exactly address this issue.

There are also so many times...when I see my son being teased...but

my son really has no clue what is going on. If a child pushes him

away my son actually thinks its a game...and it will make him want to

play with them even more....so I have to continously intervene...also

when he is with other children he doesnt talk as much as he does at

home...and of course other kids don't understand him, and then tease

him.

He also is very clumsy.....and if the kids are kicking a ball

around..he won't use his feet he will go and pick the ball up and

throw it with his hands...so of course that causes problems.

Eating is a huge issue.....the food is always all over his face on

the table, his lap, on the floor, knocking into the child next to him

cause he can't sit still....then he can't chew with his mouth closed

properly..so then you have to here the comments from another child

that is not eating with his mouth closed.....or comments

like Why does always put his hands with his food in his

mouth? Or knocked our blocks over.....(well I know he walked

by and he didn't even mean to knock them over) but ????? UGH! LOL!

Just wondering what everone else goes through and what they say or

do...or what you have learned.

Thanks

[Guest guest]

I have a few suggestions.

When someone asks why your child talks funy, you might want to say

something that lots of people talk differently. Some people speak

different languages, some people use their hands to talk, and some

people learn how to use their words when they are older. Don't

make a big deal out of it. Kids are just curious.

At school, let the teacher know what is going on. The teacher can

probably suggest a few ways of handling your son interacting with

other children. As far as your son picking up the ball, sign your

son up for a soccer class. That way, he'll learn the rules of

soccer. Even if he can't play well, he'll still learn that you

don't pick up the ball in soccer.

Kids get teased all the time. You can't intervene all the time.

You just got to teach your child how to handle it. My " normal " son

has always been teased more than the girls. He's small for his age,

and he's a young 4th grader (Sept. birthday). He's also very smart

and non-athletic. I've told him to ignore the teasing unless it

gets physical. If someone hurts him, he's supposed to tell me (and

I'll talk to the teacher or principal), or talk to the teacher (or

other adult around).

I don't know of any kid that doesn't get teased at school. I've let

all my children know this. I was teased when I was a kid, and I've

told my kids about that. I told them I was teased that I wasn't

pretty, and that I was a geek. Well, my children think I'm pretty,

and they like that I'm smart. They think the kids that teased me

were just stupid. For some reason, this really helps them when they

are teased.

[Guest guest]

Suzi,

I LOVE THIS! I just read this to my husband and he loved it too. (My

husband was bullied a ton when he was a kid.) I like the sharing of how you

were teased. That is so powerful. You were teased for things that weren’t

true and you survived. I think sometimes kids feel like they won’t survive

it.

Thanks for sharing this ingenious strategy.

Tricia Morin

North Carolina

Kids get teased all the time. You can't intervene all the time.

You just got to teach your child how to handle it. My " normal " son

has always been teased more than the girls. He's small for his age,

and he's a young 4th grader (Sept. birthday). He's also very smart

and non-athletic. I've told him to ignore the teasing unless it

gets physical. If someone hurts him, he's supposed to tell me (and

I'll talk to the teacher or principal), or talk to the teacher (or

other adult around).

I don't know of any kid that doesn't get teased at school. I've let

all my children know this. I was teased when I was a kid, and I've

told my kids about that. I told them I was teased that I wasn't

pretty, and that I was a geek. Well, my children think I'm pretty,

and they like that I'm smart. They think the kids that teased me

were just stupid. For some reason, this really helps them when they

are teased.