Guest guest Posted January 29, 2001 Report Share Posted January 29, 2001 > The emotion and descriptions on the thread really made me > realise that no-one should ever say 'Better luck next time' (which I > never have but I have heard people do). Yes I have had this a lot. I like angels4ever.com when I need to have a small grief session - it makes you realise that it could be a lot worse. My details are on there as an 'Angel Mummy' and I might be featured in a few months (you have a page devoted to your story in their monthly newsletter) Caroline Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2001 Report Share Posted January 29, 2001 > The emotion and descriptions on the thread really made me > realise that no-one should ever say 'Better luck next time' (which I > never have but I have heard people do). Yes I have had this a lot. I like angels4ever.com when I need to have a small grief session - it makes you realise that it could be a lot worse. My details are on there as an 'Angel Mummy' and I might be featured in a few months (you have a page devoted to your story in their monthly newsletter) Caroline Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2001 Report Share Posted January 29, 2001 I get 'Well I suppose you should be grateful you've already got one' if I ever talk about miscarriage or infertility. It is so inappropriate on so many levels. I much prefer a 'I am so sorry' or 'It must be very hard for you' - as that acknowledges my feelings, shows empathy, and doesn't evoke feelings of anger, guilt or weariness. Unfortunately being a BFC didn't help much when I was grieving. Everyone was there with their own form of advise and I was just screaming in my head - 'You're not supposed to do it that way - where's your open questions, acknowledging feelings, I don't want or need your opinion'. It was all rather frustrating. And FWIW my miscarriage (missed but natural) wasn't much like the ones described on this message board. Very much a heavy period which although less traumatic, did sort of make me doubt the pregnancy in the first place. According to my GP a lot gets reabsorbed (don't like to think about it really). Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2001 Report Share Posted January 29, 2001 I get 'Well I suppose you should be grateful you've already got one' if I ever talk about miscarriage or infertility. It is so inappropriate on so many levels. I much prefer a 'I am so sorry' or 'It must be very hard for you' - as that acknowledges my feelings, shows empathy, and doesn't evoke feelings of anger, guilt or weariness. Unfortunately being a BFC didn't help much when I was grieving. Everyone was there with their own form of advise and I was just screaming in my head - 'You're not supposed to do it that way - where's your open questions, acknowledging feelings, I don't want or need your opinion'. It was all rather frustrating. And FWIW my miscarriage (missed but natural) wasn't much like the ones described on this message board. Very much a heavy period which although less traumatic, did sort of make me doubt the pregnancy in the first place. According to my GP a lot gets reabsorbed (don't like to think about it really). Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 29, 2001 Report Share Posted January 29, 2001 I get 'Well I suppose you should be grateful you've already got one' if I ever talk about miscarriage or infertility. It is so inappropriate on so many levels. I much prefer a 'I am so sorry' or 'It must be very hard for you' - as that acknowledges my feelings, shows empathy, and doesn't evoke feelings of anger, guilt or weariness. Unfortunately being a BFC didn't help much when I was grieving. Everyone was there with their own form of advise and I was just screaming in my head - 'You're not supposed to do it that way - where's your open questions, acknowledging feelings, I don't want or need your opinion'. It was all rather frustrating. And FWIW my miscarriage (missed but natural) wasn't much like the ones described on this message board. Very much a heavy period which although less traumatic, did sort of make me doubt the pregnancy in the first place. According to my GP a lot gets reabsorbed (don't like to think about it really). Sue Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2001 Report Share Posted March 1, 2001 , I have a huge lump in my throat, I'm so sorry. Lots of love and <<<hugs>>> to you and Jurgen. Thinking of you, x >I thought I'd better tell you I've definitely miscarried. The >bleeding has got a lot worse along with quite a lot of pain, and so thats it. I'm > fragile, but coping, as is Jurgen. is in great form, clapping and singing, to keep us amused. Just thought you would like to know, but I'll > probably be quite quiet for a few days. Thanks all oyu rmessages of > support - I really appreciate it, we both do. > > Speak to you all soon > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2001 Report Share Posted March 1, 2001 > I thought I'd better tell you I've definitely miscarried. > Hi susan and jurgen - I've just caught up with all my messages and wanted to say how sorry I was to hear of your miscarriage. I miscarried at about 12 weeks about 14 months ago and the one thing I was glad of was that I had told everyone I was pregnant because when it happened it meant people could be aware of my pain and in actual fact turned out to be very supportive in many practical ways (difficult for you, living in the middle of no-where, I know). Anyway, I hope you are soon back to full health - my prayers are with you both. ann SAHM (and stay at home worker now , too!) to james (15), Kirsty (13) and Ben(2). Editor Cambridge newsletter Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2001 Report Share Posted March 1, 2001 > I thought I'd better tell you I've definitely miscarried. The bleeding > has got a lot worse along with quite a lot of pain, and so thats it. I'm > fragile, but coping, as is Jurgen. is in great form, clapping and > singing, to keep us amused. Just thought you would like to know, but I'll > probably be quite quiet for a few days. Thanks all oyu rmessages of > support - I really appreciate it, we both do. > > Speak to you all soon > > So sorry to hear this . Will be thinking of you (((( Hannah, 27 Mum to Bethany 6 1/2, Lawrence 5, Verity 2 1/2 and Alfie, born 13/02/01 See our family photos at :- http://albums.photopoint.com/j/AlbumList?u=58003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2001 Report Share Posted March 1, 2001 > I thought I'd better tell you I've definitely miscarried. The bleeding > has got a lot worse along with quite a lot of pain, and so thats it. I'm > fragile, but coping, as is Jurgen. is in great form, clapping and > singing, to keep us amused. Just thought you would like to know, but I'll > probably be quite quiet for a few days. Thanks all oyu rmessages of > support - I really appreciate it, we both do. > > Speak to you all soon > > So sorry to hear this . Will be thinking of you (((( Hannah, 27 Mum to Bethany 6 1/2, Lawrence 5, Verity 2 1/2 and Alfie, born 13/02/01 See our family photos at :- http://albums.photopoint.com/j/AlbumList?u=58003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted March 1, 2001 Report Share Posted March 1, 2001 > I thought I'd better tell you I've definitely miscarried. The bleeding > has got a lot worse along with quite a lot of pain, and so thats it. I'm > fragile, but coping, as is Jurgen. is in great form, clapping and > singing, to keep us amused. Just thought you would like to know, but I'll > probably be quite quiet for a few days. Thanks all oyu rmessages of > support - I really appreciate it, we both do. > > Speak to you all soon > > So sorry to hear this . Will be thinking of you (((( Hannah, 27 Mum to Bethany 6 1/2, Lawrence 5, Verity 2 1/2 and Alfie, born 13/02/01 See our family photos at :- http://albums.photopoint.com/j/AlbumList?u=58003 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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