Ladies advice please

[Guest guest]

Hi everyone.

I have a question related to relationships with the opposite sex.

Please forgive me if this question has already been asked.

I am in my early 20's, and because of VV and vaginismus, and the

frustration with the healthcare system, the 24/7 pain, and the

embarassment I feel (as I have not come to acceptance as of yet)..I

have ZERO sex drive.

I was the aggressor in my last serious relationship, a very healthy

sex drive before the pain began.

Now I am single, and, am putting off dating altogether. I dont know

HOW to tell someone, I am ashamed and would rather say nothing, and

I feel no one will want to be with me if I tell them I cannot be

intimate, and I have no answers from my doctors and that there is

very little known about the condition.

I fear that even if a man does accept it, he would cheat to fufill

his needs. I want to avoid that.

I have talked with and mutually smiled/made eye contact with men,

yet I turn away from them, because I feel a sensation of why bother,

when I cannot fulfill a relationship intimately?

My question is for the single ladies who cannot have sexual

relations, how do you approach sex when it comes up? Do you tell

him? When is a good time, and, what do you say? And, do you still

date?

I have not gone on a date since the pain began, and I dont intend

to, but it hurts emotionally when I think I have shut off such a

pleasureable part of life, which is bonding with someone.

Thanks in advance.