question

[Guest guest]

Wow, I would be interested to hear what has to say about this. I

have absolutely no knowledge of the effects of Pro-Efa.

I took Amber off of them last year after a nasty battle with diarrhea-

it was a really nasty bug that we couldn't shake and the doctor wanted

everything stopped. Unfortunately, we never got back in teh swing of

things after that. Iknow I still have a bottle left and will have to

start her on them again (assuming they are still good). I am going to

search the archives now for the EPA's. I have never heard of them

before.

[Guest guest]

Not sure if you've read any of my posts on multiple dosing of fish oil - but

I think more folks should try it. No down side. I know a few have said sleep

problems - but I'll take a bad night's sleep if my little one can " tell me "

what he was dreaming about. Its worth it. We have seen such improvement (a

surge) when we went to twice a day, and now 3 X a day dosing. My 25 pound

nearly 2.5 year old takes half teaspoon pro-EFA (nordic naturals liquid)

three times a day. It makes sense to try to keep a more consistent level of

the omegas in the body if we are actually treating a " deficiency " or

abnormal fatty acid metabolism. I'm not sure what the half-life is, but I

suspect like many supplements it is not long and should be gone in just a

few hours. (If anyone has half-life info on omegas, please post). We are

insuring a bolus of omegas at every meal - and the results have been

dramatic. -

[ ] question

(and anyone that can help)

Here are a few questions I've come up with recently regarding the Pro-

EFA's

1) Do your children act as if they " crave " the fish oil? (Constantly

asking for it, even after giving them their daily dose)

2) How long does it last in their system?

3) How much do you give to your kids or yourself?

4) Should adults or older children start out on the smallest dosage

first (one capsule a day for 6mths) Or can we do 2 to start, then add

the Pro-EPA after the initial 6mths?

My daughter, Abby who is now 4.7 has always craved her " fish juice "

she started the regiment by spoon almost a year and half ago, and

just this past summer, can now bite them and suck the juice out dry.

She has always asked for more, always seemed to crave them. About 2

weeks ago, she succeeded in getting more then her usual dose. I had

given her 2 capsules in the early am as usual. Later that day while I

was cleaning, she got to the bottle, took 2 out, came to me and

showed me that she had 2 in her mouth. I immediately talked to her

about the dangers of climbing up on the chair, to the cabinet, how

she isn't supposed touch the fish juice w/out Mommy, etc etc..

Well she had sneaked them again several hours later. Needless to say

I was horrified.

I new she wasnt allergic to the fish, or iodine. Considering she had

been on them for a year and half. However, she had never taken 6 in

one day. I called a friend who gives her children the EFA'S, as

well as my dr. Both had said to just watch, and the " worst case " was

a speech surge. I then closely watched and made observations.

The effects were incredible.

1)more clarity in speech

2)more consistency in speech

3)more words (although some of the new words weren't as clear as some

of the " older " words)

4)less frustration in communication, and self help skills.

5)able to multi-task (jump on the trampoline and say the ABC's, count

1-10)

6)some sleep disturbance

7)increased activity level/impulsiveness

We finished off the bottle that week (2 capsules a day) The effects

were still the same however. Unfortunately, I

couldn't reorder for about a week. My new order came yesterday. I

started yesterday afternoon. 2 EFA's, 1 EPA. She went to bed at 8pm.

Awake from 2-5am. And woke up at 6:45. She took her new regiment dose

before she went to school at 7:30am, I can't wait to see the results

of this new regiment. I'm hoping to see results soon, maybe by

Friday.

Thanks for any feed back..

Dawn in NJ

[Guest guest]

All I could find on the half-life indicates it is fairly long:

http://www.oilofpisces.com/generalhealtheffects.html

" The researchers also noted that the half-life (the time it takes to reduce

initial concentration by 50 per cent) of ALA in blood plasma was quite low

at about one hour. In comparison, the half-life of EPA was 67 hours and

that of DHA 20 hours. "

I know nothing of this source, but a fish oil company uses this same

research almost word for word in their description.

Miche

At 05:20 PM 1/11/2006, you wrote:

>Not sure if you've read any of my posts on multiple dosing of fish oil - but

>I think more folks should try it. No down side. I know a few have said sleep

>problems - but I'll take a bad night's sleep if my little one can " tell me "

>what he was dreaming about. Its worth it. We have seen such improvement (a

>surge) when we went to twice a day, and now 3 X a day dosing. My 25 pound

>nearly 2.5 year old takes half teaspoon pro-EFA (nordic naturals liquid)

>three times a day. It makes sense to try to keep a more consistent level of

>the omegas in the body if we are actually treating a " deficiency " or

>abnormal fatty acid metabolism. I'm not sure what the half-life is, but I

>suspect like many supplements it is not long and should be gone in just a

>few hours. (If anyone has half-life info on omegas, please post). We are

>insuring a bolus of omegas at every meal - and the results have been

>dramatic. -

[Guest guest]

> " The researchers also noted that the half-life (the time it takes

to

> reduce initial concentration by 50 per cent) of ALA in blood plasma

> was quite low at about one hour. In comparison, the half-life of

EPA

> was 67 hours and that of DHA 20 hours. "

If this quote is accurate it's interesting and could explain why the

EPA appears to be more important than the DHA. From what I found

it appears these rates are based on rat studies, but I'm not

sure. Then again perhaps there's more research on this since

2001.

I'm not sure because how much research has been done in this area?

We know with heart disease, where the most research has been

done in regards to PUFAs in the blood, neurological aspects of the

blood/brain barrier have not been examined as much. And this is

changing but when Tanner was first on EFAs -pharmaceuticals weren't

funding research on fish oils/PUFAs/LCPs/EFAs or whatever you call

them - and most G Public Parents were afraid to give their child

fish oils (not pizza, french fry, or doughnut oils mind you -just

that suspicious fish oil)...OK some still are but that group is

shrinking big time and now MDs are telling patients to put their

kids on EFAs even prior to them seeing the children.

(make sure it's the right formula)

We keep learning about more and more the EFAs are good for:

(for example)

http://www.webmd.com/content/article/116/112088.htm

and

http://today.reuters.co.uk/news/newsArticle.aspx?type=healthNews & storyID=2006-01\

-09T230736Z_01_YUE983275_RTRIDST_0_HEALTH-ASTHMA-FISHOIL-DC.XML

and

http://www.wfaa.com/sharedcontent/dws/wfaa/localnews/news8/stories/wfaa051228_wz\

_mbfishoil.1b1bf1e0.html

Here's the rat study I found from 2001 (and -Dr. Rapoport's

email is here too so you can contact him)

Delivery and turnover of plasma-derived essential PUFAs in mammalian

brain

Stanley I. Rapoporta, C. J. Changa, and Arthur A. Spectorb

a Brain Physiology and Metabolism Section, University of Iowa, Iowa

City, IA 52242

b Bldg. 10, Rm. 6N202, National Institute on Aging, National

Institutes of Health, Bethesda, MD 20892, and Department of

Biochemistry, University of Iowa, Iowa City, IA 52242

Correspondence to: Stanley I. Rapoport, To whom correspondence

should be addressed., sir@... (E-mail)

" Polyunsaturated fatty acids (PUFAs) are critical to nervous system

function and structure, but their rates of incorporation from plasma

into brain have not been evaluated. In the adult rat, calculations

based on our model show that at least 3;–5% of esterified brain

arachidonic acid (AA) and 2;–8% of esterified brain docosahexaenoic

acid (DHA) are replaced daily by unesterified PUFAs in plasma. These

rates, when related to unlabeled brain PUFA composition, give half-

lives of 1;–2 weeks for plasma-brain exchange of AA and DHA. In the

human brain, the arachidonate replacement rate is 0.3% per day.

Although unesterified plasma PUFA concentrations are low, their

rates of incorporation into brain are sufficient to compensate for

metabolic and efflux losses, so that PUFA transport from plasma into

brain as a component of a lipoprotein is unnecessary. Dietary

supplementation, by altering plasma unesterified PUFA

concentrations, can regulate brain PUFA content and may help to

treat brain diseases involving PUFA imbalance. — Rapoport, S. I., M.

C. J. Chang, and A. A. Spector. Delivery and turnover of plasma-

derived essential PUFAs in mammalian brain. J. Lipid Res. 2001. 42:

678;–685.

http://www.jlr.org/cgi/content/full/42/5/678

=====

[Guest guest]

,

I have been reading your posts and am interested in the multi

dosing. I feel like we are at a plateau. My son takes 2 pro efas

and 1 epa each night. What would constitute a multi dose giving him

1 efa and 1 epa in the morning? He does have some focusing problems

occassionally. I really want another surge. I guess I don't notice

it as much as others but you know it gets frustrating. He is 6.

Thanks,

Mia

>

> Not sure if you've read any of my posts on multiple dosing of fish

oil - but

> I think more folks should try it. No down side. I know a few have

said sleep

> problems - but I'll take a bad night's sleep if my little one

can " tell me "

> what he was dreaming about. Its worth it. We have seen such

improvement (a

> surge) when we went to twice a day, and now 3 X a day dosing. My

25 pound

> nearly 2.5 year old takes half teaspoon pro-EFA (nordic naturals

liquid)

> three times a day. It makes sense to try to keep a more consistent

level of

> the omegas in the body if we are actually treating a " deficiency "

or

> abnormal fatty acid metabolism. I'm not sure what the half-life

is, but I

> suspect like many supplements it is not long and should be gone in

just a

> few hours. (If anyone has half-life info on omegas, please post).

We are

> insuring a bolus of omegas at every meal - and the results have

been

> dramatic. -

>

>

> [ ] question

>

>

> (and anyone that can help)

> Here are a few questions I've come up with recently regarding the

Pro-

> EFA's

> 1) Do your children act as if they " crave " the fish oil?

(Constantly

> asking for it, even after giving them their daily dose)

>

> 2) How long does it last in their system?

>

> 3) How much do you give to your kids or yourself?

>

> 4) Should adults or older children start out on the smallest dosage

> first (one capsule a day for 6mths) Or can we do 2 to start, then

add

> the Pro-EPA after the initial 6mths?

>

> My daughter, Abby who is now 4.7 has always craved her " fish juice "

> she started the regiment by spoon almost a year and half ago, and

> just this past summer, can now bite them and suck the juice out

dry.

>

> She has always asked for more, always seemed to crave them. About 2

> weeks ago, she succeeded in getting more then her usual dose. I had

> given her 2 capsules in the early am as usual. Later that day

while I

> was cleaning, she got to the bottle, took 2 out, came to me and

> showed me that she had 2 in her mouth. I immediately talked to her

> about the dangers of climbing up on the chair, to the cabinet, how

> she isn't supposed touch the fish juice w/out Mommy, etc etc..

> Well she had sneaked them again several hours later. Needless to

say

> I was horrified.

>

> I new she wasnt allergic to the fish, or iodine. Considering she

had

> been on them for a year and half. However, she had never taken 6 in

> one day. I called a friend who gives her children the EFA'S, as

> well as my dr. Both had said to just watch, and the " worst case "

was

> a speech surge. I then closely watched and made observations.

> The effects were incredible.

>

> 1)more clarity in speech

> 2)more consistency in speech

> 3)more words (although some of the new words weren't as clear as

some

> of the " older " words)

> 4)less frustration in communication, and self help skills.

> 5)able to multi-task (jump on the trampoline and say the ABC's,

count

> 1-10)

> 6)some sleep disturbance

> 7)increased activity level/impulsiveness

>

> We finished off the bottle that week (2 capsules a day) The effects

> were still the same however. Unfortunately, I

> couldn't reorder for about a week. My new order came yesterday. I

> started yesterday afternoon. 2 EFA's, 1 EPA. She went to bed at

8pm.

> Awake from 2-5am. And woke up at 6:45. She took her new regiment

dose

> before she went to school at 7:30am, I can't wait to see the

results

> of this new regiment. I'm hoping to see results soon, maybe by

> Friday.

>

> Thanks for any feed back..

> Dawn in NJ

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

So if I remember correctly, 2 pro-EFA is = to 1/2 tsp, right? Then we are

giving my son the equivalent of 2 pro-EFA 3 times a day. Consider adding an

additional 2 pro-EFAs in the AM...see what happens, and in a few weeks add

an additional EPA to this if you want. Alternatively if you see a surge

just with twice a day EFA, try bumping to 3 times a day and give it a few

weeks. This may do absolutely nothing - but if this turns out to be a better

way to dose it - good to know for everyone using it. But I have no personal

experience with the EPA and don't know if giving it multiple times would

help. We were planning to add this before we increased his dose any further.

I'm trying to do just one thing at a time to figure out what is and isn't

helping. Since we just started with a new OT and are giving the

brushing/joint compression a try...it will be a few weeks/months before we

change anything else. Carnaware is also on my list of things to add in time.

My son anounced " daddy's ome " this evening...a beautiful thing. He's coming

up with new 2-word phrases without us prompting him. Really great. -C

[ ] question

>

>

> (and anyone that can help)

> Here are a few questions I've come up with recently regarding the

Pro-

> EFA's

> 1) Do your children act as if they " crave " the fish oil?

(Constantly

> asking for it, even after giving them their daily dose)

>

> 2) How long does it last in their system?

>

> 3) How much do you give to your kids or yourself?

>

> 4) Should adults or older children start out on the smallest dosage

> first (one capsule a day for 6mths) Or can we do 2 to start, then

add

> the Pro-EPA after the initial 6mths?

>

> My daughter, Abby who is now 4.7 has always craved her " fish juice "

> she started the regiment by spoon almost a year and half ago, and

> just this past summer, can now bite them and suck the juice out

dry.

>

> She has always asked for more, always seemed to crave them. About 2

> weeks ago, she succeeded in getting more then her usual dose. I had

> given her 2 capsules in the early am as usual. Later that day

while I

> was cleaning, she got to the bottle, took 2 out, came to me and

> showed me that she had 2 in her mouth. I immediately talked to her

> about the dangers of climbing up on the chair, to the cabinet, how

> she isn't supposed touch the fish juice w/out Mommy, etc etc..

> Well she had sneaked them again several hours later. Needless to

say

> I was horrified.

>

> I new she wasnt allergic to the fish, or iodine. Considering she

had

> been on them for a year and half. However, she had never taken 6 in

> one day. I called a friend who gives her children the EFA'S, as

> well as my dr. Both had said to just watch, and the " worst case "

was

> a speech surge. I then closely watched and made observations.

> The effects were incredible.

>

> 1)more clarity in speech

> 2)more consistency in speech

> 3)more words (although some of the new words weren't as clear as

some

> of the " older " words)

> 4)less frustration in communication, and self help skills.

> 5)able to multi-task (jump on the trampoline and say the ABC's,

count

> 1-10)

> 6)some sleep disturbance

> 7)increased activity level/impulsiveness

>

> We finished off the bottle that week (2 capsules a day) The effects

> were still the same however. Unfortunately, I

> couldn't reorder for about a week. My new order came yesterday. I

> started yesterday afternoon. 2 EFA's, 1 EPA. She went to bed at

8pm.

> Awake from 2-5am. And woke up at 6:45. She took her new regiment

dose

> before she went to school at 7:30am, I can't wait to see the

results

> of this new regiment. I'm hoping to see results soon, maybe by

> Friday.

>

> Thanks for any feed back..

> Dawn in NJ

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

>

> I don't understand something. Cancer seems to be the hardest disease

> of all to cure for mainstream medicine. But Hulda does it in a

> matter of days...weeks at most. Why is it that so many people are

> using her zappers and herbal/supplement regimens for months/years for

> far less serious problems than cancer?

>

Cancer is a money maker. The doctors, nurses, lab techs, hospitals,

organizations that require a lot of money to administer the fund

raisers, medicines ect. It all adds up to jobs and making money. Look

up how much the ceo of american cancer org earned last year.

There is no money to be made in alternative medicine because once it

works you don't have to come back for more treatments.

So many people are using the zappers for less serious problems so they

have better overall health and their bodies never get to the point of

having cancer. So what is cancer? Read the books and you'll find

it's a build up of parasites in the body.

Cheers,

LAS

[Guest guest]

>

> Hi!

> I'm new to your list. Does anyone on it have chronic lymphocytic

> leukemia?

> Thanks,

> Ellen

>

try http://www.clltopics.org/

and www.grouppekurosawa.com

joe

[Guest guest]

Dave,

I adopted my children so I'm almost in the same shoes as your wife,

my son was 9 months (he's the one with AS) my daughter had just

turned two...the only thing I can say is patience is the key...there

have been many times that all three of us have been sitting in the

floor crying together..! I have finally understood that my

son's " make up " is different...his brain is wired differently, so

consequenses for actions may not mean anything. What does work for

us anyway is noticing little " right things " he does...when he does

do what I ask I quickly say " wow nicholas thanks for doing what

mommy said! I'm so proud of you! " But when I try to diciplin the bad

when it's happening it only escilates and gets worse. After he's

calm I talk to him and ask him how he thinks he could have done

better...he USUALY understands and will tell me. Consistancy and

patience is the key. You also have to explain to the other

children,about the situation so they dont' feel slighted. My

daughter has to be reminded her brother's brain thinks differently,

so we have to do what's best for him. I hope I've been of some help.

By the way I appologise about the spelling!

>

> Hello,

> Dave here north of Seattle WA area. It has been a while since I

last

> posted. For those that are new and the people who don't remember,

We

> (Kim and I) live together with two children each from our previous

> marriages. We both have full custody of our children. The

biological

> mother of my 9 yr old daughter, Janell, and 6 yr old son, Trent,

(both

> AS diagnosed) is mostly not involved. Kim is struggling as a step-

mom

> in dealing with my children when it comes to discipline issues

when

> the children don't respond to consequences of actions or

explanations

> of wrong or bad decisions. Can anyone help with some suggestions

and

> or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

>

> Dave n Kim

>

[Guest guest]

--- davemarineveteran <davemarineveteran@...>

wrote:

> Can anyone help with

> some suggestions and

> or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

>

> Dave n Kim

>

Dave, (and Kim)

I wish I had some cure-all magic answer to your

question. Even for the moms (and dads) here, step or

otherwise, it's difficult. It's all trial and error,

and every kid is different. Sometimes it can be simply

an incentive to help with behavior. Sometimes it's

taking away a privilege. Consistancy is the key. And

remembering that your child can't always help the way

they are behaving. Venting to the group is a great way

to cope! I know back when my son was struggling with

behaviors (even to the point of almost

hospitalization!), I was on here a lot asking for help

with a LOT of issues. And the group always had ideas

to help or something helpful.

I know reading Dr. Ross Greene's " The Explosive Child "

was a turning point for me. It helped me " pick my

battles " when dealing with my son. I didn't so much

follow the book, but it made me look at how I

communicated with my son and I was able to really stop

and think of what was really something I needed for

him to stop doing or needed to behave in a certain

way. It doesn't come overnight. It's a lot of constant

reminding and telling them over and over and over and

over again how they should be behaving.

As for myself coping.... I go out to choir practice at

church for 2 hours every Tuesday. It is MY time. I am

not anyone's mom there or anyone's wife there. I am

just Melinda. It's a chance for me to do what I want

for once. And not have to play peace-maker! It was

hard for my husband and I to go out by ourselves

because so few could watch our son, and my mom was not

really supportive of helping us with him at times. But

now he prefers to stay home by himself, (he's 13), and

he has/knows our cell phone numbers to call. He does

so for the tiniest little thing, and it's probably

just his way of " checking in " when he gets

overwhelmed.

We still have a few rough days. (Mainly over washing

dishes!) But they are few and far between. So much

that I rarely have time to read posts anymore on the

group. I try to read, but I rarely get to post any

replies.

Let her know she's not alone. It is frustrating,

nerve-wracking, etc. There are days when I just go in

the bathroom to be able to have some time to " chill " .

Education is also a big thing. I don't know if you've

been introduced to the O.A.S.I.S website, but it's a

great tool as well.

Time, consistancy, boundaries and A LOT of patience is

good. I know I blow it now and again. I lose my cool

with him. He gets on my nerves at times. We've just

gone through his first round of exams. I am

soooooooooooooooo glad they are over with because the

anxiety it caused in him. He was so hyper and

obnoxious I could barely stand it! But I know it was

all from the stress of the exams, and that's how he

dealt with it.

Oh, and reward and praise as much as possible!!!!!!

's gotten to the point that he'll ask me if I'm

mad at him if he thinks he's done something that I

won't be happy with. He wanted a friend to come over

last weekend and spend the night because they had no

school because of the holiday. I told him he couldn't

because of the exams coming up and his needing to

study. They have this coming Monday off because of it

being a teacher workday, so I told him the friend

could come over and spend the night tomorrow night. He

wanted to rent a video game last week as well. I told

him that he couldn't because of his needing to study

for exams. And I promised him that I'd rent one this

weekend when his friend came over. So he had something

to " shoot " for and look forward to. We were to pick

the kids up if they were leaving early on Friday

because they only had one exam to take. And the minute

he got in the car he said, " Can we go rent a game? " I

was already prepared for his saying that and answered,

" YEP! " He was so excited. And not only did he get one

game, but I let him rent 2 for having to deal with

exams and getting through them! That was a major thing

for him, and he deserved to have a reward for all his

hard work. So he is content. Exams are over and he has

2 games, and his friend is comging tomorrow to spend

the night! Believe it or not, all that will go a long

way. When he has to face this again, he'll have this

experience to recall and realize that the work comes

first, but he will get rewarded once he's completed

it. That is what works for him. Each child is

different, and what might work for us, might now work

for another. It's mainly trial and error.

Tell Kim to take deep breaths and hold her own. Do

things for herself-even if it's just going out for ice

cream at Mc's with a friend for 30 min. She

needs to do thing for herself and have her own time to

cope. I live for Tuesday nights and choir. They are a

bunch of silly people and we have a great time. And I

don't have to think about home for the time I'm gone.

Tell her too, to hang in there. We've all been there.

Take one day at a time and see that it's an

accomplishment to get through each one at times. Tell

her to vent here or ask questions. This group is a

great source of encouragement and they are so willing

to help-even if it's just to listen.

Hang in there. We all know that it's tough.

Melinda

Mom to (13, AS, ADHD, OCD, depression)

Casey (11-going on 15! NT?)

(5-going on 10! and speech delayed)

[Guest guest]

Hi Dave--nice to meet you. I don't have any advice for you but noticed

you are from Seattle I'm 60 miles north of Seattle (Stanwood).

It's nice to see someone from our area!!

Holly

--6y

Bipolar

ASD

Anxiety

[Guest guest]

>

> Hello,

> Dave here north of Seattle WA area. It has been a while since I

last

> posted. For those that are new and the people who don't remember,

We

> (Kim and I) live together with two children each from our previous

> marriages. We both have full custody of our children. The

biological

> mother of my 9 yr old daughter, Janell, and 6 yr old son, Trent,

(both

> AS diagnosed) is mostly not involved. Kim is struggling as a step-

mom

> in dealing with my children when it comes to discipline issues when

> the children don't respond to consequences of actions or

explanations

> of wrong or bad decisions. Can anyone help with some suggestions

and

> or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

>

> Dave n Kim

>

Hi Dave and Kim, well done for trying so hard. Tell Kim not to take

it personally as your kids cant help it. I have AS and so do my 5

children, all at different levels. I was called pervasive recently

had Id of known what that meant I would of prob pushed the doc over

as it was an insult to me and my children, we react on injustice to

us. We do not see other peoples needs as we are just thinking all

the time about everything else. I We dont know we are ignoring you

as we did not register your request if we are thinking. as all other

sensory devices shut down to enable us to think more clearly. We

cannot read body language, so even if you were to be yawning at me I

would not take the hint you were board with me. Visual flash cards

are what you need as a family sit down and let him help design cards

to help him to communicate to you. Under stress our minds shut down

and our agitation takes over because we cannot proccess the

information being shouted at us. You need to find a way of

communicating thats all. Lots of singing and laughing a must. I hope

this helps

Chrissy Young

[Guest guest]

Chrissy, I soooo agree with you, visual aids are a must. Another thing that

helps tremedously is to have a schedule in a central location, I use a poster

board and write large so Jake can see it easily. Also on a poster board are

rules and expectations of behaviors. Aspies love rules, do not like to see them

be broken, so if it is written where they can sees it it is very effective. They

can also be offended if they see someone else " breaking the rules " . Even if it's

the parent, they expect us to also follow set rules. I have read several of your

posts Chrissy, and what a wonderful and helpful insight to have you on the

board, glad you are here!

Theresa

utilitychrissy <utilitychrissy@...> wrote:

>

> Hello,

> Dave here north of Seattle WA area. It has been a while since I

last

> posted. For those that are new and the people who don't remember,

We

> (Kim and I) live together with two children each from our previous

> marriages. We both have full custody of our children. The

biological

> mother of my 9 yr old daughter, Janell, and 6 yr old son, Trent,

(both

> AS diagnosed) is mostly not involved. Kim is struggling as a step-

mom

> in dealing with my children when it comes to discipline issues when

> the children don't respond to consequences of actions or

explanations

> of wrong or bad decisions. Can anyone help with some suggestions

and

> or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

>

> Dave n Kim

>

Hi Dave and Kim, well done for trying so hard. Tell Kim not to take

it personally as your kids cant help it. I have AS and so do my 5

children, all at different levels. I was called pervasive recently

had Id of known what that meant I would of prob pushed the doc over

as it was an insult to me and my children, we react on injustice to

us. We do not see other peoples needs as we are just thinking all

the time about everything else. I We dont know we are ignoring you

as we did not register your request if we are thinking. as all other

sensory devices shut down to enable us to think more clearly. We

cannot read body language, so even if you were to be yawning at me I

would not take the hint you were board with me. Visual flash cards

are what you need as a family sit down and let him help design cards

to help him to communicate to you. Under stress our minds shut down

and our agitation takes over because we cannot proccess the

information being shouted at us. You need to find a way of

communicating thats all. Lots of singing and laughing a must. I hope

this helps

Chrissy Young

[Guest guest]

Hi Melinda my name is Vicky i am a stepmother of a

12yr. old that will be 13 in may. his mother is still

in the picture but we (Dan and i) have custody of him.

to tell you the truth we are about to give up. we live

in a small town in SW Kansas and the closest help is 4

hours away or 8 to Kansas city. we do not get much

help from the teacher and we have gone to a few

seminars that are available and dont cost an arm or

so. we take the info. back and talk to the teachers

but they blow us off. at this point cant be

left alone. he will eat everything in site except

fruit and veg. he has plug ed up the sink with a

towel and just watched the water run so we cant trust

him to be alone. his mother gets him for dinner on

wed. night and he looks forward to this so he

basically shuts down on wed. and asks everyone " what

day is this " over and over we answer him but to get

him to concentrate at school is worthless. she also

gets him every other weekend starting on Friday so

Fridays are the same he has a calendar so he knows

exactly when he goes. she also gets him 1 week out of

the month when this happens its 3 days be for he goes

to spend the week that he shuts down and when he comes

back its a week to get him back into the grove of

things and well its hard. we are so behind on what to

do for him and i (step mom ) feel i am the only one

trying. Dan is a police officer and works the night

shift so he sleeps most of the day the work 12 hr.

shifts he goes in a 5:30 pm. and s mom says

she doesn't understand why he thinks he doesn't have

any rules at her house, but tells us that no

one bothers him and he can be alone. we have a 5 yr.

old that adores his brother and that's a whole norther

story. i am hoping to find help for us to help our son

before its to late. his mother says he will live with

us for the rest of his life is so capable of

doing so much more he is SMART and can manipulate

anyone to do things for him and well that's another

story too. he just isn't trying anymore he has gone

back to doing things he did in 3rd grade now that he

is in middle school. i am truly worried because i do

lose my cool a lot lately and have to go outside a

scream or cry. well sorry for going on and on thanks

for sharing your life i know it has helped me already.

--- Hall Melinda <mlndhall@...> wrote:

>

>

> --- davemarineveteran <davemarineveteran@...>

> wrote:

>

> > Can anyone help with

> > some suggestions and

> > or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

> >

> > Dave n Kim

> >

>

>

> Dave, (and Kim)

>

> I wish I had some cure-all magic answer to your

> question. Even for the moms (and dads) here, step or

> otherwise, it's difficult. It's all trial and error,

> and every kid is different. Sometimes it can be

> simply

> an incentive to help with behavior. Sometimes it's

> taking away a privilege. Consistancy is the key. And

> remembering that your child can't always help the

> way

> they are behaving. Venting to the group is a great

> way

> to cope! I know back when my son was struggling with

> behaviors (even to the point of almost

> hospitalization!), I was on here a lot asking for

> help

> with a LOT of issues. And the group always had ideas

> to help or something helpful.

>

> I know reading Dr. Ross Greene's " The Explosive

> Child "

> was a turning point for me. It helped me " pick my

> battles " when dealing with my son. I didn't so much

> follow the book, but it made me look at how I

> communicated with my son and I was able to really

> stop

> and think of what was really something I needed for

> him to stop doing or needed to behave in a certain

> way. It doesn't come overnight. It's a lot of

> constant

> reminding and telling them over and over and over

> and

> over again how they should be behaving.

>

> As for myself coping.... I go out to choir practice

> at

> church for 2 hours every Tuesday. It is MY time. I

> am

> not anyone's mom there or anyone's wife there. I am

> just Melinda. It's a chance for me to do what I want

> for once. And not have to play peace-maker! It was

> hard for my husband and I to go out by ourselves

> because so few could watch our son, and my mom was

> not

> really supportive of helping us with him at times.

> But

> now he prefers to stay home by himself, (he's 13),

> and

> he has/knows our cell phone numbers to call. He does

> so for the tiniest little thing, and it's probably

> just his way of " checking in " when he gets

> overwhelmed.

>

> We still have a few rough days. (Mainly over washing

> dishes!) But they are few and far between. So much

> that I rarely have time to read posts anymore on the

> group. I try to read, but I rarely get to post any

> replies.

>

> Let her know she's not alone. It is frustrating,

> nerve-wracking, etc. There are days when I just go

> in

> the bathroom to be able to have some time to

> " chill " .

> Education is also a big thing. I don't know if

> you've

> been introduced to the O.A.S.I.S website, but it's a

> great tool as well.

>

> Time, consistancy, boundaries and A LOT of patience

> is

> good. I know I blow it now and again. I lose my cool

> with him. He gets on my nerves at times. We've just

> gone through his first round of exams. I am

> soooooooooooooooo glad they are over with because

> the

> anxiety it caused in him. He was so hyper and

> obnoxious I could barely stand it! But I know it was

> all from the stress of the exams, and that's how he

> dealt with it.

>

> Oh, and reward and praise as much as possible!!!!!!

> 's gotten to the point that he'll ask me if

> I'm

> mad at him if he thinks he's done something that I

> won't be happy with. He wanted a friend to come over

> last weekend and spend the night because they had no

> school because of the holiday. I told him he

> couldn't

> because of the exams coming up and his needing to

> study. They have this coming Monday off because of

> it

> being a teacher workday, so I told him the friend

> could come over and spend the night tomorrow night.

> He

> wanted to rent a video game last week as well. I

> told

> him that he couldn't because of his needing to study

> for exams. And I promised him that I'd rent one this

> weekend when his friend came over. So he had

> something

> to " shoot " for and look forward to. We were to pick

> the kids up if they were leaving early on Friday

> because they only had one exam to take. And the

> minute

> he got in the car he said, " Can we go rent a game? "

> I

> was already prepared for his saying that and

> answered,

> " YEP! " He was so excited. And not only did he get

> one

> game, but I let him rent 2 for having to deal with

> exams and getting through them! That was a major

> thing

> for him, and he deserved to have a reward for all

> his

> hard work. So he is content. Exams are over and he

> has

> 2 games, and his friend is comging tomorrow to spend

> the night! Believe it or not, all that will go a

> long

> way. When he has to face this again, he'll have this

> experience to recall and realize that the work comes

> first, but he will get rewarded once he's completed

> it. That is what works for him. Each child is

> different, and what might work for us, might now

> work

> for another. It's mainly trial and error.

>

> Tell Kim to take deep breaths and hold her own. Do

> things for herself-even if it's just going out for

> ice

> cream at Mc's with a friend for 30 min. She

> needs to do thing for herself and have her own time

> to

> cope. I live for Tuesday nights and choir. They are

> a

> bunch of silly people and we have a great time. And

> I

> don't have to think about home for the time I'm

> gone.

>

> Tell her too, to hang in there. We've all been

> there.

> Take one day at a time and see that it's an

> accomplishment to get through each one at times.

> Tell

> her to vent here or ask questions. This group is a

> great source of encouragement and they are so

> willing

> to help-even if it's just to listen.

>

> Hang in there. We all know that it's tough.

>

> Melinda

> Mom to (13, AS, ADHD, OCD, depression)

> Casey (11-going on 15! NT?)

> (5-going on 10! and speech delayed)

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Vicki,

I feel your pain!!!! I too can see how lesser people would become

drunks!!! (just kidding...sort of) haha! Anyway, has he been

officially diagnosed? If so then his school is required by law, to

provide OT PT Speech...and special ed. REQUIRED...if they do not

comply or blow you off you can sue them! This is a disability, and

is covered under the disabilities act, and the " no child left

behind " theory...Contact someone in social services, they will point

you in the correct direction. You are obviously the only one that

will be an advocate for your step son, so you have to MAKE them

listen, if it takes a lawsuit then so be it...and you'll not only be

helping him but others who come along after him. Any good

ocupational therapist will help with things to do at home...rules

bounderies, and suggestions. Also maybe the OT can explain things

to the biological mom, so you're all on the same page.

I sure hope I've helped some.

Take care!!!!

> >

> > > Can anyone help with

> > > some suggestions and

> > > or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

> > >

> > > Dave n Kim

> > >

> >

> >

> > Dave, (and Kim)

> >

> > I wish I had some cure-all magic answer to your

> > question. Even for the moms (and dads) here, step or

> > otherwise, it's difficult. It's all trial and error,

> > and every kid is different. Sometimes it can be

> > simply

> > an incentive to help with behavior. Sometimes it's

> > taking away a privilege. Consistancy is the key. And

> > remembering that your child can't always help the

> > way

> > they are behaving. Venting to the group is a great

> > way

> > to cope! I know back when my son was struggling with

> > behaviors (even to the point of almost

> > hospitalization!), I was on here a lot asking for

> > help

> > with a LOT of issues. And the group always had ideas

> > to help or something helpful.

> >

> > I know reading Dr. Ross Greene's " The Explosive

> > Child "

> > was a turning point for me. It helped me " pick my

> > battles " when dealing with my son. I didn't so much

> > follow the book, but it made me look at how I

> > communicated with my son and I was able to really

> > stop

> > and think of what was really something I needed for

> > him to stop doing or needed to behave in a certain

> > way. It doesn't come overnight. It's a lot of

> > constant

> > reminding and telling them over and over and over

> > and

> > over again how they should be behaving.

> >

> > As for myself coping.... I go out to choir practice

> > at

> > church for 2 hours every Tuesday. It is MY time. I

> > am

> > not anyone's mom there or anyone's wife there. I am

> > just Melinda. It's a chance for me to do what I want

> > for once. And not have to play peace-maker! It was

> > hard for my husband and I to go out by ourselves

> > because so few could watch our son, and my mom was

> > not

> > really supportive of helping us with him at times.

> > But

> > now he prefers to stay home by himself, (he's 13),

> > and

> > he has/knows our cell phone numbers to call. He does

> > so for the tiniest little thing, and it's probably

> > just his way of " checking in " when he gets

> > overwhelmed.

> >

> > We still have a few rough days. (Mainly over washing

> > dishes!) But they are few and far between. So much

> > that I rarely have time to read posts anymore on the

> > group. I try to read, but I rarely get to post any

> > replies.

> >

> > Let her know she's not alone. It is frustrating,

> > nerve-wracking, etc. There are days when I just go

> > in

> > the bathroom to be able to have some time to

> > " chill " .

> > Education is also a big thing. I don't know if

> > you've

> > been introduced to the O.A.S.I.S website, but it's a

> > great tool as well.

> >

> > Time, consistancy, boundaries and A LOT of patience

> > is

> > good. I know I blow it now and again. I lose my cool

> > with him. He gets on my nerves at times. We've just

> > gone through his first round of exams. I am

> > soooooooooooooooo glad they are over with because

> > the

> > anxiety it caused in him. He was so hyper and

> > obnoxious I could barely stand it! But I know it was

> > all from the stress of the exams, and that's how he

> > dealt with it.

> >

> > Oh, and reward and praise as much as possible!!!!!!

> > 's gotten to the point that he'll ask me if

> > I'm

> > mad at him if he thinks he's done something that I

> > won't be happy with. He wanted a friend to come over

> > last weekend and spend the night because they had no

> > school because of the holiday. I told him he

> > couldn't

> > because of the exams coming up and his needing to

> > study. They have this coming Monday off because of

> > it

> > being a teacher workday, so I told him the friend

> > could come over and spend the night tomorrow night.

> > He

> > wanted to rent a video game last week as well. I

> > told

> > him that he couldn't because of his needing to study

> > for exams. And I promised him that I'd rent one this

> > weekend when his friend came over. So he had

> > something

> > to " shoot " for and look forward to. We were to pick

> > the kids up if they were leaving early on Friday

> > because they only had one exam to take. And the

> > minute

> > he got in the car he said, " Can we go rent a game? "

> > I

> > was already prepared for his saying that and

> > answered,

> > " YEP! " He was so excited. And not only did he get

> > one

> > game, but I let him rent 2 for having to deal with

> > exams and getting through them! That was a major

> > thing

> > for him, and he deserved to have a reward for all

> > his

> > hard work. So he is content. Exams are over and he

> > has

> > 2 games, and his friend is comging tomorrow to spend

> > the night! Believe it or not, all that will go a

> > long

> > way. When he has to face this again, he'll have this

> > experience to recall and realize that the work comes

> > first, but he will get rewarded once he's completed

> > it. That is what works for him. Each child is

> > different, and what might work for us, might now

> > work

> > for another. It's mainly trial and error.

> >

> > Tell Kim to take deep breaths and hold her own. Do

> > things for herself-even if it's just going out for

> > ice

> > cream at Mc's with a friend for 30 min. She

> > needs to do thing for herself and have her own time

> > to

> > cope. I live for Tuesday nights and choir. They are

> > a

> > bunch of silly people and we have a great time. And

> > I

> > don't have to think about home for the time I'm

> > gone.

> >

> > Tell her too, to hang in there. We've all been

> > there.

> > Take one day at a time and see that it's an

> > accomplishment to get through each one at times.

> > Tell

> > her to vent here or ask questions. This group is a

> > great source of encouragement and they are so

> > willing

> > to help-even if it's just to listen.

> >

> > Hang in there. We all know that it's tough.

> >

> > Melinda

> > Mom to (13, AS, ADHD, OCD, depression)

> > Casey (11-going on 15! NT?)

> > (5-going on 10! and speech delayed)

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

> >

> > > Can anyone help with

> > > some suggestions and

> > > or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

> > >

> > > Dave n Kim

> > >

> >

> >

> > Dave, (and Kim)

> >

> > I wish I had some cure-all magic answer to your

> > question. Even for the moms (and dads) here, step or

> > otherwise, it's difficult. It's all trial and error,

> > and every kid is different. Sometimes it can be

> > simply

> > an incentive to help with behavior. Sometimes it's

> > taking away a privilege. Consistancy is the key. And

> > remembering that your child can't always help the

> > way

> > they are behaving. Venting to the group is a great

> > way

> > to cope! I know back when my son was struggling with

> > behaviors (even to the point of almost

> > hospitalization!), I was on here a lot asking for

> > help

> > with a LOT of issues. And the group always had ideas

> > to help or something helpful.

> >

> > I know reading Dr. Ross Greene's " The Explosive

> > Child "

> > was a turning point for me. It helped me " pick my

> > battles " when dealing with my son. I didn't so much

> > follow the book, but it made me look at how I

> > communicated with my son and I was able to really

> > stop

> > and think of what was really something I needed for

> > him to stop doing or needed to behave in a certain

> > way. It doesn't come overnight. It's a lot of

> > constant

> > reminding and telling them over and over and over

> > and

> > over again how they should be behaving.

> >

> > As for myself coping.... I go out to choir practice

> > at

> > church for 2 hours every Tuesday. It is MY time. I

> > am

> > not anyone's mom there or anyone's wife there. I am

> > just Melinda. It's a chance for me to do what I want

> > for once. And not have to play peace-maker! It was

> > hard for my husband and I to go out by ourselves

> > because so few could watch our son, and my mom was

> > not

> > really supportive of helping us with him at times.

> > But

> > now he prefers to stay home by himself, (he's 13),

> > and

> > he has/knows our cell phone numbers to call. He does

> > so for the tiniest little thing, and it's probably

> > just his way of " checking in " when he gets

> > overwhelmed.

> >

> > We still have a few rough days. (Mainly over washing

> > dishes!) But they are few and far between. So much

> > that I rarely have time to read posts anymore on the

> > group. I try to read, but I rarely get to post any

> > replies.

> >

> > Let her know she's not alone. It is frustrating,

> > nerve-wracking, etc. There are days when I just go

> > in

> > the bathroom to be able to have some time to

> > " chill " .

> > Education is also a big thing. I don't know if

> > you've

> > been introduced to the O.A.S.I.S website, but it's a

> > great tool as well.

> >

> > Time, consistancy, boundaries and A LOT of patience

> > is

> > good. I know I blow it now and again. I lose my cool

> > with him. He gets on my nerves at times. We've just

> > gone through his first round of exams. I am

> > soooooooooooooooo glad they are over with because

> > the

> > anxiety it caused in him. He was so hyper and

> > obnoxious I could barely stand it! But I know it was

> > all from the stress of the exams, and that's how he

> > dealt with it.

> >

> > Oh, and reward and praise as much as possible!!!!!!

> > 's gotten to the point that he'll ask me if

> > I'm

> > mad at him if he thinks he's done something that I

> > won't be happy with. He wanted a friend to come over

> > last weekend and spend the night because they had no

> > school because of the holiday. I told him he

> > couldn't

> > because of the exams coming up and his needing to

> > study. They have this coming Monday off because of

> > it

> > being a teacher workday, so I told him the friend

> > could come over and spend the night tomorrow night.

> > He

> > wanted to rent a video game last week as well. I

> > told

> > him that he couldn't because of his needing to study

> > for exams. And I promised him that I'd rent one this

> > weekend when his friend came over. So he had

> > something

> > to " shoot " for and look forward to. We were to pick

> > the kids up if they were leaving early on Friday

> > because they only had one exam to take. And the

> > minute

> > he got in the car he said, " Can we go rent a game? "

> > I

> > was already prepared for his saying that and

> > answered,

> > " YEP! " He was so excited. And not only did he get

> > one

> > game, but I let him rent 2 for having to deal with

> > exams and getting through them! That was a major

> > thing

> > for him, and he deserved to have a reward for all

> > his

> > hard work. So he is content. Exams are over and he

> > has

> > 2 games, and his friend is comging tomorrow to spend

> > the night! Believe it or not, all that will go a

> > long

> > way. When he has to face this again, he'll have this

> > experience to recall and realize that the work comes

> > first, but he will get rewarded once he's completed

> > it. That is what works for him. Each child is

> > different, and what might work for us, might now

> > work

> > for another. It's mainly trial and error.

> >

> > Tell Kim to take deep breaths and hold her own. Do

> > things for herself-even if it's just going out for

> > ice

> > cream at Mc's with a friend for 30 min. She

> > needs to do thing for herself and have her own time

> > to

> > cope. I live for Tuesday nights and choir. They are

> > a

> > bunch of silly people and we have a great time. And

> > I

> > don't have to think about home for the time I'm

> > gone.

> >

> > Tell her too, to hang in there. We've all been

> > there.

> > Take one day at a time and see that it's an

> > accomplishment to get through each one at times.

> > Tell

> > her to vent here or ask questions. This group is a

> > great source of encouragement and they are so

> > willing

> > to help-even if it's just to listen.

> >

> > Hang in there. We all know that it's tough.

> >

> > Melinda

> > Mom to (13, AS, ADHD, OCD, depression)

> > Casey (11-going on 15! NT?)

> > (5-going on 10! and speech delayed)

> >

> >

> >

>

Hi Vicky, my name is chrissy and well done you for caring enough to

look after someone else child. I am so glad for this boys sake his

mother is still able to at least have a connection with him.

PLEEEEEEEEEEEASE dont give up I DO KNOW HOW YOU FEEL I have 5

children all with AS I have AS I did not know this was what

the " PROBLEM (NOT) " was, so i was pulling my hair out and going into

the garden and running around it (Laughing) I also have it so you can

imagine how tough it is, how can I get them to conform and remember

and do all these things " EXPECTED (CANT DO IT) " and I am A fellow

ASPIE well the good news is because of all my training and my focus

on the world have managed to keep hold of my kids and train them my

way as its been the only way I know. Knowing I have this AS HFA has

changed my life overnight, I know whats happening in my BRAIN why I

cant proccess the information the same way as others, its like all my

life I have struggled to communicate only you arnt aware your not

communicating the same or not listening or hearing the same as

others. So we go aqlong not knowing wahts wrong, its like you have

the problem not us because why cant you understand me only thoes

words cant actually come out of your mouth, in fact you may even

think you have said exactly that but not moved your lips. It is

totaly complex IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT YOU AND YOUR CHILD YOUR CARING

FOR ARE FRUSTRATED AND CRYING IS ALLOWED Give yourself a pat on the

back for bothering to find the answers many do not. Do whatever it

is that gets you up and dancing be yourself shake it all out sweat a

bit, deep breaths, ready for the next day. xxxxx

Chrissy Young

[Guest guest]

Eats everything in sight...... ?Prader-Willi Syndrome

Re: ( ) Question

Hi Melinda my name is Vicky i am a stepmother of a

12yr. old that will be 13 in may. his mother is still

in the picture but we (Dan and i) have custody of him.

to tell you the truth we are about to give up. we live

in a small town in SW Kansas and the closest help is 4

hours away or 8 to Kansas city. we do not get much

help from the teacher and we have gone to a few

seminars that are available and dont cost an arm or

so. we take the info. back and talk to the teachers

but they blow us off. at this point cant be

left alone. he will eat everything in site except

fruit and veg. he has plug ed up the sink with a

towel and just watched the water run so we cant trust

him to be alone. his mother gets him for dinner on

wed. night and he looks forward to this so he

basically shuts down on wed. and asks everyone " what

day is this " over and over we answer him but to get

him to concentrate at school is worthless. she also

gets him every other weekend starting on Friday so

Fridays are the same he has a calendar so he knows

exactly when he goes. she also gets him 1 week out of

the month when this happens its 3 days be for he goes

to spend the week that he shuts down and when he comes

back its a week to get him back into the grove of

things and well its hard. we are so behind on what to

do for him and i (step mom ) feel i am the only one

trying. Dan is a police officer and works the night

shift so he sleeps most of the day the work 12 hr.

shifts he goes in a 5:30 pm. and s mom says

she doesn't understand why he thinks he doesn't have

any rules at her house, but tells us that no

one bothers him and he can be alone. we have a 5 yr.

old that adores his brother and that's a whole norther

story. i am hoping to find help for us to help our son

before its to late. his mother says he will live with

us for the rest of his life is so capable of

doing so much more he is SMART and can manipulate

anyone to do things for him and well that's another

story too. he just isn't trying anymore he has gone

back to doing things he did in 3rd grade now that he

is in middle school. i am truly worried because i do

lose my cool a lot lately and have to go outside a

scream or cry. well sorry for going on and on thanks

for sharing your life i know it has helped me already.

--- Hall Melinda <mlndhall@...> wrote:

>

>

> --- davemarineveteran <davemarineveteran@...>

> wrote:

>

> > Can anyone help with

> > some suggestions and

> > or ideas for strategies for coping for Kim?

> >

> > Dave n Kim

> >

>

>

> Dave, (and Kim)

>

> I wish I had some cure-all magic answer to your

> question. Even for the moms (and dads) here, step or

> otherwise, it's difficult. It's all trial and error,

> and every kid is different. Sometimes it can be

> simply

> an incentive to help with behavior. Sometimes it's

> taking away a privilege. Consistancy is the key. And

> remembering that your child can't always help the

> way

> they are behaving. Venting to the group is a great

> way

> to cope! I know back when my son was struggling with

> behaviors (even to the point of almost

> hospitalization!), I was on here a lot asking for

> help

> with a LOT of issues. And the group always had ideas

> to help or something helpful.

>

> I know reading Dr. Ross Greene's " The Explosive

> Child "

> was a turning point for me. It helped me " pick my

> battles " when dealing with my son. I didn't so much

> follow the book, but it made me look at how I

> communicated with my son and I was able to really

> stop

> and think of what was really something I needed for

> him to stop doing or needed to behave in a certain

> way. It doesn't come overnight. It's a lot of

> constant

> reminding and telling them over and over and over

> and

> over again how they should be behaving.

>

> As for myself coping.... I go out to choir practice

> at

> church for 2 hours every Tuesday. It is MY time. I

> am

> not anyone's mom there or anyone's wife there. I am

> just Melinda. It's a chance for me to do what I want

> for once. And not have to play peace-maker! It was

> hard for my husband and I to go out by ourselves

> because so few could watch our son, and my mom was

> not

> really supportive of helping us with him at times.

> But

> now he prefers to stay home by himself, (he's 13),

> and

> he has/knows our cell phone numbers to call. He does

> so for the tiniest little thing, and it's probably

> just his way of " checking in " when he gets

> overwhelmed.

>

> We still have a few rough days. (Mainly over washing

> dishes!) But they are few and far between. So much

> that I rarely have time to read posts anymore on the

> group. I try to read, but I rarely get to post any

> replies.

>

> Let her know she's not alone. It is frustrating,

> nerve-wracking, etc. There are days when I just go

> in

> the bathroom to be able to have some time to

> " chill " .

> Education is also a big thing. I don't know if

> you've

> been introduced to the O.A.S.I.S website, but it's a

> great tool as well.

>

> Time, consistancy, boundaries and A LOT of patience

> is

> good. I know I blow it now and again. I lose my cool

> with him. He gets on my nerves at times. We've just

> gone through his first round of exams. I am

> soooooooooooooooo glad they are over with because

> the

> anxiety it caused in him. He was so hyper and

> obnoxious I could barely stand it! But I know it was

> all from the stress of the exams, and that's how he

> dealt with it.

>

> Oh, and reward and praise as much as possible!!!!!!

> 's gotten to the point that he'll ask me if

> I'm

> mad at him if he thinks he's done something that I

> won't be happy with. He wanted a friend to come over

> last weekend and spend the night because they had no

> school because of the holiday. I told him he

> couldn't

> because of the exams coming up and his needing to

> study. They have this coming Monday off because of

> it

> being a teacher workday, so I told him the friend

> could come over and spend the night tomorrow night.

> He

> wanted to rent a video game last week as well. I

> told

> him that he couldn't because of his needing to study

> for exams. And I promised him that I'd rent one this

> weekend when his friend came over. So he had

> something

> to " shoot " for and look forward to. We were to pick

> the kids up if they were leaving early on Friday

> because they only had one exam to take. And the

> minute

> he got in the car he said, " Can we go rent a game? "

> I

> was already prepared for his saying that and

> answered,

> " YEP! " He was so excited. And not only did he get

> one

> game, but I let him rent 2 for having to deal with

> exams and getting through them! That was a major

> thing

> for him, and he deserved to have a reward for all

> his

> hard work. So he is content. Exams are over and he

> has

> 2 games, and his friend is comging tomorrow to spend

> the night! Believe it or not, all that will go a

> long

> way. When he has to face this again, he'll have this

> experience to recall and realize that the work comes

> first, but he will get rewarded once he's completed

> it. That is what works for him. Each child is

> different, and what might work for us, might now

> work

> for another. It's mainly trial and error.

>

> Tell Kim to take deep breaths and hold her own. Do

> things for herself-even if it's just going out for

> ice

> cream at Mc's with a friend for 30 min. She

> needs to do thing for herself and have her own time

> to

> cope. I live for Tuesday nights and choir. They are

> a

> bunch of silly people and we have a great time. And

> I

> don't have to think about home for the time I'm

> gone.

>

> Tell her too, to hang in there. We've all been

> there.

> Take one day at a time and see that it's an

> accomplishment to get through each one at times.

> Tell

> her to vent here or ask questions. This group is a

> great source of encouragement and they are so

> willing

> to help-even if it's just to listen.

>

> Hang in there. We all know that it's tough.

>

> Melinda

> Mom to (13, AS, ADHD, OCD, depression)

> Casey (11-going on 15! NT?)

> (5-going on 10! and speech delayed)

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Dave and Kim,

I see you've gotten lots of ideas already. But am wondering in what

area the discipline is needed.

Household chores, homework time, hygiene, hearing " no " if they want

to go do something (play, video/computer time...), not getting along

with each other.... Just thinking we might can give some specific

ideas/suggestions if we knew some examples.

Tell Kim to find a bit of time for herself to relax and that the

kids aren't doing all this on purpose, which I'm sure she knows. Do

they have a daily routine/structure at home? Some AS kids really

need this, but luckily my son does pretty well without this (he's

17).

>

> Hello,

> Dave here north of Seattle WA area. It has been a while since I

last

> posted. For those that are new and the people who don't remember,

We

> (Kim and I) live together with two children each from our previous

> marriages. We both have full custody of our children. The

biological

[Guest guest]

>

> Eats everything in sight...... ?Prader-Willi Syndrome

> ----- Original Message -----

>

Not necessarily. My oldest son has severe ADHD and tends to

perseverate on food. A friend has a daughter with HFA who tends to

perseverate on food as well. We have both considered pantry locks for

this reason.

[Guest guest]

Every lab is different so the best way to tell if your doing good it to have

your Total and Free T levels in the upper 1/3 of your labs range or higher for a

young man. Also keep your E2 Estradiol down between 10 to 30 best at 20 for any

age man. Here it is all in this link.

http://www.lef.org/protocols/prtcls-txt/t-prtcl-130.html

Phil

chickenbirdtree <chickenbirdtree@...> wrote:

I notice that the basics are different from different labs

I thought normal levels for Free T is Ref. 8 - 35pg/ml and

all Total levels are around Ref 300 - 800 ng/dl Am I wrong

about these readings?

[Guest guest]

Hi, sorry if I am not responding correctly, but I cannot find the

original thread:

Inability to control food consumption can also arise with medication

use. I know that while my daughter was on Risperdal, she ate

uncontrollably. If one left out a tray - of cheese, for instance, at

Christmas - and we took our eyes off her, the whole thing would be

gone! Also, some kids with genetic disorders - i.e. chromosome

abberations besides Prader-Willi - can have difficulty understanding

internal regulators such as pain or the feeling of being satisfied.

> >

> > Eats everything in sight...... ?Prader-Willi Syndrome

> > ----- Original Message -----

> >

>

> Not necessarily. My oldest son has severe ADHD and tends to

> perseverate on food. A friend has a daughter with HFA who tends to

> perseverate on food as well. We have both considered pantry locks

for

> this reason.

>

[Guest guest]

Holly,

Kim here. Dave and I live in Bow, which is north of Burlington. I have felt

totally alone raising aspies. I am the mother of 4, which the jump from 2 to 4

kids (blended family) actually made me better as a mother. My aspies are not my

biological kids which I really don't know if it makes a difference or not.

Sometimes I feel like I am at a disadvantage because I didn't get to bond with

them as infants. I've been raising them since Trent was 2 and Janell was 5. As

you may have read from the post, our aspies are 9 and 6. Trent is the 6yo that

we have an especially hard time with. Last Friday was a very bad day. He was

told to " move his clothes pin " on the behavior chart at school three different

times, which would have resulted in him having to call home. He never did move

the pin so his teacher sent a behavior notice home with him, which he hid in the

classroom before leaving on Friday. Needless to say, Monday was a NO recess

day. He is habitually lying both at home and in

the classroom. I'm worn out. I don't know what else to do. He doesn't learn

from consequences of his actions nor does he learn from someone explaining why

he shouldn't lie, break rules, etc. Sorry to ramble on, I intended just to

introduce myself and clarify our location. If your interested in continuing to

email, I sure would appreciate the " local " emails too. It makes me feel less

alone in this journey in parenthood.

Holly <hollym3k@...> wrote:

Hi Dave--nice to meet you. I don't have any advice for you but noticed

you are from Seattle I'm 60 miles north of Seattle (Stanwood).

It's nice to see someone from our area!!

Holly

--6y

Bipolar

ASD

Anxiety

[Guest guest]

I have noticed that the VA sends results from different labs. Then I would

guess

what you are saying that I should be in the upper 1/3 for any lab test on

total T, and E2 would be around 20 for any lab too. I am 82 remember but I

can't reach a climax yet and have no " wood " in the mornings now for a year. I

am going to have

my lab test of E2 Monday, is there anything else that I should have tested at

that

time Phil besides free T ? I told you that I am taking 175ng/dl every two

weeks in the butt. I am going to try doing my own shots in the thigh but I will

have to get instuctions from my daughter on that once a week as you suggested.

On half of the 175ng

Thanks,

Roy

philip georgian <pmgamer18@...> wrote:

Every lab is different so the best way to tell if your doing good it to have

your Total and Free T levels in the upper 1/3 of your labs range or higher for a

young man. Also keep your E2 Estradiol down between 10 to 30 best at 20 for any

age man. Here it is all in this link.

http://www.lef.org/protocols/prtcls-txt/t-prtcl-130.html

Phil

chickenbirdtree <chickenbirdtree@...> wrote:

I notice that the basics are different from different labs

I thought normal levels for Free T is Ref. 8 - 35pg/ml and

all Total levels are around Ref 300 - 800 ng/dl Am I wrong

about these readings?

[Guest guest]

Ellen:

I was diagnosed with CLL about 2 1/2 years ago.

>

> Hi!

> I'm new to your list. Does anyone on it have chronic lymphocytic

> leukemia?

> Thanks,

> Ellen

>

[Guest guest]

Yes Total and Free T, Total E and E2 Estradiol one like this.

http://www.labcorp.com/datasets/labcorp/html/chapter/mono/sr012000.htm

An E2 test for men.

Also get DHT and DHEA tested.

Your levels should be in the upper 1/3 of your labs range for a young man both

your Total and Free T. As for E2 10 to 30 best at 20 for any age man. If you

start to do your shots every week start at 100 mgs. a week. 175 ng/dl sounds

like a test result not a dose for a shot do you mean 175 mgs.

Phil

Roy <chickenbirdtree@...> wrote:

I have noticed that the VA sends results from different labs. Then I would

guess

what you are saying that I should be in the upper 1/3 for any lab test on total

T, and E2 would be around 20 for any lab too. I am 82 remember but I can't reach

a climax yet and have no " wood " in the mornings now for a year. I am going to

have

my lab test of E2 Monday, is there anything else that I should have tested at

that

time Phil besides free T ? I told you that I am taking 175ng/dl every two weeks

in the butt. I am going to try doing my own shots in the thigh but I will have

to get instuctions from my daughter on that once a week as you suggested. On

half of the 175ng

Thanks,

Roy

philip georgian

wrote:

Every lab is different so the best way to tell if your doing good it to have

your Total and Free T levels in the upper 1/3 of your labs range or higher for a

young man. Also keep your E2 Estradiol down between 10 to 30 best at 20 for any

age man. Here it is all in this link.

http://www.lef.org/protocols/prtcls-txt/t-prtcl-130.html

Phil

chickenbirdtree wrote:

I notice that the basics are different from different labs

I thought normal levels for Free T is Ref. 8 - 35pg/ml and

all Total levels are around Ref 300 - 800 ng/dl Am I wrong

about these readings?