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At 11:54 PM 3/1/05, Barb M wrote:

> - I suffer with that type of depression - I have been depressed

>for so many years that it is just a way of life - not a fun one - but a

>way of life. I take medication, Celexa, and I guess it does help - but

>there are times that things all seem so hopeless

Barb, I can totally relate to the way you're feeling as this is also my

situation. I didn't do anything about it even after I began to suspect,

some 30 years ago, that I was depressed. Why? I was still married and my

A.F. husband worried that if I saw a " shrink " it would reflect on his

record. It was only after my divorce about 12 years ago that I finally

worked up the courage to stammer out to my GP that I thought I was

depressed. I was lucky that it was an AF hospital that had psychiatrists on

the staff, got an appt, and was diagnosed as chronically depressed. They

started me on Zoloft, and after several increases in dosage I finally

started feeling " up " . I would find myself whistling around the house...it

was great. The problem was that the side effects of the med were miserable.

I had constant diarrhea and night sweats. I'd go through three t-shirts (my

jammies of choice) a night and was ruining my pillows and bed linens.

Finally I got changed to Prozac but then moved from the area...and access

to a military hospital...when I was still on the initial low dosage. Since

there were no private doctors around who belonged to the military Tristar

insurance program I was soon on no depression meds again. Tried SamE for

awhile and also St. 's Wort but neither worked.

It's only recently, after being dianosed with diabetes and the heart

problems that I've mentioned the depression again and now am on Lexapro,

which has been increased to 20mg just recently. I haven't experienced any

difference in the way I feel so far. There are times when I almost wish I'd

never experienced what it felt like to be " normal " back when I took zoloft.

Then I wouldn't know what I was missing by living my life a half-step

(maybe a full step now) below normal.

I'm thankful for this list for not only good information and encouragement

with diabetes but for the chance to vent or whine as well as for the chance

to see what others deal with.

sky

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Sky - thanks for writing - it is comforting to know that there are people that

can truly understand what it is like. I live with my ex out of necessity and all

in all it is not the worst situation in the world. He finally became aware that

I was a person and not a possession. But still, people say they understand and

try to comfort, but unless you have been there you do not know what it is like.

I hope you can get some meds that work. They do not make my world sunny but they

do make it " less gray "

Barb in NH

Barb, I can totally relate to the way you're feeling as this is also my

situation. I didn't do anything about it even after I began to suspect,

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Hi Barb,

There's a book written some time back called " Been Down So Long It Looks Like

Up To Me. " The minute I saw the title, I knew just what the author meant. ;-D

My guess is that I've been depressed to one degree or another all my life. It's

better now than it used to be, but the situation I'm in doesn't make for

feeling cheery.

I tried Prozac and it worked beautifully. Eventually though, I felt as though I

could wean myself off it, and I did. Things then went well for years, until the

next crisis I couldn't handle. My fibro got so bad that I screwed up my last

couple of bookings (I'm a graphic designer) due to having to take time off to

deal with pain and exhaustion.

After that I couldn't get work, and wouldn't have been able to do it if I had.

At that point I tried Prozac again, but for some reason it didn't work. Then I

tried Paxil, and for a while it helped. After a year or so, though, it seemed

to be increasing my anxiety/depression instead of reducing it. I stopped taking

it.

At the moment, I am taking the amino acid L-tryosine, 5-HTP, and rhodiola

rosea. They do help, but my finances are so bad that being able to pay for

supplements can be very iffy.

And I am " working " (when I can) for my ex-husband, so I experience every day

the stress of being dependent on someone who is not entirely my friend.

Hugs, Dianne

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So y'all are like Prince and Ferguson, LOL. Sue

>

> Sky - thanks for writing - it is comforting to know that there are

> people that can truly understand what it is like. I live with my ex

> out of necessity and all in all it is not the worst situation in the

> world. He finally became aware that I was a person and not a

> possession.

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At 01:04 PM 3/2/05, Barb M wrote:

>Sky - thanks for writing - it is comforting to know that there are people

>that can truly understand what it is like. I live with my ex out of

>necessity and all in all it is not the worst situation in the world. He

>finally became aware that I was a person and not a possession. But still,

>people say they understand and try to comfort, but unless you have been

>there you do not know what it is like. I hope you can get some meds that

>work. They do not make my world sunny but they do make it " less gray "

Thanks, Barb! There's still this " thing " with folks if you mention

depression or taking an anti-depressant. Like " well, just snap out of it! " .

Yeah.

sky

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In a message dated 3/2/2005 10:50:31 PM Eastern Standard Time,

skydancer9@... writes:

I don't quite understand what double depression is, though. Can you explain

more about that

Double depression is chronic depression coupled with an episode of major

depression. For me, I've gotten out of the worst of the major depression, more

or

less, but am still dealing with the chronic depression.

'

Stacey

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snip:

And I am " working " (when I can) for my ex-husband, so I experience every day

the stress of being dependent on someone who is not entirely my friend.

Hugs, Dianne

Dianne - I know that feeling, although my ex seems to be trying to be friends

- after 40 years of anger it is probably more stress that ease. But, financially

I have no choice. I am taking Celexa - just switched last year from Paxil - I

too felt like I was getting more depressed and anxious while taking Paxil.

Barb in NH

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Sue - not quite like them :) if I had her money I would be living by myself :)

Barb in NH

So y'all are like Prince and Ferguson, LOL. Sue

>

> Sky - thanks for writing - it is comforting to know that there are

> people that can truly understand what it is like. I live with my ex

> out of necessity and all in all it is not the worst situation in the

> world. He finally became aware that I was a person and not a

> possession.

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>Sky - thanks for writing - it is comforting to know that there are people

>that can truly understand what it is like. I live with my ex out of

>necessity and all in all it is not the worst situation in the world. He

>finally became aware that I was a person and not a possession. But still,

>people say they understand and try to comfort, but unless you have been

>there you do not know what it is like. I hope you can get some meds that

>work. They do not make my world sunny but they do make it " less gray "

Thanks, Barb! There's still this " thing " with folks if you mention

depression or taking an anti-depressant. Like " well, just snap out of it! " .

Yeah.

sky

Sky - I won't buy into that any more. I did for 30 years - never even told my

sister - too ashamed - etc. Now I look at taking anti-depressants as part of

taking care of myself - It is something I need. Depression is an illness the

same as diabetes is an illness and I am no less a person because I have an

emotional disorder. If only the rest of the world would stop looking at us like

we were freaks. Of course, the motion picture industry certainly does nothing to

help the image of someone with emotional problems. OK - am getting off my soap

box :)

Barb in NH

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--- Kore wrote:

> Since last June, I have been experiencing intense

> physical pain. As tough as it

> has been, it was much easier to deal with than

> severe depression. The pain

> affects my back and left leg, depression affects

> everything.

>

> Hugs, Dianne

I've suffered with clinical depression and I am now

dealing with the pain of two frozen shoulders on top

of PN and fibro...I'm not sure that statement is

accurate in my case...PN/Fibro/and frozen shoulders DO

affect EVERYTHING! Especially when the pain level

reaches a 10+ Liz

=====

Type II, dx'ed Dec 1998, insulin since 6/02(my choice), pumping since

8/03. On glucophage, and other meds. Have neuropathy, PCOS, RLS, ET,

Fibro, and asthma.

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At 10:24 PM 3/2/05, staceypmartin@... wrote:

>Me too.

>

>I suffer with and from and because of depression. Double depression, my

>shrink calls it - going back to my youth.

Yeah, looking back on my own teen years I know I must have been suffering

from depression then. I thought of suicide a lot in those days. It's hard

to remember much about childhood but it was telling, once, in a meditation

session when we were supposed to think of some happy childhood memory and I

couldn't think of one. 8-(

I don't quite understand what double depression is, though. Can you explain

more about that?

sky

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> It's hard

to remember much about childhood but it was telling, once, in a meditation

session when we were supposed to think of some happy childhood memory and I

couldn't think of one. 8-(

This sentence really made me think sky - I had wonderful loving parents but

happy childhood memories are difficult because I knew that " no one ever liked

me " - that type of inner feeling is not conducive to happy memories - always

felt left out. So maybe the docs are right - it does all go back to how you felt

as a child. Food for thought.

Barb in NH

ps - I guess depression is OT, but I am glad so many have felt comfortable

enough to share what is very painful personally.

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Depression is very definitely not OT, it is a complication of diabetes.

And other chronic illnesses.

Strangely enough, I didn't realize that until I agreed to participate in

a survey by my medical group. So many of the questions concerned

feelings, fears, frustrations (I could add another f word here, but I

won't.) that I suddenly realized the survey took for granted that my

condition included depression. After doing some research, I found many

people with chronic diseases, not just diabetes, suffer depression.

So you have this underlying depression and then other stuff comes along

and gets piled on top, or vice versa.

There are days that I am sorry I got out of bed. My lists are my

lifeline in that I both give and receive support. The biggest thing is

knowing that you are not alone and that other people know exactly how

you feel.

Helen

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Depression is very definitely not OT, it is a complication of diabetes.

And other chronic illnesses.

Strangely enough, I didn't realize that until I agreed to participate in

a survey by my medical group. So many of the questions concerned

feelings, fears, frustrations (I could add another f word here, but I

won't.) that I suddenly realized the survey took for granted that my

condition included depression. After doing some research, I found many

people with chronic diseases, not just diabetes, suffer depression.

So you have this underlying depression and then other stuff comes along

and gets piled on top, or vice versa.

There are days that I am sorry I got out of bed. My lists are my

lifeline in that I both give and receive support. The biggest thing is

knowing that you are not alone and that other people know exactly how

you feel.

Helen

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Vicki wrote

> In my work as a transcriptionist -- we also have a psychiatric unit --

> I've become aware that almost every patient -- I'd even eliminate the

> word " almost! -- who is alcoholic or drug addicted is chronically

> depressed. I'd even venture to say that the vast majority of our prison

> population are clinically depressed people.

> I'm not sure exactly what percentage of the population is chronically

> depressed but it must be substantial. Just off the top of my head, I'd

> say 25%. Bea, do you have some hard figures?

> Vicki, feeling extremely thankful and lucky to have chosen parents

> without depression or weight issues...>

The estimates of clinical depression vary from 3 to 17 percent depending on

the criteria.

A good resource is

http://counsellingresource.com/distress/mood-disorders/depression-informatio

n.html

http://tinyurl.com/566gz

Many people never seem to be in good spirits so others see them as

depressed, especially if they have a lot to contend with. However, these

people may not meet the criteria for clinical depression.

One book that addresses depression and diabetes is of course " Psyching Out

Diabetes : A Positive Approach to Your Negative Emotions " by L.

Rubin, June Biermann, Barbara Toohey

It's available from Amazon and other bookstores.

Bea

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Vicki wrote

> In my work as a transcriptionist -- we also have a psychiatric unit --

> I've become aware that almost every patient -- I'd even eliminate the

> word " almost! -- who is alcoholic or drug addicted is chronically

> depressed. I'd even venture to say that the vast majority of our prison

> population are clinically depressed people.

> I'm not sure exactly what percentage of the population is chronically

> depressed but it must be substantial. Just off the top of my head, I'd

> say 25%. Bea, do you have some hard figures?

> Vicki, feeling extremely thankful and lucky to have chosen parents

> without depression or weight issues...>

The estimates of clinical depression vary from 3 to 17 percent depending on

the criteria.

A good resource is

http://counsellingresource.com/distress/mood-disorders/depression-informatio

n.html

http://tinyurl.com/566gz

Many people never seem to be in good spirits so others see them as

depressed, especially if they have a lot to contend with. However, these

people may not meet the criteria for clinical depression.

One book that addresses depression and diabetes is of course " Psyching Out

Diabetes : A Positive Approach to Your Negative Emotions " by L.

Rubin, June Biermann, Barbara Toohey

It's available from Amazon and other bookstores.

Bea

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At 10:51 PM 3/2/05, staceypmartin@... wrote:

>Double depression is chronic depression coupled with an episode of major

>depression. For me, I've gotten out of the worst of the major depression,

>more or

>less, but am still dealing with the chronic depression.

Thanks, Stacey. I'm glad you're getting out of the worst of it, at least.

I've had times when I've felt more depressed than usual---sort of very blue

and cry a lot---but it was probably still not what would be defined as

major depression. Lately I've had almost no appetite and have been wanting

to sleep all of the time, but I don't detect any feeling of what I'd call

sadness or the blues. It's more like I just don't feel like doing anything

or dealing with anything. I wonder if it has anything to do with the

anti-depressant I'm taking because this lack of interest began right after

the cardiac cath procedure and that's about the time I started taking

Lexapro. Hmmm. Can an anti-depressant make you more depressed?

sky

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At 11:32 PM 3/2/05, Barb M wrote:

> This sentence really made me think sky - I had wonderful loving parents

> but happy childhood memories are difficult because I knew that " no one

> ever liked me " - that type of inner feeling is not conducive to happy

> memories - always felt left out. So maybe the docs are right - it does

> all go back to how you felt as a child. Food for thought.

My memories of childhood are that I never got any praise for anything I

did. I think my parents were trying to make me do better or something, but

it didn't work. I remember when I said I'd like to be a doctor that they

told me I was too stupid for that. I've never taken an IQ test because I'm

still afraid I'll find out I really AM stupid.

> ps - I guess depression is OT, but I am glad so many have felt

> comfortable enough to share what is very painful personally.

I think depression can be a big part of dealing with diabetes or any

illness. I guess Rick will give us a warning if we go too far. Should

probably stop, anyway because it's depressing....

- sky -

I base most of my fashion

taste on what doesn't itch.

http://www.skydancers.com

http://www.skydor.com

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I think it can, not sure tho. Call your pharmacist and ask him/her. I know

exactly how you feel with the not wanting to do anything and I'm not taking any

antidepressants. But I have been spending a lot of time just laying around in

bed doing nothing. My grandaughter makes me get up and m ove but otherwise I

just lay around. It sucks. I wish I didnt want to eat. I eat more. Gained 10

pounds in the last month. I sure dont need that with my diabetes. I just read

the website that gretchen provided regarding fibro. Very interesting.

Jan Haney

Can an anti-depressant make you more depressed?

sky

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Depression isn't utterly off-topic because it is part of what we deal with as

diabetics.

It affects how we take care of ourselves too...a major thing with diabetes!!!!!

Well, you all know *that*!

Tips given to deal with it, helps us all the way around, and I am learning

things I did not know, which gives me more control over my life, and my

diabetes, ultimately.

Venting sometimes is needed...and some of us have few folks we can vent to,

except for our on-line friends...because they understand.

I think we will be 'told' if we carry topic too far. lol. Meanwhile, 'enjoy' the

topic?

Ahem.

OKay, being a brat...it cheers me up!

Tam

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I watched some of a trial recently on Court TV of a young man who was

12 years old when he killed his grandparents, with whom he was living.

His attorneys blamed Zoloft. The jury didn't buy it, and found him

guilty. Sue

> After people are on a medication, the depression lifts a bit. They

> are still depressed, but are feeling more and have more energy, so

> this is often a time when people who have had strong wishes to die

> might try making an attempt. It's not the drug, per se...it's a

> phenomenon that goes along with depression. The media gets this all

> twisted around.

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I watched some of a trial recently on Court TV of a young man who was

12 years old when he killed his grandparents, with whom he was living.

His attorneys blamed Zoloft. The jury didn't buy it, and found him

guilty. Sue

> After people are on a medication, the depression lifts a bit. They

> are still depressed, but are feeling more and have more energy, so

> this is often a time when people who have had strong wishes to die

> might try making an attempt. It's not the drug, per se...it's a

> phenomenon that goes along with depression. The media gets this all

> twisted around.

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Hi folks,

My name is Pete and I'm a Type 2 diabetic from London.

I also take PRozac for depression and I was wondering

abt this:

" One of the side effects on most anti-depressants is

depression. It always made me wonder what the heck the

pill was for if it could make you depressed - sort of

an oxymoron. "

I keep hearing this kid of thing on the net but my

shrink says it's not true. ly I'm not sure I

trust him, but they dont list on the patient advisory

slip.

P.

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>dealing with the pain of two frozen shoulders on top of PN and fibro...I'm not

sure that statement is accurate in my case...PN/Fibro/and frozen shoulders DO

affect EVERYTHING! Especially when the pain level reaches a 10+<

Hi Liz,

I usually specify that I am speaking only for myself. Did I forget this time?

BTW, I have all the above problems too, although I don't think my pain levels

ever got up to 10+. It's hard to be sure because I have a high pain threshold.

I know that for almost a month, I was getting no more than 1-2 hours of sleep a

night. Ugh!!

Still, for me anyway, severe depression is harder to deal with than physical

pain.

Dianne

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Yahoo! Netrospective: 100 Moments of the Web

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I cannot deal with the pain on my really down days. If it weren't for

you guys here, and some dear friends, I think I would have gone around

the bend a while ago.

When my outlook is up, I can be more philosophical about the pain and go

about my business as best I can. On the other days, all I want to do is

cry about how unfair it all is.

Helen

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