Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 awwwwwww.......gem .....u responded perfectly.....truly..... i dont let little people get to me in any way..they are just that.....little....and its not about the size.....its about the brain..... i wouldve been more worried about your health as a obese person....did they express concern then? like i said.....when people say things... i just consider the source....unfortunately....weight is something that stands out....everyone has problems....most are hidden....like alcoholism.....abuse....etc....drugs..... i know who i am...what i am.....my health ......etc....so i dont worry about others .....i just smile.....and go on..... smiling kills em.....lmao keep up the good work gem.....u are so together......dont sweat the small people...and again...i dont mean size.... kisses....barbie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 I know the feeling Gem. Not that I am at my goal, nowhere near it in fact. Still, people know I am getting surgery sometime soon (hopefully) and they constantly bother me about how my 10% is going and when is my surgery. I just tell them, my 10% is going slowly but it's going and I will tell you when my surgery is, you can count on that! ===== Heidi Lauw Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 I know the feeling Gem. Not that I am at my goal, nowhere near it in fact. Still, people know I am getting surgery sometime soon (hopefully) and they constantly bother me about how my 10% is going and when is my surgery. I just tell them, my 10% is going slowly but it's going and I will tell you when my surgery is, you can count on that! ===== Heidi Lauw Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 Gem--I sympathize with you. I'm well known in my department, and I've let it be known that I had GBS. So many people tell me that " You're looking so good " or " You're getting so skinny " . When I tell people that I still want to loose at least 60 to 70 pounds more, they look shocked. I do get tired of the comments sometimes, though. I'm trying to make sure all the complements do not sidetrack me or make me complacent. I don't want to slip off my weight loss now. So, when I'm taking my walks through the halls of the office building, listening to my music (my minidisk player is with me when I take my exercise walks), if someone " complements " me, I just say thank you, and keep on walking (or climbing the stairs). And when I get to goal, my reaction to comments about me being " too skinny " will probably be something like saying that my doctors say I'm healthy. --Sandi H. Dr. Leo - 6/03/04 weighed 315 at orientation (May '03) 252 at surgery, last weighed at 200.5 (10/2/04) Hopefully someday below 140 sandiantoytrain @ yahoo . com > > Hello everyone: > > I just need to vent to a minute. > > I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, " Hey, man, are you > losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you? " > > I said, " No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine. " > > And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind > myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to > me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a > group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, " Do you > need help? " > > I said sarcastically, " Yes, my anorexia is making me weak. " > > He said, " I knew that you were pissed off by what I said. " > > I said, " Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight. " > > He said in a conciliatory tone, " I am just expressing my concern. > You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more > weight. " > > I said jokingly to everyone in the room, " Well, since we're > discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you > weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie? " And I continued around the room, > jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should > everyone else's. > > I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my weight. > And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said > nothing in the past. > > But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep breaths > and gritting my teeth. > > Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of > decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday. > > I'm better now. > > Thanks for listening (reading). > > Gemello > -148 lbs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 thanks for the encouragement barbie. I really appreciate it. Gemello -- In gastric-bypass-support-kaiser-patients , abadltlgirl4fun@a... wrote: > awwwwwww.......gem .....u responded perfectly.....truly..... > > i dont let little people get to me in any way..they are just > that.....little....and its not about the size.....its about the brain..... > > i wouldve been more worried about your health as a obese person....did they > express concern then? > > like i said.....when people say things... i just consider the > source....unfortunately....weight is something that stands out....everyone has > problems....most are hidden....like alcoholism.....abuse....etc....drugs..... > > i know who i am...what i am.....my health ......etc....so i dont worry about > others .....i just smile.....and go on..... > > smiling kills em.....lmao > > keep up the good work gem.....u are so together......dont sweat the small > people...and again...i dont mean size.... > > kisses....barbie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 thanks for the encouragement barbie. I really appreciate it. Gemello -- In gastric-bypass-support-kaiser-patients , abadltlgirl4fun@a... wrote: > awwwwwww.......gem .....u responded perfectly.....truly..... > > i dont let little people get to me in any way..they are just > that.....little....and its not about the size.....its about the brain..... > > i wouldve been more worried about your health as a obese person....did they > express concern then? > > like i said.....when people say things... i just consider the > source....unfortunately....weight is something that stands out....everyone has > problems....most are hidden....like alcoholism.....abuse....etc....drugs..... > > i know who i am...what i am.....my health ......etc....so i dont worry about > others .....i just smile.....and go on..... > > smiling kills em.....lmao > > keep up the good work gem.....u are so together......dont sweat the small > people...and again...i dont mean size.... > > kisses....barbie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 Heidi: Thanks for sharing my feelings. Keep up the good work. We eagles must soar above the turkeys... he he he. Gemello > I know the feeling Gem. Not that I am at my goal, > nowhere near it in fact. Still, people know I am > getting surgery sometime soon (hopefully) and they > constantly bother me about how my 10% is going and > when is my surgery. I just tell them, my 10% is going > slowly but it's going and I will tell you when my > surgery is, you can count on that! > > > ===== > Heidi Lauw Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 Sandy: Thanks! You keep up the good work. I will try to remember your support and your words when I'm challenged with this again. Gemello > > > > Hello everyone: > > > > I just need to vent to a minute. > > > > I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, " Hey, man, are > you > > losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you? " > > > > I said, " No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine. " > > > > And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind > > myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to > > me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a > > group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, " Do you > > need help? " > > > > I said sarcastically, " Yes, my anorexia is making me weak. " > > > > He said, " I knew that you were pissed off by what I said. " > > > > I said, " Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight. " > > > > He said in a conciliatory tone, " I am just expressing my concern. > > You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more > > weight. " > > > > I said jokingly to everyone in the room, " Well, since we're > > discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you > > weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie? " And I continued around the room, > > jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should > > everyone else's. > > > > I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my > weight. > > And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said > > nothing in the past. > > > > But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep > breaths > > and gritting my teeth. > > > > Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of > > decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday. > > > > I'm better now. > > > > Thanks for listening (reading). > > > > Gemello > > -148 lbs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 Sandy: Thanks! You keep up the good work. I will try to remember your support and your words when I'm challenged with this again. Gemello > > > > Hello everyone: > > > > I just need to vent to a minute. > > > > I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, " Hey, man, are > you > > losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you? " > > > > I said, " No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine. " > > > > And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind > > myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to > > me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a > > group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, " Do you > > need help? " > > > > I said sarcastically, " Yes, my anorexia is making me weak. " > > > > He said, " I knew that you were pissed off by what I said. " > > > > I said, " Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight. " > > > > He said in a conciliatory tone, " I am just expressing my concern. > > You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more > > weight. " > > > > I said jokingly to everyone in the room, " Well, since we're > > discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you > > weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie? " And I continued around the room, > > jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should > > everyone else's. > > > > I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my > weight. > > And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said > > nothing in the past. > > > > But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep > breaths > > and gritting my teeth. > > > > Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of > > decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday. > > > > I'm better now. > > > > Thanks for listening (reading). > > > > Gemello > > -148 lbs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 15, 2004 Report Share Posted October 15, 2004 Hey Gemello.... I can really identify where you are coming from on this one. Right now I've got a ton of people on my job trying their best to convince me that because I'm doing so well on the 1200 calorie diet that I should just give up on myself and " not give in " and have my WLS. Two things cross my mind: One, they are ignorant of the challenges of obesity and two, I refuse to give them the power to rule my emotions. So my friend, I just remind myself these two things and go about my day smiling like a cat that just caught a mouse. Works like a charm. The other thing that crossed my mind as I was reading your post was my worry for you that now that you've had your say with them, they will start treating you with kid gloves for everthing else. People can be such A* & -holes. Enjoy your tea and forget abouth them....don't give em your power. Hope that helps. Regards Gordy 8 cubes away from WLS > > Hello everyone: > > I just need to vent to a minute. > > I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, " Hey, man, are you > losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you? " > > I said, " No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine. " > > And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind > myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to > me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a > group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, " Do you > need help? " > > I said sarcastically, " Yes, my anorexia is making me weak. " > > He said, " I knew that you were pissed off by what I said. " > > I said, " Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight. " > > He said in a conciliatory tone, " I am just expressing my concern. > You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more > weight. " > > I said jokingly to everyone in the room, " Well, since we're > discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you > weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie? " And I continued around the room, > jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should > everyone else's. > > I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my weight. > And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said > nothing in the past. > > But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep breaths > and gritting my teeth. > > Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of > decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday. > > I'm better now. > > Thanks for listening (reading). > > Gemello > -148 lbs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 16, 2004 Report Share Posted October 16, 2004 Hi Gemello, You always impress me with your strength. You are so good at maintaining your boundaries. I love that you turned the tables on the folks at work. After all . . .. why should it only be YOUR weight that is up for discussion? Lately a number of people have referred to me as " skinny " - some of these folks were my friends, but both my pcp and my therapist said " Hi, Skinny " when I saw them in the last couple of weeks. I know that they mean well . . . but, it bugged me. There was a time when I couldn't imagine that that would have bothered me, but it did. I know that I'm not skinny - in fact, one of my recent milestones was to reach a weight where I am " obese " as opposed to " severely obese " (much less " super morbidly obese " like when I started). My therapist was the last one who said it and I am proud of the fact that I told her I didn't like it. I told her nicely and we talked about it. I'm just trying to accept myself and see myself as I am. I still have about 40 or 50 pounds left to lose, so no one is calling me " anorexic " yet, but I did have a friend who expressed concern that I might be becoming compulsive about tracking what I eat and so on. I had to laugh . . . I said that being compulsive about eating healthy foods in appropriate quantities is the last of my worries. It is always good to hear from you. Take care, Kay in San Leandro open RNY 12/1/03 gemellodigiovanni wrote: > > Hello everyone: > > I just need to vent to a minute. > > I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, " Hey, man, are you > losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you? " > > I said, " No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine. " > > And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind > myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to > me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a > group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, " Do you > need help? " > > I said sarcastically, " Yes, my anorexia is making me weak. " > > He said, " I knew that you were pissed off by what I said. " > > I said, " Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight. " > > He said in a conciliatory tone, " I am just expressing my concern. > You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more > weight. " > > I said jokingly to everyone in the room, " Well, since we're > discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you > weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie? " And I continued around the room, > jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should > everyone else's. > > I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my weight. > And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said > nothing in the past. > > But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep breaths > and gritting my teeth. > > Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of > decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday. > > I'm better now. > > Thanks for listening (reading). > > Gemello > -148 lbs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 17, 2004 Report Share Posted October 17, 2004 Kay- Yes, I am having that same uncomfortableness with people refering to me as skinny (ok, hello...i still have about 80lbs to lose) it just seems so wierd. Maybe I am just not used to taking compliments. The other weird thing is that I am having several people tell me that I am an inspiration for them to lose weight...and I cant help but think how wierd is that...these are people that have like 20-30lbs to loose. I guess I havent figured out how to deal with the skinny comments, I dont know what to say when people say things and I get embarrased. Anyway...just wanted to say...I know EXACTLY where you are comming from! Shanna > > > > > Hello everyone: > > > > I just need to vent to a minute. > > > > I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, " Hey, man, are you > > losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you? " > > > > I said, " No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine. " > > > > And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind > > myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to > > me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a > > group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, " Do you > > need help? " > > > > I said sarcastically, " Yes, my anorexia is making me weak. " > > > > He said, " I knew that you were pissed off by what I said. " > > > > I said, " Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight. " > > > > He said in a conciliatory tone, " I am just expressing my concern. > > You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more > > weight. " > > > > I said jokingly to everyone in the room, " Well, since we're > > discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you > > weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie? " And I continued around the room, > > jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should > > everyone else's. > > > > I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my weight. > > And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said > > nothing in the past. > > > > But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep breaths > > and gritting my teeth. > > > > Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of > > decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday. > > > > I'm better now. > > > > Thanks for listening (reading). > > > > Gemello > > -148 lbs Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2004 Report Share Posted October 18, 2004 I think I received this email in error. Carlisle wrote: Gem, People are always gonna have what to say! Try not to get too upset...people are most probably jealous ( which has been my experience when people have said things to me, weight related or no) of you and your accomplishment! You have to remind yourself that you are at goal and you made it...you sought after a goal and did not give up, and what any one has to say does not matter! Love gemellodigiovanni wrote: Hello everyone:I just need to vent to a minute.I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, "Hey, man, are you losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you?"I said, "No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine."And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, "Do you need help?"I said sarcastically, "Yes, my anorexia is making me weak."He said, "I knew that you were pissed off by what I said."I said, "Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight."He said in a conciliatory tone, "I am just expressing my concern. You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more weight." I said jokingly to everyone in the room, "Well, since we're discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie?" And I continued around the room, jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should everyone else's. I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my weight. And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said nothing in the past.But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep breaths and gritting my teeth.Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday.I'm better now.Thanks for listening (reading).Gemello-148 lbs __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2004 Report Share Posted October 18, 2004 Yup...sorry! Jo Leveque-Weesner wrote: I think I received this email in error. Carlisle wrote: Gem, People are always gonna have what to say! Try not to get too upset...people are most probably jealous ( which has been my experience when people have said things to me, weight related or no) of you and your accomplishment! You have to remind yourself that you are at goal and you made it...you sought after a goal and did not give up, and what any one has to say does not matter! Love gemellodigiovanni wrote: Hello everyone:I just need to vent to a minute.I'm at work this morning, and someone says to me, "Hey, man, are you losing more weight? You're not becoming anorexic are you?"I said, "No. I'm at goal weight. My doctor thinks I'm fine."And then I walked away and started to get angry. I tried to remind myself that Lyle, the guy who made the comment, is very friendly to me and often likes to tease. The next time I saw him, we were in a group setting. I was lifting a heavy machine, and he said, "Do you need help?"I said sarcastically, "Yes, my anorexia is making me weak."He said, "I knew that you were pissed off by what I said."I said, "Yes, people always make off hand remarks about my weight."He said in a conciliatory tone, "I am just expressing my concern. You're looking good, but I don't think you need to lose any more weight." I said jokingly to everyone in the room, "Well, since we're discussing my weight, let's discuss all of yours. How much do you weigh Lyle? Rose? Augie?" And I continued around the room, jokingly, to point out that if my weight is the topic, so should everyone else's. I'm glad that I pointed out that it is NOT OK to discuss my weight. And I'm glad that I turned the tables on them. I would have said nothing in the past.But still I'm sitting here, trying to calm down, taking deep breaths and gritting my teeth.Well, this venting has helped. I'm going to make myself a cup of decaf tea, and enjoy the rest of my Friday.I'm better now.Thanks for listening (reading).Gemello-148 lbs __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2004 Report Share Posted October 18, 2004 It seems so amazing how people can tell you what you should weigh. When you are overweight they tell you that you need to lose weight and when you start to be smaller than they are, you should stop because you look ill. I haven't had my surgery yet it will be on Nov 1st. I have already been asked how much do you intend to loss. I said probably around 120 pounds. They said oh no you will look awful. It just goes to show you that it is alway up to you what makes you feel good.Heidi Lauw wrote: I know the feeling Gem. Not that I am at my goal,nowhere near it in fact. Still, people know I amgetting surgery sometime soon (hopefully) and theyconstantly bother me about how my 10% is going andwhen is my surgery. I just tell them, my 10% is goingslowly but it's going and I will tell you when mysurgery is, you can count on that!=====Heidi Lauw __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted October 18, 2004 Report Share Posted October 18, 2004 It seems so amazing how people can tell you what you should weigh. When you are overweight they tell you that you need to lose weight and when you start to be smaller than they are, you should stop because you look ill. I haven't had my surgery yet it will be on Nov 1st. I have already been asked how much do you intend to loss. I said probably around 120 pounds. They said oh no you will look awful. It just goes to show you that it is alway up to you what makes you feel good.Heidi Lauw wrote: I know the feeling Gem. Not that I am at my goal,nowhere near it in fact. Still, people know I amgetting surgery sometime soon (hopefully) and theyconstantly bother me about how my 10% is going andwhen is my surgery. I just tell them, my 10% is goingslowly but it's going and I will tell you when mysurgery is, you can count on that!=====Heidi Lauw __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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