Re: OT, Need to vent!!

December 14, 2007

I don't know if you were right or wrong to do it...but it's not a mortal sin. I

do it, I HAVE to do it or I'll explode. I have been known to make a bit of

noise putting things down, closing doors, doing dishes, etc. Better to do that

than to kill. My husband yells at me when I make noise in the kitchen...even

when I'm not mad, because I'm clutzy. I drop things, I put a dish in the sink

and let it go to early and it makes a loud noise, he wants to know what I'm mad

about. Then I get mad, because I wasn't mad, I just dropped a dish. For years

he has kidded me about pouring milk...I can't do it. I wait until the glass is

about to overflow before I stop pouring. Don't know why. I know I do it, but

it's just the way my brain and arms work together. I finally combined that with

my excess noise in the kitchen (when I'm not mad) and explained it to my

husband, and he finally admitted that I was just clutzy and wasn't doing it on

purpose. Of course I do do it on purpose

when I can't control my rage. When you spend most of your time trying to

control yourself just to make it through a day, you're bound to explode now and

then.

My hubby was driving once, he turned onto a road that is known for having cops

sitting on it, and I told him, watch your speed, there are always cops here. He

looked over at me and SPED UP!!! I didn't say a word. We got to the red light,

stopped, a cop stops behind us. I told my hubby, he got you. He says no, he

doesn't have his lights on. Light turns green, cop turns lights on, pulls

hubbby over, and gives him his speeding ticket. ROFL Oh, I love that story.

It's even better because my hubby is the guy you don't want to be behind driving

around town. He putts along like he's the only guy in the world. It was his

first and only speeding ticket, he was going 38!!!! ROFL In a 25 zone. My

hubby is the only guy in the world to get a speeding ticket for going 38. Which

he would have avoided if he didn't feel like defying me right then. Hee hee

hee.

nancie

AJ wrote:

I can't BELIEVE Greg!!! He got pulled over and was given a $120

ticket in the little town next to where our house is, on our 1-year

anniversary (dating), Dec. 2. Then, tonight we got pulled over (he

was driving), and we were given a warning (about 20 miles away from

the house). Then, HE KEPT DRIVING LIKE 10-20mph OVER THE SPEED LIMIT

as soon as he was out of the cop's sight!!!!!!!! Then, when I asked

him to please slow down, and reminded him of what the speed limit

was, he said that he knew what the speed limit was. So, then I tried

a different tactic... I reminded him that because he was just given a

warning, that if he gets pulled over AGAIN tonight, that he will

DEFINITELY get another (at least) $120 ticket, and that we didn't

have enough money to pay for the last one yet, so how will we pay for

this one, and what will he do if he loses his license? He told me

(very angrily) to DROP IT. (I did this reminding, when we were 2

miles away from the town where the house is, there is only one cop in

this town, and he is nicknamed Barney Fife, because he will pull you

over if you are just 1mph above the limit, and then he will say that

you are 6mph above the limit). I did not say anything the rest of

the way home, I just stared straight face out the windshield, as he

took the country roads at breakneck speed. Then, when we got to the

house, I got out of the car and walked straight to the front door,

unlocked the door using my keys (normally I wait for him to unlock

the door), and then I went in the house threw my 2 bags that I take

with me everywhere (no breakables) onto the floor in front of the

couch really hard (made loud noise), then put the lean pockets in the

freezer (loudly), and then made as much noise as possible while

putting my coat on the door knob. He finally looked at me and

said, " What are you mad about now? " I said, " I just really don't

think that someone who has been pulled over twice in a week and a

half, has been given a $120 ticket and a warning, should be going 15

mph over the speed limit, ESPECIALLY within the city limits of where

the cop gave you the $120 ticket, THE SAME NIGHT THAT YOU GOT A

WARNING!! We don't have that much money, and it is not that

difficult to just slow down! You were getting on me earlier for not

wearing makeup and dressing up like I used to and not being able to

do as much as I used to, well at least that stuff doesn't cost us

$120 a pop! Your credit history and your old credit cards that we

are paying off don't bother me very much, because it is in the past,

and we are fixing it, but this DOES BOTHER ME, because it is

something that is easily fixed and preventable, but yet you STILL

CONTINUE TO DO IT!! I'm sorry if it feels like I am nagging you, I

don't mean to, but why do you keep doing this? We need to watch our

money, because if we don't, then we could VERY EASILY lose this

house. "

Was I wrong to do/say that? I just don't understand what the problem

is here!! I mean if the speed limit is 50, why can't he just go 50,

why does he HAVE to go 65-75? I, personally, have never been pulled

over and never gotten a ticket. I was so freaked out when we got

pulled over! It scared the crap out of me (didn't help that he had

had 2 guinness's tonight either and that we were driving an hour and

a half back home, with me being carsick, and feeling so crappy that i

couldn't have driven if i had wanted to!). I know that I was

probably mainly reacting to being pulled over, but still, isn't this

a talk that needed to happen? I mean, he might as well be stopping

at a strip bar and giving the girls $120 each time he gets a ticket,

not to mention the insurance rate hikes!! (At least at a strip bar

he would get enjoyment, maybe a better scenario would be him taking

basically 2 of his $75 papa john's paychecks (second job, dependent

on him having a valid driver's license) and dropping them down a

gutter!!)

Sorry... but GRRR!!

:-(

---------------------------------

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December 14, 2007

You said what needed to be said. ly why are you letting this man put

your life in danger, disrespecting you, and may cause more expenses for the

both

of you. Your accepting this treatment, the question is why? Life is much

to short

for this. Just my 2 cents. Bonnie

>

> I can't BELIEVE Greg!!! He got pulled over and was given a $120

> ticket in the little town next to where our house is, on our 1-year

> anniversary (dating), Dec. 2. Then, tonight we got pulled over (he

> was driving), and we were given a warning (about 20 miles away from

> the house). Then, HE KEPT DRIVING LIKE 10-20mph OVER THE SPEED LIMIT

> as soon as he was out of the cop's sight!!!!!!!! Then, when I asked

> him to please slow down, and reminded him of what the speed limit

> was, he said that he knew what the speed limit was. So, then I tried

> a different tactic... I reminded him that because he was just given a

> warning, that if he gets pulled over AGAIN tonight, that he will

> DEFINITELY get another (at least) $120 ticket, and that we didn't

> have enough money to pay for the last one yet, so how will we pay for

> this one, and what will he do if he loses his license? He told me

> (very angrily) to DROP IT. (I did this reminding, when we were 2

> miles away from the town where the house is, there is only one cop in

> this town, and he is nicknamed Barney Fife, because he will pull you

> over if you are just 1mph above the limit, and then he will say that

> you are 6mph above the limit). I did not say anything the rest of

> the way home, I just stared straight face out the windshield, as he

> took the country roads at breakneck speed. Then, when we got to the

> house, I got out of the car and walked straight to the front door,

> unlocked the door using my keys (normally I wait for him to unlock

> the door), and then I went in the house threw my 2 bags that I take

> with me everywhere (no breakables) onto the floor in front of the

> couch really hard (made loud noise), then put the lean pockets in the

> freezer (loudly), and then made as much noise as possible while

> putting my coat on the door knob. He finally looked at me and

> said, " What are you mad about now? " I said, " I just really don't

> think that someone who has been pulled over twice in a week and a

> half, has been given a $120 ticket and a warning, should be going 15

> mph over the speed limit, ESPECIALLY within the city limits of where

> the cop gave you the $120 ticket, THE SAME NIGHT THAT YOU GOT A

> WARNING!! We don't have that much money, and it is not that

> difficult to just slow down! You were getting on me earlier for not

> wearing makeup and dressing up like I used to and not being able to

> do as much as I used to, well at least that stuff doesn't cost us

> $120 a pop! Your credit history and your old credit cards that we

> are paying off don't bother me very much, because it is in the past,

> and we are fixing it, but this DOES BOTHER ME, because it is

> something that is easily fixed and preventable, but yet you STILL

> CONTINUE TO DO IT!! I'm sorry if it feels like I am nagging you, I

> don't mean to, but why do you keep doing this? We need to watch our

> money, because if we don't, then we could VERY EASILY lose this

> house. "

>

> Was I wrong to do/say that? I just don't understand what the problem

> is here!! I mean if the speed limit is 50, why can't he just go 50,

> why does he HAVE to go 65-75? I, personally, have never been pulled

> over and never gotten a ticket. I was so freaked out when we got

> pulled over! It scared the crap out of me (didn't help that he had

> had 2 guinness's tonight either and that we were driving an hour and

> a half back home, with me being carsick, and feeling so crappy that i

> couldn't have driven if i had wanted to!). I know that I was

> probably mainly reacting to being pulled over, but still, isn't this

> a talk that needed to happen? I mean, he might as well be stopping

> at a strip bar and giving the girls $120 each time he gets a ticket,

> not to mention the insurance rate hikes!! (At least at a strip bar

> he would get enjoyment, maybe a better scenario would be him taking

> basically 2 of his $75 papa john's paychecks (second job, dependent

> on him having a valid driver's license) and dropping them down a

> gutter!!)

>

> Sorry... but GRRR!!

> :-(

>

December 14, 2007

Men!!! Or, should I say 'boys'. It just seems to take them SO much longer to

grow up than it does us. I think your anger was totally justified. He was also

putting your life in danger at that point. That just is NOT right. I think you

are on the right track with this. Now, after the heat of the moment is over, you

should sit him down once again and go over all the points you made. He really

needs to have it repeated. Try not to be accusatory, but just calmly state the

facts. It concerns both your financial future as well as what kind of life you

can have together. Of course, he needs to understand the danger of using a car

as a weapon, which is exactly what he was doing. I hope you can get through to

him in a way that he will understand and respect.

My thoughts are with you.

Peace and Love

Caroline