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So, today

after my shower I decided I would blow-dry my hair, and I got a hold

of Amy's 2 curling irons and went to work. I thought I did a

half

way decent job. I came out of the bathroom and ask my

husband, "Well, what do you think?" He laughed at me!!

He

said, "Now all you need to do is get rid of the gray! ha ha ha ha".

I was so hurt!

,

I

am usually pretty calm and mild mannered! But I am afraid I would

have to rip his lips off for that!

What a turd!!!!

You

look beautiful! Hang in there!

*hugs* Becky

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Lips ??? You sure lips ??? Lips huh ???

OK

*laff* Yes his

lips! So he wouldn't be able to say such a horrible thing again!

Men!!!! (no Offense to present company *S*)

Becky

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> So, today

> after my shower I decided I would blow-dry my hair, and I got a hold

> of Amy's 2 curling irons and went to work. I thought I did a half

> way decent job. I came out of the bathroom and ask my

> husband, " Well, what do you think? " He laughed at me!! He

> said, " Now all you need to do is get rid of the gray! ha ha ha ha " .

> I was so hurt!

>

,

I don't if we have talked much but I do know you are a very sweet

person and have been a great addition to the group I have read alot

of you post I have been not leaving to many post in the past and am

just getting back into the hang again...lol but I just want to tell

you a little about me I am 36 and was told that I had chronic

pancreatis in May of 2000 I have been through the ercp and ct scans

and hida scan and ultra sounds and as you know just had my

gallbladder out,, but anyway I wanted to comment on this post of

yours I would have been hurt too, and I hope you told him just how he

made you feel he should know that that would hurt you .. and I

wouldn't do my hair for him again for a very long time or I would die

my hair blue and see if he liked that better then the gray..lol they

have that wash out stuff that would shook him... take care my friend

your friend from Michigan..

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In a message dated 01/18/2001 3:31:57 PM Central Standard Time,

briffle@... writes:

<< Well, what do you think? " He laughed at me!! He

said, " Now all you need to do is get rid of the gray! ha ha ha ha " .

I was so hurt!

,

I am usually pretty calm and mild mannered! But I am afraid I would

have to rip his lips off for that!

What a turd!!!!

You look beautiful! Hang in there!

*hugs* Becky >>

, I'm with Becky on this one. I think I would like to sew his mouth

shut so he couldn't say hurtful things to you. Have you let him know how

much this really hurts you? For years my husband's " humor " was coming across

in a hurtful way and he didn't realize how bad it was hurting me until I had

to get really nasty with him and let him know how serious I was. It took

some practice and time for him to get to the point where he doesn't say

hurtful things very often now. This was how he was raised and he didn't

realize he was being so critical or downright mean.

Hope this helps some and I hope that you have had a good day and feel

wonderful and beautiful!!!!!!!!

Sandy

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>

> , I'm with Becky on this one. I think I would like to sew his

mouth

> shut so he couldn't say hurtful things to you. Have you let him

know how

> much this really hurts you?

Hi Sandy, How are you doing?

Yes, I told him he hurt my feelings, and I do believe he felt bad

about it. After 21 years of marriage, he knew exactly what he was

doing. Also, he has never, ever seen me " primp " before, and I think

it threw him off guard, but still he had no right to say that. The

other reason I think he felt bad was because he really warned Amy not

to say anything. She did tell me honestly, she thought it looked

nice, but ask if she could have a shot at styling it for me. I think

since she has plenty of time on her hands this weekend, due to a

grounding, I will let her try. Can't hurt anything.

Thanks for the pep talk. You are so kind. Thats what I like about

this place, people honestly care about each other.

Lots of Hugs,

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In a message dated 01/20/2001 12:10:42 AM Central Standard Time,

liamhoha20@... writes:

<< Yes, I told him he hurt my feelings, and I do believe he felt bad

about it. After 21 years of marriage, he knew exactly what he was

doing. Also, he has never, ever seen me " primp " before, and I think

it threw him off guard, but still he had no right to say that. The

other reason I think he felt bad was because he really warned Amy not

to say anything. She did tell me honestly, she thought it looked

nice, but ask if she could have a shot at styling it for me. I think

since she has plenty of time on her hands this weekend, due to a

grounding, I will let her try. Can't hurt anything. >>

, hang in there. I've now been married 26 years and it has only been

the last couple of years that my husband has stopped saying hurtful things.

Yes, he is very slow at coming around and he too always felt bad when he said

something that was hurtful. He always apologizes, but as I told him it is

not always easy to forget what was said. I don't think he says things out of

meanness because he is a very caring individual. I just believe he doesn't

understand how easy it is to slip back into old habits if you don't work hard

at changing those patterns of behavior.

You know, it is so wonderful to hear that there are other people out there

married for a long time and still having to work at making the relationship

work. There are times I've wondered why we just haven't gotten it down right

yet. I know intellectually that any time two people live together there will

be differences, however I've thought sometimes that he should know by now

what he does or says that irritates me or hurts my feelings.

Thanks for putting things in perspective for me. We have been through so

much together as a couple and I realize that many couples do not make it

through the difficult times. We have worked through so much and living with

chronic illnesses together now has it own set of problems that I am just now

learning to be more patient with.

Sandy

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  • 1 month later...

Welcome Home !

We are so glad you are home and doing better! while you were

gone we got the pleasure of meeting your lovely wife Lori! she is a

terrific lady!

Just wanted to say welcome home! You were missed!

Becky

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  • 4 weeks later...
Guest guest

Thanks Bec! See, this is why I love this place! People like you

make it all worth while. Thanks alot, my friend.

Lots of Love,

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I don't think I could survive without all of you!!

Lots of Love,

,

Oh you could survive just not as well!

Love, Becky

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  • 1 year later...

Whew, that must be a relief that it won't be as invasive although

I'm sure you're very upset to have to go through it again. At least

I knew from the very beginning that I would have two surgeries.

Since I had my upper and lower done separately, I didn't have to be

wired and this time I was allowed to take the bands off after two

weeks. Now I only have to wear them 50% of the time. I, too, am able

to eat mushy foods now so that has made recovery much easier this

time around. That should make a big difference to you as well.

Hopefully you won't have as much of a problem with nausea this time

either since your surgeon will anticipate it. Fortunately I don't

remember vomiting after my first surgery but this time they must

have given me something different because I never got nauseated

after the second surgery. Also at home, for pain, I take Mepergan

which has the anti-nausea medication, Phenergan, in it. That has

worked very well for me and nausea was never a problem. It knocks me

out for about 12 hours but I have my husband and parents here to

help me with my one and two year old daughters.

Good luck and Jan 31 will be here and gone before you know it. I

love my new face and profile as it's emerging and it makes the

surgeries totally worth it.

> > > > Hey Irish - the few people I've known who did this a second

> time

> > > had

> > > > a much easier go of it. You know what didn't work well, and

you

> > > know

> > > > what to expect, for the most part.

> > > >

> > > > Come on! Get excited! You're gonna finally turn the page on

all

> > of

> > > > this stuff!

> > > >

> > > >

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  • 10 months later...

I could have written your words below!!! I am almost a year out and I have

lost just a little more than you, so first off conrats on all your hard, hard

work. As for the other topics, here is my info:

Compliments:

Sometimes I have hard time with these because it almost feels like people

are saying you were soooo bad before and now you are great! That can be hard.

But I am learning that the ones I take in are from close friends who are

happy to see me m ore happy and moving better and feeling more alive. You have

done a lot of hard work, this is very, very hard work, and you should feel

proud. I am not su re what else to say about this.

Pouch stretching:

I am curious about this too. Sometimes I worry because I can eat more t han

I used to. I can eat things I used to not beable to eat! It makes me kind of

miss th e sick feelings that would tell me to stop. I think that as you get

further out from surgery, you need to learn to use your new lifestyle skills

of know what and how much to eat instead of just relying on your body to tell

you it can't do anymore. That, of course, is easier said than done. I would

lvoe to hear what others have to say too.

Weightloss slowing:

Mine has and it is hard. I just try to remember the advice of everyone here

about more protien, water and exercise and have faith that it will keep

working. It is also better on our bodies to lose weigh at a slower rate. And I

also found that I lost more inches when my #'s on the scale stopped, or slowed

down. Like my body was catching up.

Keep us posted on your progress.. we are all here for you.

Natasha

lap rny 11/19/02

340*225*160

In a message dated 11/3/03 9:43:20 AM, Gastric_Bypass_Family

writes:

<< Although I am doing well with the weight loss I am worried that it's going

to

come to a halt and to lose anymore weight will be a constant struggle. Does

anyone else experience these feelings or concerns?

I also struggle with excepting compliments from people. People who haven't

seen me in such a long time can't get over the change or they can hardly

recognize me without giving me a second look. I usually tell them " thanks "

but

usually in a tone like it's no big deal. Does anyone else struggle with

this?

I'm sure it's because I'm not used to receiving compliments from others.

And finally sometimes I concerned that I can eat too much (at times) and I've

already " stretched " out my pouch. Is the " pouch stretching " just a myth?

And how big can it really be stretched out to? >>

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  • 9 months later...

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