Up All Night

[Guest guest]

Up All Night

Man .. sounds like a great title for a song ..

unfortunately .. my up all night wasn't because I was partying!

Asthma has kicked in big time .. started having angina again yesterday

morning along with the coughing ..

called heart doc .. went in to have an EKG done with his nurse

practitioner .. argued with her .. I do NOT want to spend another

Christmas in the hospital just because they want to monitor me .. told

them give me a holter monitor so I can just have my son run it back

across town every 24 hours .. so .. I had my heart meds adjusted .. was

sent home without the monitor .. but ended up puking most of the night

because of the med adjustment ..

I feel like a used up shadow of myself this morning ..

tried sleeping this morning around 5 am .. but I can hear my heart beat

in my ears ..

my mind is thinking way too much .. remembering past heart attacks and

aftermaths ..

and my pulse is way too fast (134 resting pulse) .. but at least I have

stopped puking.

Just hobbled my way to the bathroom (got to love those fluid pills ..

NOT) ..

seems I am just catching my breath from walking through the house to the

bathroom ..

when it is time to go again! Wish I had a damn laptop .. I would just

stay sitting on the toilet!!

I love my family .. but I swear I feel like an oddity in a fish bowl ..

everyone watching my every move ..

I just want to sleep ..

ok .. enough whining ..

Oh .. I have an article started on Lupus and Multiple Sclerosis ..

but it is going to have to wait .. sorry .. my mind is just not in

research mode today ..

more like trudging along in survival mode.. smiles..

gonna go lie down .. take care all ..

hope your holidays are going better than mine!

smiles..

hugs...