Re: Positive thoughts after weighing myself

September 2, 2009

,That's awesome! Thank you for sharing this with us. Congratulations on finding peace.Abby

I stepped on the scale this morning. It's funny b/c the weight that it said on the scale was what I expected. I knew I had gained weight...I could feel it in my tummy and the way some of my clothes were fitting. My son said something yesterday that triggered anxiety about my weight. Since then I'd been wandering in the unknown about my weight. Thoughts like I must have gained a bunch...like 10 pounds in three weeks. So for me this morning, before I stepped on the scale, I told myself that I don't have to act out (either by restricting or overeating) based on the number it shows. And it was quite funny b/c the number I thought I was, I actually was. Yes, I did gain. I knew that. But for me in that moment it was okay to weigh myself. It took away the boogey men that were saying I had ballooned (I feel like I've done that). It was also a comfort to me to know that I have gained but it's b/c I've been overeating and not exercising as much (running 20 miles a week). This experience this morning helps me to know that I can work on IE and eventually I will eat with peace, have a fuller life, and my weight will come down naturally without all the hyper attentiveness of dieting. It's reassuring to know that when I let myself have freedom with food (imperfect)that I don't go way out of control. I have chosen limitless amounts recently, but even then I really don't want to do that. I guess what I'm trying to say is that me () wants to have a happy and peaceful relationship with food and my body. I really don't want to self-destruct with food. I can trust myself. It will just take some time.

Thanks,

September 2, 2009

I thought for a minute that this was something I wrote... but then I checked who

wrote it and it wasn't me Anyways - I was about to do this on sunday this

week because I know I have gained weight - because I am not exercising like a

lunatic and actually taking a day or two off a week (OMG!) and I wanted to

settle those boogeymen and actually see the number but I didn't want to ruin my

progress. So I asked my husband - who is all for this approach for me and who

has never cared about my weight - to look at the number while I got on the scale

and in a month or two I would do it again and he could tell me if it was up or

down. Even not knowing the number kind of made me feel like I have gained a ton

but I keep reminding myself that I am improving each day or learning something

new about myself - like if I eat a full meal at night I tend not to have to

graze/nosh afterwards - so that the key is what happens in a while and not

today. another thing is that until that day I was sharing with my husband all

what I was going through and he was saying that I was just as obessessed as I

was with dieting and now after this I feel like I can't share with him because I

would know from his reaction where I am - up alot or just some - and I really

don't want to know right now. Today I remembered that all I wanted from my diet

group after 15 years was the ok that I could eat out in a restaraunt something I

liked every so often and they wouldn't give me the ok. Truth be told, I didn't

give me the ok! I wasn't living becasue i was so scared of gaining a bit of

weight even if it was for a week! I just wanted it legitimized to eat something

" not dietetic " and I didn't get it. Had they done that or had I been able to

give it to myself - I would have achieved the IE approach at a lower weight!

Because I had already achieved some form of intuitive eating all on my own even

being in an organized group. But the obsession about the weight was destroying

me. I realized today that I must have had had to go through the kinds of foods

and amounts I have been going through the last month to get rid of my diet

mentality completely and the not going on the scale at all - to be able to

embrace the IE approach. I believe that I most of the time crave healthier foods

and every so often crave the fun stuff and now with no food police over me and

within me (working on it) I can enjoy that also. I don't have to consume the

whole box. And I have proved that I can go out to restaurants and choose EXACTLY

what I want and not overeat or not go crazy afterwards. I can relax and enjoy.

And I am learning to honor my hunger. It is harder listening to the fullness

level but I am working on it. So thank you for your post.

>

> I stepped on the scale this morning. It's funny b/c the weight that it said

on the scale was what I expected. I knew I had gained weight...I could feel it

in my tummy and the way some of my clothes were fitting. My son said something

yesterday that triggered anxiety about my weight. Since then I'd been wandering

in the unknown about my weight. Thoughts like I must have gained a bunch...like

10 pounds in three weeks. So for me this morning, before I stepped on the

scale, I told myself that I don't have to act out (either by restricting or

overeating) based on the number it shows. And it was quite funny b/c the number

I thought I was, I actually was. Yes, I did gain. I knew that. But for me in

that moment it was okay to weigh myself. It took away the boogey men that were

saying I had ballooned (I feel like I've done that). It was also a comfort to

me to know that I have gained but it's b/c I've been overeating and not

exercising as much (running 20 miles a week). This experience this morning

helps me to know that I can work on IE and eventually I will eat with peace,

have a fuller life, and my weight will come down naturally without all the hyper

attentiveness of dieting. It's reassuring to know that when I let myself have

freedom with food (imperfect)that I don't go way out of control. I have chosen

limitless amounts recently, but even then I really don't want to do that. I

guess what I'm trying to say is that me () wants to have a happy and

peaceful relationship with food and my body. I really don't want to

self-destruct with food. I can trust myself. It will just take some time.

>

> Thanks,

>

September 2, 2009

Bravo for you! That is a very big step - not the one onto the scale, but the one

to 'master' it ;-) Putting yourself in charge and managing your life is as much

what IE is about as eating changes. Happy IE journey :0

Katcha

IEing since March 2007