Re: struggling in this spot...

August 21, 2009

I am new, so my advice is limited, but I have one question for you...when you

bought the cookies, how much did you buy?

KT

>

> I feel ridiculous... I'm struggling and I feel like I know how to stop

struggling, but I just can't seem to get past it.

>

> Since I've been giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I keep

choosing to eat cookies. LOTS of them! And I don't feel good. I'm having

trouble identifying my hunger cues anyway and this messes with it even more

eating so much sugar. I don't even feel hungry for real food...

>

> So, to sum up, the cookies make me feel bad, but I still want to eat the

cookies. Maybe because I never let myself eat them before? But, you'd think I

wouldn't crave them because they make me feel bad...

>

> It seems so simple to just tell myself to not eat food that makes me feel bad,

but it seems like that's just another 'rule' telling me what I 'should' or

'should not' eat.

>

> Has anyone else experienced something similar to this? I'm still new to this

process and hoping that this is just a phase!

>

> Thanks,

>

August 21, 2009

I actually made the cookies... So, there is a HUGE tupperware container of them

sitting on the counter that for some reason I keep digging into...

I'm wondering if I'm using eating them to avoid doing homework... I don't feel

physically hungry, but my mouth is watering thinking about them. ???

Jen

> >

> > I feel ridiculous... I'm struggling and I feel like I know how to stop

struggling, but I just can't seem to get past it.

> >

> > Since I've been giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I keep

choosing to eat cookies. LOTS of them! And I don't feel good. I'm having

trouble identifying my hunger cues anyway and this messes with it even more

eating so much sugar. I don't even feel hungry for real food...

> >

> > So, to sum up, the cookies make me feel bad, but I still want to eat the

cookies. Maybe because I never let myself eat them before? But, you'd think I

wouldn't crave them because they make me feel bad...

> >

> > It seems so simple to just tell myself to not eat food that makes me feel

bad, but it seems like that's just another 'rule' telling me what I 'should' or

'should not' eat.

> >

> > Has anyone else experienced something similar to this? I'm still new to

this process and hoping that this is just a phase!

> >

> > Thanks,

> >

>

August 21, 2009

i think legalizing foods is really hard. and also that many, if not most of us, have experienced what you are going through.it DOES pass. eventually all of you will believe that you can have cookies whenever you want them, and they will lose their power over you.

my only advice is to try and eat them consciously, really sit down and focus on the taste, and the textures, and how it feels to eat them. i ate cookie dough for weeks... and now i haven't wanted it in quite a while. it does get easier!

hang in there!oh, and if you are struggling with homework, a question that i've read that i like is " am i hungry or do i just want to change the way i feel? " so in this case, are the cookies a way for you to take a break? can you give yourself permission to take a break even if you aren't hungry? and do something else that makes you feel cared for?

good luck!

I feel ridiculous... I'm struggling and I feel like I know how to stop struggling, but I just can't seem to get past it.

Since I've been giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I keep choosing to eat cookies. LOTS of them! And I don't feel good. I'm having trouble identifying my hunger cues anyway and this messes with it even more eating so much sugar. I don't even feel hungry for real food...

So, to sum up, the cookies make me feel bad, but I still want to eat the cookies. Maybe because I never let myself eat them before? But, you'd think I wouldn't crave them because they make me feel bad...

It seems so simple to just tell myself to not eat food that makes me feel bad, but it seems like that's just another 'rule' telling me what I 'should' or 'should not' eat.

Has anyone else experienced something similar to this? I'm still new to this process and hoping that this is just a phase!

Thanks,

-- Abigail C. Wolfson, RN, MS, CPNP

August 21, 2009

I too loved to eat cookies that I have made. I found that I would grab one or

two every time I passed in sight of the cookie jar - hungry or not! What helped

me initially was to package about 6 cookies into a baggie and put these packages

into the freezer. That way the cookies ARE 'available' but I'm not reacting to a

visual trigger instead of a more thoughtful " I want a cookie " type of reason

(hopefully mindful eating). Being able to put a 'pause' between whatever is

triggering me to eat (cookies) and just grabbing them mindlessly helped me

become more mindful about eating them. Notice that I still continued to make and

eat cookies!

Next step is to be able to use the 'pause' to ask yourself - why do I want these

cookies? Am I really body hungry and if not, what am I reacting to?

For the moment I say its as important to just ENJOY the cookies. One of the hard

parts of ditching diet mentality is proving to YOURSELF that you can and will

provide what you want when you want it. Of course we all go overboard with

previously 'forbidden' foods! But if you give it a chance not only will you find

that you do relax into a better eating pattern for your body, but you also start

to enjoy eating instead of 'fighting' with food ;-)

Keep up the good observations and efforts!!

BEST to you - Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> I feel ridiculous... I'm struggling and I feel like I know how to stop

struggling, but I just can't seem to get past it.

>

> Since I've been giving myself permission to eat whatever I want, I keep

choosing to eat cookies. LOTS of them! And I don't feel good. I'm having

trouble identifying my hunger cues anyway and this messes with it even more

eating so much sugar. I don't even feel hungry for real food...

>

> So, to sum up, the cookies make me feel bad, but I still want to eat the

cookies. Maybe because I never let myself eat them before? But, you'd think I

wouldn't crave them because they make me feel bad...

>

> It seems so simple to just tell myself to not eat food that makes me feel bad,

but it seems like that's just another 'rule' telling me what I 'should' or

'should not' eat.

>

> Has anyone else experienced something similar to this? I'm still new to this

process and hoping that this is just a phase!

>

> Thanks,

>

August 21, 2009

Good point! Its not only having the food available - it really helps to have

MORE than you can eat so that you aren't triggered by 'last supper' mentality

towards it too. (legalizing/stocking up)

Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> I am new, so my advice is limited, but I have one question for you...when you

bought the cookies, how much did you buy?

>

August 21, 2009

Jen, your observation is an excellent one! I find that when I am either 'bored'

or unable to get going on some project, delaying the start by eating can be an

effective distraction! After all I 'am doing something' - eating! Gillian told

me that she finds that many IE challenged people are 'do-ers' - and can't stand

to be idle. I so relate to that :)

PS my reply regarding how I managed my being triggered by the sight of a

container full of cookies is just an example of another way to react. There are

many other options and I hope you find what works for you too. Please continue

to share what you are doing as this helps us all too.

Thanks, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> I actually made the cookies... So, there is a HUGE tupperware container of

them sitting on the counter that for some reason I keep digging into...

>

> I'm wondering if I'm using eating them to avoid doing homework... I don't

feel physically hungry, but my mouth is watering thinking about them. ???

>

> Jen

August 24, 2009

Thank you all so much for the replies

I'm still eating the cookies. In the back of my mind I keep thinking that I

shouldn't eat the cookies though. I'm acknowledging that thought and still

eating the cookies with a hope that I can someday lose the 'should not' voice.

I'm guessing this 'should not' voice is what is making me want the cookies so

much...

I've realized that I really need to work on being more mindful while eating. I

tend to eat while driving, reading, or watching TV. There is something

comforting in eating while doing something else... Interesting I promised

myself that my next meal will be had at the dinner table, not the coffee table,

so I'll be able to pay full attention to eating.

A couple of you also mentioned pausing to question if I was hungry or looking

for something else to do, perhaps a break. After thinking about this over the

weekend, I realized several times I ate for reasons other than hunger! I even

realized it before I ate one of the times, but still let myself eat, just

noticing it. I thought about what I was really craving and realized one of the

times, I just wanted some attention from my boyfriend...perhaps a hug... And a

few other times, I was just overtired and reached for food hoping for some

energy.

Thanks again for all the responses They helped me to be able to be conscious

of these habits and my needs.

J

August 24, 2009

You are totally getting this. You really hit on something when you said " the

shouldnot voice is what is making me want the cookies so much.

Whenever I sit in front of the tv and eat, my body doesn't get a chance to know

it's full either. For me, it because it's some form of an escape because all my

senses are being filled: touch, taste, hearing, seeing and smell. But

ironically, I don't feel like I got satisfied when I eat like that.

You're awareness of what you're doing is huge and very powerful.

KT

>

> Thank you all so much for the replies

>

> I'm still eating the cookies. In the back of my mind I keep thinking that I

shouldn't eat the cookies though. I'm acknowledging that thought and still

eating the cookies with a hope that I can someday lose the 'should not' voice.

I'm guessing this 'should not' voice is what is making me want the cookies so

much...

>

> I've realized that I really need to work on being more mindful while eating.

I tend to eat while driving, reading, or watching TV. There is something

comforting in eating while doing something else... Interesting I promised

myself that my next meal will be had at the dinner table, not the coffee table,

so I'll be able to pay full attention to eating.

>

> A couple of you also mentioned pausing to question if I was hungry or looking

for something else to do, perhaps a break. After thinking about this over the

weekend, I realized several times I ate for reasons other than hunger! I even

realized it before I ate one of the times, but still let myself eat, just

noticing it. I thought about what I was really craving and realized one of the

times, I just wanted some attention from my boyfriend...perhaps a hug... And a

few other times, I was just overtired and reached for food hoping for some

energy.

>

> Thanks again for all the responses They helped me to be able to be

conscious of these habits and my needs.

>

> J

>

August 25, 2009

AFter reading this thread I remembered the scene with in Seinfeld when he

was in bed with someone and was eating some kind of food at the same time. That

is how I feel when I eat something delicious - and have the TV on. As if only

if all together do I get the " orgasmic " feeling! (sorry that was the only way I

could describe it because that is what I feel like - it is almost an actual

physical feeling) But now I realize that I have to separate the feelings. When

i choose now to turn off the TV while I eat or stop reading while I eat and just

concentrate on every single enjoyable satisfying bite - it is a whole new

experience - especially if it is a food I have been depriving myself of for a

long time. I am not sure if it is as " orgasmic " as it was before - so I still

am experimenting but when I " do " it all together I am beginning to realize I am

not really tasting the food. . And when I finish the tv program I have to have

more to taste what I was eating. So I am begining to understand how that

contributes to overeating. It is difficult to give up doing everything at once

but it is starting to feel good to take my time for each action. And I am

beginning to understand that I - Diane - want to taste that delicious food. I

don't want to just stuff it down my throat in a hurry so I can eat again.

What's the point?

August 25, 2009

Thanks KT

I had a good mindful moment today. I was overhungry for lunch and finishing up

paying for stuff at the store when I spotted the fancy chocolates... First

reaction...I can have chocolate, which should I get? I had a couple in my hands

and then realized, probably for the first time ever, I didn't even want

chocolate. I was planning on making a stir-fry for lunch and that's what I

wanted. It was just instinct to feel like I shouldn't have the chocolate and

that made me reach for it. So, I put down the chocolate and made lunch at home.

That experience made me wonder how many times I just ate because food was there,

even though I didn't even really desire it...

It felt good to know what I wanted...or really didn't want

> >

> > Thank you all so much for the replies

> >

> > I'm still eating the cookies. In the back of my mind I keep thinking that I

shouldn't eat the cookies though. I'm acknowledging that thought and still

eating the cookies with a hope that I can someday lose the 'should not' voice.

I'm guessing this 'should not' voice is what is making me want the cookies so

much...

> >

> > I've realized that I really need to work on being more mindful while eating.

I tend to eat while driving, reading, or watching TV. There is something

comforting in eating while doing something else... Interesting I promised

myself that my next meal will be had at the dinner table, not the coffee table,

so I'll be able to pay full attention to eating.

> >

> > A couple of you also mentioned pausing to question if I was hungry or

looking for something else to do, perhaps a break. After thinking about this

over the weekend, I realized several times I ate for reasons other than hunger!

I even realized it before I ate one of the times, but still let myself eat,

just noticing it. I thought about what I was really craving and realized one of

the times, I just wanted some attention from my boyfriend...perhaps a hug...

And a few other times, I was just overtired and reached for food hoping for some

energy.

> >

> > Thanks again for all the responses They helped me to be able to be

conscious of these habits and my needs.

> >

> > J

> >

>

August 25, 2009

, I really appreciate your sharing this. It really shows the power of intuitive eating. Old habits can be broken. CaroleSubject: Re: struggling in this spot...To: IntuitiveEating_Support Received: Tuesday, August 25, 2009, 2:08 PMThanks KT :)I had a good mindful moment today. I was overhungry for lunch and finishing up paying for stuff at the store when I spotted the fancy chocolates... First reaction...I can have chocolate, which should I

get? I had a couple in my hands and then realized, probably for the first time ever, I didn't even want chocolate. I was planning on making a stir-fry for lunch and that's what I wanted. It was just instinct to feel like I shouldn't have the chocolate and that made me reach for it. So, I put down the chocolate and made lunch at home. That experience made me wonder how many times I just ate because food was there, even though I didn't even really desire it...It felt good to know what I wanted...or really didn't want

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August 25, 2009

,

How fun that you mentioned chocolate. Today I bought 4 large bags of M & Ms - just

because! I really didn't want them when I bought them, but I felt it would be

good for me to just have them available anyway. I haven't been having much

chocolate around of late (yay legalizing!) but I know myself well by now - I can

find myself slipping into the 'thoughts of chocolate' and rather than fight with

those shoulds/shouldn'ts, I do so much better to just eat some and get OVER it

there and then. So for me having them around is a good thing. And by the way,

that took me some time before I got to that point too ;-)

Maybe you can indulge with a fancy chocolate or two 'just because' and LOVE it

too. And congrats on your mindful moment - these are fabulous & precious too.

Best to you - Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> Thanks KT

>

> I had a good mindful moment today. I was overhungry for lunch and finishing

up paying for stuff at the store when I spotted the fancy chocolates... First

reaction...I can have chocolate, which should I get? I had a couple in my hands

and then realized, probably for the first time ever, I didn't even want

chocolate. I was planning on making a stir-fry for lunch and that's what I

wanted. It was just instinct to feel like I shouldn't have the chocolate and

that made me reach for it. So, I put down the chocolate and made lunch at home.

That experience made me wonder how many times I just ate because food was there,

even though I didn't even really desire it...

>

> It felt good to know what I wanted...or really didn't want

>

August 26, 2009

Great post. Thanks. KT

>

> AFter reading this thread I remembered the scene with in Seinfeld when

he was in bed with someone and was eating some kind of food at the same time.

That is how I feel when I eat something delicious - and have the TV on. As if

only if all together do I get the " orgasmic " feeling! (sorry that was the only

way I could describe it because that is what I feel like - it is almost an

actual physical feeling) But now I realize that I have to separate the

feelings. When i choose now to turn off the TV while I eat or stop reading

while I eat and just concentrate on every single enjoyable satisfying bite - it

is a whole new experience - especially if it is a food I have been depriving

myself of for a long time. I am not sure if it is as " orgasmic " as it was

before - so I still am experimenting but when I " do " it all together I am

beginning to realize I am not really tasting the food. . And when I finish the

tv program I have to have more to taste what I was eating. So I am begining to

understand how that contributes to overeating. It is difficult to give up doing

everything at once but it is starting to feel good to take my time for each

action. And I am beginning to understand that I - Diane - want to taste that

delicious food. I don't want to just stuff it down my throat in a hurry so I

can eat again. What's the point?

>

August 26, 2009

Isn't this amazing? Eat what you WANT? What a concept?? lol KT

> > >

> > > Thank you all so much for the replies

> > >

> > > I'm still eating the cookies. In the back of my mind I keep thinking that

I shouldn't eat the cookies though. I'm acknowledging that thought and still

eating the cookies with a hope that I can someday lose the 'should not' voice.

I'm guessing this 'should not' voice is what is making me want the cookies so

much...

> > >

> > > I've realized that I really need to work on being more mindful while

eating. I tend to eat while driving, reading, or watching TV. There is

something comforting in eating while doing something else... Interesting I

promised myself that my next meal will be had at the dinner table, not the

coffee table, so I'll be able to pay full attention to eating.

> > >

> > > A couple of you also mentioned pausing to question if I was hungry or

looking for something else to do, perhaps a break. After thinking about this

over the weekend, I realized several times I ate for reasons other than hunger!

I even realized it before I ate one of the times, but still let myself eat,

just noticing it. I thought about what I was really craving and realized one of

the times, I just wanted some attention from my boyfriend...perhaps a hug...

And a few other times, I was just overtired and reached for food hoping for some

energy.

> > >

> > > Thanks again for all the responses They helped me to be able to be

conscious of these habits and my needs.

> > >

> > > J

> > >

> >

>

August 27, 2009

Hey Diane,

I'm a big Seinfeld fan, so I know the episode

I know exactly what you mean and I go through the same thing. And I notice that

when I eat and I'm not doing something else at the same time, I don't eat to the

point of being stuffed. I still eat more than I could to be satisfied, but

there's a big difference in a couple extra bites and the stuffed feeling. I

hate the stuffed feeling!