RE: Re: Today I found three books that I ordered...

[Guest guest]

Katcha wrote:

> Perhaps you weren't ready (state of mind) to read them then? I bet you

> find that they have a greater impact on you at this stage of your IE than

> they would have had 5 years ago. You have come a long way

>

That's what I thought as well.

> I found that I am getting more meaningful input from (slowly) reading When

> Women Stop Hating Their Bodies. I think that if I had read it immediately

> (and quickly too) when I first started IE, I would have passed by many of

> the points that are now very helpful for me.

That gives me some hope that rereading the IE books will be helpful. :-)

> Hope you can write a short review of these as you read them so others here

> can have insight into more resources too.

That's a good idea. I think I might do this.

Regards

s.

[Guest guest]

Katcha wrote:

> Styxia, I hope that one of those books was When Women Stop Hating Their

> Bodies.

I've read that book a while ago and I thought it was good. The feelings

I described were not present about 1.5 years ago when I read it. I don't

know what caused the change and why I feel reluctant to pick up one of

these books again or *any* book about this subject. They used to make me

feel better, not they make me feel awful somehow. I might be in some

sort of denial at the moment but can't figure out what's wrong. It seems

quite confusing.

In case you're interested, the books I ordered and never read are:

" Anatomy of a Food Addiction " , " The Craving Brain " and " ADD and

Addiction " .

Regards

s.

[Guest guest]

It's not only women who struggle with food and body image and fat. I've

wrestled with these issues all my life, and I have to say it's discouraging

to read a book that speaks only to women.

Gender is part of the equation, but by no means the whole story. Men wrestle

with this too. I wrestle with this.

Harry

Re: Today I found three books that I

ordered...

Styxia, I hope that one of those books was When Women Stop Hating Their

Bodies. Its really not about BSing one's self into 'cherishing' your body

(when you really don't feel that way). Its a wonderful collection of

EXPERIENCES and realizations that women who have been through the

non-dieting process (I'd even call it de-tox! ;-). It has been a great

source of leading me into my feelings and understanding WHY I do and feel

what I do.

Best wishes to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

>

> Some days ago I wrote about three books I've ordered a few years ago

> and never read because I simply forgot them. I discovered that I MUST

> have the somewhere at home because dear amazon told me that I have

> baught the books in the past some weeks ago when I did a search for

> books. If there wouldn't have been the line above the book that told

> me I have baught them in the past I would have ordered them again.

>

> Well, I started paging through all three of them this morning and I

> think I found the reason why I

>

> 1) may have forgotten the books.

>

> 2) don't feel so good about re-reading some non-diet books.

>

> They make me feel hope- and powerless somehow. I can't put my finger

> on the reason yet, but I hope I can soon.

>

> Is anyone else on here who shares these feelings? Any idea why they

> come up?

>

> Regards

> s.

>

------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Katcha, do you have the name of the author of this book? I'd love to get a copy or see if I can get it at my library. I'm totally new to the concept of intuitive eating (well, in my adult years anyway because I'm sure I practiced this without knowing what it was called in my teen years) and would like to learn as much as I can to get my eating under control and deal with whatever emotions from my past that are helping to keep me fat.

Thanks,

Sharon

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wednesday, June 10, 2009 10:21:04 AMSubject: Re: Today I found three books that I ordered...Styxia, I hope that one of those books was When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies. Its really not about BSing one's self into 'cherishing' your body (when you really don't feel that way). Its a wonderful collection of EXPERIENCES and realizations that women who have been through the non-dieting process (I'd even call it de-tox! ;-). It has been a great source of leading me into my feelings and understanding WHY I do and feel what I do. Best wishes to you, KatchaIEing since March 2007>> Some days ago I wrote about three books I've ordered a few years ago and> never read because I simply forgot them. I discovered that I MUST have> the somewhere at home because dear amazon told me that I have baught the> books in the past some weeks ago when I did a search for books. If there> wouldn't have been the line above the book that told me I have baught> them in the past I would have ordered them again.> > Well, I started paging through all three of them this morning and I> think I found the reason why I> > 1) may have forgotten the books.> > 2) don't feel so good about re-reading some non-diet books.> > They make me feel hope- and powerless somehow. I can't put

my finger on> the reason yet, but I hope I can soon.> > Is anyone else on here who shares these feelings? Any idea why they come> up?> > Regards> s.>------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

I agree. It's not fair to sterotype body image self-doubt or worries over weight/diet issues.

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wednesday, June 10, 2009 11:25:21 AMSubject: RE: Re: Today I found three books that I ordered...It's not only women who struggle with food and body image and fat. I'vewrestled with these issues all my life, and I have to say it's discouragingto read a book that speaks only to women. Gender is part of the equation, but by no means the whole story.. Men wrestlewith this too. I wrestle with this. Harry-----Original Message-----From: IntuitiveEating_Support [mailto:IntuitiveEating_Support ] On Behalf Of KatchaSent: Wednesday, June 10, 2009 9:21 AMTo: IntuitiveEating_Support Subject: Re: Today I found three books that Iordered...Styxia, I hope that one of those books was When Women Stop Hating TheirBodies. Its really not about BSing one's self into 'cherishing' your body(when you really don't feel that way). Its a wonderful collection ofEXPERIENCES and realizations that women who have been through thenon-dieting process (I'd even call it de-tox! ;-). It has been a

greatsource of leading me into my feelings and understanding WHY I do and feelwhat I do. Best wishes to you, KatchaIEing since March 2007>> Some days ago I wrote about three books I've ordered a few years ago > and never read because I simply forgot them. I discovered that I MUST > have the somewhere at home because dear amazon told me that I have > baught the books in the past some weeks ago when I did a search for > books. If there wouldn't have been the line above the book that told > me I have baught them in the past I would have ordered them again.> > Well, I started paging through all three of them this morning and I > think I found the reason why I> > 1)

may have forgotten the books.> > 2) don't feel so good about re-reading some non-diet books.> > They make me feel hope- and powerless somehow. I can't put my finger > on the reason yet, but I hope I can soon.> > Is anyone else on here who shares these feelings? Any idea why they > come up?> > Regards> s.>------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Katcha! I'm always a bit scared when I make posts like that.

I've been making a conscious search for books about men with eating issues,

and so far the only one I've found that's any good is Hungry. It's very

OA-centric, though.

I was in OA for years, and I found the fellowship and spiritual aspects very

helpful. But I always had a hard time with the notion of " abstinence. " It

always felt like a diet to me.

Now I've really committed to the IE approach, and let me tell you it was

scary. For the first three months my weight shot up -- and I was already

350+ pounds.

But lately I'm really starting to feel shifts. I eat less and less on a

schedule. I'm eating a wider variety of foods -- lots of fruit & veggies.

I've even started to have meatless meals (which for me was heresy -- I used

to love the Atkins diet). And I've stopped gaining weight, and maybe even

starting to lose weight.

Anyway, it's nice to find such a strong community here.

Cheers,

H

Re: Today I found three books that I

ordered...

YES YES YES Harry!!! I am always sooo happy to have men chime right in to

remind us (and authors too) that Fat is NOT only a 'feminist' issue - its a

HUMAN one. The only ding I have with most books promoting non-dieting is

that they too much cater to gals. Guys eat, have body and social challenges

too. As mentioned recently, a discussion/review of When Women Stop Hating

Their Bodies is going to be tried by a group of longer term IEer members and

I really hope that Arnie will join in too. He was as wonderful a member here

as any of us gals, and my only disappointment with the authors of the book

(WWSHTB) is that they had only worked with women and pretty much based much

of the causes for deep ingrained issues related to eating in the experiences

of being 'little girls'. Every one of the 'issues' had a HUMAN aspect to in

as far as I could tell.

Keep us (gals esp.) totally aware of your needs and insights too. You get

LOTS of 'guts points' for being here - YEA! for you and THANKS too.

ehugs, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

PS what say you too Tim?

>

> It's not only women who struggle with food and body image and fat.

> I've wrestled with these issues all my life, and I have to say it's

> discouraging to read a book that speaks only to women. Gender is part

> of the equation, but by no means the whole story. Men wrestle with

> this too. I wrestle with this. Harry

------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

Katcha wrote:

> I know that you have and continue to struggle with your 'demons' which I

> can tell is very frustrating too! (how well I know ;-)

It's indeed very frustrating.

> I admire that you

> have stuck to this and are still pounding the ground looking for a

> solution.

Thank you. I feel exactly like you said: like being in an impasse. The

road before me semms blocked and so seems the way back.

> And for myself, part of the reasons that

> I can't/don't do that meaningful work more often is because one of the

> internalized stopping blocks is a combo of shame I still buy into and the

> fact that my OUTward 'tools' are so much more exercised and honed than my

> INward skills.

Maybe I focus too much on the outward, I don't know. I think what's

blocking me at the moment might be that all seems like an endless battle

with no winner in the end.

I can't turn back the time to make some things undone (damage done to my

body because of being obese for so long) or do some things differently.

s.

[Guest guest]

Awesome. Thanks for the tips. I'm actually not just new to the group, but to the whole yahoo groups experience as well.

Sharon

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wednesday, June 10, 2009 1:00:19 PMSubject: Re: Today I found three books that I ordered...Sharon (and any other newbie) - there is a Book List in the Files section at the group (Yahoo) site. I highly recommend that you print it out or copy it over to your computer for reference. Additions - books and comments - to this list can be made right here in the posts so that this list continues to grow and be updated.I've had good luck with getting used copies at Half.com and Amazon too. Even found a free copy at paperbackswap.com!KatchaIEing since March 2007>> Katcha, do you have the name of the author of this book? I'd love to get a copy or see if I can get it at my library. I'm totally new to the concept of intuitive eating (well, in my adult years anyway because I'm sure I practiced this without knowing what it was called in my teen years) and would like to learn as much as I can to get my eating under control and deal with whatever emotions from my past that are helping to keep me fat. > > Thanks, > Sharon------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

It is probably fear. Fear that you are good enough to judge when you are

hungry and when you are full. This can be very empowering and a little

scarey.

Deborah Ledgerwood

For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be

compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. Romans 8 " 18

Re: Today I found three books that I

ordered...

Some days ago I wrote about three books I've ordered a few years ago and

never read because I simply forgot them. I discovered that I MUST have

the somewhere at home because dear amazon told me that I have baught the

books in the past some weeks ago when I did a search for books. If there

wouldn't have been the line above the book that told me I have baught

them in the past I would have ordered them again.

Well, I started paging through all three of them this morning and I

think I found the reason why I

1) may have forgotten the books.

2) don't feel so good about re-reading some non-diet books.

They make me feel hope- and powerless somehow. I can't put my finger on

the reason yet, but I hope I can soon.

Is anyone else on here who shares these feelings? Any idea why they come

up?

Regards

s.

------------------------------------

[Guest guest]

There's only one OA meeting in my area and I attended a few times a couple of years ago. I felt the same way ... like everything was off limits forever and there was too much deprevation. It also was more like a social hour with everyone talking about the "forbidden foods" that they had eaten the previous week. I attend my husband's AA meetings (he's clean and sober 6 years now) from time to time and really wish the OA meeting in this area was more like his AA meeting because I actually get a lot out of it. I listen intently and substitute my food addiction for their alcohol or chemical addictions. Sometimes I even have something to add to their meetings.

Have a great day, everyone!

Sharon

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wednesday, June 10, 2009 9:53:01 PMSubject: Re: Today I found three books that I ordered...I understand exactly what you mean about OA. I found it to make me feel like food was evil for me. The spiritual aspect is fantastic. I just think they did a weird tweak on the view of the original 12 steps.Warrior> >> > It's not only women who struggle with food and body image and fat. > > I've wrestled with these issues all my life, and I have to say it's > > discouraging to read a book that speaks only to women. Gender is part > > of the equation, but by no means the whole story. Men wrestle with > > this too. I wrestle with this. Harry> > > > > ------------------------------------> >

[Guest guest]

I'm a person who wants to always be in control, too, Gillian. But, I felt like the food and the diet programs were controlling me (all the counting, knowing in the morning what I was going to eat for dinner so I knew how many points I had left, etc.). I felt like food and dieting stripped me of my freedom to live my own life (at least where eating was concerned). This is why I've decided to try to tune into my own body and learn to be an IE-er. I've lost control of my body and it's needs ... and I'm not about to let food or dieting keep the control. I'M TAKING IT BACK! :-)

Sharon

To: IntuitiveEating_Support Sent: Wednesday, June 10, 2009 10:07:44 PMSubject: Re: Today I found three books that I ordered...For what it's worth, I'm the same way with my IE, non-diet, self-help-ish books too. I go through phases where I can't wait to read more, where they DO make me feel better and powerful and smart for wanting my life to be this way. But then I go through other periods where I can't read them (especially When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies - that was a tough one to get through!). I don't know why because they SHOULD make me feel better, but it got to a point where if my husband had already fallen asleep I couldn't read any because I would

burst in to tears and never stop. Or at least it felt like never - I felt lonely and scared and totally incapable of doing anything...I think part of it, and part of my resistance to the non-diet approach in general, is feeling out of control. I'm a huge control freak, and was always a very good dieter, until my second child was born at least. So measuring, counting, weighing, etc. was a great way for me to be in control of everything, or so I felt. Not doing all that feels too relaxed and carefree, which I equate to out of control, and it spirals from there. I've gotten past it to some extent. I'm doing ok but not reading a lot these days. I see the books and think I want to read... But then pull out a magazine or start a novel. I trust that I will get back to them when I want or need to. The latest I was working on was Big Fat Lies, which I also recommend, btw. But I liked what Katcha said about When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies not being

about us just bs-ing ourselves into cherishing our bodies... that's kind of where I'm stuck (I can accept that not everyone is a size 2, but dammit _I_ still want to be!). It's nice to know that others struggle with similar things.Gosh, I always think I'm just going to write a quick message and end up writing a novel. Thanks for listening. :)Gillian------------------------------------