Introducing myself...

[Guest guest]

Hello-

I'm new to the group, thought I would introduce myself and tell my story.

My name is Dawn, and I've been struggling with binge-eating for many years. I

don't remember the last time I've had an entire day of eating for the right

reasons. The problem seemed to be triggered in college (although I'm pretty

sure it was there, under the surface, for quite some time before that). I

remember feeling like I had to eat as much as I could in the dorms, " to get my

money's worth. " It was like a buffet restaurant...if you pay $12 for a meal,

you feel like you should eat a lot!

When I lived in an apartment with roommates, things improved. We bought

groceries and cooked for ourselves, and while we didn't always make the

healthiest choices (lots of Hamburger Helper!), I rarely felt out of control

with my eating. I was in a good habit of exercise, and at a stable and healthy

weight.

I have lived alone for 4 years now, and the last four years have been wild

swings of out-of-control eating. I don't want to feel like I'm eating alone, so

I turn on the t.v., and I keep eating until the show is over instead of stopping

when I'm full or when the plate is empty. I let myself get too hungry, and then

binge on fast food instead of making a better choice. I bake a pan of brownies,

and eat the whole batch in a day or two. I use food as a numbing agent for

boredom and loneliness, and sometimes after a binge I realize that I also use it

as a way to be self-destructive.

I have gained about 30 pounds since moving in alone, despite regular exercise.

I feel unhealthy, uncomfortable in my skin, out of control in my eating, and I

want to change. I don't want my control or happiness to be dependent upon the

roommates of my past, or a husband that I might hope for in the future. I want

to learn to be content and in control in my life as it is now, no matter what

the future brings.

I skimmed through Intuitive Eating about a year ago, and I'm ready to read it

more in-depth and really learn how to change. Asking for support from all of

you " internet strangers " is a big deal for me. No one knows how much of an

issue my eating is for me. I hope I can offer support for you as well, as we

all work on our issues.

Thanks for letting me tell my story! Any tips for a beginner?

[Guest guest]

Dawn - Welcome! I am also new here within the last few days. I have finally

coming to the realization, after many years, that I eat for emotional reasons.

Sounds like you have come to the same realization too. I think that is probably

a big step. No advice for you, just wanted to tell you that you are not alone.

Sue

Sent via BlackBerry by AT & T

[Guest guest]

Welcome Dawn. What worked for me best when I was starting was to pick the one

aspect of IE that appealed to me most and (gently) work on that until I felt

comfortable with it. I would then take on another practice and let the baby

steps be the beginning of my IE journey. There's lots of things you can do, but

if you try and take them all on at once, its as overwhelming as trying to eat an

entire feast in a few bites!

Looking forward to hearing about your baby steps - we all take them in our own

pace and way

Best to you, Katcha

IEing since March 2007

> Thanks for letting me tell my story! Any tips for a beginner?

>

[Guest guest]

Dawn,

Welcome to the group! I can relate to what you shared in terms of my past eating

being distorted by different emotions that come up more when living alone. I

think that it's great that you want to transform your overeating pattern so that

you can take care of yourself and not be so dependent on others (friends or a

future husband) to help you maintain balance. Ofcourse, it's important to have a

strong support network, however, someone will not always be around when we are

dealing with intense emotions and uncomfortable body states and in that

instance, it might be easy to turn to food.

I've been practicing IE since January '08, and my ability to take care of myself

without using food as improved tremendously. I've gone months without spinning

out with food whereas in the past I would get overwhelmed and use food

regularly. Hirschmann and Munter's book When Women Stop Hating Their Bodies

(WWSHTB) is another IE source that I would highly recommend for you to have.

This book contains more in-depth information on dealing with mouth hunger

(emotional eating) and speaks to the heart of this issue.

I started re-reading the mouth hunger chapter today because I've been overeating

this week after experiencing an extended period of feeling relatively peaceful

around food. I yelled at myself harshly on Monday and triggered a deep issue I

have about feeling like I'm always on my own and I have to do everything for

myself. I realized what happened by Tuesday and things began to improve. I have

understood through this episode that yelling at myself doesn't end well.

Abraham Lincoln's quote about " a house divided against itself cannot stand " has

been going through my head...a Latoya divided against herself can also not

stand. Soon into the Mouth Hunger chapter the authors write: " Each time you

reach for food when you are not hungry, you are looking for a caretaker. You end

up searching for a caretaker in the refrigerator because there is no one at

home--no presence within you at the moment--to do the job of soothing " (p. 188).

So true, so true. This is also true when we continue to eat beyond fullness.

My threshold of taking care of myself was breached during this time. So, it's

now time for me to do some more work to really cultivate the caretaker in me

even more. An internal caretaker would have not allowed me to yell at myself in

the way that I did or would have helped me soothe myself and find balance again

after without food. I write this to say that the process of making peace with

food is ongoing...you get more skillful over time. I spent over a year working

with the Intuitive Eating book before reading WWSHTB. You could probably work

with both books, if you pace yourself to make sure that you don't feel

information overload/pressure.

There is great wisdom and support on this group that you'll benefit from on your

IE journey!

Latoya

> Thanks for letting me tell my story! Any tips for a beginner?

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Dawn. I can so relate to the eating in front of the tv, the brownies gone

too quick, etc. I think you will really love Intuitive Eating. There are

other books recommended here that are great too. I think you will love it here.

Welcome!

Warrior

>

> Hello-

> I'm new to the group, thought I would introduce myself and tell my story.

>

> My name is Dawn, and I've been struggling with binge-eating for many years. I

don't remember the last time I've had an entire day of eating for the right

reasons. The problem seemed to be triggered in college (although I'm pretty

sure it was there, under the surface, for quite some time before that). I

remember feeling like I had to eat as much as I could in the dorms, " to get my

money's worth. " It was like a buffet restaurant...if you pay $12 for a meal,

you feel like you should eat a lot!

>

> When I lived in an apartment with roommates, things improved. We bought

groceries and cooked for ourselves, and while we didn't always make the

healthiest choices (lots of Hamburger Helper!), I rarely felt out of control

with my eating. I was in a good habit of exercise, and at a stable and healthy

weight.

>

> I have lived alone for 4 years now, and the last four years have been wild

swings of out-of-control eating. I don't want to feel like I'm eating alone, so

I turn on the t.v., and I keep eating until the show is over instead of stopping

when I'm full or when the plate is empty. I let myself get too hungry, and then

binge on fast food instead of making a better choice. I bake a pan of brownies,

and eat the whole batch in a day or two. I use food as a numbing agent for

boredom and loneliness, and sometimes after a binge I realize that I also use it

as a way to be self-destructive.

>

> I have gained about 30 pounds since moving in alone, despite regular exercise.

I feel unhealthy, uncomfortable in my skin, out of control in my eating, and I

want to change. I don't want my control or happiness to be dependent upon the

roommates of my past, or a husband that I might hope for in the future. I want

to learn to be content and in control in my life as it is now, no matter what

the future brings.

>

> I skimmed through Intuitive Eating about a year ago, and I'm ready to read it

more in-depth and really learn how to change. Asking for support from all of

you " internet strangers " is a big deal for me. No one knows how much of an

issue my eating is for me. I hope I can offer support for you as well, as we

all work on our issues.

>

> Thanks for letting me tell my story! Any tips for a beginner?

>

[Guest guest]

Latoya,

That's so great that you're figuring those things out! I'm especially impressed

that you knew where to look, and are able to find the message that you need to

hear and apply it to your challenge. " A Latoya divided against herself cannot

stand " ...You're in my prayers while you get the divided Latoya's back together

again!

I can tell I'm just at the beginning of this process. I started re-reading IE

this afternoon after I posted my first message, and I might as well be reading

it for the first time, how little I remember! I know what my eating

personalities are now, but I have yet to know what to do with that info. I'm

sure it will come with time. I really appreciated your message, even though I

have so little IE foundation right now. The idea of being my own caretaker was

in my head all evening, and I took a bubble bath and cleaned up my kitchen

before going to bed, two things that really make me feel peaceful and taken care

of. I still feel a lot of guilt over my eating today, but...baby steps!

Thanks, Latoya!

Dawn

> > Thanks for letting me tell my story! Any tips for a beginner?

> >

>