Potty Training

[Guest guest]

My daughter (now age 12) was not fully daytime trained until she was almost

8. Looking back, I can see that most of the fault can be laid directly at my

feet. Instead of following my heart, I listened to everyone else, such as my

husband, in-laws, my parents, friends and the so called " professionals " that

told me that it would be oh so much better if she were toilet trained. I

tried everything humanly possible, even meds to get her trained. Finally, I

blew up at everyone and told them all to mind their own business and promised

them all that she would be out of pull-ups before her 21st birthday. Then, I

just crossed my fingers.

After almost a year of doing nothing whatsoever, and as happy as a

lark, I grabbed her favorite toy and threw it into the bathroom, telling her

that it could only be played with if she were sitting on the toilet. I still

kept her in pull-ups, never saying a word when they were completely soaked.

After about a week, she trained herself to use the toilet during the day.

Sometime a few months later, Elmo came out of the bathroom and after a good

washing, went back into her toy box.

I left her alone with the nighttime wetting as well, putting on the pull-up

right before bed, and limiting the water after 7PM. She did not begin

getting up at night to use the toilet until this summer, when she turned 12.

And, regardless of what time during the night she gets up, she takes off the

pull-up while she's using the bathroom and throws it in the trash, and still

wakes up dry 99% of the time. She will not go to bed without the pull-up,

and for now, that's fine with me. I might be wasting $13 every two weeks on

pull-ups that are thrown out in fine condition, but $13 is a small price to

pay for my sanity.

I think that the biggest problem for me was the fact that everyone tried to

make me feel " guilty " for not having her toilet trained. The school even

went so far as to send home weekly reminders that she was the only student

with a toilet trainer in her class. Once I stood my ground and told everyone

that it was just fine with me if she wore a pull-up for the next 16 years,

the pressure was off. Did I want her in a pull-up? Absolutely not, but,

like autism, I was willing to accept what she could and couldn't do and work

with that.

Maureen