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Thanks K

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>> thanks for the vent K. and inspiration.

>> A great way to start my day!

Judy

>>

>> Lately I have been thinking what would it feel like to not let myself

>> talk this way... And fear comes up. I am afraid that if I let myself

>> feel beautiful, inside and out, that someone will come along and

>> knock me down. I will be going through life feeling great about how I

>> look and someone will come along and say " Hey, Missy you aren't that

>> great looking. You better tone your confidence down a bit " .

>>

>> I have this fear because this has happened to me before. Several

>> years ago when I was (unintentionally) practicing I.E. I gained a lot

>> of weight while legalizing taboo foods and also recovering from

>> disordered eating. I felt AMAZING, inside and out. I was gaining

>> weight but I had no idea. I actually didn't even give it a thought, I

>> just felt so good. But then I had some important people in my life

>> take me aside and say they were concerned about my weight gain. They

>> meant well but it hurt so much. I felt betrayed and robbed of my new

>> found confidence.

>>

>> Since then my " recovery " has been side - tracked. Since that time I

>> have spent years on diets trying to lose weight, trying to be the

>> weight these people want me to be.

>>

>> But I just can't do this anymore. I look good! I am hot! We are all

>> hot! I am NOT going to let other people, whoever they are, let their

>> negative energy seep into me. I can't give other people power to

>> dictate how I live mine. As long as I am happy and healthy with my

>> life who cares what my weight is!

>>

>> Okay, vent over. : )

>>

>> - K

>>

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