Weirded out by idea of sedation

January 20, 2003

Okay, let me preface this by saying that I don't have a problem with

the choices of anyone else who's been enjoying their nitrous

or " don't-care " gas or morphine valium or codeine because of gag-

reflex issues or post-surgery pain or whatever. And anyone who reads

what I'm about to say and thinks there are Other Issues at work

here, well, yeah, of course I know there are. That said...

I'm comfortable with the idea of being put under general anaesthesia

for the surgery (I don't want to think about what it'd be like under

a local!) but I'm freaked out at the thought of being sedated

beforehand. Someone (well-dressed Mike?) said something in a

previous post about being given some sort of nice medicine that made

him really happy before they actually put him out (and asked for

extra to make him extra-happy, which they gladly gave him). Now,

that's fine for him, but for me, I read that and thought, " Ew, I

don't want them to give me anything like that! "

Is there generally any opportunity to get to meet your

anaesthesiologist beforehand like Cammie did, so you can tell them

what you want or don't want, or is Cammie just lucky? And if you do

get to chat with the anaesthesiologist, how do you get them to

*believe* that you don't want any happy-medicine before surgery and

take you seriously about it?

I think my worst nightmare as they put the IV full of saline on me,

I'd be telling the nurse or anaesthesiologist, " Please, don't sedate

me beforehand, I really want to be lucid up to the time the doctor

comes in so I can see what's going on and remember this clearly, "

only to have him think, " Yeah, yeah, the ones who say this are

always the ones who wind up freaked out when we strap their arm to

the board, so I'll just nod and smile and then give her an extra big

dose just to shut her up. "

There's so much about this procedure and the recovery period that's

going to leave me at a disadvantage and out of control. I'm worried

that keeping the least little bit of control is going to be a

battle, and one that I fear I don't have a hope of winning because

I'm the one lying on the table. Besides, anything I say before

surgery is going to be some of the last clearly-enunciated words

I'll be able to say for a while.

Any advice beyond " Surrender, Dorothy " ?

Rhonda

Recommended Posts