Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

July 22, 2009

Absolutely. Although my divorce etc happened many years ago and my daughter is doing so well and I now have a really great man who is so good with her - there are times when only another mom going through the trials & tribulations can be the "hug" that we need and the "you are doing a great job" that we also need to hear can be a warm bath for our souls.

PS I live in the central broward area.

Cheryl

To: sList Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 11:32:45 AMSubject: was: Restraint now: single moms

Being a single parent in any circumstances is filled with challenges ..it is not always easy. Having a child with a different ability and mixing in issues of divorce, separation, and dual parenting... can be very difficult..ot to mention the emotional and financial aspects. I think there are many of us out there who are in the same position. Single Moms want to try and plan a night out? for friendship, support, to exchange resources etc. Anyone else think this is a good idea..let me know..

From: Wihlborg <ewihlborgyahoo (DOT) com>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 9:37:19 AMSubject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

Jayne,

I can not imagine how hard it has been for you with your daughter, We all seem to have our own heartaches and decisions we have to make to ensure our kids are going to be ok. I have been reading through the posts and I do not know how you do it. I have a wonderful 6 year old boy, who is in the cluster program at our local public school, with health issues that can not go away. I do not know what I am doing, do not know how to deal with his health issues and Autism and I am seperating from my husband. You seem like a very strong woman and I hope that I will be that soon.

From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Monday, July 20, 2009 2:01:02 PMSubject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

You are caring for your child as a loving parent and want what is best for your child. I don't think there are any of us who would not want the best for our children, whether it is diet, meds, pcm, or even releasing into a group home. Who are we to judge? It is extremely hard on the parent to not be given support/guidance or just an understanding listener. How many of us don't even have family to support & help us so why is anyone here giving this parent a hard time. Do you really think that she would restrain her child if she didn't have to? I was trained in pcm many years ago and it is never a decision given lightly, there are many guidelines to follow with safety being #1. My heart aches for what you are going through.

From: Jadzia Borenstein <jadziabbellsouth (DOT) net>To: deniseslist@ yahoogroups. comSent: Saturday, July 18, 2009 10:44:28 PMSubject: standards to the use of reasonable force

I was afraid of this...to say prone restraint does not help the child is not true. If it prevents my daughter from severely injuring herself it does help her. When she tantrums she does not control herself. She has attempted to leave the car through the window as I drove on a highway, has jumped into the front seat and punched and kicked me as I drove, scratches her neck repeatedly until bleeding profusely across the entire front, bangs her head on whatever is available. Yes I am working with a Behavior Analyst. I get 20 hours per week of a behavior assistant in my home and my daughter spends her afterschool hours at the ARC where they have Behavior Therapists and assistants on staff. She has a good behavior plan by a board certified behavior analyst but, I don't expect her behavior to change over night. We are working at trying to change this behavior. Restraint is both needed and

necessary. She is restrained at all locations because she behaves the same across all areas of her life. I was restraining her myself before I ever heard of PCM. Now because of her size I can't without help and PCM ( I have learned) is not done alone. I invite anyone to my home to show me a "better, safer " way of dealing with her behavior, it's easy to write something but unless you have watched my kid in action you can't say what is needed. I don't enjoy this but it is the safest thing I have found and I intend to use it and allow it to be used until her behavior changes and she isn't hurting herself or anyone else.

Jayne, Mom to the STILL NOT SLEEPING at 10:40 pm Miki

July 28, 2009

Hi:

I am not a single Mom but oh boy I need a night out.

Jeannette

To: sList Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 1:21:01 PMSubject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

Absolutely. Although my divorce etc happened many years ago and my daughter is doing so well and I now have a really great man who is so good with her - there are times when only another mom going through the trials & tribulations can be the "hug" that we need and the "you are doing a great job" that we also need to hear can be a warm bath for our souls.

PS I live in the central broward area.

Cheryl

From: Costa <JeanCbellsouth (DOT) net>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 11:32:45 AMSubject: was: Restraint now: single moms

Being a single parent in any circumstances is filled with challenges ..it is not always easy. Having a child with a different ability and mixing in issues of divorce, separation, and dual parenting... can be very difficult..ot to mention the emotional and financial aspects. I think there are many of us out there who are in the same position. Single Moms want to try and plan a night out? for friendship, support, to exchange resources etc. Anyone else think this is a good idea..let me know..

From: Wihlborg <ewihlborgyahoo (DOT) com>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 9:37:19 AMSubject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

Jayne,

I can not imagine how hard it has been for you with your daughter, We all seem to have our own heartaches and decisions we have to make to ensure our kids are going to be ok. I have been reading through the posts and I do not know how you do it. I have a wonderful 6 year old boy, who is in the cluster program at our local public school, with health issues that can not go away. I do not know what I am doing, do not know how to deal with his health issues and Autism and I am seperating from my husband. You seem like a very strong woman and I hope that I will be that soon.

From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Monday, July 20, 2009 2:01:02 PMSubject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

You are caring for your child as a loving parent and want what is best for your child. I don't think there are any of us who would not want the best for our children, whether it is diet, meds, pcm, or even releasing into a group home. Who are we to judge? It is extremely hard on the parent to not be given support/guidance or just an understanding listener. How many of us don't even have family to support & help us so why is anyone here giving this parent a hard time. Do you really think that she would restrain her child if she didn't have to? I was trained in pcm many years ago and it is never a decision given lightly, there are many guidelines to follow with safety being #1. My heart aches for what you are going through.

From: Jadzia Borenstein <jadziabbellsouth (DOT) net>To: deniseslist@ yahoogroups. comSent: Saturday, July 18, 2009 10:44:28 PMSubject: standards to the use of reasonable force

I was afraid of this...to say prone restraint does not help the child is not true. If it prevents my daughter from severely injuring herself it does help her. When she tantrums she does not control herself. She has attempted to leave the car through the window as I drove on a highway, has jumped into the front seat and punched and kicked me as I drove, scratches her neck repeatedly until bleeding profusely across the entire front, bangs her head on whatever is available. Yes I am working with a Behavior Analyst. I get 20 hours per week of a behavior assistant in my home and my daughter spends her afterschool hours at the ARC where they have Behavior Therapists and assistants on staff. She has a good behavior plan by a board certified behavior analyst but, I don't expect her behavior to change over night. We are working at trying to change this behavior. Restraint is both needed and

necessary. She is restrained at all locations because she behaves the same across all areas of her life. I was restraining her myself before I ever heard of PCM. Now because of her size I can't without help and PCM ( I have learned) is not done alone. I invite anyone to my home to show me a "better, safer " way of dealing with her behavior, it's easy to write something but unless you have watched my kid in action you can't say what is needed. I don't enjoy this but it is the safest thing I have found and I intend to use it and allow it to be used until her behavior changes and she isn't hurting herself or anyone else.

Jayne, Mom to the STILL NOT SLEEPING at 10:40 pm Miki

July 29, 2009

Cheryl,

My husband and I just split up and boy I could use a night out. I live in central broward as well.

To: sList Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 5:26:45 PMSubject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

Hi:

I am not a single Mom but oh boy I need a night out.

Jeannette

From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 1:21:01 PMSubject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

Absolutely. Although my divorce etc happened many years ago and my daughter is doing so well and I now have a really great man who is so good with her - there are times when only another mom going through the trials & tribulations can be the "hug" that we need and the "you are doing a great job" that we also need to hear can be a warm bath for our souls.

PS I live in the central broward area.

Cheryl

From: Costa <JeanCbellsouth (DOT) net>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 11:32:45 AMSubject: was: Restraint now: single moms

Being a single parent in any circumstances is filled with challenges ..it is not always easy. Having a child with a different ability and mixing in issues of divorce, separation, and dual parenting... can be very difficult..ot to mention the emotional and financial aspects. I think there are many of us out there who are in the same position. Single Moms want to try and plan a night out? for friendship, support, to exchange resources etc. Anyone else think this is a good idea..let me know..

From: Wihlborg <ewihlborgyahoo (DOT) com>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 9:37:19 AMSubject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

Jayne,

I can not imagine how hard it has been for you with your daughter, We all seem to have our own heartaches and decisions we have to make to ensure our kids are going to be ok. I have been reading through the posts and I do not know how you do it. I have a wonderful 6 year old boy, who is in the cluster program at our local public school, with health issues that can not go away. I do not know what I am doing, do not know how to deal with his health issues and Autism and I am seperating from my husband. You seem like a very strong woman and I hope that I will be that soon.

From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>To: sList@ yahoogroups. comSent: Monday, July 20, 2009 2:01:02 PMSubject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

You are caring for your child as a loving parent and want what is best for your child. I don't think there are any of us who would not want the best for our children, whether it is diet, meds, pcm, or even releasing into a group home. Who are we to judge? It is extremely hard on the parent to not be given support/guidance or just an understanding listener. How many of us don't even have family to support & help us so why is anyone here giving this parent a hard time. Do you really think that she would restrain her child if she didn't have to? I was trained in pcm many years ago and it is never a decision given lightly, there are many guidelines to follow with safety being #1. My heart aches for what you are going through.

From: Jadzia Borenstein <jadziabbellsouth (DOT) net>To: deniseslist@ yahoogroups. comSent: Saturday, July 18, 2009 10:44:28 PMSubject: standards to the use of reasonable force

I was afraid of this...to say prone restraint does not help the child is not true. If it prevents my daughter from severely injuring herself it does help her. When she tantrums she does not control herself. She has attempted to leave the car through the window as I drove on a highway, has jumped into the front seat and punched and kicked me as I drove, scratches her neck repeatedly until bleeding profusely across the entire front, bangs her head on whatever is available. Yes I am working with a Behavior Analyst. I get 20 hours per week of a behavior assistant in my home and my daughter spends her afterschool hours at the ARC where they have Behavior Therapists and assistants on staff. She has a good behavior plan by a board certified behavior analyst but, I don't expect her behavior to change over night. We are working at trying to change this behavior. Restraint is both needed and

necessary. She is restrained at all locations because she behaves the same across all areas of her life. I was restraining her myself before I ever heard of PCM. Now because of her size I can't without help and PCM ( I have learned) is not done alone. I invite anyone to my home to show me a "better, safer " way of dealing with her behavior, it's easy to write something but unless you have watched my kid in action you can't say what is needed. I don't enjoy this but it is the safest thing I have found and I intend to use it and allow it to be used until her behavior changes and she isn't hurting herself or anyone else.

Jayne, Mom to the STILL NOT SLEEPING at 10:40 pm Miki

July 30, 2009

-GOOD MORNING LADIES:

MY NAME IS IVONNE I AM NOT SINGLE BUT AM THE MOM OF AN 8 YEAR OLD WHO HAS

AUTISM. I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN... I WOULD BE WILLING TO BABY SIT FOR ANY

OF YOU SO YOU GIRLS CAN GO OUT AND HAVE A GOOD TIME... SO IF ANYONE IS

INTERESTED PLEASE EMAIL ME AND LET ME KNOW.

I LIVE IN BROWARD COUNTY SUNRISE AREA...

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

-- In sList , Wihlborg <ewihlborg@..

..> wrote:

>

> Cheryl,

>

> My husband and I just split up and boy I could use a night out.. I live in

central broward as well.

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: sList

> Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 5:26:45 PM

> Subject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

>

> Hi:

> I am not a single Mom but oh boy I need a night out.

> Jeannette

>

> ________________________________

> From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 1:21:01 PM

> Subject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

>

> Absolutely. Although my divorce etc happened many years ago and my daughter

is doing so well and I now have a really great man who is so good with her

- there are times when only another mom going through the trials & tribulations

can be the " hug " that we need and the " you are doing a great job " that we also

need to hear can be a warm bath for our souls.

> PS I live in the central broward area.

> Cheryl

>

> ________________________________

> From: Costa <JeanCbellsouth (DOT) net>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups.. com

> Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 11:32:45 AM

> Subject: was: Restraint now: single moms

>

> Being a single parent in any circumstances is filled with challenges ..it is

not always easy. Having a child with a different ability and mixing in issues

of divorce, separation, and dual parenting... can be very difficult..ot to

mention the emotional and financial aspects. I think there are many of us out

there who are in the same position. Single Moms want to try and plan a night

out? for friendship, support, to exchange resources etc. Anyone else think

this is a good idea..let me know..

>

> ________________________________

> From: Wihlborg <ewihlborgyahoo (DOT) com>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 9:37:19 AM

> Subject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

>

> Jayne,

>

> I can not imagine how hard it has been for you with your daughter, We all seem

to have our own heartaches and decisions we have to make to ensure our kids are

going to be ok. I have been reading through the posts and I do not know how you

do it. I have a wonderful 6 year old boy, who is in the cluster program at our

local public school, with health issues that can not go away. I do not know

what I am doing, do not know how to deal with his health issues and Autism and I

am seperating from my husband. You seem like a very strong woman and I hope

that I will be that soon.

>

> ________________________________

> From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Monday, July 20, 2009 2:01:02 PM

> Subject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

>

> You are caring for your child as a loving parent and want what is best for

your child. I don't think there are any of us who would not want the best for

our children, whether it is diet, meds, pcm, or even releasing into a group

home. Who are we to judge? It is extremely hard on the parent to not be given

support/guidance or just an understanding listener. How many of us don't even

have family to support & help us so why is anyone here giving this parent a hard

time. Do you really think that she would restrain her child if she didn't have

to? I was trained in pcm many years ago and it is never a decision given

lightly, there are many guidelines to follow with safety being #1. My heart

aches for what you are going through.

>

> ________________________________

> From: Jadzia Borenstein <jadziabbellsouth (DOT) net>

> To: deniseslist@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Saturday, July 18, 2009 10:44:28 PM

> Subject: standards to the use of reasonable force

>

> I was afraid of this...to say prone restraint does not help the child is not

true. If it prevents my daughter from severely injuring herself it does help

her. When she tantrums she does not control herself. She has attempted to

leave the car through the window as I drove on a highway, has jumped into the

front seat and punched and kicked me as I drove, scratches her neck repeatedly

until bleeding profusely across the entire front, bangs her head on whatever is

available. Yes I am working with a Behavior Analyst. I get 20 hours per

week of a behavior assistant in my home and my daughter spends her afterschool

hours at the ARC where they have Behavior Therapists and assistants on staff.

She has a good behavior plan by a board certified behavior analyst but, I don't

expect her behavior to change over night.. We are working at trying to change

this behavior. Restraint is both needed and necessary. She is restrained at

all locations because

> she behaves the same across all areas of her life. I was restraining her

myself before I ever heard of PCM. Now because of her size I can't without help

and PCM ( I have learned) is not done alone. I invite anyone to my home to show

me a " better, safer " way of dealing with her behavior, it's easy to write

something but unless you have watched my kid in action you can't say what is

needed. I don't enjoy this but it is the safest thing I have found and I intend

to use it and allow it to be used until her behavior changes and she isn't

hurting herself or anyone else.

>

> Jayne, Mom to the STILL NOT SLEEPING at 10:40 pm Miki

>

July 30, 2009

I'm reading all the comments on this post and I'm so sad so many of you are having to go through these difficult times in your lives single. I read about the high % of parents who get divorced when a special needs child is involved. My heart goes out to you all.

I am not familiar with PCM or Prone restraint. I think we definitely have to walk a mile in someones shoes before ever adding our 2 cents. It's tough enough being a parent of a special needs child without the support of everyone else around us. I feel so guilty when my anger flares up b/c of my son's tantrums. When I step back I can say ok, act like this, feel like that, but in the heat of the tantrum when he's hitting me or kicking me..... it is one of if not the hardest thing I've ever gone through.

love to you all.

Rose

President, Sleep Safe Bed inc.

The easy to use zippered enclosure keeps your sleeper safe in his/her own bed and prevents them from unattended wandering. This gives your sleeper the freedom to wind down and go to sleep on their own.

To learn more, click on

The Safety Sleeper

www.thesafetysleeper.com

--- standards to the use of reasonable force> > > I was afraid of this...to say prone restraint does not help the child is not true. If it prevents my daughter from severely injuring herself it does help her. When she tantrums she does not control herself. She has attempted to leave the car through the window as I drove on a highway, has jumped into the front seat and punched and kicked me as I drove, scratches her neck repeatedly until bleeding profusely across the entire front, bangs her head on whatever is available. Yes I am working with a Behavior Analyst. I get 20 hours per week of a behavior assistant in my home and my daughter spends her afterschool hours at the ARC where they have Behavior Therapists and assistants on staff. She has a good behavior plan by a board certified behavior analyst but, I don't expect her behavior to change over night.. We are working at trying to change this behavior. Restraint is both needed and necessary. She is restrained at all locations because> she behaves the same across all areas of her life. I was restraining her myself before I ever heard of PCM. Now because of her size I can't without help and PCM ( I have learned) is not done alone. I invite anyone to my home to show me a "better, safer " way of dealing with her behavior, it's easy to write something but unless you have watched my kid in action you can't say what is needed. I don't enjoy this but it is the safest thing I have found and I intend to use it and allow it to be used until her behavior changes and she isn't hurting herself or anyone else.> > Jayne, Mom to the STILL NOT SLEEPING at 10:40 pm Miki>

July 31, 2009

I would like to get together with other single moms also. Great idea!!

I'm reading all the comments on this post and I'm so sad so many of you are having to go through these difficult times in your lives single. I read about the high % of parents who get divorced when a special needs child is involved. My heart goes out to you all.

I am not familiar with PCM or Prone restraint. I think we definitely have to walk a mile in someones shoes before ever adding our 2 cents. It's tough enough being a parent of a special needs child without the support of everyone else around us. I feel so guilty when my anger flares up b/c of my son's tantrums. When I step back I can say ok, act like this, feel like that, but in the heat of the tantrum when he's hitting me or kicking me..... it is one of if not the hardest thing I've ever gone through.

love to you all.

Rose

President, Sleep Safe Bed inc.

The easy to use zippered enclosure keeps your sleeper safe in his/her own bed and prevents them from unattended wandering. This gives your sleeper the freedom to wind down and go to sleep on their own.

To learn more, click on

The Safety Sleeper

www.thesafetysleeper.com

--- standards to the use of reasonable force> > > I was afraid of this...to say prone restraint does not help the child is not true. If it prevents my daughter from severely injuring herself it does help her. When she tantrums she does not control herself. She has attempted to leave the car through the window as I drove on a highway, has jumped into the front seat and punched and kicked me as I drove, scratches her neck repeatedly until bleeding profusely across the entire front, bangs her head on whatever is available. Yes I am working with a Behavior Analyst. I get 20 hours per week of a behavior assistant in my home and my daughter spends her afterschool hours at the ARC where they have Behavior Therapists and assistants on staff. She has a good behavior plan by a board certified behavior analyst but, I don't expect her behavior to change over night.. We are working at trying to change this behavior. Restraint is both needed and necessary. She is restrained at all locations because

> she behaves the same across all areas of her life. I was restraining her myself before I ever heard of PCM. Now because of her size I can't without help and PCM ( I have learned) is not done alone. I invite anyone to my home to show me a " better, safer " way of dealing with her behavior, it's easy to write something but unless you have watched my kid in action you can't say what is needed. I don't enjoy this but it is the safest thing I have found and I intend to use it and allow it to be used until her behavior changes and she isn't hurting herself or anyone else.

> > Jayne, Mom to the STILL NOT SLEEPING at 10:40 pm Miki>

July 31, 2009

Rose, what an amazing thing to be able to

be aware of and do (even if it isn’t easy)…

… ”When I step back I can say ok, act like this, feel like that”,

I love how you can separate the feeling

from the doing or at least make the attempt. Think it is a great thought to lean

on during those crazy moments when we feel like we are going to lose it. Will definitely

use this.

Thanks!

From: sList [mailto:sList ] On Behalf Of Caroline Hopton

Sent: Friday, July 31, 2009 5:49

PM

To: sList

Subject: Re: Re:

was: Restraint now: single moms

I would like to get together with other single moms

also. Great idea!!

On Thu, Jul 30, 2009 at 3:50 PM, <rosethesafetysleeper>

wrote:

I'm reading all the comments on this post and I'm so sad so many

of you are having to go through these difficult times in your lives

single. I read about the high % of parents who get divorced when a

special needs child is involved. My heart goes out to you all.

I am not familiar with PCM or Prone restraint. I think we

definitely have to walk a mile in someones shoes before ever adding our 2

cents. It's tough enough being a parent of a special needs child without

the support of everyone else around us. I feel so guilty when my anger

flares up b/c of my son's tantrums. When I step back I can say ok, act

like this, feel like that, but in the heat of the tantrum when he's hitting me

or kicking me..... it is one of if not the hardest thing I've ever gone through.

love to you all.

Rose

President, Sleep Safe Bed inc.

The easy to use zippered enclosure keeps your sleeper safe in

his/her own bed and prevents them from unattended wandering. This gives your

sleeper the freedom to wind down and go to sleep on their own.

To learn more, click on

The Safety Sleeper

www.thesafetysleeper.com

--------

Original Message --------

Subject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

From: " Ivonne Moran " <mytoothaches2003>

Date: Thu, July 30, 2009 9:45 am

To: sList

-GOOD MORNING LADIES:

MY NAME IS IVONNE I AM NOT SINGLE BUT AM THE MOM OF AN 8 YEAR OLD WHO HAS

AUTISM. I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU MEAN... I WOULD BE WILLING TO BABY SIT FOR ANY

OF YOU SO YOU GIRLS CAN GO OUT AND HAVE A GOOD TIME... SO IF ANYONE IS

INTERESTED PLEASE EMAIL ME AND LET ME KNOW.

I LIVE IN BROWARD COUNTY SUNRISE

AREA...

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

-- In sList ,

Wihlborg <ewihlborg@..

..> wrote:

>

> Cheryl,

>

> My husband and I just split up and boy I could use a night out.. I live in

central broward as well.

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: sList

> Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 5:26:45 PM

> Subject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

>

> Hi:

> I am not a single Mom but oh boy I need a night out.

> Jeannette

>

> ________________________________

> From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 1:21:01 PM

> Subject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

>

> Absolutely. Although my divorce etc happened many years ago and my

daughter is doing so well and I now have a really great man who is so good

with her - there are times when only another mom going through the trials

& tribulations can be the " hug " that we need and the " you

are doing a great job " that we also need to hear can be a warm bath for

our souls.

> PS I live in the central broward area.

> Cheryl

>

> ________________________________

> From: Costa <JeanCbellsouth (DOT) net>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups.. com

> Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 11:32:45 AM

> Subject: was: Restraint now: single moms

>

> Being a single parent in any circumstances is filled with challenges ..it

is not always easy. Having a child with a different ability and mixing in

issues of divorce, separation, and dual parenting... can be very difficult..ot

to mention the emotional and financial aspects. I think there are many of

us out there who are in the same position. Single Moms want to try and

plan a night out? for friendship, support, to exchange resources

etc. Anyone else think this is a good idea..let me

know..

>

> ________________________________

> From: Wihlborg <ewihlborgyahoo (DOT) com>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 9:37:19 AM

> Subject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

>

> Jayne,

>

> I can not imagine how hard it has been for you with your daughter, We all

seem to have our own heartaches and decisions we have to make to ensure our

kids are going to be ok. I have been reading through the posts and I do

not know how you do it. I have a wonderful 6 year old boy, who is in the

cluster program at our local public school, with health issues that can not go

away. I do not know what I am doing, do not know how to deal with his

health issues and Autism and I am seperating from my husband. You seem

like a very strong woman and I hope that I will be that soon.

>

> ________________________________

> From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>

> To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Monday, July 20, 2009 2:01:02 PM

> Subject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

>

> You are caring for your child as a loving parent and want what is best for

your child. I don't think there are any of us who would not want the best

for our children, whether it is diet, meds, pcm, or even releasing into a group

home. Who are we to judge? It is extremely hard on the parent to

not be given support/guidance or just an understanding listener. How many

of us don't even have family to support & help us so why is anyone

here giving this parent a hard time. Do you really think that she

would restrain her child if she didn't have to? I was trained in pcm many

years ago and it is never a decision given lightly, there are many guidelines

to follow with safety being #1. My heart aches for what you are going

through.

>

> ________________________________

> From: Jadzia Borenstein <jadziabbellsouth (DOT) net>

> To: deniseslist@ yahoogroups. com

> Sent: Saturday, July 18, 2009 10:44:28 PM

> Subject: standards to the use of reasonable force

>

> I was afraid of this...to say prone restraint does not help the child is

not true. If it prevents my daughter from severely injuring herself it

does help her. When she tantrums she does not control herself. She

has attempted to leave the car through the window as I drove on a highway, has

jumped into the front seat and punched and kicked me as I drove, scratches her

neck repeatedly until bleeding profusely across the entire front, bangs her

head on whatever is available. Yes I am working with a Behavior

Analyst. I get 20 hours per week of a behavior assistant in my home

and my daughter spends her afterschool hours at the ARC where they have Behavior

Therapists and assistants on staff. She has a good behavior plan by a

board certified behavior analyst but, I don't expect her behavior to

change over night.. We are working at trying to change this

behavior. Restraint is both needed and necessary. She is restrained

at all locations because

> she behaves the same across all areas of her life. I was restraining

her myself before I ever heard of PCM. Now because of her size I can't

without help and PCM ( I have learned) is not done alone. I invite anyone

to my home to show me a " better, safer " way of dealing with her

behavior, it's easy to write something but unless you have watched my kid in

action you can't say what is needed. I don't enjoy this but it is

the safest thing I have found and I intend to use it and allow it to be used

until her behavior changes and she isn't hurting herself or anyone else.

>

> Jayne, Mom to the STILL NOT SLEEPING at 10:40 pm Miki

>

No virus found in this incoming message.

Checked by AVG - www.avg.com

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August 1, 2009

Wow Ivonne, what a generous offer.

> >

> > Cheryl,

> >

> > My husband and I just split up and boy I could use a night out.. I live in

central broward as well.

> >

> > ________________________________

> > From: jeannette vanoy <janvanoy@>

> > To: sList

> > Sent: Tuesday, July 28, 2009 5:26:45 PM

> > Subject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

> >

> > Hi:

> > I am not a single Mom but oh boy I need a night out.

> > Jeannette

> >

> > ________________________________

> > From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>

> > To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> > Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 1:21:01 PM

> > Subject: Re: was: Restraint now: single moms

> >

> > Absolutely. Although my divorce etc happened many years ago and my daughter

is doing so well and I now have a really great man who is so good with her

- there are times when only another mom going through the trials & tribulations

can be the " hug " that we need and the " you are doing a great job " that we also

need to hear can be a warm bath for our souls.

> > PS I live in the central broward area.

> > Cheryl

> >

> > ________________________________

> > From: Costa <JeanCbellsouth (DOT) net>

> > To: sList@ yahoogroups.. com

> > Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 11:32:45 AM

> > Subject: was: Restraint now: single moms

> >

> > Being a single parent in any circumstances is filled with challenges ..it is

not always easy. Having a child with a different ability and mixing in issues

of divorce, separation, and dual parenting... can be very difficult..ot to

mention the emotional and financial aspects. I think there are many of us out

there who are in the same position. Single Moms want to try and plan a night

out? for friendship, support, to exchange resources etc. Anyone else think

this is a good idea..let me know..

> >

> > ________________________________

> > From: Wihlborg <ewihlborgyahoo (DOT) com>

> > To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> > Sent: Wednesday, July 22, 2009 9:37:19 AM

> > Subject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

> >

> > Jayne,

> >

> > I can not imagine how hard it has been for you with your daughter, We all

seem to have our own heartaches and decisions we have to make to ensure our kids

are going to be ok. I have been reading through the posts and I do not know how

you do it. I have a wonderful 6 year old boy, who is in the cluster program at

our local public school, with health issues that can not go away. I do not know

what I am doing, do not know how to deal with his health issues and Autism and I

am seperating from my husband. You seem like a very strong woman and I hope

that I will be that soon.

> >

> > ________________________________

> > From: cheryl <otnsuyahoo (DOT) com>

> > To: sList@ yahoogroups. com

> > Sent: Monday, July 20, 2009 2:01:02 PM

> > Subject: Re: standards to the use of reasonable force

> >

> > You are caring for your child as a loving parent and want what is best for