Ammends was Re: Oxford House: Govt Supported 12 Step Homes

[Guest guest]

Hey coolguy. That Tina quote caught my eye too.

I hope you realize we could have a spirited discussion about the

12-step concept of making amends I think you are being too hard on

yourself below. You--all of us--did what we thought was right at the

time. I can't see passing judgment or casting blame on people whose

beliefs have changed over time, because that happens to everyone. My

sense is that the majority of Americans still believe 12 step groups

are the be-all end-all in terms of recovery from addictive behavior,

not because they are bad or stupid but because, in my opinion, they

want a simple answer to a complex, extremely disturbing issue:

drug addiction and dependence, and the many harmful conditions

associated with addiction.

However, I would like to do more research and find out what evidence

exists to support AA's effectiveness, as well as evidence that

supports the harm caused by AA. I think if facts, such as they are,

are available to people, people will make the best choices they can.

judith

> Wow, thanks for showing that link, Judith! The writer gave his

reasons for the essay, then gave some background, scenery. The first

real point I saw was that nobody is required to grant the sanction of

the victim. Those rape victims and battered women who first stood up

and spoke up about their rights - those who FORCED the issue - have

done a great service to every woman since (and men, too, indirectly,

by causing them to behave more like men, less like animals). That

until someone does stand up and force the issue, whatever form of

victimization he is suffering from will remain in the dark. So, if we

keep forcing our issues with AA, we will be heard, eventually, louder

and louder.

> Then the author quoted leggy pop music sensation Tina ,

" being with Ike was like being in a small cult. "

> I could picture myself in Ike's or Tina's place; either one made

me feel like I was dispicable.

> OK, so, I am man, not an animal. I don't want to abuse people -

it's wrong to abuse people. I owe some ammends to some human beings I

have harmed during my time in AA, don't I? I suppose that is one

reason it is difficult to let go of the lies of XA (or anything else

bad) - that by admitting I was wrong, I not only admit I believed

wrong - that I was fooled, I must also admit I did wrong. I was a

stepper. I was telling the same lies. I pushed those lies on others.

I helped brainwash people. I helped perpetuate this monstrosity we

call XA. Kinda like a Nazi or a KKK guy. I feel pissed about that.

That I lost control of my faculties to the point that I was helping

brainwash people for someone else's ends. I am glad I escaped, but

sorry for the harm I caused. Though my part was miniscule in the

whole scope of AA, I did do my part; I have to be responsible for

that. I'd like to go to those people I used to know and say I am

sorry I helped reinforce that bullshit in their head. But would that

do any good? Wouldn't they just rebel? Isn't it the least I can do

to help them get away, too? To help dismantle AA - to steal away its

members? They might get mad, they might not listen, but eventullay

that part inside them which seeks knowledge might give into the

possibility that I am right - and they might start thinking for

themselves again. Maybe I will make some ammends one day, after all.