Re: I want to try to go NC again

[Guest guest]

Thank you everyone for all the great replies and advice!!

I'm not sure yet if I'm going total NC or just (much more) LC in the long run,

but for now I'm NC.

I really agree I need to work more on setting boundries with my dad and brother

to keep from getting back to my nada. The last time I've tried this, my brother

was a teenager and still living at home. He ended up getting a lot of my nada's

anger towards me directed at HIM so he did want me to " make up " with her so HIS

life could be more pleasant. However, he is now an adult and on his own, so I

think it might be easier. He has given me the " but she's our mother " line but I

just explain that it's not MY fault she's my mother - I didn't ask to be born

from her.

Also when I told my father this time I was tired of nada and didn't really want

to deal with her anymore, he just said, " Yeah, I understand " . No trying to

convince me to that she needs me like he usually does.

Casey

> > >

> > > I'm just so tired of my nada. She's emotionally draining. Last time I

tried to go NC and my dad and brother guilted me back - " oh, she's so alone, she

has no one else " - true, but her own damn fault.

> > >

> > > Last night I picked her up from the airport and had to listen to her

raging the whole way back. Trying to throw herself out of the car, which me and

my dad ignored (she's overly dramatic) and then complaining that we don't care

about her because we didn't try to keep her from doing it. Then she claimed I

said " just get rid of her " when she was doing that. lol.

> > >

> > > She also has these wild conspiracy theories about me and my dad. Some of

it is sexual! she's completely disturbed.

> > >

> > > Anyway I could probably complain about her for a million pages. I have

been having dinner with her once a week, but it's never enough for her. Once a

week for her becomes " an hour every other month " . Every time I call, she

complains I don't call, every time I visit, she complains I don't visit. What's

the point?? I'm NEVER going to be what she wants, she has some fantasy of a

super loving daughter who is her best friend - she complains I don't invite her

on my DATES.

> > >

> > > Ever since I joined this board (4 or 5 years ago) and heard how some of

you went NC, I've wanted to do it. I've tried a few times, and it's so PEACEFUL

getting a break from her. And hearing how much better off those of you that are

NC are... I'm jealous. I mean, I want a mother, but she is not one.

> > >

> > > I just can't help feeling sorry for her. I can't help feeling I'm being a

selfish daughter. I know eventually she is going to apologize, but her apologies

mean nothing to me anymore. I even know I can get her apologize and " make up " by

calling her and apologizing. Even though I'm not sorry. even though everything I

said to her I mean and is true. I'm tired of the " sorry game " . It's so

pointless.

> > >

> > > Any tips for going NC for real this time?

> > >

> > > Casey

> > >

> >

>