Guest guest Posted September 13, 2010 Report Share Posted September 13, 2010 Casey, meditation when you first start allows the mind to relax enough for things to " bubble up " from the depths. Sometimes the things that bubble up can be very unpleasant - things that you were successfully keeping at bay by being busy or other escape means. The usual advice is to just keep focusing on your breath and hold steady while whatever it is finishes and releases after which you will have real healing. I can imagine that would be very hard to ride out a panic attack! One idea you could try starting with more mind focused rather than body focused techniques - like mantra or focused visualization. That might allow you to build up enough focus to then handle what comes up from the body. I often find nada related trauma held in my body - if I focus on a particular knot of tension suddenly a whole slew of images and feelings burst out. Can be a bit intense but helpful too. > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > Casey > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 13, 2010 Report Share Posted September 13, 2010 That's odd that you should mention that reaction, because I too have felt a similarly anxious/nervous/jittery feeling when attempting to do that " just breathe and relax and let your mind go blank " thing. Huh. I remember hiding from my nada out of fear, on several occasions when I was a little kid. Maybe being very still and quiet and just hearing my own heartbeat and breathing triggers the terror, like a ptsd flashback: trying desperately to be silent so I wouldn't be found, dragged out into the open and physically assaulted. Our own breathing and our own heartbeat can sound rather loud to us when we're in a very quiet environment and state. -Annie > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > Casey > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 Perhaps I will try some of those methods. I guess it wouldn't surprise me that my mind is hiding unpleasant things from the surface. But after I get panicky from an activity, it's very hard for me to try again, because I'm nervous right from the start. But I really feel I need more relaxing techniques in my arsenal. Sometimes I forget to relax and really have to force myself to just chill. Casey > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > Casey > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 You know, you might have something there. My nada didn't ever get physical with me, but I was terrified of her nonetheless. She would tell me things like that my dead great-grandma was taking over her body and coming to kill me (she would even brandish a huge knife) and I would be scared for my life. And when you're hiding, you DO really just hear your breath in and out, and your heart beating.... it could totally be just too similar to that when I try to focus on my breathing. Casey > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > Casey > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 You know, you might have something there. My nada didn't ever get physical with me, but I was terrified of her nonetheless. She would tell me things like that my dead great-grandma was taking over her body and coming to kill me (she would even brandish a huge knife) and I would be scared for my life. And when you're hiding, you DO really just hear your breath in and out, and your heart beating.... it could totally be just too similar to that when I try to focus on my breathing. Casey > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > Casey > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 Having an adult (your own mother, for heaven's sake) wave a knife at you and tell you that she is being possessed by the ghost of your dead evil grandmother and is going to kill you... My dear, that is terrorism, a distinct form of emotional abuse. And its psychological torture. And its sadistic. You were terrorized and emotionally tortured by your own mother. Its the buildup of fear and abject, animal terror generated by one's own parent that generates " off-the-Richter-scale " emotional damage, unless your parent is also so low-functioning and out-of-control that he or she literally beats you nearly to death. My nada was able to beat Sister and me with the belt without having the marks show, the bruises and welts and sometimes broken skin were on the backs of our thighs and buttocks, but it was the terror beforehand that was worse than the beating itself. -Annie > > > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > > > Casey > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 I'm so sorry your nada did that to you. No one deserves that. I wish there was something we could do to rescue all the children currently in the situation we were once in. Casey > > > > > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > > > > > Casey > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 Casey, sure I can see why you'd be nervous around the whole thing at this point. In case you do want to try again here's one of my favorite non-body focused meditations. Trust me it will focus and relax you. 1. Get comfy lying down or in a chair, close your eyes, normally I'd say focus on your breathing for a few minutes but in your case, don't do it! 2. Imagine you are sitting on a bench on a path looking over a great cliff, big expanse of blue sky in front of you (but you aren't in danger of falling off) 3. Imagine a big yellow cube in the sky in front of you. Make it whatever shade of yellow you want, choose what texture it has, imagine what it looks like from every angle. 4. Next, put a white sphere on top of the yellow cube. Again choose details...is it frosted glass, styrofoam, a ping pong ball, does it glow? Now hold the visualization of both clearly in your mind. 5. Next put a red cone on top of the white sphere. Again detail it up. now hold the stack of three clearly in your mind with all their details...see them. 6. Next put a green solid bowl shape balanced on top of the red cone. Same thing... 7. Last but not least, put a sparkly jewel on top of the green bowl. Now try to hold the image of the whole stack with all it's details floating in the sky as long as you like. The trick here is that as you add each item, it takes more and more brain power to visualize the whole stack clearly. Simply even the effort to do this even if you can't do the whole thing is really beneficial. Have fun! > > > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > > > Casey > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 Casey, sure I can see why you'd be nervous around the whole thing at this point. In case you do want to try again here's one of my favorite non-body focused meditations. Trust me it will focus and relax you. 1. Get comfy lying down or in a chair, close your eyes, normally I'd say focus on your breathing for a few minutes but in your case, don't do it! 2. Imagine you are sitting on a bench on a path looking over a great cliff, big expanse of blue sky in front of you (but you aren't in danger of falling off) 3. Imagine a big yellow cube in the sky in front of you. Make it whatever shade of yellow you want, choose what texture it has, imagine what it looks like from every angle. 4. Next, put a white sphere on top of the yellow cube. Again choose details...is it frosted glass, styrofoam, a ping pong ball, does it glow? Now hold the visualization of both clearly in your mind. 5. Next put a red cone on top of the white sphere. Again detail it up. now hold the stack of three clearly in your mind with all their details...see them. 6. Next put a green solid bowl shape balanced on top of the red cone. Same thing... 7. Last but not least, put a sparkly jewel on top of the green bowl. Now try to hold the image of the whole stack with all it's details floating in the sky as long as you like. The trick here is that as you add each item, it takes more and more brain power to visualize the whole stack clearly. Simply even the effort to do this even if you can't do the whole thing is really beneficial. Have fun! > > > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > > > Casey > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 OMG that's awful Casey....I can't even imagine. No wonder you have PTSD. So sorry that happened to you, do you think EMDR might help? > > > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > > > Casey > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 14, 2010 Report Share Posted September 14, 2010 I have never heard of EMDR - I just looked it up now though. Interesting, perhaps I will look further into it. I'm not in therapy at this moment (no insurance) but I have been for years and the one thing I learned that works really good is cognitive therapy. I haven't actually had any panic attacks in a long time. Maybe when I can afford to get back in therapy I will look for a therapist that does EMDR. It sounds very fascinating. " When the distressing or traumatic event is an isolated, single incident, approximately three sessions are necessary for comprehensive treatment. " That is pretty amazing. Of course, I have no idea how many " traumatic incidents " I have. I've been told by therapists before that I'll probably need therapy the rest of my life. (at least I don't have BPD is all I can say!!) And I'm totally going to try that non-body focused meditation you described. Thank you. Casey > > > > > > > > This is a little OT, but I've seen people mention yoga and meditation for healing and I was just wondering if this is a KO thing or just me... I tried a yoga class once and it induced a major panic attack. The same thing when I tried meditating. Something about focusing on myself, and breathing in and out and focusing on that... it makes no sense to me it sounds so counter-intuitive! Isn't it supposed to be relaxing?? > > > > > > > > Most of my panic attacks are related to childhood events from nada, but I have no idea what this one is about. > > > > > > > > Casey > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted September 15, 2010 Report Share Posted September 15, 2010 Wow>>> i thought i was the only one! i wouldnt even think to bring the topic up but i am glad you did. I hate yoga and exercise because it reminds me of trauma somehow...well maybe that my heart races and that starts my ptsd up in a fury! I like what Annie said... my note is eft is good>>> actually I am a practitioner. try it... it is free to learn. just google EFT! learn it on you tube>>> for some reason eft makes you more comfortable in your own skin! my experience with emdr did not get the same results>>>it didnt help my panic at all...but that is just me! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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