Re: Re: Serious Business

[Guest guest]

Karyn:

Ed and I read the story in The NY Times the other day.

We never thought about the ramifications of the situation with respect to his

patients with legitimate needs for pain relief.

What a horror!

-E

[Guest guest]

Karyn:

Ed and I read the story in The NY Times the other day.

We never thought about the ramifications of the situation with respect to his

patients with legitimate needs for pain relief.

What a horror!

-E

[Guest guest]

I have an idea.

Why not go to the media to discuss your plight?

As I've stated in the past, I've had to do just that in the past.

-E

[Guest guest]

I have an idea.

Why not go to the media to discuss your plight?

As I've stated in the past, I've had to do just that in the past.

-E

[Guest guest]

I have an idea.

Why not go to the media to discuss your plight?

As I've stated in the past, I've had to do just that in the past.

-E

[Guest guest]

Dear Karyn,

For what it's worth, these are still only accusations, and he DOES live

in a country where he is innocent until proven guilty.

At this point, from the article, I don't think we are able to discern the

facts about his knowledge, intent, or degree of illegal activity. There are

charges, but I'd surely like to hear his response, and know a lot more about

where this leads and most importantly, the outcome resolved from more

thoroughly investigated and court-proven fact. I can only suggest perhaps

exercising some caution and reservation of judgment until a good deal more is

discovered or proven.

Obviously you cared (care) for this physician, trusted him and depended

on him a great deal. When I read your post my stomach did a couple

flip-flops too, so I realize that I can't even imagine the level of your own

fear, frustration, anger and upheaval right now.

I can relate, though on a smaller scale, and to some degree I can

understand.

I sought out, with a great deal of effort and hard work, a pain

management center and doctor a few months ago, and was elated when it

appeared that I had finally found a situation that was going to work properly

regarding pain management. Aside from adequate pain control with medication,

I was also excited about what the plan offered with physical therapy, various

alternative options (medication, biofeedback, etc.), psychiatric assistance

with regard to drug management, physical history, planning for the future;

working with my GI, surgeon and PCP in the NOW, etc... Sort of a clearing

house for all sorts of things actually, which not only gave me hope but also

cleared the path for the insurance company, my own mental health and

security, etc. For the first time in many months, I felt a huge burden

lifted and was able to let out a great (proverbial and literal) sigh.

I met with that doctor twice, and her recommended psychiatrist once.

The doctor herself, I soon discovered, had two very distinct

personalities... One for patients behind closed doors, and one for all other

parties. She prescribed for me what she thought would be appropriate (she

took me off of OxyContin 40x2 twice daily and put me on a megadose of

morphine and methadone). I was very concerned, because I quickly became

little more than a zombie with managable pain. Useless, confused, and

practically unintelligible. I made an emergency appointment soon thereafter

and took my best friend and sponsor with me to act on my behalf, as I knew I

had no defense against her in this condition. She quickly made it appear

that I was abusing multiple Rx's, taking more than prescribed, etc.

Fortunately, I carry my Rx history with me to all appointments with

physicians, and the truth was right there before her in black and white, but

still she insisted that I was trying to manipulating her, blah blah blah.

She turned out to be an incredible liar, and her behavior toward her patient

(ME, damnit!) was incredibly reprehensible... and this is only the tip of the

iceberg. Regardless, she insisted that I come back in the next week but that

I come " by myself " , or that all medications would be stopped as of that day,

she would call my pharmacist, PCP, etc... What a nasty woman.

I had long since stopped taking the morphine and methadone, told her to

call anybody that she wanted to call, and that not only would I not be coming

in to see her the next week but that I'd not be coming in to see her ever

again, and that a letter describing the entire relationship history had

already been sent to the director of the program, my GI, PCP and the AMA.

Apparently she already had a file with them, but I still don't know (or

really care at this point) where any of that stands. I'll do anything that

they ask of me, if they do, but for my own sake I've since done my best to

move on. Unfortunately, I'm still shopping for a good PM program... but how

do you know?? She was with a reccommended program at one of our leading

hospitals! Good apples and bad apples wherever one goes.

Anyway, I'm sorry to go on so. The point of all that is to say that I

can sympathize with the feeling of " betrayal " from a pain management

physician who, for those of us in the position that we are in, really has us

by the proverbial " balls. "

It's a horrible, gut-wrenching feeling, and I was left with despair, fear

and a feeling like I was left out dangling in the wind with no security, no

place to call home and no safety net whatsoever. I was incredibly angry.

But, Karyn, as you know, underneath everything, was the fear. Fear. And

most of it around pain control. Definitely one of the biggest dragons facing

us.

I still have not found another pain management group, my COBRA insurance

runs out at the end of February, and I have no idea what happens after that.

I've been denied by a couple different insurance companies, been told

that the " High Risk " state pool is my best option, and don't have any idea

how I could afford that possibility, with monthly premiums from $200 ($5,000

deductible) to $600 ($500 deductible)… Now who the hell can afford that? A

sick, unemployed, low-to-no-income 37 year old who has exhausted all

resources and assets? Hmm… No, I don't think so... At least not THIS one!!

Hopefully Medicaid will take me on, I'm just trying to figure out now how

to demonstrate that I have no income. I can't get anybody to understand via

phone that I DON'T HAVE anybody sending me monthly notices saying " HEY! YOU

are not employed, and WE are not sending you ANY MONEY, so here is your

proof, dated and notarized! " Hahaha... Nobody gets that. Do you all know

something that I don't, and have some number to a secret organization sending

you those types of monthly notices??

Anyway, Karyn, I'm sorry to use your drama as an opportunity to vent

about mine.

Underneath all of it, I DO try to remind myself of that which you don't

really care to hear right now. " It WILL be okay. Somehow, it will be fine. "

It always is, somehow I've always managed to be okay. I'm still

breathing and walking and moving, and I'm not on the street yet, and since I

don't ever seem to want anything to eat anyway, I guess I don't have to worry

about going hungry!!

And though I've never met you and don't really know you, I'm guessing

that chances are you'll be okay too.

I'll certainly continue to pray for you, and the other folks here, just

in case. <g>

Please be well and along from the prayers, I wish you good luck as well.

Peace and Love,

Terry in KC'

<< I have been torn as to sharing my current physician situation. The entire

thing has been beyond my belief. Some of you may have heard. >>

[Guest guest]

Egad! I don't have a " stash " other than perhaps just an extra couple of

days worth of medication in the bottle, so I never thought about this

angle... Leave it to Ponch. Yikes. Good thing to consider.

Terry in KC

<< Also If there is such a think as a personal stash I would think very

carefully as to where it might be physically located, somebody might want to

search and find one from one of this doctors patients, just for the publicity

with this case. >>

[Guest guest]

Egad! I don't have a " stash " other than perhaps just an extra couple of

days worth of medication in the bottle, so I never thought about this

angle... Leave it to Ponch. Yikes. Good thing to consider.

Terry in KC

<< Also If there is such a think as a personal stash I would think very

carefully as to where it might be physically located, somebody might want to

search and find one from one of this doctors patients, just for the publicity

with this case. >>