Guest guest Posted January 13, 2004 Report Share Posted January 13, 2004 Hi , It's times like this when all the book learning in the world just doesn't get it. This is a time when what is needed can only come from the heart. Reality is, life sucks sometimes. With many of us it sucks a good share of the time. Why me? What did I do? I know you are past those questions. Why you? - genetics and luck of the draw. What did you do? - nothing. What did I do to end up in such physical pain so much of the time? That's just how it has turned out. A very wise man once said that our needs, the things in life we truly need are most generally met by someone else. When something goes on and we are really down, it is most usually someone we know. They are able to help, they are able to understand and see us through because of having had a similar experience. I've had 6 miscarriages. How could that ever be a good thing? How could those experiences ever be of benefit to anyone, let alone me? Then one night late while working at a hospital I was assigned as nurse to a woman in labor. It should have been such a happy time, but she was way early and the chances of the baby being able to live outside of it's comfortable home were very slim. I sat and held her hand and we talked. Her husband was out of town. She had no family within several hundred miles and with it being so late at night, didn't want to bother her neighbors. So there the two of us sat - - , I knew exactly how she felt. There wasn't a tiny bit of what she was experiencing that I didn't know by heart. On my way home that next morning I thought to myself how very good it was to have had miscarriages. I would still rather not have experienced the loss of 6 babies. But sitting with that young woman was not the only time I have found myself thankful for the experience. How can someone say they understand, truly understand and not have walked that same path? , our path is painful. It can be extremely depressing. I find myself wondering what I'm worth. Hell, I don't even do laundry any more. I don't drive or clean house or cook. If I do much of anything at all I am in bed for days. What am I worth? , I am a complete burden to my husband, children and the rest of my family. What can I do to change that?? Nothing! But there are things that I do and try to do as best I can. One of those things I am doing right now. I'm writing a letter to someone who has come to mean a great deal to me. Someone who has said things that have helped me a lot. I can try my best to be an example of courage and faith. I can love my family even with their imperfections. What is the alternative ? You and I both know what the choices are. , I know it's hard. I know what you have written in your post is true. I know how bad you feel. But - I will not accept anything but improvement. I need you as my friend and sounding board. I suggest you start writing. Write starting from day one of memory and go from there. Write from the heart. You have a great deal to share - so many people you can help through the healing process with what you have to say. I love you and I need for you to hang in there. I hope too that you are taking your antidepressant. You may need to have it increased or add a new one. Please see your doctor ASAP. Hugs - a B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 13, 2004 Report Share Posted January 13, 2004 Hi , It's times like this when all the book learning in the world just doesn't get it. This is a time when what is needed can only come from the heart. Reality is, life sucks sometimes. With many of us it sucks a good share of the time. Why me? What did I do? I know you are past those questions. Why you? - genetics and luck of the draw. What did you do? - nothing. What did I do to end up in such physical pain so much of the time? That's just how it has turned out. A very wise man once said that our needs, the things in life we truly need are most generally met by someone else. When something goes on and we are really down, it is most usually someone we know. They are able to help, they are able to understand and see us through because of having had a similar experience. I've had 6 miscarriages. How could that ever be a good thing? How could those experiences ever be of benefit to anyone, let alone me? Then one night late while working at a hospital I was assigned as nurse to a woman in labor. It should have been such a happy time, but she was way early and the chances of the baby being able to live outside of it's comfortable home were very slim. I sat and held her hand and we talked. Her husband was out of town. She had no family within several hundred miles and with it being so late at night, didn't want to bother her neighbors. So there the two of us sat - - , I knew exactly how she felt. There wasn't a tiny bit of what she was experiencing that I didn't know by heart. On my way home that next morning I thought to myself how very good it was to have had miscarriages. I would still rather not have experienced the loss of 6 babies. But sitting with that young woman was not the only time I have found myself thankful for the experience. How can someone say they understand, truly understand and not have walked that same path? , our path is painful. It can be extremely depressing. I find myself wondering what I'm worth. Hell, I don't even do laundry any more. I don't drive or clean house or cook. If I do much of anything at all I am in bed for days. What am I worth? , I am a complete burden to my husband, children and the rest of my family. What can I do to change that?? Nothing! But there are things that I do and try to do as best I can. One of those things I am doing right now. I'm writing a letter to someone who has come to mean a great deal to me. Someone who has said things that have helped me a lot. I can try my best to be an example of courage and faith. I can love my family even with their imperfections. What is the alternative ? You and I both know what the choices are. , I know it's hard. I know what you have written in your post is true. I know how bad you feel. But - I will not accept anything but improvement. I need you as my friend and sounding board. I suggest you start writing. Write starting from day one of memory and go from there. Write from the heart. You have a great deal to share - so many people you can help through the healing process with what you have to say. I love you and I need for you to hang in there. I hope too that you are taking your antidepressant. You may need to have it increased or add a new one. Please see your doctor ASAP. Hugs - a B. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 14, 2004 Report Share Posted January 14, 2004 a B., A truly generous spirit shines through your post. Listen to her, . We will nag you to the ends of the earth to get you some help. Loving hugs, MM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 14, 2004 Report Share Posted January 14, 2004 a B., A truly generous spirit shines through your post. Listen to her, . We will nag you to the ends of the earth to get you some help. Loving hugs, MM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 14, 2004 Report Share Posted January 14, 2004 a B., A truly generous spirit shines through your post. Listen to her, . We will nag you to the ends of the earth to get you some help. Loving hugs, MM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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