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Maggie

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In reference to your feelings about thinking of the

reality of your ep and the impact on your life, I feel

that way too sometimes. We all do. I think I'm doing

fine and then suddenly it all hits me again. The

strangest things trigger it. The other day I was

exercising and suddenly I had a flashback to lying on

the surgical table while they were preparing me for

surgery. Everyone was serious and so grave and I

remember at that point becoming incredibly scared!!(My

ep surgery was on Nov 9/00) I have been thinking a lot

about that these past two weeks for some reason. I see

pg people and it hurts. I miss my baby. I had hopes

and dreams for him and all that has been denied me.

The baby clothes and furniture. Planning for pg leave.

Starting school. My arms ache for a baby sometimes so

much my heart aches. I don't have any children and I

wonder somedays if I ever will. I can't join in on

those " mommy " conversations. I can't relate to

anyone's labour stories. It bothers me and it bothers

so many others here too. Many of us are in the same

boat as you. Please realize that. Look to God for that

strength! I hope you soon find the support that you

need. I know I will be there for you Maggie!

Darci

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