hysterectomy??

January 10, 2004

Hey there

Yesterday I had my appt with the gyn, I was all ready to start my Lupron, they were even going to start it yesterday. She tells me I need to take additional calcium, and I was like "Oh, that's OK, I already take 2000 mg a day and Miacalcin". She was like "Oh, what's that for?"... "The Osteoporosis".... "we can't do Lupron when you have already been diagnosed with Osteoporosis."

She suggested "Taking it all out" I have been battling over this decision for years and each time they toss it out there, I'm like "no way, I want more kids!"

Greg was there with me, and I asked "Really, what are my chances of being able to have another kid?" And she said they could technically get me pregnant, but would it be nice? She said it would be "Hell times the hell you had with the first pregnancy, or worse. And do we recommend it? NO." I asked about my other options -- continue with the pain and problems or the hysterectomy -- so I asked about the recovery and all that and we left with all this in mind. In the meantime, she is going to check with other doctors and tell them my situation and see if maybe someone could say "OK, give the Lupron one more try." She wants me to think about the hysterectomy and have an idea by the time she calls me this week with Lupron info.

This still just does not seem right to me. I want more kids. So does Greg. We even have names picked out! I know that's really jumping too far ahead, but the reason I didn't have my tubes tied back after the first rough pregnancy was so that I could do it again. That's the reason I didn't have the hysterectomy 2 years ago when they recommended it for the endometriosis etc and did the Lupron then.

I know a lot of you have mentioned having a hysterectomy, can some of you tell me of the good/bad things, from a personal standpoint. I know I can go and Google it, but hearing it from real people is part of why we are all here.

Thanks so much!Hugs

Chell

January 10, 2004

Hi Chell, I am one of those who have written to you about this before. What a difficult thing to go through. I know from having been there. I had an ovarian disease which made the walls of my ovaries so thick that I couldn't ovulate. I had two surgeries called ovarian wedge resection. This was all in the early 70's. First baby was no problem I got pregnant on my own and had a fairly easy pregnancy. I had some spotting every month when it was time for my period, but our son was born healthy. Then the miscarriages started and the difficulty getting pregnant and the surgeries. I took fertility pills and was artificially inseminated several times. Finally in May of 1975 I gave birth to a very very frail little boy who was born almost 7 weeks early. Good doctors, a lot of love and prayer (not necessarily in that order) saw this boy through. He is now 6'3" tall and around 230lbs, married and delightfully happy.

Through the ordeal of trying to get pregnant, etc. I would get so very tired of people saying, "You should be grateful for the one you have" - and then "You should be grateful for the two you have." I wanted to scream obscenities at them. Chell, we had names picked out too and a whole lot of love to give.

My hubby and I saw three fertility specialists. (Note: I did not have Lupus at this time) To shorten the story, I ended up with my 6th miscarriage and the three doctors telling me that I needed a hysterectomy. I had started to flow heavily every month to the point of hemorrhage. Doctors kept telling me to have surgery, but I wanted another child and insisted we kept trying. Chell, it almost cost me my life. I hemorrhaged one month and had my hubby not come home for lunch, I just don't know. When the surgeon removed my uterus it tore and I hemorrhaged so bad they had to find the bleeders, etc., etc. and close me up. The doctor wasn't able to remove the vaginal side of my cervix. Great - had no uterus or ovaries, but still had to have a pap test.

Now I have had all these years to think about not having the number of children we wanted. Not too many years ago our oldest said something he thought was funny, but that I took to heart. He said, "What God didn't give you in quantity he made up with in quality." So, were we better parents because of just the two children? Or, could we have been just as good parents with 3 or 4 children? I don't know. I do know that my two sons were much better off having me alive to raise them than dead trying to have more....and that's where I was headed.

Again - each of us is different. This decision can only be made by you and your husband. Just know this - you have done your part. You didn't say right off "OK, take it all out." You are a gutsy lady. Please don't forget that, and don't ever feel like a failure or that you let someone down.

Having a hysterectomy is major surgery, so isn't fun, but it's doable. The ONLY thing I can think of that may be of real concern to you is "Do I take hormone replacement or not." Your Doctors would help you with this. Then there is the emotional part of it. No matter what anyone says, it is having part of who you are taken from you. I had the support of a wonderful husband to see me through.

I wish I could REALLY help you. I truly know exactly what you are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you. Please don't hesitate to contact me at any time.