Re: Psycho BPD stalker strikes

[Guest guest]

Wow. That sure doesn't make you want to go back to the crazy, does it?

Sorry that happened. Good for you for staying grounded!!

I agree--even hearing nada's voice would probably throw me for a while.

Sheesh. You could put this into a movie, but no one would believe it.

>

> >

> > Hey Everyone,

> >

> Maybe some of you remember me? This is Girlscout. I used to be a very active

> member, but I bet I haven't been on in at least a year. I really appreciate

> all that the list has done to help me get my BPD family under control - and

> well, basically I had to just remove them from my life.

>

> I've been LC for at least the past 7 years. I got divorced 7 years ago and

> that brought out the most hideous behavior in nada I have ever seen (well

> maybe not ever, but it was severe). So at that point, 7 years ago I pretty

> much decided to cut her out of my life. Why would I want someone in my life

> who treats me like that? I went to a few family functions and things, but I

> only spoke to Nada in a very minimal fashion. Then about 2 years ago, I

> realized that I was going to have to go NC with the whole family to survive

> it, because they wanted me to interact with Nada and essentially kept

> bringing her sickness back into my life. So I have been NC with my dad and

> all the rest (still Nada's husband) for about 2 years.

>

> Well, my grandma died last month. I felt bad about it, but I didn't respond

> to the calls and messages I got about it. I didn't even listen to them -

> don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but even hearing the voice of a

> mentally ill parent can send you into a downward spiral. I had my boyfriend

> listen to the messages and give me the overview of what they said. My dad

> was the one that called (aside from sending 5 or 6 VERY sick letters, nada

> has not tried to break my NC with her. She has not called or e-mailed

> me even once in over 7 years, wow). I still love my dad, but I just can't be

> around him because he is all tied up in the sickness web.

>

> So anyway, about a month or 6 weeks after my grandma died I get this message

> in my facebook in box:

>

> " Your quote from your website makes me sick!!

>

> What would your " public " think about you walking away from your Mother,

> father, brother and totally ignoring your Granny's funeral? Would they feel

> better to know that your main reason is due to your mother's presumed mental

> illness??

>

> You are a lothesome individual.

>

> Don't worry. I am taking care of your mother and giving her the

> unconditional love she deserved from you. "

>

> The plot thickens - I had never heard of the woman who sent me this message.

> A little digging, and I started to think she had married my brother - but of

> course, being NC for all these years, I didn't know about it or know her

> name. So a crazy woman I have never met is lashing out at me and getting all

> up in my private business.

>

> So, the night I got this I went and blocked everyone from my past from

> seeing my Facebook info. With what I do for a living, getting off facebook

> and the web is never going to work for me. I need it for my job. So then I

> thought about it all night and then the next morning I called the cops and

> reported her as a stalker.

>

> So the cops, thinking also that she had married my brother, called my

> brother. They said my brother confirmed that they were married, and he was

> apologetic. My brother then linked the cops up with this psycho biotch. The

> cops didn't say much about that conversation, but I'm thinking she lashed

> out and it didn't go well. I've also reported her to Facebook as an abuser

> and stalker.

>

> So, that's my most recent story. And it is bringing me back to you guys to

> seek support. Let me know what thoughts you have.

> Millions of hugs and wishing you the best dealing with the crazies in your

> own lives, Sorry for such a long post - ha ha, the BPD survival life can be

> very complicated and strange. . .

> Girlscout

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hey Scout,

I do remember you.You replied to many of my posts way back in the day. And like

you, I've been away from the group for a while, but have recently returned

because of some stuff I'm going through.

It's unbelieveable that your brothers wife is doing this to you. Have you even

ever met her?

She has no right to berate you.

You got the cops involved, is there a restraining order? What happened with

that?

It's funny the trouble that facebook causes. I use my page mostly for work, and

some friends. The reason I'm back to NC with my nada is because she was

" stalking " my step mom on facebook, and my step mom had made a post about me and

my husband coming to visit. So my nada doesn't want anything to do with me now

unless I stop talking to my dad and his family.

I had already blocked all past family members from my page, so since nada

couldn't find me on there, she looked for others to try and get info about me.

My step nada didn't really know better, she thought her page was set to private.

You can bet it is now.

You have made a choice not to allow this poison in your life, and you have no

reason to feel guilty about it. Especially if the person trying to make you feel

guilty sounds as mentally ill as your nada.

I've also started going back to therapy a few weeks ago. It has helped me so

much.

Welcome back, although I'm sorry for the circumstances that brought you here.

~SJJ

>

> >

> > Hey Everyone,

> >

> Maybe some of you remember me? This is Girlscout. I used to be a very active

> member, but I bet I haven't been on in at least a year. I really appreciate

> all that the list has done to help me get my BPD family under control - and

> well, basically I had to just remove them from my life.

>

> I've been LC for at least the past 7 years. I got divorced 7 years ago and

> that brought out the most hideous behavior in nada I have ever seen (well

> maybe not ever, but it was severe). So at that point, 7 years ago I pretty

> much decided to cut her out of my life. Why would I want someone in my life

> who treats me like that? I went to a few family functions and things, but I

> only spoke to Nada in a very minimal fashion. Then about 2 years ago, I

> realized that I was going to have to go NC with the whole family to survive

> it, because they wanted me to interact with Nada and essentially kept

> bringing her sickness back into my life. So I have been NC with my dad and

> all the rest (still Nada's husband) for about 2 years.

>

> Well, my grandma died last month. I felt bad about it, but I didn't respond

> to the calls and messages I got about it. I didn't even listen to them -

> don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but even hearing the voice of a

> mentally ill parent can send you into a downward spiral. I had my boyfriend

> listen to the messages and give me the overview of what they said. My dad

> was the one that called (aside from sending 5 or 6 VERY sick letters, nada

> has not tried to break my NC with her. She has not called or e-mailed

> me even once in over 7 years, wow). I still love my dad, but I just can't be

> around him because he is all tied up in the sickness web.

>

> So anyway, about a month or 6 weeks after my grandma died I get this message

> in my facebook in box:

>

> " Your quote from your website makes me sick!!

>

> What would your " public " think about you walking away from your Mother,

> father, brother and totally ignoring your Granny's funeral? Would they feel

> better to know that your main reason is due to your mother's presumed mental

> illness??

>

> You are a lothesome individual.

>

> Don't worry. I am taking care of your mother and giving her the

> unconditional love she deserved from you. "

>

> The plot thickens - I had never heard of the woman who sent me this message.

> A little digging, and I started to think she had married my brother - but of

> course, being NC for all these years, I didn't know about it or know her

> name. So a crazy woman I have never met is lashing out at me and getting all

> up in my private business.

>

> So, the night I got this I went and blocked everyone from my past from

> seeing my Facebook info. With what I do for a living, getting off facebook

> and the web is never going to work for me. I need it for my job. So then I

> thought about it all night and then the next morning I called the cops and

> reported her as a stalker.

>

> So the cops, thinking also that she had married my brother, called my

> brother. They said my brother confirmed that they were married, and he was

> apologetic. My brother then linked the cops up with this psycho biotch. The

> cops didn't say much about that conversation, but I'm thinking she lashed

> out and it didn't go well. I've also reported her to Facebook as an abuser

> and stalker.

>

> So, that's my most recent story. And it is bringing me back to you guys to

> seek support. Let me know what thoughts you have.

> Millions of hugs and wishing you the best dealing with the crazies in your

> own lives, Sorry for such a long post - ha ha, the BPD survival life can be

> very complicated and strange. . .

> Girlscout

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Girlscout! Welcome back, I definitely missed your input on this board. So sorry

about your Grandma, truly

I remember you writing about what b*stards your brothers were. I suspect your

brother went and married a BPD beotch because that was his destiny, poor sap.

If any woman is ever stupid enough to marry either one of my bada's I am 100%

certain she will be a bat sh*t crazy BPD too.

This recent drama isn't about you my dear, this woman needs an outlet for her

rage. You are an easy target because you're likely being smeared severely by

most of your NC family. You're not there to defend yourself so it's carte

blanche for the crazies to sling poo, just like monkeys do.

You did the right thing though, so props for having the courage to turn her into

the cops and FB. I hope she's embarassed, and I can guarantee she's making a

fool of herself to the police. It's possible they'll hear from others whom she's

harassed eventually.

I can relate to the invasion of privacy via FB. My NPD ex's NPD ex (tangled web

here) stalked out some pictures of me through her brother's FB and craziness

ensued from there. I was more than annoyed.

In the end it still hurts though doesn't it? Sorry you had to come back on here

with such a bogus deal Scout. Hang in there, and hugs from HF.

>

> >

> > Hey Everyone,

> >

> Maybe some of you remember me? This is Girlscout. I used to be a very active

> member, but I bet I haven't been on in at least a year. I really appreciate

> all that the list has done to help me get my BPD family under control - and

> well, basically I had to just remove them from my life.

>

> I've been LC for at least the past 7 years. I got divorced 7 years ago and

> that brought out the most hideous behavior in nada I have ever seen (well

> maybe not ever, but it was severe). So at that point, 7 years ago I pretty

> much decided to cut her out of my life. Why would I want someone in my life

> who treats me like that? I went to a few family functions and things, but I

> only spoke to Nada in a very minimal fashion. Then about 2 years ago, I

> realized that I was going to have to go NC with the whole family to survive

> it, because they wanted me to interact with Nada and essentially kept

> bringing her sickness back into my life. So I have been NC with my dad and

> all the rest (still Nada's husband) for about 2 years.

>

> Well, my grandma died last month. I felt bad about it, but I didn't respond

> to the calls and messages I got about it. I didn't even listen to them -

> don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but even hearing the voice of a

> mentally ill parent can send you into a downward spiral. I had my boyfriend

> listen to the messages and give me the overview of what they said. My dad

> was the one that called (aside from sending 5 or 6 VERY sick letters, nada

> has not tried to break my NC with her. She has not called or e-mailed

> me even once in over 7 years, wow). I still love my dad, but I just can't be

> around him because he is all tied up in the sickness web.

>

> So anyway, about a month or 6 weeks after my grandma died I get this message

> in my facebook in box:

>

> " Your quote from your website makes me sick!!

>

> What would your " public " think about you walking away from your Mother,

> father, brother and totally ignoring your Granny's funeral? Would they feel

> better to know that your main reason is due to your mother's presumed mental

> illness??

>

> You are a lothesome individual.

>

> Don't worry. I am taking care of your mother and giving her the

> unconditional love she deserved from you. "

>

> The plot thickens - I had never heard of the woman who sent me this message.

> A little digging, and I started to think she had married my brother - but of

> course, being NC for all these years, I didn't know about it or know her

> name. So a crazy woman I have never met is lashing out at me and getting all

> up in my private business.

>

> So, the night I got this I went and blocked everyone from my past from

> seeing my Facebook info. With what I do for a living, getting off facebook

> and the web is never going to work for me. I need it for my job. So then I

> thought about it all night and then the next morning I called the cops and

> reported her as a stalker.

>

> So the cops, thinking also that she had married my brother, called my

> brother. They said my brother confirmed that they were married, and he was

> apologetic. My brother then linked the cops up with this psycho biotch. The

> cops didn't say much about that conversation, but I'm thinking she lashed

> out and it didn't go well. I've also reported her to Facebook as an abuser

> and stalker.

>

> So, that's my most recent story. And it is bringing me back to you guys to

> seek support. Let me know what thoughts you have.

> Millions of hugs and wishing you the best dealing with the crazies in your

> own lives, Sorry for such a long post - ha ha, the BPD survival life can be

> very complicated and strange. . .

> Girlscout

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi Guys! Sara! Hellfire! I've missed you guys.

Yes, to answer one question, this is 100% a person I have never met. Had no

idea who she was. Had no idea he got married. Honestly, couln't care less

what he does. She sent me a crazy message about a year ago, too. That I

ignored. This message was what lead us to figure out she had married my

bada, because she had the same first name/different last name. So anyway,

this first message was creepy enough - but maybe not creepy enough to call

the cops.

" I have been dating your brother, for about two months. He does not know

that I am writing this and I am doing it for perhaps selfish reasons, in

that I would love to have a sort of " family " atmosphere here in X City (my

family is in Wisconsin and Florida). I am divorced with a ten year old son

and eleven year old daughter. I grew up with lots of extended family, a

sister and brother, with whom I am really close, etc. When he told me about

you and I read the article in X Magazine, it occurred to me that you and I

just might be very good friend material. So...there it is.

Take care,

X "

To tell you guys the truth, I had to pretty much talk the cops into getting

involved, until they actually read the note for themselves, they were pretty

much thinking I was the crazy one. In the end they did exactly what I wanted

them to do, calling her, telling her she couldn't do that, and that I would

pursue stalker charges if it continued. At least in my state, you have to

have more documentation than I have so far to get a restraining order. So

that's why I got the case number and police report on record, I'm building

my evidence in case I end up needing a restraining order.

I had my privacy settings on my Facebook locked down pretty well before this

happened. Even if I had blocked her in the beginning (which I would have),

except I didn't know how to block someone back then, ha ha, she still could

have gotten to me because she openned a second profile with a different name

when she got married.

I'll tell you one thing that has changed for me with this incident. I used

to keep my family issues to myself, very secretive about it except with

Todd. But this event makes me feel like I kind of need to " come out of the

closet " because my friends and coworkers need to know that I might be at

risk for stalking, harrassment. . . you name it. So I've slowly started

cueing my friends in.

One thing that is hard is what I do for a living - I work with news and

publicity. And in my spare time I volunteer to publicize local art events.

So basically, I'm totally easy to find. I've been the spokesperson for 5 or

6 different organizations, and my name is in the news pretty often. And the

boyfriend and I just started our own blog this year and we are putting a lot

into letting people know about it. So you can see how it's so hard, if not

impossible for me to go into hiding. . . They can just google my name and

see what I'm up to. I mean, I've spent 12 years building this career that I

totally and utterly love! Actually, it really pisses me off to even consider

going under ground and changing my life due to their bad behavior. The cop

had a lot to say about the fact that I'm accessible - I'm like dude, this is

my job. If I don't do it, I don't get paid. They have no right to mess with

my way of making a living.

Thanks for the condolences about my grandma. I did love her, but I think she

would understand that I need to be free from the craziness, and that's why I

haven't been around as much. Self preservation, right?

Well, enough about me, how have you guys been? What's new??? I'm so freaking

sick of BPD!!!!!!! I could really just scream!!!!

Hugs and hugs, Girlscout

On Fri, Jul 30, 2010 at 11:52 AM, Hellfireblonde <hellfireblonde99@...

> wrote:

>

>

> Girlscout! Welcome back, I definitely missed your input on this board. So

> sorry about your Grandma, truly

>

> I remember you writing about what b*stards your brothers were. I suspect

> your brother went and married a BPD beotch because that was his destiny,

> poor sap. If any woman is ever stupid enough to marry either one of my

> bada's I am 100% certain she will be a bat sh*t crazy BPD too.

>

> This recent drama isn't about you my dear, this woman needs an outlet for

> her rage. You are an easy target because you're likely being smeared

> severely by most of your NC family. You're not there to defend yourself so

> it's carte blanche for the crazies to sling poo, just like monkeys do.

>

> You did the right thing though, so props for having the courage to turn her

> into the cops and FB. I hope she's embarassed, and I can guarantee she's

> making a fool of herself to the police. It's possible they'll hear from

> others whom she's harassed eventually.

>

> I can relate to the invasion of privacy via FB. My NPD ex's NPD ex (tangled

> web here) stalked out some pictures of me through her brother's FB and

> craziness ensued from there. I was more than annoyed.

>

> In the end it still hurts though doesn't it? Sorry you had to come back on

> here with such a bogus deal Scout. Hang in there, and hugs from HF.

>

>

> >

> > >

> > > Hey Everyone,

> > >

> > Maybe some of you remember me? This is Girlscout. I used to be a very

> active

> > member, but I bet I haven't been on in at least a year. I really

> appreciate

> > all that the list has done to help me get my BPD family under control -

> and

> > well, basically I had to just remove them from my life.

> >

> > I've been LC for at least the past 7 years. I got divorced 7 years ago

> and

> > that brought out the most hideous behavior in nada I have ever seen (well

> > maybe not ever, but it was severe). So at that point, 7 years ago I

> pretty

> > much decided to cut her out of my life. Why would I want someone in my

> life

> > who treats me like that? I went to a few family functions and things, but

> I

> > only spoke to Nada in a very minimal fashion. Then about 2 years ago, I

> > realized that I was going to have to go NC with the whole family to

> survive

> > it, because they wanted me to interact with Nada and essentially kept

> > bringing her sickness back into my life. So I have been NC with my dad

> and

> > all the rest (still Nada's husband) for about 2 years.

> >

> > Well, my grandma died last month. I felt bad about it, but I didn't

> respond

> > to the calls and messages I got about it. I didn't even listen to them -

> > don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but even hearing the voice of

> a

> > mentally ill parent can send you into a downward spiral. I had my

> boyfriend

> > listen to the messages and give me the overview of what they said. My dad

> > was the one that called (aside from sending 5 or 6 VERY sick letters,

> nada

> > has not tried to break my NC with her. She has not called or e-mailed

> > me even once in over 7 years, wow). I still love my dad, but I just can't

> be

> > around him because he is all tied up in the sickness web.

> >

> > So anyway, about a month or 6 weeks after my grandma died I get this

> message

> > in my facebook in box:

> >

> > " Your quote from your website makes me sick!!

> >

> > What would your " public " think about you walking away from your Mother,

> > father, brother and totally ignoring your Granny's funeral? Would they

> feel

> > better to know that your main reason is due to your mother's presumed

> mental

> > illness??

> >

> > You are a lothesome individual.

> >

> > Don't worry. I am taking care of your mother and giving her the

> > unconditional love she deserved from you. "

> >

> > The plot thickens - I had never heard of the woman who sent me this

> message.

> > A little digging, and I started to think she had married my brother - but

> of

> > course, being NC for all these years, I didn't know about it or know her

> > name. So a crazy woman I have never met is lashing out at me and getting

> all

> > up in my private business.

> >

> > So, the night I got this I went and blocked everyone from my past from

> > seeing my Facebook info. With what I do for a living, getting off

> facebook

> > and the web is never going to work for me. I need it for my job. So then

> I

> > thought about it all night and then the next morning I called the cops

> and

> > reported her as a stalker.

> >

> > So the cops, thinking also that she had married my brother, called my

> > brother. They said my brother confirmed that they were married, and he

> was

> > apologetic. My brother then linked the cops up with this psycho biotch.

> The

> > cops didn't say much about that conversation, but I'm thinking she lashed

> > out and it didn't go well. I've also reported her to Facebook as an

> abuser

> > and stalker.

> >

> > So, that's my most recent story. And it is bringing me back to you guys

> to

> > seek support. Let me know what thoughts you have.

> > Millions of hugs and wishing you the best dealing with the crazies in

> your

> > own lives, Sorry for such a long post - ha ha, the BPD survival life can

> be

> > very complicated and strange. . .

> > Girlscout

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Scout,

It's a good idea to build the evidence. This might scare them off to prevent a

bigger problem. And if they don't stop harrassing you, well, you have a case.

As far as things with me, I reconnected with my dad who was out of my life for

15 years. I always thought it was because he wanted nothing to do with

me....turns out nada had a hand in keeping him away. He's not innocent by any

means, but he could have been a bigger part of my life if not for nada.

My nada found out that I have a relationship with them and all hell broke loose.

My sister is so enmeshed that I've lost her, too.

I started going back to therapy about a month ago. It has helped immensely.

Now I'm so curious as to who you are and if I've ever seen you in the news. It's

strange to think of someone under the public eye dealing with BPD craziness. You

have to put on a smile for everyone. Must be very difficult for you.

And yes, you sound so successful....there is no need to allow anyone to ruin

your career or get in the way of it. In this day and age, it is hard to find

success in a career. You have to work your ass off for it.

I'm definitely not a famous person, but I feel happy about where I am in my

career, and I am proud of my education. The last time I spoke to my nada, she

told me that she deserves all the credit for that, and that I deserve none of

it. She says that if she weren't in my life then I wouldn't be where I am today.

That is possibly true, but not in the way she thinks. I left home and went to

college because my mother was the most miserable person I knew. I wanted to make

sure I took a different path in life than she did, I didn't want to live life

like that.

I'm sick of BPD, too. But I've always been thankful to have this place to vent

and get support. Glad you came back.

~SJJ

> > >

> > > >

> > > > Hey Everyone,

> > > >

> > > Maybe some of you remember me? This is Girlscout. I used to be a very

> > active

> > > member, but I bet I haven't been on in at least a year. I really

> > appreciate

> > > all that the list has done to help me get my BPD family under control -

> > and

> > > well, basically I had to just remove them from my life.

> > >

> > > I've been LC for at least the past 7 years. I got divorced 7 years ago

> > and

> > > that brought out the most hideous behavior in nada I have ever seen (well

> > > maybe not ever, but it was severe). So at that point, 7 years ago I

> > pretty

> > > much decided to cut her out of my life. Why would I want someone in my

> > life

> > > who treats me like that? I went to a few family functions and things, but

> > I

> > > only spoke to Nada in a very minimal fashion. Then about 2 years ago, I

> > > realized that I was going to have to go NC with the whole family to

> > survive

> > > it, because they wanted me to interact with Nada and essentially kept

> > > bringing her sickness back into my life. So I have been NC with my dad

> > and

> > > all the rest (still Nada's husband) for about 2 years.

> > >

> > > Well, my grandma died last month. I felt bad about it, but I didn't

> > respond

> > > to the calls and messages I got about it. I didn't even listen to them -

> > > don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but even hearing the voice of

> > a

> > > mentally ill parent can send you into a downward spiral. I had my

> > boyfriend

> > > listen to the messages and give me the overview of what they said. My dad

> > > was the one that called (aside from sending 5 or 6 VERY sick letters,

> > nada

> > > has not tried to break my NC with her. She has not called or e-mailed

> > > me even once in over 7 years, wow). I still love my dad, but I just can't

> > be

> > > around him because he is all tied up in the sickness web.

> > >

> > > So anyway, about a month or 6 weeks after my grandma died I get this

> > message

> > > in my facebook in box:

> > >

> > > " Your quote from your website makes me sick!!

> > >

> > > What would your " public " think about you walking away from your Mother,

> > > father, brother and totally ignoring your Granny's funeral? Would they

> > feel

> > > better to know that your main reason is due to your mother's presumed

> > mental

> > > illness??

> > >

> > > You are a lothesome individual.

> > >

> > > Don't worry. I am taking care of your mother and giving her the

> > > unconditional love she deserved from you. "

> > >

> > > The plot thickens - I had never heard of the woman who sent me this

> > message.

> > > A little digging, and I started to think she had married my brother - but

> > of

> > > course, being NC for all these years, I didn't know about it or know her

> > > name. So a crazy woman I have never met is lashing out at me and getting

> > all

> > > up in my private business.

> > >

> > > So, the night I got this I went and blocked everyone from my past from

> > > seeing my Facebook info. With what I do for a living, getting off

> > facebook

> > > and the web is never going to work for me. I need it for my job. So then

> > I

> > > thought about it all night and then the next morning I called the cops

> > and

> > > reported her as a stalker.

> > >

> > > So the cops, thinking also that she had married my brother, called my

> > > brother. They said my brother confirmed that they were married, and he

> > was

> > > apologetic. My brother then linked the cops up with this psycho biotch.

> > The

> > > cops didn't say much about that conversation, but I'm thinking she lashed

> > > out and it didn't go well. I've also reported her to Facebook as an

> > abuser

> > > and stalker.

> > >

> > > So, that's my most recent story. And it is bringing me back to you guys

> > to

> > > seek support. Let me know what thoughts you have.

> > > Millions of hugs and wishing you the best dealing with the crazies in

> > your

> > > own lives, Sorry for such a long post - ha ha, the BPD survival life can

> > be

> > > very complicated and strange. . .

> > > Girlscout

> > >

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

Scout,

It's a good idea to build the evidence. This might scare them off to prevent a

bigger problem. And if they don't stop harrassing you, well, you have a case.

As far as things with me, I reconnected with my dad who was out of my life for

15 years. I always thought it was because he wanted nothing to do with

me....turns out nada had a hand in keeping him away. He's not innocent by any

means, but he could have been a bigger part of my life if not for nada.

My nada found out that I have a relationship with them and all hell broke loose.

My sister is so enmeshed that I've lost her, too.

I started going back to therapy about a month ago. It has helped immensely.

Now I'm so curious as to who you are and if I've ever seen you in the news. It's

strange to think of someone under the public eye dealing with BPD craziness. You

have to put on a smile for everyone. Must be very difficult for you.

And yes, you sound so successful....there is no need to allow anyone to ruin

your career or get in the way of it. In this day and age, it is hard to find

success in a career. You have to work your ass off for it.

I'm definitely not a famous person, but I feel happy about where I am in my

career, and I am proud of my education. The last time I spoke to my nada, she

told me that she deserves all the credit for that, and that I deserve none of

it. She says that if she weren't in my life then I wouldn't be where I am today.

That is possibly true, but not in the way she thinks. I left home and went to

college because my mother was the most miserable person I knew. I wanted to make

sure I took a different path in life than she did, I didn't want to live life

like that.

I'm sick of BPD, too. But I've always been thankful to have this place to vent

and get support. Glad you came back.

~SJJ

> > >

> > > >

> > > > Hey Everyone,

> > > >

> > > Maybe some of you remember me? This is Girlscout. I used to be a very

> > active

> > > member, but I bet I haven't been on in at least a year. I really

> > appreciate

> > > all that the list has done to help me get my BPD family under control -

> > and

> > > well, basically I had to just remove them from my life.

> > >

> > > I've been LC for at least the past 7 years. I got divorced 7 years ago

> > and

> > > that brought out the most hideous behavior in nada I have ever seen (well

> > > maybe not ever, but it was severe). So at that point, 7 years ago I

> > pretty

> > > much decided to cut her out of my life. Why would I want someone in my

> > life

> > > who treats me like that? I went to a few family functions and things, but

> > I

> > > only spoke to Nada in a very minimal fashion. Then about 2 years ago, I

> > > realized that I was going to have to go NC with the whole family to

> > survive

> > > it, because they wanted me to interact with Nada and essentially kept

> > > bringing her sickness back into my life. So I have been NC with my dad

> > and

> > > all the rest (still Nada's husband) for about 2 years.

> > >

> > > Well, my grandma died last month. I felt bad about it, but I didn't

> > respond

> > > to the calls and messages I got about it. I didn't even listen to them -

> > > don't know if anyone else has noticed this, but even hearing the voice of

> > a

> > > mentally ill parent can send you into a downward spiral. I had my

> > boyfriend

> > > listen to the messages and give me the overview of what they said. My dad

> > > was the one that called (aside from sending 5 or 6 VERY sick letters,

> > nada

> > > has not tried to break my NC with her. She has not called or e-mailed

> > > me even once in over 7 years, wow). I still love my dad, but I just can't

> > be

> > > around him because he is all tied up in the sickness web.

> > >

> > > So anyway, about a month or 6 weeks after my grandma died I get this

> > message

> > > in my facebook in box:

> > >

> > > " Your quote from your website makes me sick!!

> > >

> > > What would your " public " think about you walking away from your Mother,

> > > father, brother and totally ignoring your Granny's funeral? Would they

> > feel

> > > better to know that your main reason is due to your mother's presumed

> > mental

> > > illness??

> > >

> > > You are a lothesome individual.

> > >

> > > Don't worry. I am taking care of your mother and giving her the

> > > unconditional love she deserved from you. "

> > >

> > > The plot thickens - I had never heard of the woman who sent me this

> > message.

> > > A little digging, and I started to think she had married my brother - but

> > of

> > > course, being NC for all these years, I didn't know about it or know her

> > > name. So a crazy woman I have never met is lashing out at me and getting

> > all

> > > up in my private business.

> > >

> > > So, the night I got this I went and blocked everyone from my past from

> > > seeing my Facebook info. With what I do for a living, getting off

> > facebook

> > > and the web is never going to work for me. I need it for my job. So then

> > I

> > > thought about it all night and then the next morning I called the cops

> > and

> > > reported her as a stalker.

> > >

> > > So the cops, thinking also that she had married my brother, called my

> > > brother. They said my brother confirmed that they were married, and he

> > was

> > > apologetic. My brother then linked the cops up with this psycho biotch.

> > The

> > > cops didn't say much about that conversation, but I'm thinking she lashed

> > > out and it didn't go well. I've also reported her to Facebook as an

> > abuser

> > > and stalker.

> > >

> > > So, that's my most recent story. And it is bringing me back to you guys

> > to

> > > seek support. Let me know what thoughts you have.

> > > Millions of hugs and wishing you the best dealing with the crazies in

> > your

> > > own lives, Sorry for such a long post - ha ha, the BPD survival life can

> > be

> > > very complicated and strange. . .

> > > Girlscout

> > >

> > >

> > >

[Guest guest]

Writemanque,

I HATE when that happens. One of my most recent NADA attacks happened when I was

at work. She kept blowing up my phone with texts, just really damaging stuff. I

had to go into a meeting with a happy face even though my guts were just twisted

inside from reading those damned texts.

I hate when they decide to attack you at work. I just screw up the rest of the

day. It's gotta be worse for you...diagnosing patients and all. I just can't

think clearly after a nada attack.

But of course, it fits because they don't think there could be ANYTHING more

important than they are in our lives....who cares about our careers? NADA needs

to come first, right?

Nuts.

You just can't fix crazy.

~SJJ

> > > >

> > > > Hi Guys! Sara! Hellfire! I've missed you guys.

> > > >

> > > > Yes, to answer one question, this is 100% a person I have never met. Had

> > > no

> > > > idea who she was. Had no idea he got married. Honestly, couln't care

less

> > > > what he does. She sent me a crazy message about a year ago, too. That I

> > > > ignored. This message was what lead us to figure out she had married my

> > > > bada, because she had the same first name/different last name. So

anyway,

> > > > this first message was creepy enough - but maybe not creepy enough to

> > > call

> > > > the cops.

> > > >

> > > > " I have been dating your brother, for about two months. He does not know

> > > > that I am writing this and I am doing it for perhaps selfish reasons, in

> > > > that I would love to have a sort of " family " atmosphere here in X City

> > > (my

> > > > family is in Wisconsin and Florida). I am divorced with a ten year old

> > > son

> > > > and eleven year old daughter. I grew up with lots of extended family, a

> > > > sister and brother, with whom I am really close, etc. When he told me

> > > about

> > > > you and I read the article in X Magazine, it occurred to me that you and

> > > I

> > > > just might be very good friend material. So...there it is.

> > > > Take care,

> > > > X "

> > > >

> > > > To tell you guys the truth, I had to pretty much talk the cops into

> > > getting

> > > > involved, until they actually read the note for themselves, they were

> > > pretty

> > > > much thinking I was the crazy one. In the end they did exactly what I

> > > wanted

> > > > them to do, calling her, telling her she couldn't do that, and that I

> > > would

> > > > pursue stalker charges if it continued. At least in my state, you have

to

> > > > have more documentation than I have so far to get a restraining order.

So

> > > > that's why I got the case number and police report on record, I'm

> > > building

> > > > my evidence in case I end up needing a restraining order.

> > > >

> > > > I had my privacy settings on my Facebook locked down pretty well before

> > > this

> > > > happened. Even if I had blocked her in the beginning (which I would

> > > have),

> > > > except I didn't know how to block someone back then, ha ha, she still

> > > could

> > > > have gotten to me because she openned a second profile with a different

> > > name

> > > > when she got married.

> > > >

> > > > I'll tell you one thing that has changed for me with this incident. I

> > > used

> > > > to keep my family issues to myself, very secretive about it except with

> > > > Todd. But this event makes me feel like I kind of need to " come out of

> > > the

> > > > closet " because my friends and coworkers need to know that I might be at

> > > > risk for stalking, harrassment. . . you name it. So I've slowly started

> > > > cueing my friends in.

> > > >

> > > > One thing that is hard is what I do for a living - I work with news and

> > > > publicity. And in my spare time I volunteer to publicize local art

> > > events.

> > > > So basically, I'm totally easy to find. I've been the spokesperson for 5

> > > or

> > > > 6 different organizations, and my name is in the news pretty often. And

> > > the

> > > > boyfriend and I just started our own blog this year and we are putting a

> > > lot

> > > > into letting people know about it. So you can see how it's so hard, if

> > > not

> > > > impossible for me to go into hiding. . . They can just google my name

and

> > > > see what I'm up to. I mean, I've spent 12 years building this career

that

> > > I

> > > > totally and utterly love! Actually, it really pisses me off to even

> > > consider

> > > > going under ground and changing my life due to their bad behavior. The

> > > cop

> > > > had a lot to say about the fact that I'm accessible - I'm like dude,

this

> > > is

> > > > my job. If I don't do it, I don't get paid. They have no right to mess

> > > with

> > > > my way of making a living.

> > > >

> > > > Thanks for the condolences about my grandma. I did love her, but I think

> > > she

> > > > would understand that I need to be free from the craziness, and that's

> > > why I

> > > > haven't been around as much. Self preservation, right?

> > > >

> > > > Well, enough about me, how have you guys been? What's new??? I'm so

> > > freaking

> > > > sick of BPD!!!!!!! I could really just scream!!!!

> > > > Hugs and hugs, Girlscout

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

>

> Lots of writing for me, too, though not of the sort I'd *really* like to do

(hence my handle), plus I'm a physician so I have to be generally accessible

more often than not. My nada paged me at work once--I didn't recognize the

number so I had to answer. So that was fun: getting sprung by nada after

almost three years NC, having all sorts of triggers set off, and then going to

see patients. Good times.

My sympathies.

[Guest guest]

>

> Lots of writing for me, too, though not of the sort I'd *really* like to do

(hence my handle), plus I'm a physician so I have to be generally accessible

more often than not. My nada paged me at work once--I didn't recognize the

number so I had to answer. So that was fun: getting sprung by nada after

almost three years NC, having all sorts of triggers set off, and then going to

see patients. Good times.

My sympathies.

[Guest guest]

>

> Lots of writing for me, too, though not of the sort I'd *really* like to do

(hence my handle), plus I'm a physician so I have to be generally accessible

more often than not. My nada paged me at work once--I didn't recognize the

number so I had to answer. So that was fun: getting sprung by nada after

almost three years NC, having all sorts of triggers set off, and then going to

see patients. Good times.

My sympathies.

[Guest guest]

Oh lord, my job's that way too. I have to answer the phone no matter the

number. They haven't gotten me yet thought. What did you do? I'd probably

just hang up after saying something polite, like " good luck to you. "

On Sat, Jul 31, 2010 at 3:02 PM, writermanque wrote:

>

>

> Lots of writing for me, too, though not of the sort I'd *really* like to do

> (hence my handle), plus I'm a physician so I have to be generally accessible

> more often than not. My nada paged me at work once--I didn't recognize the

> number so I had to answer. So that was fun: getting sprung by nada after

> almost three years NC, having all sorts of triggers set off, and then going

> to see patients. Good times.

>

>

>

> > > >

> > > > Hi Guys! Sara! Hellfire! I've missed you guys.

> > > >

> > > > Yes, to answer one question, this is 100% a person I have never met.

> Had

> > > no

> > > > idea who she was. Had no idea he got married. Honestly, couln't care

> less

> > > > what he does. She sent me a crazy message about a year ago, too. That

> I

> > > > ignored. This message was what lead us to figure out she had married

> my

> > > > bada, because she had the same first name/different last name. So

> anyway,

> > > > this first message was creepy enough - but maybe not creepy enough to

> > > call

> > > > the cops.

> > > >

> > > > " I have been dating your brother, for about two months. He does not

> know

> > > > that I am writing this and I am doing it for perhaps selfish reasons,

> in

> > > > that I would love to have a sort of " family " atmosphere here in X

> City

> > > (my

> > > > family is in Wisconsin and Florida). I am divorced with a ten year

> old

> > > son

> > > > and eleven year old daughter. I grew up with lots of extended family,

> a

> > > > sister and brother, with whom I am really close, etc. When he told me

> > > about

> > > > you and I read the article in X Magazine, it occurred to me that you

> and

> > > I

> > > > just might be very good friend material. So...there it is.

> > > > Take care,

> > > > X "

> > > >

> > > > To tell you guys the truth, I had to pretty much talk the cops into

> > > getting

> > > > involved, until they actually read the note for themselves, they were

> > > pretty

> > > > much thinking I was the crazy one. In the end they did exactly what I

> > > wanted

> > > > them to do, calling her, telling her she couldn't do that, and that I

> > > would

> > > > pursue stalker charges if it continued. At least in my state, you

> have to

> > > > have more documentation than I have so far to get a restraining

> order. So

> > > > that's why I got the case number and police report on record, I'm

> > > building

> > > > my evidence in case I end up needing a restraining order.

> > > >

> > > > I had my privacy settings on my Facebook locked down pretty well

> before

> > > this

> > > > happened. Even if I had blocked her in the beginning (which I would

> > > have),

> > > > except I didn't know how to block someone back then, ha ha, she still

> > > could

> > > > have gotten to me because she openned a second profile with a

> different

> > > name

> > > > when she got married.

> > > >

> > > > I'll tell you one thing that has changed for me with this incident. I

> > > used

> > > > to keep my family issues to myself, very secretive about it except

> with

> > > > Todd. But this event makes me feel like I kind of need to " come out

> of

> > > the

> > > > closet " because my friends and coworkers need to know that I might be

> at

> > > > risk for stalking, harrassment. . . you name it. So I've slowly

> started

> > > > cueing my friends in.

> > > >

> > > > One thing that is hard is what I do for a living - I work with news

> and

> > > > publicity. And in my spare time I volunteer to publicize local art

> > > events.

> > > > So basically, I'm totally easy to find. I've been the spokesperson

> for 5

> > > or

> > > > 6 different organizations, and my name is in the news pretty often.

> And

> > > the

> > > > boyfriend and I just started our own blog this year and we are

> putting a

> > > lot

> > > > into letting people know about it. So you can see how it's so hard,

> if

> > > not

> > > > impossible for me to go into hiding. . . They can just google my name

> and

> > > > see what I'm up to. I mean, I've spent 12 years building this career

> that

> > > I

> > > > totally and utterly love! Actually, it really pisses me off to even

> > > consider

> > > > going under ground and changing my life due to their bad behavior.

> The

> > > cop

> > > > had a lot to say about the fact that I'm accessible - I'm like dude,

> this

> > > is

> > > > my job. If I don't do it, I don't get paid. They have no right to

> mess

> > > with

> > > > my way of making a living.

> > > >

> > > > Thanks for the condolences about my grandma. I did love her, but I

> think

> > > she

> > > > would understand that I need to be free from the craziness, and

> that's

> > > why I

> > > > haven't been around as much. Self preservation, right?

> > > >

> > > > Well, enough about me, how have you guys been? What's new??? I'm so

> > > freaking

> > > > sick of BPD!!!!!!! I could really just scream!!!!

> > > > Hugs and hugs, Girlscout

> > > >

> > >

> > >

> > >

> >

> >

> >

[Guest guest]

Once I realized it was her, I said, " I'm only going to say this once. You need

professional help. "

She: " I have been seeing a professional. And my professional says the problem

is your husband. "

Me: " Your professional has never met my husband. "

She (chuckling slightly): " Writer, you are an abused woman... "

Me (cutting her off): " You're right! Thanks! " And I hung up.

I probably engaged a bit more than I should have, but I was really peeved. I

can't imagine what she's been telling everyone within earshot about my husband,

but then again, you can't worry about what crazy people say.

>

[Guest guest]

Once I realized it was her, I said, " I'm only going to say this once. You need

professional help. "

She: " I have been seeing a professional. And my professional says the problem

is your husband. "

Me: " Your professional has never met my husband. "

She (chuckling slightly): " Writer, you are an abused woman... "

Me (cutting her off): " You're right! Thanks! " And I hung up.

I probably engaged a bit more than I should have, but I was really peeved. I

can't imagine what she's been telling everyone within earshot about my husband,

but then again, you can't worry about what crazy people say.

>