Re: Ethical Problems with 12 Step?

May 16, 2001

One of the most extreme must surely be Sex Addicts Anonymous, which has become a remarkable celibacy cult.

A fellow in my LifeRing group recently posted on our message board that he has been working SAA, and that he has been told he may not masturbate, not even occasionally. Several of us gently queried him about the feasibility of such an approach, since he was absolutely prohibited from having sex with a person. He sounded truly self-loathing and miserable.

--Mona--

May 16, 2001

> I guess the point of this group is that there would

> not be one unified answer to my question, but is " ____

> Anonymous " unethical because of being a religion (do

> you think all religion is unethical?) or is it

> unethical because it claims not to be a religion but

> is? (the concern here would be with honesty).

>

> I'm a religious person looking at 12 step for a

> problem other than Alcohol and question the

> applicability of the Big Book.

Hi Tricia

I think probably the only thing that most ppl on this forum would

definitely agree with is that *forcing* ppl to go to _A is unethical.

IF ppl want to go there by choice, that's up to them. As far as the

US Constitution is concerned (and also UN Human Rights) the

objection is that _A is religious, irrespective of what it claims to

be, because it is against a person's freedom of conscience to compel

them to take part in any religious activity.

As to the ethicality of voluntary _A, then I doubt many folks abject

to ppl taking part in religious groups if they want to. While _A

routinely denies it is religious, and hence this might be some grounds

for concern, the reality is that many religious ppl do the same thing:

I was astonished to hear ppl say " I'm Xtian but I'm not religious " but

that seems to be very common these days.

If you consider yourself to be religious, then you might still have a

problem with _A, since some ppl believe _A incompatible with their

religion. Only you can decide this, but dont bother asking any _A's

about it - they will always say _A is compatible with any religion and

even with atheism.

Obviously many folks who arent religious are likely to have a problem

with a religious program, but there are objections to _A that go way

beyond this - whole areas of it may be serious grounds for concern for

a number of reasons. This is where there are many areas of opinion

found here, from folks who think that attending any kind of Recovery

Group is a mistake to those who think that there may be positive

aspects to attending _A, like social support, that may outweigh the

downside in some cases.

Even with regard to alcohol problems, there is much in the BB to be

objected to, not least its antediluvian sexual politics that has a

chapter called " To Wives " written by Bill pretending to be his

wife, to long suffering Lois's understandable outrage. When its

philosophy gets applied to other areas, then considerable problems may

ensue, particularly concerning those problem behaviors where total

abstinence isnt appropriate, such as food disorders, and sex and

relationships - all of which needs to be taken into consideration.

Unless the _A you have in mind is very new they almost certainly have

their own BB that will put a particular twist on the original, and

here they may become particularly off the wall. One of the most

extreme must surely be Sex Addicts Anonymous, which has become a

remarkable celibacy cult.

P.

May 16, 2001