Marla

[Guest guest]

Marla,

First I am sorry that I haven't welcomed you to our group sooner and

for all of the pain that you have suffered. Thanks for your advice.

I agree with the 3 strikes and you are out. I am happy to say that

most of the people around me are supportive and understanding. I wish

you the best and I'm sorry about the pain that you are in.

Roxie

[Guest guest]

Thanks Roxie! I'm glad to be here. I'm learning so much.

Well, I should not have really said they are out. It's me that goes 'out'

after three times trying to honestly answer questions that a person

really doesn't want answers for. I have to conserve my energy for more

productive encounters - like healing <duh>. If I have made the

effort to kindly answer insensitive questions from the same person

several times and they are still callous and uncaring, I have to turn a

deaf ear to their comments and questions, stop taking it personally

and realize there are some people who simply don't listen to what

comes out of their own mouth and even less to the responses they have

gotten to their own questions. When they no longer get the expected

response (a look on my face like I've been blind-sided or a <gasp>

that tells them they've shocked me) and slowly realize that I'm not

responding to them anymore they eventually stop their behavior. They may

not know that I am 'out' but my blank look and glazing over eyes gives

them a hint.

Most of the people around me are also helpful and supportive. It's the

ones who have never understood (nor even tried) and those I only

occasionally run into at the store who were able to hurt and run. Notice

I said 'were able'. I had to learn that not everyone I knew was willing

or able to be understanding. I have a limited amount of energy now so I

just stopped expecting them to change and wrought the change within

myself. And you should know that I still love them all.

Just between me and you (and the 200+ members <g>) I think I might

have had to slap somebody if I had been with you. Yes, I'm sure I could

have rousted up enough energy to do that. I'm not called

" OrneryOne " for nothing.

Marla

PS - Before anyone decides to let me know that my email is not oRnery but

onery yes, yes I know. My ISP made the mistake but I decided I liked it

because it could also be construed as OneWryOne. In case you haven't

noticed, I like lots of names!

At 2/16/03 Sunday 12:48 PM +0000, you wrote:

Marla,

First I am sorry that I haven't welcomed you to our group sooner

and

for all of the pain that you have suffered. Thanks for your

advice.

I agree with the 3 strikes and you are out. I am happy to say that

most of the people around me are supportive and understanding. I

wish

you the best and I'm sorry about the pain that you are in.

Roxie