Re: Okay, I knew families could be nasty...

January 6, 2006

That's sad that they don't realize your motivation for telling them about the gene and are being so defensive.

You might want to tell them that undiagnosed and untreated Celiac (with or without symptoms) can lead to complications including cancer. And that you only were telling them about the gene because you are concerned for all family members who might have celiac or who's children might have it and that it's recommended to let other family members know because it is a hereditary disease. Not a blame game but wanting to help those you care about. If they are online, invite them to join this group and read what others are going through or send them links to celiac information sites.

Has your husband talked to them about this, maybe coming from him (if he has a good relationship with his family) it will be more accepted? I hope they take some time to learn more about celiac disease rather than let it become a wedge between all of you.

Good Luck!!

:-)

Okay, I knew families could be nasty...

We found out that our ds2 got the gene from his daddy. I'm in shockb/c I thought for sure it would be me.I did the responsible thing and notified my SIL and MIL that my dh wasthe gene carrier. I did this while still in a state of shock. Theintent was to let them know they were at risk.SIL got defensive, accused me of looking to lay blame and didn't seewhat the big deal was -- "We are all adults and if by some dumb luckwe have this gene or disease I think we have been handling our livespretty well. We should already know what may cause us gas, to puke,have diarrhea or some other symptom that is unpleasant. But I don'tneed to know where it came from unless it is cancer, heart disease,lukemia, kidney disease, or some other disease that might require ablood transfusion or transplant." She also felt I was intorrogatingher mother by asking my MIL to find out if she was tested for CD whenshe was so sick in the ER with bloody stool we thought she was goingto die.I got little sleep last night. I am still ill to my stomach. I wasfore warned that family might not take it well, but I never expectedthis kind of reaction from dh's family. My father was willing to goget tested, but now unfortunately he does not have a reason. And Ithink my father might have CD, even though he didn't pass the gene to me.I wrote SIL a very long reply with more detail than her little braincould possibly ever comprehend. She was so nasty toward me, Icouldn't help myself but reply. The most unnerving thing was her lackof understanding that it took us 3 1/2 yrs to get a diagnosis, not 31/2 yrs to know something was wrong with him - the ignorance. And shewent on to tell me I needed to learn about it and teach him!!! Likeshe is all authoritative and I've sat here looking to lay blameinstead of learning about CD... I don't know why I even bothered -- oh, yeah, I didn't want them tosuffer from undiagnosed CD and get cancer and die.RejoyceWinchester, VA

January 6, 2006

That's sad that they don't realize your motivation for telling them about the gene and are being so defensive.

You might want to tell them that undiagnosed and untreated Celiac (with or without symptoms) can lead to complications including cancer. And that you only were telling them about the gene because you are concerned for all family members who might have celiac or who's children might have it and that it's recommended to let other family members know because it is a hereditary disease. Not a blame game but wanting to help those you care about. If they are online, invite them to join this group and read what others are going through or send them links to celiac information sites.

Has your husband talked to them about this, maybe coming from him (if he has a good relationship with his family) it will be more accepted? I hope they take some time to learn more about celiac disease rather than let it become a wedge between all of you.

Good Luck!!

:-)

Okay, I knew families could be nasty...

We found out that our ds2 got the gene from his daddy. I'm in shockb/c I thought for sure it would be me.I did the responsible thing and notified my SIL and MIL that my dh wasthe gene carrier. I did this while still in a state of shock. Theintent was to let them know they were at risk.SIL got defensive, accused me of looking to lay blame and didn't seewhat the big deal was -- "We are all adults and if by some dumb luckwe have this gene or disease I think we have been handling our livespretty well. We should already know what may cause us gas, to puke,have diarrhea or some other symptom that is unpleasant. But I don'tneed to know where it came from unless it is cancer, heart disease,lukemia, kidney disease, or some other disease that might require ablood transfusion or transplant." She also felt I was intorrogatingher mother by asking my MIL to find out if she was tested for CD whenshe was so sick in the ER with bloody stool we thought she was goingto die.I got little sleep last night. I am still ill to my stomach. I wasfore warned that family might not take it well, but I never expectedthis kind of reaction from dh's family. My father was willing to goget tested, but now unfortunately he does not have a reason. And Ithink my father might have CD, even though he didn't pass the gene to me.I wrote SIL a very long reply with more detail than her little braincould possibly ever comprehend. She was so nasty toward me, Icouldn't help myself but reply. The most unnerving thing was her lackof understanding that it took us 3 1/2 yrs to get a diagnosis, not 31/2 yrs to know something was wrong with him - the ignorance. And shewent on to tell me I needed to learn about it and teach him!!! Likeshe is all authoritative and I've sat here looking to lay blameinstead of learning about CD... I don't know why I even bothered -- oh, yeah, I didn't want them tosuffer from undiagnosed CD and get cancer and die.RejoyceWinchester, VA

January 6, 2006

That's sad that they don't realize your motivation for telling them about the gene and are being so defensive.

You might want to tell them that undiagnosed and untreated Celiac (with or without symptoms) can lead to complications including cancer. And that you only were telling them about the gene because you are concerned for all family members who might have celiac or who's children might have it and that it's recommended to let other family members know because it is a hereditary disease. Not a blame game but wanting to help those you care about. If they are online, invite them to join this group and read what others are going through or send them links to celiac information sites.

Has your husband talked to them about this, maybe coming from him (if he has a good relationship with his family) it will be more accepted? I hope they take some time to learn more about celiac disease rather than let it become a wedge between all of you.

Good Luck!!

:-)

Okay, I knew families could be nasty...

We found out that our ds2 got the gene from his daddy. I'm in shockb/c I thought for sure it would be me.I did the responsible thing and notified my SIL and MIL that my dh wasthe gene carrier. I did this while still in a state of shock. Theintent was to let them know they were at risk.SIL got defensive, accused me of looking to lay blame and didn't seewhat the big deal was -- "We are all adults and if by some dumb luckwe have this gene or disease I think we have been handling our livespretty well. We should already know what may cause us gas, to puke,have diarrhea or some other symptom that is unpleasant. But I don'tneed to know where it came from unless it is cancer, heart disease,lukemia, kidney disease, or some other disease that might require ablood transfusion or transplant." She also felt I was intorrogatingher mother by asking my MIL to find out if she was tested for CD whenshe was so sick in the ER with bloody stool we thought she was goingto die.I got little sleep last night. I am still ill to my stomach. I wasfore warned that family might not take it well, but I never expectedthis kind of reaction from dh's family. My father was willing to goget tested, but now unfortunately he does not have a reason. And Ithink my father might have CD, even though he didn't pass the gene to me.I wrote SIL a very long reply with more detail than her little braincould possibly ever comprehend. She was so nasty toward me, Icouldn't help myself but reply. The most unnerving thing was her lackof understanding that it took us 3 1/2 yrs to get a diagnosis, not 31/2 yrs to know something was wrong with him - the ignorance. And shewent on to tell me I needed to learn about it and teach him!!! Likeshe is all authoritative and I've sat here looking to lay blameinstead of learning about CD... I don't know why I even bothered -- oh, yeah, I didn't want them tosuffer from undiagnosed CD and get cancer and die.RejoyceWinchester, VA

January 6, 2006

If she can't process info in her pea brain, I'd just zap this part to her:

--Trudy San , CA "People who believe in absurdities will eventually commit atrocities." ~Voltaire

-------------- Original message --------------

I don't know why I even bothered -- oh, yeah, I didn't want them tosuffer from undiagnosed CD and get cancer and die.RejoyceWinchester, VA

January 6, 2006

ds2- 2 year old dear son

dh- dear husband

Do wrote:

This is really so sad.You did your

duty and made sure they knew they were at risk.I bet these people bring

gluten into your home in the future! Mark my Gf words.

Now your job is to care for your

child. It is going to take all your effort and you can't waste your

needed energy on crazy people.It's a gene for goodness sake. You're not

saying they beat your child!! Some people.

BTW- can someone explain ds2,and dh

to me?

Doreen

-----

Original Message -----

From:

Rejoyce

Hanson

To:

SillyYaks

Sent:

Friday, January 06, 2006 9:48 AM

Subject:

Okay, I knew families could be nasty...

We found out that our ds2 got the gene from his daddy. I'm in

shock

b/c I thought for sure it would be me.

I did the responsible thing and notified my SIL and MIL that my dh was

the gene carrier. I did this while still in a state of shock. The

intent was to let them know they were at risk.

SIL got defensive, accused me of looking to lay blame and didn't see

what the big deal was -- "We are all adults and if by some dumb luck

we have this gene or disease I think we have been handling our lives

pretty well. We should already know what may cause us gas, to puke,

have diarrhea or some other symptom that is unpleasant. But I don't

need to know where it came from unless it is cancer, heart disease,

lukemia, kidney disease, or some other disease that might require a

blood transfusion or transplant." She also felt I was intorrogating

her mother by asking my MIL to find out if she was tested for CD when

she was so sick in the ER with bloody stool we thought she was going

to die.

I got little sleep last night. I am still ill to my stomach. I was

fore warned that family might not take it well, but I never expected

this kind of reaction from dh's family. My father was willing to go

get tested, but now unfortunately he does not have a reason. And I

think my father might have CD, even though he didn't pass the gene to

me.

I wrote SIL a very long reply with more detail than her little brain

could possibly ever comprehend. She was so nasty toward me, I

couldn't help myself but reply. The most unnerving thing was her lack

of understanding that it took us 3 1/2 yrs to get a diagnosis, not 3

1/2 yrs to know something was wrong with him - the ignorance. And she

went on to tell me I needed to learn about it and teach him!!! Like

she is all authoritative and I've sat here looking to lay blame

instead of learning about CD...

I don't know why I even bothered -- oh, yeah, I didn't want them to

suffer from undiagnosed CD and get cancer and die.

Rejoyce

Winchester, VA

January 6, 2006