Guest guest Posted February 26, 2001 Report Share Posted February 26, 2001 I am not " sharing " what went on in the rooms, I am TELLING or wittnessing what happens. I am taking the leep to do this. So much of this garbage had become so much a part of who I was that I didn't even realize that what had happened was WRONG! I had long ago forgotten about that cold night until I discussed it with a friend recently. She was shocked and I was shocked by her even being shocked. I realized that all this time, I had internalized stuff like this as being okay. This is why I came. I want to KNOW what is right and what is wrong. If I am in the wrong place to do this, just tell me the right place to go. I don't want to waste anymore of my life. CAG Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2001 Report Share Posted February 27, 2001 At 04:56 AM 2/27/01 -0000, ggoble@... wrote: >I had long ago forgotten about that cold night until I discussed it >with a friend recently. She was shocked and I was shocked by her >even being shocked. I realized that all this time, I had >internalized stuff like this as being okay. > >This is why I came. I want to KNOW what is right and what is wrong. > >If I am in the wrong place to do this, just tell me the right place >to go. I strongly believe this IS the right place, and the main purpose of this list: essentially to have a place to recover FROM 12-step involvement. Thanks for coming forward with your story. >I don't want to waste anymore of my life. > >CAG ----- This post (except quoted portions) Copyright 2001, Ben Bradley. http://listen.to/benbradley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2001 Report Share Posted February 27, 2001 At 04:56 AM 2/27/01 -0000, ggoble@... wrote: >I had long ago forgotten about that cold night until I discussed it >with a friend recently. She was shocked and I was shocked by her >even being shocked. I realized that all this time, I had >internalized stuff like this as being okay. > >This is why I came. I want to KNOW what is right and what is wrong. > >If I am in the wrong place to do this, just tell me the right place >to go. I strongly believe this IS the right place, and the main purpose of this list: essentially to have a place to recover FROM 12-step involvement. Thanks for coming forward with your story. >I don't want to waste anymore of my life. > >CAG ----- This post (except quoted portions) Copyright 2001, Ben Bradley. http://listen.to/benbradley Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2001 Report Share Posted February 27, 2001 ggoble@... wrote: > I am not " sharing " what went on in the rooms, I am TELLING or > wittnessing what happens. I am taking the leep to do this. > > So much of this garbage had become so much a part of who I was that I > didn't even realize that what had happened was WRONG! > > I had long ago forgotten about that cold night until I discussed it > with a friend recently. She was shocked and I was shocked by her > even being shocked. I realized that all this time, I had > internalized stuff like this as being okay. > > This is why I came. I want to KNOW what is right and what is wrong. > > If I am in the wrong place to do this, just tell me the right place > to go. I don't want to waste anymore of my life. I do not think you are in the wrong place at all. While it can get rather rough and tumble here at times, I think most of the people here will respect your desire to be treated with respect. If, by some chance, someone should respond to your post in an unwarranted way please keep in mind that these are just words on a screen. In the past someone on the list attacked me by attributing the words of someone else to me. While this is not pleasant, a simple press of the delete key solves the problem. This is not a perfect place, people here are not perfect, and no guaranty can be made regarding everyone behaving with dignity. On the other hand, I have found most people here to be kind and thoughtful, I think you will find much useful support here. I will also mention that one of the characteristics of the 12 step paradigm is the " hierarchy of abuse " . Anyone staying in the " rooms " for anytime must find their place in this hierarchy. While you became the target of abuse, others took up positions as abusers. That you chose not to move up the ladder to become an abuser speaks volumes for your " sense of right and wrong " . Unfortunately, the only roll left to you in the twisted world of the 12 step faith healing movement is one of " target for the abusers " . I believe you will do very well on your journey to rediscover your " knowledge " of right and wrong. Your courage in the face of great injustice is inspiring. Your " telling " of your story is an essential act of self assertion, do not be put off by any potential " attacks " , you are not alone here. I often wonder if I'm extreme in my convection that XA, on balance, provides nothing of value. Your post reminds me of the common place horrors that are so acceptable in the " rooms " , I, myself, have not been active in for many years. Your graphic illustrations, anecdotal as they are, remain a far more powerful witness to the destructive nature of XA, than my analytical posts. Welcome to the list. Peace, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2001 Report Share Posted February 27, 2001 ggoble@... wrote: > I am not " sharing " what went on in the rooms, I am TELLING or > wittnessing what happens. I am taking the leep to do this. > > So much of this garbage had become so much a part of who I was that I > didn't even realize that what had happened was WRONG! > > I had long ago forgotten about that cold night until I discussed it > with a friend recently. She was shocked and I was shocked by her > even being shocked. I realized that all this time, I had > internalized stuff like this as being okay. > > This is why I came. I want to KNOW what is right and what is wrong. > > If I am in the wrong place to do this, just tell me the right place > to go. I don't want to waste anymore of my life. I do not think you are in the wrong place at all. While it can get rather rough and tumble here at times, I think most of the people here will respect your desire to be treated with respect. If, by some chance, someone should respond to your post in an unwarranted way please keep in mind that these are just words on a screen. In the past someone on the list attacked me by attributing the words of someone else to me. While this is not pleasant, a simple press of the delete key solves the problem. This is not a perfect place, people here are not perfect, and no guaranty can be made regarding everyone behaving with dignity. On the other hand, I have found most people here to be kind and thoughtful, I think you will find much useful support here. I will also mention that one of the characteristics of the 12 step paradigm is the " hierarchy of abuse " . Anyone staying in the " rooms " for anytime must find their place in this hierarchy. While you became the target of abuse, others took up positions as abusers. That you chose not to move up the ladder to become an abuser speaks volumes for your " sense of right and wrong " . Unfortunately, the only roll left to you in the twisted world of the 12 step faith healing movement is one of " target for the abusers " . I believe you will do very well on your journey to rediscover your " knowledge " of right and wrong. Your courage in the face of great injustice is inspiring. Your " telling " of your story is an essential act of self assertion, do not be put off by any potential " attacks " , you are not alone here. I often wonder if I'm extreme in my convection that XA, on balance, provides nothing of value. Your post reminds me of the common place horrors that are so acceptable in the " rooms " , I, myself, have not been active in for many years. Your graphic illustrations, anecdotal as they are, remain a far more powerful witness to the destructive nature of XA, than my analytical posts. Welcome to the list. Peace, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2001 Report Share Posted February 27, 2001 ggoble@... wrote: > I am not " sharing " what went on in the rooms, I am TELLING or > wittnessing what happens. I am taking the leep to do this. > > So much of this garbage had become so much a part of who I was that I > didn't even realize that what had happened was WRONG! > > I had long ago forgotten about that cold night until I discussed it > with a friend recently. She was shocked and I was shocked by her > even being shocked. I realized that all this time, I had > internalized stuff like this as being okay. > > This is why I came. I want to KNOW what is right and what is wrong. > > If I am in the wrong place to do this, just tell me the right place > to go. I don't want to waste anymore of my life. I do not think you are in the wrong place at all. While it can get rather rough and tumble here at times, I think most of the people here will respect your desire to be treated with respect. If, by some chance, someone should respond to your post in an unwarranted way please keep in mind that these are just words on a screen. In the past someone on the list attacked me by attributing the words of someone else to me. While this is not pleasant, a simple press of the delete key solves the problem. This is not a perfect place, people here are not perfect, and no guaranty can be made regarding everyone behaving with dignity. On the other hand, I have found most people here to be kind and thoughtful, I think you will find much useful support here. I will also mention that one of the characteristics of the 12 step paradigm is the " hierarchy of abuse " . Anyone staying in the " rooms " for anytime must find their place in this hierarchy. While you became the target of abuse, others took up positions as abusers. That you chose not to move up the ladder to become an abuser speaks volumes for your " sense of right and wrong " . Unfortunately, the only roll left to you in the twisted world of the 12 step faith healing movement is one of " target for the abusers " . I believe you will do very well on your journey to rediscover your " knowledge " of right and wrong. Your courage in the face of great injustice is inspiring. Your " telling " of your story is an essential act of self assertion, do not be put off by any potential " attacks " , you are not alone here. I often wonder if I'm extreme in my convection that XA, on balance, provides nothing of value. Your post reminds me of the common place horrors that are so acceptable in the " rooms " , I, myself, have not been active in for many years. Your graphic illustrations, anecdotal as they are, remain a far more powerful witness to the destructive nature of XA, than my analytical posts. Welcome to the list. Peace, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.