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[Guest guest]

HELP!!!!! I am so frustrated! My name is . I'm 30 (31

next Sunday-whaaaa!) I have 3 kids and am married(#2)and work full

time. I have had weight problems all mt life. I was always a chubby

kid and my highest weight was after I had my first baby-230lbs. I

then dropped to the lowest I have ever been-118lbs. Then I found my

ideal weight after I had my 2nd at 124-130lbs. After my 3rd I am now

180 and I can Not lose a single pound no matter what I do! I've

tried cutting fat, exercise, water-tons of it, cutting sugar and

carbs and every combination possible! I'm always tired and

miserable. I feel completely unatractive to my husband-who is 5

years younger than me and constantly has girls of 18-25 hitting on

him. I am very depressed. I've even tried getting support from an

online friend who lost weight the same way I did in the beginning

(cutting almost ALL fat) with no success. She's been a great source

of support but I'm just not getting any results and she really

doesn't understand that because she hasn't gained any of her weight

back. Sorry for going on and on I just don't know what else to do!

[Guest guest]

Hi

Welcome to the group, you will find a lot of support

in here. Hope to get to know you better in future

posts.

Hugs

Sue H.

=====

Anything that knocks you off track does so because you have allowed it to.

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[Guest guest]

Welcome ,

I'm Gena, 38, married with 2 girls, 19 and 13. At my heaviest I was

284, I'm 5'3 " . So far I am 206. First off, I have to tell you, stop

being so hard on yourself. You're weight is not who you are. One of the

things that Dr Phil says that I absolutely love is " Do not confuse self

image with body image. " . You need to look at yourself for who you are,

a wife, a mother. They love you! They need you. Taking care of yourself

and loving yourself, being happy will not just be good for you but make

them stronger and happier people too. So stop beating yourself up.

The next is and this is very important, DO NOT DIET! That's right, do

not diet. It ruins your metabolism and makes it harder to lose weight

the next time. That and it sets yourself up for failure. Diet implies

something that ends. What do you do instead? You change your lifestyle,

habits and behaviors. In order to lose weight and keep it off you have

to do things you can do for life. Some key things are portion control,

drink more water, get more active. It sounds simplistic but that really

is it. It is a matter of having the determination and being committed.

Wanting it bad enough. You have 3 kids who need you. There is your

motivation. Do this so you can be there for them and so that they learn

the right way to do things now so hopefully they will not have the

problem. If they see you dieting all the time and hating yourself then

that is the kind of attitude they are going to have too.

I highly recommend the Bob Greene book " Get With the Program. He gets

you to dig deep and really examine why you do things. He talks a lot

about building your self esteem and loving yourself before diet is even

mentioned. One main point is to get away from thinking that getting to

a certain size is going to make you happy. You have to love yourself on

the inside first. I hope some of this makes sense??

Go back and read lots of old posts. There is great info there to guide

you. We have been or all are where you are right now. You can do this.

We will be here for you.

Gena

> HELP!!!!!  I am so frustrated!  My name is . I am very

> depressed.  I've even tried getting support from an

> online friend who lost weight the same way I did in the beginning

> (cutting almost ALL fat) with no success.  She's been a great source

> of support but I'm just not getting any results and she really

> doesn't understand that because she hasn't gained any of her weight

> back.  Sorry for going on and on I just don't know what else to do!