Guest guest Posted February 6, 2001 Report Share Posted February 6, 2001 Hi, The best thing I've read, the most helpful and compassionate was a book called " Recovery Options " by Joeseph Volpicelli and Maia Szalavitz. While this book isn't overtly negative to AA, it does include important criticisms of AA and AA-based treatment centers. It also includes extensive resources and is how I found this list. There is more out there than just RR and AA and this is the only book I've ever seen that had a balanced presentation of the options. One thing that was helpful to me was understanding the phases of change: precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, maintenance (possibly relapse) and termination. These are the phases people go through in making any kind of major change, and there's a little bit different strategy to use in each. The author writes: " In selecting any nonemergency treatment, a crucial question to ask is what stage of change are you in. If you are in precontemplation or contemplation and haven't decided for yourself that your use needs to stop, entering an action-oriented program can do more harm than good. Your loved ones may try to push you to shoot for abstinence immediately, but if you truly don't believe that this is right for you or aren't genuinely convinced that you have drug problem, you should probably start with a program designed for people with these questions. " I can't find the quote now, but one thing he says in here is to keep trying! Many many people have struggled with it, seemingly unsuccessfully, until they finally were able to bring about the changes they needed to. People who try are more successful than people who don't try. Maybe you just haven't hit on the right combo that makes sense to you. For me, AA didn't work mainly because I didn't like and/or believe in the Higher Power notions, and other issues. I don't believe in total abstinence, so RR didn't work either. I went to a Smart Recovery meeting tonight and really enjoyed it. No one criticized me when I said that total abstinence was not my goal at this time, and, Aaaaaaaah, no Lord's Prayer at the end. Good luck to you! > Hello, > > I read RR and was trying to implement it in my life. > Well I ended up drinking. I know AA doesnt work for me but I m worried > because it seems nothing does. What I dont buy about RR is: nutrition doesnt > matter, it doesnt matter what your socio-economic class is (most addicted > people are low income level). > > Im confused, and I hope this question doesnt offend anyone but Im wondering > if it is true that some of us are more late stage than others. I mean Ive > been drinking on and off for over half of my life and all it has done in the > last 9 years is cause me pain. > > Why would I drink again? Its like I cant stop myself once I feel that > intense urge to drink. Im confuseed though because I dont buy the whole AA > concept that im just selfish and self-centered. I know better than to drink > but why cant I stop? I blackout ive lost my license for 4 years, I almost > got kicked out of my apt for turning the music so loud I want to quit but I > cant seem to. In the past Ive put myself in inpatient tx centers to dry out. > But I need to do this out of institutions or I will never be able to. > > Have any of the people on here had their lives turned upside down from > alcohol? If so how did you stay sober? All suggestion are welcome. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2001 Report Share Posted February 7, 2001 Hi , Im gonna get that book. One question though, do you get out of control when you drink or can you manage. Get back to me and let me know if you dont mind. >From: ahicks@... >Reply-To: 12-step-free >To: 12-step-free >Subject: To GrahJAG, Re: RR/AA >Date: Wed, 07 Feb 2001 07:38:15 -0000 > >Hi, > >The best thing I've read, the most helpful and compassionate was a >book called " Recovery Options " by Joeseph Volpicelli and Maia >Szalavitz. While this book isn't overtly negative to AA, it does >include important criticisms of AA and AA-based treatment centers. >It also includes extensive resources and is how I found this list. > >There is more out there than just RR and AA and this is the only book >I've ever seen that had a balanced presentation of the options. One >thing that was helpful to me was understanding the phases of change: >precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, maintenance >(possibly relapse) and termination. These are the phases people go >through in making any kind of major change, and there's a little bit >different strategy to use in each. > >The author writes: " In selecting any nonemergency treatment, a >crucial question to ask is what stage of change are you in. If you >are in precontemplation or contemplation and haven't decided for >yourself that your use needs to stop, entering an action-oriented >program can do more harm than good. Your loved ones may try to push >you to shoot for abstinence immediately, but if you truly don't >believe that this is right for you or aren't genuinely convinced that >you have drug problem, you should probably start with a program >designed for people with these questions. " > >I can't find the quote now, but one thing he says in here is to keep >trying! Many many people have struggled with it, seemingly >unsuccessfully, until they finally were able to bring about the >changes they needed to. People who try are more successful than >people who don't try. > >Maybe you just haven't hit on the right combo that makes sense to >you. For me, AA didn't work mainly because I didn't like and/or >believe in the Higher Power notions, and other issues. I don't >believe in total abstinence, so RR didn't work either. I went to a >Smart Recovery meeting tonight and really enjoyed it. No one >criticized me when I said that total abstinence was not my goal at >this time, and, > >Aaaaaaaah, no Lord's Prayer at the end. > >Good luck to you! > > > > > > Hello, > > > > I read RR and was trying to implement it in my life. > > Well I ended up drinking. I know AA doesnt work for me but I m >worried > > because it seems nothing does. What I dont buy about RR is: >nutrition doesnt > > matter, it doesnt matter what your socio-economic class is (most >addicted > > people are low income level). > > > > Im confused, and I hope this question doesnt offend anyone but Im >wondering > > if it is true that some of us are more late stage than others. I >mean Ive > > been drinking on and off for over half of my life and all it has >done in the > > last 9 years is cause me pain. > > > > Why would I drink again? Its like I cant stop myself once I feel >that > > intense urge to drink. Im confuseed though because I dont buy the >whole AA > > concept that im just selfish and self-centered. I know better than >to drink > > but why cant I stop? I blackout ive lost my license for 4 years, I >almost > > got kicked out of my apt for turning the music so loud I want to >quit but I > > cant seem to. In the past Ive put myself in inpatient tx centers >to dry out. > > But I need to do this out of institutions or I will never be able >to. > > > > Have any of the people on here had their lives turned upside down >from > > alcohol? If so how did you stay sober? All suggestion are welcome. > _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 7, 2001 Report Share Posted February 7, 2001 Hi , Im gonna get that book. One question though, do you get out of control when you drink or can you manage. Get back to me and let me know if you dont mind. >From: ahicks@... >Reply-To: 12-step-free >To: 12-step-free >Subject: To GrahJAG, Re: RR/AA >Date: Wed, 07 Feb 2001 07:38:15 -0000 > >Hi, > >The best thing I've read, the most helpful and compassionate was a >book called " Recovery Options " by Joeseph Volpicelli and Maia >Szalavitz. While this book isn't overtly negative to AA, it does >include important criticisms of AA and AA-based treatment centers. >It also includes extensive resources and is how I found this list. > >There is more out there than just RR and AA and this is the only book >I've ever seen that had a balanced presentation of the options. One >thing that was helpful to me was understanding the phases of change: >precontemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, maintenance >(possibly relapse) and termination. These are the phases people go >through in making any kind of major change, and there's a little bit >different strategy to use in each. > >The author writes: " In selecting any nonemergency treatment, a >crucial question to ask is what stage of change are you in. If you >are in precontemplation or contemplation and haven't decided for >yourself that your use needs to stop, entering an action-oriented >program can do more harm than good. Your loved ones may try to push >you to shoot for abstinence immediately, but if you truly don't >believe that this is right for you or aren't genuinely convinced that >you have drug problem, you should probably start with a program >designed for people with these questions. " > >I can't find the quote now, but one thing he says in here is to keep >trying! Many many people have struggled with it, seemingly >unsuccessfully, until they finally were able to bring about the >changes they needed to. People who try are more successful than >people who don't try. > >Maybe you just haven't hit on the right combo that makes sense to >you. For me, AA didn't work mainly because I didn't like and/or >believe in the Higher Power notions, and other issues. I don't >believe in total abstinence, so RR didn't work either. I went to a >Smart Recovery meeting tonight and really enjoyed it. No one >criticized me when I said that total abstinence was not my goal at >this time, and, > >Aaaaaaaah, no Lord's Prayer at the end. > >Good luck to you! > > > > > > Hello, > > > > I read RR and was trying to implement it in my life. > > Well I ended up drinking. I know AA doesnt work for me but I m >worried > > because it seems nothing does. What I dont buy about RR is: >nutrition doesnt > > matter, it doesnt matter what your socio-economic class is (most >addicted > > people are low income level). > > > > Im confused, and I hope this question doesnt offend anyone but Im >wondering > > if it is true that some of us are more late stage than others. I >mean Ive > > been drinking on and off for over half of my life and all it has >done in the > > last 9 years is cause me pain. > > > > Why would I drink again? Its like I cant stop myself once I feel >that > > intense urge to drink. Im confuseed though because I dont buy the >whole AA > > concept that im just selfish and self-centered. I know better than >to drink > > but why cant I stop? I blackout ive lost my license for 4 years, I >almost > > got kicked out of my apt for turning the music so loud I want to >quit but I > > cant seem to. In the past Ive put myself in inpatient tx centers >to dry out. > > But I need to do this out of institutions or I will never be able >to. > > > > Have any of the people on here had their lives turned upside down >from > > alcohol? If so how did you stay sober? All suggestion are welcome. > _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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