Guest guest Posted January 5, 2001 Report Share Posted January 5, 2001 hi all, It seems to me the woman had two choices. Of course she wouldn't have been in the situation had she been sober, but let's just say she was perfectly sober and she was pulled over for running a red light(something nearly as dangerous to others and self as driving under the influence) and were given the same two choices ........ Would she then strip if told to by the officer or would she refuse an accept whatever consequences ...... ? How 'bout postulating this: Who would be the "victim" if she had plowed into another vehicle and left someones soul smashed to pieces all over the road? another thought .... most police officers are required through the nature of thier job to be rescue personel at the scene of many accidents, far to many caused by drunk drivers. I have talked to several who do this for a living aboutb this particularly difficult aspect of thier resposibilityies and it is both an extremely difficult thig to do and absolutely heartbreaking almost everytime. I may not agree with his particular choice under the circumstances but maybe I would have given her a ride down to the morgue to have a damn good look at what she was fortunate to not have happen to her or someone she cared about. Finally, I was not there. I don't know the woman or the officer but it seems to me to be a significant stretch to start labeling someone an abusive redneck power tripping policeman from my easy chair in front of this safe and protective computer screen. There are infinate variables of posibilities engendered in the given situation, who am I to judge anyones behaviour or mental state except by the simple facts. One huge one pops into my mind. This woman was brandishing a huge deadly weopon, in an intoxicated condition, in a public place .......... I am not defending nor condemning anyone just thinking too much as I've often been "accused". I do expect everyone to accept responsibility for thier actions. steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 5, 2001 Report Share Posted January 5, 2001 hi all, It seems to me the woman had two choices. Of course she wouldn't have been in the situation had she been sober, but let's just say she was perfectly sober and she was pulled over for running a red light(something nearly as dangerous to others and self as driving under the influence) and were given the same two choices ........ Would she then strip if told to by the officer or would she refuse an accept whatever consequences ...... ? How 'bout postulating this: Who would be the "victim" if she had plowed into another vehicle and left someones soul smashed to pieces all over the road? another thought .... most police officers are required through the nature of thier job to be rescue personel at the scene of many accidents, far to many caused by drunk drivers. I have talked to several who do this for a living aboutb this particularly difficult aspect of thier resposibilityies and it is both an extremely difficult thig to do and absolutely heartbreaking almost everytime. I may not agree with his particular choice under the circumstances but maybe I would have given her a ride down to the morgue to have a damn good look at what she was fortunate to not have happen to her or someone she cared about. Finally, I was not there. I don't know the woman or the officer but it seems to me to be a significant stretch to start labeling someone an abusive redneck power tripping policeman from my easy chair in front of this safe and protective computer screen. There are infinate variables of posibilities engendered in the given situation, who am I to judge anyones behaviour or mental state except by the simple facts. One huge one pops into my mind. This woman was brandishing a huge deadly weopon, in an intoxicated condition, in a public place .......... I am not defending nor condemning anyone just thinking too much as I've often been "accused". I do expect everyone to accept responsibility for thier actions. steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 How DARE he insinuate that alcohol "made" the woman get ordered to str= ip nearly naked by this abusive, power-tripping policeman?? I just saw a news story about this where they interviewed the women on MSNBC - there were actually THREE women, not just the one. the officer has been suspended without pay Sue A Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 How DARE he insinuate that alcohol "made" the woman get ordered to str= ip nearly naked by this abusive, power-tripping policeman?? I just saw a news story about this where they interviewed the women on MSNBC - there were actually THREE women, not just the one. the officer has been suspended without pay Sue A Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 How DARE he insinuate that alcohol "made" the woman get ordered to str= ip nearly naked by this abusive, power-tripping policeman?? I just saw a news story about this where they interviewed the women on MSNBC - there were actually THREE women, not just the one. the officer has been suspended without pay Sue A Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 Hi All, I must take exception to > an even more extreme example of the AA-ceorcion type of rationalization.< I have never nor will I ever subsrcibe to any notion that aa is anything more than hokie nonsense parlayed upon good, well intentioned people at a desperate point in thier lives when thier self concept and grasp of will has been decimated, with no greater purpose, like all religions, than selfpurpetuation through brainwashing and fearmongering. And a little money-grubbing by a select few. The whole concept of religion has always given me the heebie-jeebies. I had an epiphany, while sitting in a church when I was seven years old, that the god thing was just a bunch of mumbo jumbo. You may think that that is a stretch but it is true. I have been in some pretty dark situations in my life, some that would make most people wet themselves and through my own concoction of philosophy, I have survived, and grown as a person in actualization of my self and my will over any external "stimulus". Of course, I have had doubts about my own will and self, and questions of purpose in this great accident of existance, I am human, and I feel a great deal of empathy for others who are struck at that same moment.......We all have have questions..... And when some "group" preys upon that moment of darkness of the soul for whatever sinister purpose, hidden or not, it makes me , well, it just pisses me off. We must all find our own way, but when someone is coerced to turn thier will and thier lives over to an external concept of omnipotence I believe that there occurs a little bit of living death for that person. ...... and that is a very sad thing. Nuff 'bout that. I apologize for not being more informed in my earlier response and thoughts regarding the suffolk co. incident. I was reponding to only what I had seen here and I do get a little pissy about drunk drivers. I should have gone to the url and informed myself. Duh. I accept my well deserved spanking. I am fortunate to live in a state of very small towns where 99.9 percent of the police officers are really great people who know thier neighbors and do not abuse others. I based my comments on my knowledge and experience with these fine people and that not all people having interactions with police are on thier best behaviour, ie; drunk and beligerent. I have misbehaved manytimes and have always been treated better than I probably should have. In a town of a couple thousand people where everybody knows everybody, we deal with things here on a more human level. We all too often see tragedy, the criminal justice response to that has little or no effect on the "offender", and these human timebombes are carousing around playing russian roulette with the lives and wellbeing of others. Often a creative approach has a more "moving" effect on the person. There are times when we should not neccessarily put the constitution in ou! r back pocket, but not wave it around so religiously and let two human beings get from point a to point b. That may seem a little simplistic to you but that big "us against them" mentality is more often a dead-end than human relationships need to be. As I said, I would not have given the woman the choice of walking home naked, but I would be inclined drive her home and to the tour of the morgue the next day if she had been intoxicated. I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. Steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 Hi All, I must take exception to > an even more extreme example of the AA-ceorcion type of rationalization.< I have never nor will I ever subsrcibe to any notion that aa is anything more than hokie nonsense parlayed upon good, well intentioned people at a desperate point in thier lives when thier self concept and grasp of will has been decimated, with no greater purpose, like all religions, than selfpurpetuation through brainwashing and fearmongering. And a little money-grubbing by a select few. The whole concept of religion has always given me the heebie-jeebies. I had an epiphany, while sitting in a church when I was seven years old, that the god thing was just a bunch of mumbo jumbo. You may think that that is a stretch but it is true. I have been in some pretty dark situations in my life, some that would make most people wet themselves and through my own concoction of philosophy, I have survived, and grown as a person in actualization of my self and my will over any external "stimulus". Of course, I have had doubts about my own will and self, and questions of purpose in this great accident of existance, I am human, and I feel a great deal of empathy for others who are struck at that same moment.......We all have have questions..... And when some "group" preys upon that moment of darkness of the soul for whatever sinister purpose, hidden or not, it makes me , well, it just pisses me off. We must all find our own way, but when someone is coerced to turn thier will and thier lives over to an external concept of omnipotence I believe that there occurs a little bit of living death for that person. ...... and that is a very sad thing. Nuff 'bout that. I apologize for not being more informed in my earlier response and thoughts regarding the suffolk co. incident. I was reponding to only what I had seen here and I do get a little pissy about drunk drivers. I should have gone to the url and informed myself. Duh. I accept my well deserved spanking. I am fortunate to live in a state of very small towns where 99.9 percent of the police officers are really great people who know thier neighbors and do not abuse others. I based my comments on my knowledge and experience with these fine people and that not all people having interactions with police are on thier best behaviour, ie; drunk and beligerent. I have misbehaved manytimes and have always been treated better than I probably should have. In a town of a couple thousand people where everybody knows everybody, we deal with things here on a more human level. We all too often see tragedy, the criminal justice response to that has little or no effect on the "offender", and these human timebombes are carousing around playing russian roulette with the lives and wellbeing of others. Often a creative approach has a more "moving" effect on the person. There are times when we should not neccessarily put the constitution in ou! r back pocket, but not wave it around so religiously and let two human beings get from point a to point b. That may seem a little simplistic to you but that big "us against them" mentality is more often a dead-end than human relationships need to be. As I said, I would not have given the woman the choice of walking home naked, but I would be inclined drive her home and to the tour of the morgue the next day if she had been intoxicated. I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. Steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 Hi All, I must take exception to > an even more extreme example of the AA-ceorcion type of rationalization.< I have never nor will I ever subsrcibe to any notion that aa is anything more than hokie nonsense parlayed upon good, well intentioned people at a desperate point in thier lives when thier self concept and grasp of will has been decimated, with no greater purpose, like all religions, than selfpurpetuation through brainwashing and fearmongering. And a little money-grubbing by a select few. The whole concept of religion has always given me the heebie-jeebies. I had an epiphany, while sitting in a church when I was seven years old, that the god thing was just a bunch of mumbo jumbo. You may think that that is a stretch but it is true. I have been in some pretty dark situations in my life, some that would make most people wet themselves and through my own concoction of philosophy, I have survived, and grown as a person in actualization of my self and my will over any external "stimulus". Of course, I have had doubts about my own will and self, and questions of purpose in this great accident of existance, I am human, and I feel a great deal of empathy for others who are struck at that same moment.......We all have have questions..... And when some "group" preys upon that moment of darkness of the soul for whatever sinister purpose, hidden or not, it makes me , well, it just pisses me off. We must all find our own way, but when someone is coerced to turn thier will and thier lives over to an external concept of omnipotence I believe that there occurs a little bit of living death for that person. ...... and that is a very sad thing. Nuff 'bout that. I apologize for not being more informed in my earlier response and thoughts regarding the suffolk co. incident. I was reponding to only what I had seen here and I do get a little pissy about drunk drivers. I should have gone to the url and informed myself. Duh. I accept my well deserved spanking. I am fortunate to live in a state of very small towns where 99.9 percent of the police officers are really great people who know thier neighbors and do not abuse others. I based my comments on my knowledge and experience with these fine people and that not all people having interactions with police are on thier best behaviour, ie; drunk and beligerent. I have misbehaved manytimes and have always been treated better than I probably should have. In a town of a couple thousand people where everybody knows everybody, we deal with things here on a more human level. We all too often see tragedy, the criminal justice response to that has little or no effect on the "offender", and these human timebombes are carousing around playing russian roulette with the lives and wellbeing of others. Often a creative approach has a more "moving" effect on the person. There are times when we should not neccessarily put the constitution in ou! r back pocket, but not wave it around so religiously and let two human beings get from point a to point b. That may seem a little simplistic to you but that big "us against them" mentality is more often a dead-end than human relationships need to be. As I said, I would not have given the woman the choice of walking home naked, but I would be inclined drive her home and to the tour of the morgue the next day if she had been intoxicated. I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. Steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 Hey all, so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in complete control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a facility where there would be witnesses, susequently more sophisticated testing equipment used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, opportunity to contact an attorney ..........hmmmmmmm. I'm still confused.....What rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark with all the perils that that encompasses? please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not comprehend her choice of the two options. steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 Hey all, so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in complete control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a facility where there would be witnesses, susequently more sophisticated testing equipment used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, opportunity to contact an attorney ..........hmmmmmmm. I'm still confused.....What rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark with all the perils that that encompasses? please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not comprehend her choice of the two options. steve Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 At 01:46 PM 1/6/01 -0500, you wrote: >I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this " officer " , male or >female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular >woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. According to the stories so far, this seems to have been his condition for not arresting them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 At 01:46 PM 1/6/01 -0500, you wrote: >I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this " officer " , male or >female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular >woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. According to the stories so far, this seems to have been his condition for not arresting them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 At 06:59 PM 1/6/01 -0500, you wrote: >Hey all, >so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in complete >control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a facility where >there would be witnesses, Police witnesses. The chance of a disinterested witness being present would be pretty slim. >susequently more sophisticated testing equipment >used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, If she's lucky, perhaps. Any reason to think she'd be lucky? FWIW, I was denied a blood test even though MA law states that everyone shall have one who wants one. The cops just ignored the law. And I have no idea what NY's laws are on the subject, nor did she in all likelihood. > opportunity >to contact an attorney .......... Maybe. But probably not for quite some time. And attorneys can be contacted the next day too. >hmmmmmmm. I'm still confused.....What >rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark with all >the perils that that encompasses? The cop was watching her walk, driving alongside her. >please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not >comprehend her choice of the two options. As you can see, I do. There are a *lot* of things I'd be willing to do rather than be arrested, with all the perils the latter encompasses. By comparison, walking five blocks under a policeman's leering eye sounds downright safe. At least the walk of humiliation would be over in minutes rather than months. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 At 06:59 PM 1/6/01 -0500, you wrote: >Hey all, >so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in complete >control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a facility where >there would be witnesses, Police witnesses. The chance of a disinterested witness being present would be pretty slim. >susequently more sophisticated testing equipment >used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, If she's lucky, perhaps. Any reason to think she'd be lucky? FWIW, I was denied a blood test even though MA law states that everyone shall have one who wants one. The cops just ignored the law. And I have no idea what NY's laws are on the subject, nor did she in all likelihood. > opportunity >to contact an attorney .......... Maybe. But probably not for quite some time. And attorneys can be contacted the next day too. >hmmmmmmm. I'm still confused.....What >rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark with all >the perils that that encompasses? The cop was watching her walk, driving alongside her. >please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not >comprehend her choice of the two options. As you can see, I do. There are a *lot* of things I'd be willing to do rather than be arrested, with all the perils the latter encompasses. By comparison, walking five blocks under a policeman's leering eye sounds downright safe. At least the walk of humiliation would be over in minutes rather than months. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 At 12:13 AM 1/7/01 +0000, you wrote: >I don't think it feels like a choice when an armed authority figure >presents the " option " of stripping. My opinion, the woman was sexually >assaulted, and choice did not enter into it. This is an excellent point. Cops in generally, and particularly the big-big-man variety, generally phrase everything as an order. It requires a lot of prior knowledge, not to mention tremendous grace under pressure, to resist these orders. While this particular order is one that couldn't possibly have held up in court as valid, that's not the case with many cops' bogus orders. These women were probably desperately frightened and wanting nothing more than to escape. ation often seems like the easiest way of escape from such a situation, just as many people will cooperate with a mugger rather than resisting. The third woman whose story was verified even stated explicitly that she chose to go along with his desire to see her breasts in the hope of ending the incident (he had already coerced her into standing in the cold for some time). One's choices seem much narrower when one is in such a situation. That cop is despicable. And Buddy T is also despicable, for implying that the victim's suffering was somehow a result of what he presumes to have been her drunkenness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 At 12:13 AM 1/7/01 +0000, you wrote: >I don't think it feels like a choice when an armed authority figure >presents the " option " of stripping. My opinion, the woman was sexually >assaulted, and choice did not enter into it. This is an excellent point. Cops in generally, and particularly the big-big-man variety, generally phrase everything as an order. It requires a lot of prior knowledge, not to mention tremendous grace under pressure, to resist these orders. While this particular order is one that couldn't possibly have held up in court as valid, that's not the case with many cops' bogus orders. These women were probably desperately frightened and wanting nothing more than to escape. ation often seems like the easiest way of escape from such a situation, just as many people will cooperate with a mugger rather than resisting. The third woman whose story was verified even stated explicitly that she chose to go along with his desire to see her breasts in the hope of ending the incident (he had already coerced her into standing in the cold for some time). One's choices seem much narrower when one is in such a situation. That cop is despicable. And Buddy T is also despicable, for implying that the victim's suffering was somehow a result of what he presumes to have been her drunkenness. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 sparkydawg69@... wrote: I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. Steve Hi Steve and list, Let me start by acknowledging your recantation of your previous position on this matter, too often we respond to criticism anger and thoughtlessness. If we are not open to reasoned critiques, we shut the door to intellectual growth. As to being "bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive", you should be. I am assuming from your post that you would not have felt compelled by the situation described by the targets of abuse to comply with the officers demands that you strip. Considering the kinds of open threats the officer made as a means of coercion, DU charges, lose of social standing, possible difficulty pursuing my career path, spending the night in jail, exposure of my misdeeds to my parents, I would not have complied with his request. I too would have probably told the officer to go f**k himself. Both you and I however, may take into the situation a whole different set of beliefs about who we are, who the police are, what constitutes dignity, what legal rights we have, and weather or not the threats are viable. In addition there were many implied threats made by handcuffing, confining, and isolating these women which we would not necessarily have inferred from the same circumstances Given that our culture here in North America strongly emphasizes a male dominated authoritarian structure, the compliance of these women when faced with these overt and implied threats is not surprising at all. We should all be bothered by living in a culture that gives women (and men for that matter) good reasons for following the course of action these "victims" chose as their safest way out. I believe we all have a better chance of understanding each other if we first accept that we all see the world from different perspectives. I look forward to any response you or others may have. Peace, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 sparkydawg69@... wrote: I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. Steve Hi Steve and list, Let me start by acknowledging your recantation of your previous position on this matter, too often we respond to criticism anger and thoughtlessness. If we are not open to reasoned critiques, we shut the door to intellectual growth. As to being "bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive", you should be. I am assuming from your post that you would not have felt compelled by the situation described by the targets of abuse to comply with the officers demands that you strip. Considering the kinds of open threats the officer made as a means of coercion, DU charges, lose of social standing, possible difficulty pursuing my career path, spending the night in jail, exposure of my misdeeds to my parents, I would not have complied with his request. I too would have probably told the officer to go f**k himself. Both you and I however, may take into the situation a whole different set of beliefs about who we are, who the police are, what constitutes dignity, what legal rights we have, and weather or not the threats are viable. In addition there were many implied threats made by handcuffing, confining, and isolating these women which we would not necessarily have inferred from the same circumstances Given that our culture here in North America strongly emphasizes a male dominated authoritarian structure, the compliance of these women when faced with these overt and implied threats is not surprising at all. We should all be bothered by living in a culture that gives women (and men for that matter) good reasons for following the course of action these "victims" chose as their safest way out. I believe we all have a better chance of understanding each other if we first accept that we all see the world from different perspectives. I look forward to any response you or others may have. Peace, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 sparkydawg69@... wrote: I am still bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive ......especially since the particular woman who instigated this discussion was not even legally intoxicated. Steve Hi Steve and list, Let me start by acknowledging your recantation of your previous position on this matter, too often we respond to criticism anger and thoughtlessness. If we are not open to reasoned critiques, we shut the door to intellectual growth. As to being "bothered by why any of the victims of this "officer", male or female, would strip at his directive", you should be. I am assuming from your post that you would not have felt compelled by the situation described by the targets of abuse to comply with the officers demands that you strip. Considering the kinds of open threats the officer made as a means of coercion, DU charges, lose of social standing, possible difficulty pursuing my career path, spending the night in jail, exposure of my misdeeds to my parents, I would not have complied with his request. I too would have probably told the officer to go f**k himself. Both you and I however, may take into the situation a whole different set of beliefs about who we are, who the police are, what constitutes dignity, what legal rights we have, and weather or not the threats are viable. In addition there were many implied threats made by handcuffing, confining, and isolating these women which we would not necessarily have inferred from the same circumstances Given that our culture here in North America strongly emphasizes a male dominated authoritarian structure, the compliance of these women when faced with these overt and implied threats is not surprising at all. We should all be bothered by living in a culture that gives women (and men for that matter) good reasons for following the course of action these "victims" chose as their safest way out. I believe we all have a better chance of understanding each other if we first accept that we all see the world from different perspectives. I look forward to any response you or others may have. Peace, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 Curious if this woman had prior drinking arrests...? Speaking from the perspective of a woman with prior DUI arrests, jail and aa sentencing..... In my past drinking/driving days: If I would have been pulled over and HAD been drinking, I would have gladly walked a mile in the snow in my undies and really high heels to AVOID A REPEAT of a jail experience. If I had NOT been drinking, there is NO WAY. Certainly this officers behavior is completely unacceptable, but I'd almost bet that this was not her first experience with drinking and driving and the ramifications. I lean toward the theory that she must've felt that " chilly little walk " was better than what she may have faced otherwise. Must've been a reason she felt that way. Had she faced jail before? Let me repeat that the cop was wrong. However, I totally agree that she did have a choice here. I personally think that her choice speaks volumes about her state of mind, and that doesn't seem to spell innocent. ue > >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups >To: 12-step-freeegroups >Subject: Re: Suffolk Co. Incident (was: About Recovery - >Training t... >Date: Sun, 07 Jan 2001 00:13:44 -0000 > > > > Hey all, > > so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in >complete > > control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a >facility where > > there would be witnesses, susequently more sophisticated testing >equipment > > used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, >opportunity > > to contact an attorney ..........hmmmmmmm. I'm still >confused.....What > > rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark >with all > > the perils that that encompasses? > > > > please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not > > comprehend her choice of the two options. > >I don't think it feels like a choice when an armed authority figure >presents the " option " of stripping. My opinion, the woman was sexually >assaulted, and choice did not enter into it. > >judith > > > > _________________________________________________________________ Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 Everyone- I believe that when stopped by an officer it is acceptable to ask for them to call their backup if you're uncomfortable with the way the encounter has been going. The officer would probably be insulted and annoyed with this request and you are probably guaranteed a ticket after they go through that additional trouble, but it may be valuable for the ladies in the egroup to remember. I also understand that the woman in Suffolk Co. wanted to avoid a ticket and end the stop done with as quickly as possible, so calling in other officers was the last thing she would have done, but it's worth noting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 I know of no reason to believe that all of the five women who have spoken up so far are a bunch of habitual drunks. What is it with this desire to blame the victim? There are many, many people in the world who will do whatever a cop tells them. There are also many people who will comply with whatever demands an armed criminal makes, regardless of whether or not that criminal is wearing a tin badge. Yes, technically they had a choice. If I held a gun to your head and ordered " strip or die, " technically you would have a choice. Does that mean you're to blame? Many women will comply, to a greater or lesser extent, with attackers in incidents up to and including physical assault. " If I cooperate and act nice, maybe he won't hurt me. " This isn't completely reasonable and often doesn't work well in practice, but it's how a lot of people's minds work when faced with that sort of situation. Think of a teenager who lives with her parents, and cannot imagine the humiliation of telling them that she has been arrested. Think of a woman in the wee hours of the morning, exhausted and frightened and wanting nothing more than to get home to her warm house and her family. Think of a respectable woman who believes jails are where all the bad people are, and is stricken with panic at the idea of being caged up with criminals. Is it reasonable to expect all of these people, each and every one of them, to conclude calmly " Since he has no official legal right to do this, I'll just go ahead and get arrested for hours, and get a lawyer later. I trust the system, and I don't mind going with this crazy man " ? We have no idea how many women have been the targets of his sick attention. Perhaps some or many of them *did* choose to be arrested in the hope of straightening it out later. But it's absurd to assert that a woman must be bad and guilty merely because she didn't make the choice which seems best to us as we sit in our warm and comfortable houses. In a situation like that, with an armed man leering at you and barking orders, there may well seem to be no viable choice at all. At 02:40 AM 1/7/01 +0000, you wrote: > Curious if this woman had prior drinking arrests...? > > Speaking from the perspective of a woman with prior > DUI arrests, jail and aa sentencing..... > > In my past drinking/driving days: > > If I would have been pulled over and HAD been drinking, I would > have gladly walked a mile in the snow in my undies and > really high heels to > AVOID A REPEAT of a jail experience. > > If I had NOT been drinking, there is NO WAY. > > Certainly this officers behavior is completely unacceptable, > but I'd almost bet that this was not her first experience > with drinking and driving and the ramifications. I lean > toward the theory that she must've felt that " chilly little > walk " was better than what she may have faced otherwise. > Must've been a reason she felt that way. Had she faced jail > before? > > Let me repeat that the cop was wrong. However, I totally > agree that she did have a choice here. > > I personally think that her choice speaks volumes about her > state of mind, and that doesn't seem to spell innocent. > > ue > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups > >To: 12-step-freeegroups > >Subject: Re: Suffolk Co. Incident (was: About Recovery - > >Training t... > >Date: Sun, 07 Jan 2001 00:13:44 -0000 > > > > > > > Hey all, > > > so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in > >complete > > > control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a > >facility where > > > there would be witnesses, susequently more sophisticated testing > >equipment > > > used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, > >opportunity > > > to contact an attorney ..........hmmmmmmm. I'm still > >confused.....What > > > rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark > >with all > > > the perils that that encompasses? > > > > > > please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not > > > comprehend her choice of the two options. > > > >I don't think it feels like a choice when an armed authority figure > >presents the " option " of stripping. My opinion, the woman was sexually > >assaulted, and choice did not enter into it. > > > >judith > > > > > > > > > >_________________________________________________________________ >Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 I know of no reason to believe that all of the five women who have spoken up so far are a bunch of habitual drunks. What is it with this desire to blame the victim? There are many, many people in the world who will do whatever a cop tells them. There are also many people who will comply with whatever demands an armed criminal makes, regardless of whether or not that criminal is wearing a tin badge. Yes, technically they had a choice. If I held a gun to your head and ordered " strip or die, " technically you would have a choice. Does that mean you're to blame? Many women will comply, to a greater or lesser extent, with attackers in incidents up to and including physical assault. " If I cooperate and act nice, maybe he won't hurt me. " This isn't completely reasonable and often doesn't work well in practice, but it's how a lot of people's minds work when faced with that sort of situation. Think of a teenager who lives with her parents, and cannot imagine the humiliation of telling them that she has been arrested. Think of a woman in the wee hours of the morning, exhausted and frightened and wanting nothing more than to get home to her warm house and her family. Think of a respectable woman who believes jails are where all the bad people are, and is stricken with panic at the idea of being caged up with criminals. Is it reasonable to expect all of these people, each and every one of them, to conclude calmly " Since he has no official legal right to do this, I'll just go ahead and get arrested for hours, and get a lawyer later. I trust the system, and I don't mind going with this crazy man " ? We have no idea how many women have been the targets of his sick attention. Perhaps some or many of them *did* choose to be arrested in the hope of straightening it out later. But it's absurd to assert that a woman must be bad and guilty merely because she didn't make the choice which seems best to us as we sit in our warm and comfortable houses. In a situation like that, with an armed man leering at you and barking orders, there may well seem to be no viable choice at all. At 02:40 AM 1/7/01 +0000, you wrote: > Curious if this woman had prior drinking arrests...? > > Speaking from the perspective of a woman with prior > DUI arrests, jail and aa sentencing..... > > In my past drinking/driving days: > > If I would have been pulled over and HAD been drinking, I would > have gladly walked a mile in the snow in my undies and > really high heels to > AVOID A REPEAT of a jail experience. > > If I had NOT been drinking, there is NO WAY. > > Certainly this officers behavior is completely unacceptable, > but I'd almost bet that this was not her first experience > with drinking and driving and the ramifications. I lean > toward the theory that she must've felt that " chilly little > walk " was better than what she may have faced otherwise. > Must've been a reason she felt that way. Had she faced jail > before? > > Let me repeat that the cop was wrong. However, I totally > agree that she did have a choice here. > > I personally think that her choice speaks volumes about her > state of mind, and that doesn't seem to spell innocent. > > ue > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups > >To: 12-step-freeegroups > >Subject: Re: Suffolk Co. Incident (was: About Recovery - > >Training t... > >Date: Sun, 07 Jan 2001 00:13:44 -0000 > > > > > > > Hey all, > > > so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in > >complete > > > control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a > >facility where > > > there would be witnesses, susequently more sophisticated testing > >equipment > > > used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, > >opportunity > > > to contact an attorney ..........hmmmmmmm. I'm still > >confused.....What > > > rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark > >with all > > > the perils that that encompasses? > > > > > > please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not > > > comprehend her choice of the two options. > > > >I don't think it feels like a choice when an armed authority figure > >presents the " option " of stripping. My opinion, the woman was sexually > >assaulted, and choice did not enter into it. > > > >judith > > > > > > > > > >_________________________________________________________________ >Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 I know of no reason to believe that all of the five women who have spoken up so far are a bunch of habitual drunks. What is it with this desire to blame the victim? There are many, many people in the world who will do whatever a cop tells them. There are also many people who will comply with whatever demands an armed criminal makes, regardless of whether or not that criminal is wearing a tin badge. Yes, technically they had a choice. If I held a gun to your head and ordered " strip or die, " technically you would have a choice. Does that mean you're to blame? Many women will comply, to a greater or lesser extent, with attackers in incidents up to and including physical assault. " If I cooperate and act nice, maybe he won't hurt me. " This isn't completely reasonable and often doesn't work well in practice, but it's how a lot of people's minds work when faced with that sort of situation. Think of a teenager who lives with her parents, and cannot imagine the humiliation of telling them that she has been arrested. Think of a woman in the wee hours of the morning, exhausted and frightened and wanting nothing more than to get home to her warm house and her family. Think of a respectable woman who believes jails are where all the bad people are, and is stricken with panic at the idea of being caged up with criminals. Is it reasonable to expect all of these people, each and every one of them, to conclude calmly " Since he has no official legal right to do this, I'll just go ahead and get arrested for hours, and get a lawyer later. I trust the system, and I don't mind going with this crazy man " ? We have no idea how many women have been the targets of his sick attention. Perhaps some or many of them *did* choose to be arrested in the hope of straightening it out later. But it's absurd to assert that a woman must be bad and guilty merely because she didn't make the choice which seems best to us as we sit in our warm and comfortable houses. In a situation like that, with an armed man leering at you and barking orders, there may well seem to be no viable choice at all. At 02:40 AM 1/7/01 +0000, you wrote: > Curious if this woman had prior drinking arrests...? > > Speaking from the perspective of a woman with prior > DUI arrests, jail and aa sentencing..... > > In my past drinking/driving days: > > If I would have been pulled over and HAD been drinking, I would > have gladly walked a mile in the snow in my undies and > really high heels to > AVOID A REPEAT of a jail experience. > > If I had NOT been drinking, there is NO WAY. > > Certainly this officers behavior is completely unacceptable, > but I'd almost bet that this was not her first experience > with drinking and driving and the ramifications. I lean > toward the theory that she must've felt that " chilly little > walk " was better than what she may have faced otherwise. > Must've been a reason she felt that way. Had she faced jail > before? > > Let me repeat that the cop was wrong. However, I totally > agree that she did have a choice here. > > I personally think that her choice speaks volumes about her > state of mind, and that doesn't seem to spell innocent. > > ue > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >Reply-To: 12-step-freeegroups > >To: 12-step-freeegroups > >Subject: Re: Suffolk Co. Incident (was: About Recovery - > >Training t... > >Date: Sun, 07 Jan 2001 00:13:44 -0000 > > > > > > > Hey all, > > > so,let me try to grasp this...... Woman is not intoxicated and in > >complete > > > control of her faculties... if arrested, would be taken to a > >facility where > > > there would be witnesses, susequently more sophisticated testing > >equipment > > > used with the oportunity to have a blood test done at a hospital, > >opportunity > > > to contact an attorney ..........hmmmmmmm. I'm still > >confused.....What > > > rational person would opt to strip naked and walk home in the dark > >with all > > > the perils that that encompasses? > > > > > > please excuse me, maybe I have missed something, but I still do not > > > comprehend her choice of the two options. > > > >I don't think it feels like a choice when an armed authority figure > >presents the " option " of stripping. My opinion, the woman was sexually > >assaulted, and choice did not enter into it. > > > >judith > > > > > > > > > >_________________________________________________________________ >Get your FREE download of MSN Explorer at http://explorer.msn.com Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 6, 2001 Report Share Posted January 6, 2001 At 09:16 PM 1/6/01 -0600, you wrote: >I believe that when stopped by an officer it is acceptable to ask for them >to call their backup if you're uncomfortable with the way the encounter >has been going. I have also heard it suggested that a woman (or man, I guess) ask the officer to follow her to a well-lit public area before interacting with him. In theory the cop should accede, although in practice you'd probably be guaranteeing yourself a ticket or arrest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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