Re: Will I get my brain back

February 5, 2006

I feel for you!!!!! I had my first surgery in 2001 (3

in 3 years total) and I didn't get my brain back till

last week !!!!! It was like I was living in a fog and

it would take hours of reminding myself to remember a

simple task in the afternoon. Anyway, long story

short about 6 months ago I started having terrible

panic attacks. I went to my GP and explained the

situation. He put me on an anti anxiety/anti

depressent. WOW I can think !!!!! I wake up feeling

refreshed (how many years has that been ) I remember

appts., I can breeze through simple things that would

have taken hours. It's amazing ! I am definately not

saying that this would work for everyone but I really

do wonder because a lot of seem to have the same

foggieness and forgetfulness and loads of other

symtpoms. I truly believe that your thyroid controls

so much more than we'll ever know.

Sorry such a long reply.

Good Luck to you !!!

TT 01 PAP

Modified neck dissection 01 Nodes pos

Modified neck dissection 03 Nodes pos

First clean scan 5/05

--- rjane1955 wrote:

> Man this can get me sobbing. Just before my goiter

> was found and

> the thyroiditis, I had just started telling my 2

> docs that I felt

> like I had brain damage and that I wanted my brain

> back. It has made

> accomplishing things in my day, so so so hard. And

> now, since

> surgery, my brain is worse. I realize I've got a

> trunkload of

> psyche stuff from the cancer word, to move through

> and that's in the

> brain, competing for my attention. Before my goiter

> was found,

> doing a household task had got to where it felt like

> doing a

> calculus test and regular math is enough of a

> challenge to me. I

> knew there was a time I could do housework without

> thnking about

> what I was doing much. I want a brain back to where

> I can be

> functional. Where I don't have to extend 150% brain

> power to get

> one thing done, back to where I can use 20% to get

> things done.

> Will it happen ? How long does it take? My thyroid

> was removed cuz

> of cancer and I am on 200 my levothyroxine since Dec

> 9. My tsh as

> of Dec 7 was 163 (good reason to not have follow up

> by the

> surgeon.) I have a 1.5 cm growth on my left

> adrenal. Tests have

> shown the epenephrines are high. We're doing more

> test to rule out

> high cuz of stress. What do whacked out adrenals do

> to brain

> power ? The thought of not getting my brain back

> puts me into

> sobs. It means there's really not much I can

> accomplish in a day.

> Energy is good, but the brain puts together the

> ability to do a

> task, to figure out how it needs to be done and what

> with and what

> first, second, third. I feel overwhelmed at the

> simplest task.

> Since I've only done 8 weeks on the med and I think

> it will be

> increased, the only thing I really can do is wait

> till my brain

> comes back and in the meantime do just what I can.

> But that gets me

> crying cuz I don't want it to be that way for the

> rest of my life --

> doing what I can do. I want a brain where I can get

> back to

> juggling all the balls in a day that I used to be

> able to do. What

> gets me is feeling overwhelmed at things I consider

> doing. The last

> 3 yrs when brain wasn't working well, I pushed

> myself 150% and I

> wont do that anymore. I will work up to what I'm

> capable of, but

> not push myself to have to do more.

>

> So those who've done hypo and hyper, do you get your

> brain back.

> Energy is back for me, brain to do stuff, isn't

> here.

>

> sad jane in us

>

__________________________________________________

February 5, 2006

I feel for you!!!!! I had my first surgery in 2001 (3

in 3 years total) and I didn't get my brain back till

last week !!!!! It was like I was living in a fog and

it would take hours of reminding myself to remember a

simple task in the afternoon. Anyway, long story

short about 6 months ago I started having terrible

panic attacks. I went to my GP and explained the

situation. He put me on an anti anxiety/anti

depressent. WOW I can think !!!!! I wake up feeling

refreshed (how many years has that been ) I remember

appts., I can breeze through simple things that would

have taken hours. It's amazing ! I am definately not

saying that this would work for everyone but I really

do wonder because a lot of seem to have the same

foggieness and forgetfulness and loads of other

symtpoms. I truly believe that your thyroid controls

so much more than we'll ever know.

Sorry such a long reply.

Good Luck to you !!!

TT 01 PAP

Modified neck dissection 01 Nodes pos

Modified neck dissection 03 Nodes pos

First clean scan 5/05

--- rjane1955 wrote:

> Man this can get me sobbing. Just before my goiter

> was found and

> the thyroiditis, I had just started telling my 2

> docs that I felt

> like I had brain damage and that I wanted my brain

> back. It has made

> accomplishing things in my day, so so so hard. And

> now, since

> surgery, my brain is worse. I realize I've got a

> trunkload of

> psyche stuff from the cancer word, to move through

> and that's in the

> brain, competing for my attention. Before my goiter

> was found,

> doing a household task had got to where it felt like

> doing a

> calculus test and regular math is enough of a

> challenge to me. I

> knew there was a time I could do housework without

> thnking about

> what I was doing much. I want a brain back to where

> I can be

> functional. Where I don't have to extend 150% brain

> power to get

> one thing done, back to where I can use 20% to get

> things done.

> Will it happen ? How long does it take? My thyroid

> was removed cuz

> of cancer and I am on 200 my levothyroxine since Dec

> 9. My tsh as

> of Dec 7 was 163 (good reason to not have follow up

> by the

> surgeon.) I have a 1.5 cm growth on my left

> adrenal. Tests have

> shown the epenephrines are high. We're doing more

> test to rule out

> high cuz of stress. What do whacked out adrenals do

> to brain

> power ? The thought of not getting my brain back

> puts me into

> sobs. It means there's really not much I can

> accomplish in a day.

> Energy is good, but the brain puts together the

> ability to do a

> task, to figure out how it needs to be done and what

> with and what

> first, second, third. I feel overwhelmed at the

> simplest task.

> Since I've only done 8 weeks on the med and I think

> it will be

> increased, the only thing I really can do is wait

> till my brain

> comes back and in the meantime do just what I can.

> But that gets me

> crying cuz I don't want it to be that way for the

> rest of my life --

> doing what I can do. I want a brain where I can get

> back to

> juggling all the balls in a day that I used to be

> able to do. What

> gets me is feeling overwhelmed at things I consider

> doing. The last

> 3 yrs when brain wasn't working well, I pushed

> myself 150% and I

> wont do that anymore. I will work up to what I'm

> capable of, but

> not push myself to have to do more.

>

> So those who've done hypo and hyper, do you get your

> brain back.

> Energy is back for me, brain to do stuff, isn't

> here.

>

> sad jane in us

>

__________________________________________________

February 5, 2006

Thanks . Before thyroid stuff happened, I was already on 2

antid's and still am. Reading your post, I thought about us thyca's

having to be a bit hyper can have anxiety come along with it. When

thy meds get optimal in me, I may need to talk to my doc of

switching meds around to ones that target anxiety more. Before

thyroid stuff, when I started talking to docs of feeling like I had

brain damage, 2 said it may be some of the meds I'm on. One doc is

waiting for thy meds to get optimal in me, then start weaning me off

meds that have negative effects as I complain about, in my brain. I

have tried so many kinds of antid's and could tolerate very few of

them because a lot of them had me feel like I had too much caffeine,

then my shoulders are tight all the time and that's uncomfortable.

Doc says I'm in that 1% crowd cuz literature says 1% are effected

like I experienced it. But, yeh, some of what's been medicated has

not turned out to be about a whacked thyroid, so it may be when all

things get optimal in me, psycho meds may need to be changed cuz

symptoms they were for treating may not be there anymore, and new

hyper thy symptoms may need to be medicated if it interferes in my

brain working. I'd never connected till your post that running a

little hyper means living with anxiety and that can impact how much

brain I feel is left to use to do stuff with. Ok, one more

alternative to keep in mind. Thanks. And may you find your antid's

to continue improving the quality of your life. I first went on

them 17 yrs ago and I'm just one of those people that life is just

too hard without antid's.

jane

>

> > Man this can get me sobbing. Just before my goiter

> > was found and

> > the thyroiditis, I had just started telling my 2

> > docs that I felt

> > like I had brain damage and that I wanted my brain

> > back. It has made

> > accomplishing things in my day, so so so hard. And

> > now, since

> > surgery, my brain is worse. I realize I've got a

> > trunkload of

> > psyche stuff from the cancer word, to move through

> > and that's in the

> > brain, competing for my attention. Before my goiter

> > was found,

> > doing a household task had got to where it felt like

> > doing a

> > calculus test and regular math is enough of a

> > challenge to me. I

> > knew there was a time I could do housework without

> > thnking about

> > what I was doing much. I want a brain back to where

> > I can be

> > functional. Where I don't have to extend 150% brain

> > power to get

> > one thing done, back to where I can use 20% to get

> > things done.

> > Will it happen ? How long does it take? My thyroid

> > was removed cuz

> > of cancer and I am on 200 my levothyroxine since Dec

> > 9. My tsh as

> > of Dec 7 was 163 (good reason to not have follow up

> > by the

> > surgeon.) I have a 1.5 cm growth on my left

> > adrenal. Tests have

> > shown the epenephrines are high. We're doing more

> > test to rule out

> > high cuz of stress. What do whacked out adrenals do

> > to brain

> > power ? The thought of not getting my brain back

> > puts me into

> > sobs. It means there's really not much I can

> > accomplish in a day.

> > Energy is good, but the brain puts together the

> > ability to do a

> > task, to figure out how it needs to be done and what

> > with and what

> > first, second, third. I feel overwhelmed at the

> > simplest task.

> > Since I've only done 8 weeks on the med and I think

> > it will be

> > increased, the only thing I really can do is wait

> > till my brain

> > comes back and in the meantime do just what I can.

> > But that gets me

> > crying cuz I don't want it to be that way for the

> > rest of my life --

> > doing what I can do. I want a brain where I can get

> > back to

> > juggling all the balls in a day that I used to be

> > able to do. What

> > gets me is feeling overwhelmed at things I consider

> > doing. The last

> > 3 yrs when brain wasn't working well, I pushed

> > myself 150% and I

> > wont do that anymore. I will work up to what I'm

> > capable of, but

> > not push myself to have to do more.

> >

> > So those who've done hypo and hyper, do you get your

> > brain back.

> > Energy is back for me, brain to do stuff, isn't

> > here.

> >

> > sad jane in us

> >

>

> __________________________________________________

>

February 5, 2006

Boy, did this bring back memories for me.

At my lowest, I had trouble boiling water. I'm not kidding, I can't tell you how many times I put a pot of water on the stove to heat and checked it three times over fifteen minutes to see if it was boiling yet and THEN realized I'd not turned on the stove burner.

You can laugh... I do, looking back... but at the time... it was devastating.

How about getting up in the morning.. put on shirt, but not pants, and heading out of the bedroom to go to the bathroom... and I wasn't alone in the house?

How about the time a friend was picking me up and I had everything ready so that all I had to do was pull on my coat, grab my techie bag (with all the gear that I had packed in it to work on computers) and head out the door.... and realized as I stepped out into the cold rain that I'd not put on shoes or socks?

I used a PDA and made notes. Notes of what I was thinking, notes of what I wanted to do. And concentrated on celebrating what I got done and ignoring what I hadn't... It fester on what I'd not done in a day drove me insane.

It gets better. I juggle like my old self again, doing ten things at once, without notes!

Typical chore day...

Wake, check pulse, take first dose of meds, sort laundry, strip bed.

Head to bathroom, head to office run through emails.

Head to kitchen, start sink of water running for dishes. Head to bedroom grab sorted laundry. Shut off water in kitchen sink on the way through the kitchen as I head downstairs to start laundry.

Back to the kitchen, put dishes in sink to soak, start bread dough. By the time the dough is set for first rise the washer is full and I can jump in the shower, not enough water pressure here you have to coordinate water usage.

Back in the bedroom to dress and make bed with second set of sheets. Back in the kitchen. Slosh through the first load of dishes then head to the basement to put dryer laundry in the dryer and hanging laundry is brought upstairs to hang to dry. Punch down the bread dough. Start pot of water to cook pasta or rice.

Start cooking meat and make gravy (I do a lot of turkey burger concoctions, its cheap and I like it), toss in pasta or rice when water is ready. As soon as food is cooked set aside to cool. Put away the dried dishes.

Shape bread dough for loaves/rolls/buns and set to rise. Slosh through next load of dishes. Start batter for whatever else I might be baking that day. Put bread in oven to bake, put batter in pans so that as soon as the bread comes out it goes in the oven. Put the dry dishes away.

Slosh through the last of the dishes, get the stuff out of the dryer and put the dried laundry away. Check emails.

Pull bread out of the oven put in the pans of brownie/cake/pie/biscuits...whatever.

Flip the breads over/out of pans to crust and get it ready to freeze. Wash the pans

Sit and wait for the stuff in the oven to bake.

Take the stuff out of the oven to cool. Set up my mini meals for the next three days. Wash up anything that still needs washing, wipe down counters and top of stove. Sit and stare out the window for ten minutes while the last of the dishes dry... put the dishes away... all done. Total elapsed time: 3 hrs.

A couple of hours later I collect the laundry that was hanging and get it put away. All done.

On days that I'm not doing laundry and shower I'm doing maintenance on computers at the same time as I'm doing the kitchen stuff... that's the two main Internet machines in the house, one here, in my office, the other in the kitchen... So I'm bopping back and forth between them as I do spyware and virus upgrades, run the scans and do the backups.... although I've set up a new automated backup system that will pretty much takes care of itself... I just have to sit down to change the disks to do the burns, the machines will be running the backups all by themselves.

So... my point is that it does come back. The hard part is waiting for your body and brain to get themselves fixed again. Once the hormones are right and your mind and body can get things back in place and working right again. It comes back.

Oh... laundry when I was bad.... ? I went down the stairs backwards, dragging the box of laundry with me, bouncing it one step at a time. Then I sat at the bottom of the stairs to rest. When I was rested enough I'd carry the box the ten feet from the bottom of the stairs to the washer. Start the laundry and then sit at the bottom of the stairs to wait for it to wash. I didn't have the strength or energy to go upstairs and come back down, then go back up the stairs. I just sat and waited. When the washer was done all the wet laundry was put in the box and hauled back upstairs where I'd sit in an chair and rest for a while, then I'd hang the went laundry over the deck railings to dry. Then I'd go lay down. A few hours later, when I was rested enough. I could collect my laundry off the deck and put it back in the box and go rest again. That's all I did on that day, just the laundry.. that's all I could do in one day.

Take each day, one day at a time. Don't compare what you can do now to what you did before your body broke. Compare what you do today to what you could do last week. And next week you compare to what you can to today and what you could do last week.... and so on.... and suddenly you realize that you are doing a little more, a little faster, a little easier.

One day you'll be in the middle of doing something and realize that you're doing something without thinking about it at all, it just came naturally..... and that's when you realize it's working, that you're coming back....

That is awesome... when you see it coming back. It happens. That's why you can't give up. That's why you keep working at helping your body be better.... as your body gets better, your brain gets better, it's able to work better again, just like your muscles and your insides.... it gets better.

Don't ever give up.

Pushing... don't push... work to your limit. Stop. If you push, you strain, both your mind and body. If you strain, then your body has to heal. If your body is healing, it's not growing. So you aren't getting better each day, you are just trying to keep up. If you go to limit and stop you aren't straining or hurting... your body keeps working on the regular healing, without dealing with the extra strain and then each day it's a little stronger, a little more limber. It all just grows... Our bodies, as they adjust to getting hormones back, to getting the metabolism up again, to getting muscles and organs working again, it's a LOT of work to do... and if you push to hard... it can't do it all.... give it a chance to get better....

awwww... shut up Topper!!!!!

Topper ()

On Sun, 05 Feb 2006 09:17:06 -0000 "rjane1955" writes:

Man this can get me sobbing. Just before my goiter was found and the thyroiditis, I had just started telling my 2 docs that I felt like I had brain damage and that I wanted my brain back. It has made accomplishing things in my day, so so so hard. And now, since surgery, my brain is worse. I realize I've got a trunkload of psyche stuff from the cancer word, to move through and that's in the brain, competing for my attention. Before my goiter was found, doing a household task had got to where it felt like doing a calculus test and regular math is enough of a challenge to me. I knew there was a time I could do housework without thnking about what I was doing much. I want a brain back to where I can be functional. Where I don't have to extend 150% brain power to get one thing done, back to where I can use 20% to get things done. Will it happen ? How long does it take? My thyroid was removed cuz of cancer and I am on 200 my levothyroxine since Dec 9. My tsh as of Dec 7 was 163 (good reason to not have follow up by the surgeon.) I have a 1.5 cm growth on my left adrenal. Tests have shown the epenephrines are high. We're doing more test to rule out high cuz of stress. What do whacked out adrenals do to brain power ? The thought of not getting my brain back puts me into sobs. It means there's really not much I can accomplish in a day. Energy is good, but the brain puts together the ability to do a task, to figure out how it needs to be done and what with and what first, second, third. I feel overwhelmed at the simplest task. Since I've only done 8 weeks on the med and I think it will be increased, the only thing I really can do is wait till my brain comes back and in the meantime do just what I can. But that gets me crying cuz I don't want it to be that way for the rest of my life -- doing what I can do. I want a brain where I can get back to juggling all the balls in a day that I used to be able to do. What gets me is feeling overwhelmed at things I consider doing. The last 3 yrs when brain wasn't working well, I pushed myself 150% and I wont do that anymore. I will work up to what I'm capable of, but not push myself to have to do more.So those who've done hypo and hyper, do you get your brain back. Energy is back for me, brain to do stuff, isn't here.sad jane in us

February 5, 2006