Inclusion

[Guest guest]

Ok I am so going to rock the boat here but of course I am going to share what I

have learned in my long life. You know I believe in Inclusion. Totally,

absolutely, and strongly. You know that because that is exactly what we did

with Patty. But we did that with her because that was right for her. It

probably worked because when we did it the term wasn't even invented yet. We

had the best teachers the state had to offer from the beginning to the end. It

worked for Patty. It defiantly was not great from grade 6 on till graduation

but it was much better than any of the alternatives there was to offer.

I do have to say that though it was right for Patty and is right for many

children I do not believe Inclusion is appropriate for every child. I believe

in the full continuum of services from inclusion to an institutional setting (as

long as that is always investigated). There are too many variables to look at

when considering placement for children, including the severity of the

disability. As an advocate I have helped push for full inclusion for various

children with various disabilities and I have helped people understand a child

desperately needed out placement to be able to receive " the most appropriate,

least restrictive " educational setting. No matter the placement though I also

believe no one should be excluded from their community and/or society. It's not

the what or the where but it is the why,who and the how that is important for

all children being disabled or not. Each person is an individual. There is no

more cookie cutter type of education for anyone. We all have learned better!

There is also much to say about a persons peer group. Patty was the most

accepted child there was in our community when she was a baby to about the end

of elementary/middle school age. And by that I mean EVERY child! I could not

go to the grocery store without someone talking to her, knowing her.... And

then she grew up. Patty became the kid in the class with disabilities. We

fought that. The disability became her identification. That wasn't right but

that is human. Patty became the " brave " one. Patty became that kid who adults

thought was extraordinary because she " overcame " her disabilities continually,

and the one who her peers helped, wrote notes for, had her along to " look

good. " ... She didn't grow to become just one of the gang who was funny, liked

rock and roll, was mischievous... She became a person with disabilities. And

boy oh boy did she fight that like the dickens. All she wanted to be was Patty.

All she wanted to be was accepted for being her. And she had that right too.

So we faught for her. But that is one of the stresses I could not make go away

no matter how hard I tried. With all of that Patty became lonely. She went from

being the model to being the token. That hurt her heart the most.

And then you know the story of Patty at age 15 or 16 going to the Perkins

Outreach Summer training program. She went for three weeks. That's it. The

best thing about it wasn't only what she learned but the fact that there were

other kids her age who also had similar disabilities. Yet even there she was

" unique " in that she was the only one with CHARGE. The phenomenal thing about

the whole program was that Patty didn't have to become anything to fit. She

just did. With that she let go and was just Patty. You know with that she even

met a friend who was a boy who went to her Junior prom with her. If she hadn't

she never would have had that wonderful experience. What Patty was able to

learn and do there was more than what the school did or could have done for her

for 4 years. She also did the outreach job training program the next summer for

five weeks. Once again it was more than she had received ever in her

Inclusional setting in her home school. She let go and just was.

Now that she is an adult she pushes for adult inclusion. That is her right as a

citizen. So you bet I push for her harder. But it is also her ability. Patty

graduated, reads, writes, cares for herself (and us) and is a hardworking woman.

Yet society does not accept or protect her. It's the hardest fact we have

learned in all this. In school it is a small and guided community. Society is

not. Sure it would be nice if all people were equal, if all people were kind,

if all people were accepted. But that's just not the truth or reality.

Sure we have to break down those walls and sure we have to fight for the rights

of everyone. But we must continually know that what is right for one might not

be right for another. One of the saddest and most heartbreaking things I see

now is people who have disabilities sitting in their homes with no connection

with their peer groups, with little opportunities, and with little positive

healthy lives.

My sister in law has a sister with severe disabilities. This woman is my age

and now lives in her parents house. Her big thing to look forward to is grocery

shopping. She had a different living experience years ago but that stopped with

budget cuts. She lost her friends because there are no appropriate day programs

for her. There are no appropriate community programs for her. They want her in

her " community " but she has none now. Her " community " was her job program and

her bowling, and her playing cards or buildings puzzles with people like her-

with similar disabilities. She had friends. Now she goes to the grocery store

and no one connects with her. Now she goes to a restaurant and no one sits near

her. Now she is lonely.

I do not think that's right. And by the way it's all funding. And it's all

forcing someone into a situation that isn't appropriate for that individual.

Ok, so I have gone on too long and I am sure I have stirred up something here.

It is just that our vision of what is right for all people and the reality of

the humanness of life are different. Maybe one day in this world we will all be

vauled as equal. Maybe one day there will be inclusion that is the true

definition of inclusion. Maybe one day no one will care about anything but the

human soul and heart. Maybe one day we will all see no one is better or worse

than the other. May be one day we may see that we are less than those who have

disabilities. But that one day is a life time away. We must break down

barriers, remove limitations,.... but we also must protect the human spirit and

soul. Sometimes that is inclusion. But sometimes it's not. There is such a

hard invisible line in this life.

I will always and forever fight for inclusion. But I will always and forever

fight for appropriate....

Bonnie, mom to a 23, Patty CHARGE 21, and wife to

Re: Amelie school issues!!

i think reading about ,s and everyones school experience,

has made me realise that i won know whats rigt or wrong for Amelies

needs, and i guess your right that she will guide me, interesting that

some have chosen local smaller special needs over big (cheadle school

for the deaf) which is vast in comparison. I think it may be a good

idea to start with the smaller special needs scholl part time, and see

if its meeting her needs and make sure shes happy going and take it

slowly from there.

thanks everyone for the sound advice,

Michele i love your post on classroom and world representation, and i

would consult you before making any decisions...it makes sense to me!

lol les x

lesley x amelie x

> Ellen-

> Moving your group around sounds really crazy. In my heart, I believe in

> inclusion. I believe Aubrie can and should be taught right alongside her

> peers because that is the best way to prepare her for adulthood alongside

> her peers. In my perfect world, each classroom would have a natural mix of

> typical kids and kids with all kinds of disabilities with a regular ed

> teacher, a special ed teacher, and however many other adults are needed to

> meet the needs of those particular kids. And if class sizes needed to be

> smaller to make it work, then that would benefit *all* of the kids.

>

> But, of course, the world is not perfect. I still need to make my website

> " www.askchele.com " so the world can consult me before making any big

> decisions. As my husband has so clearly pointed out -- I do have all the

> answers! LOL

>

> Everyone fits in the world. So why can't we fit in a classroom? The

> classrooms must not be a good representation of the world!

>

> Michele W

> mom to Aubrie 8 yrs CHARGE, 14 yrs and wife to DJ

>

>

>

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