Re: Venting

January 12, 2005

Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

Sorry for rambling, again....

On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

and I started the injections last night, actually late

last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

are going to try this month with just the meds and

monitoring.

Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

baby dust.

Thanks,

UU, ttc 3 years

January 12, 2005

Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

Sorry for rambling, again....

On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

and I started the injections last night, actually late

last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

are going to try this month with just the meds and

monitoring.

Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

baby dust.

Thanks,

UU, ttc 3 years

January 12, 2005

Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

Sorry for rambling, again....

On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

and I started the injections last night, actually late

last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

are going to try this month with just the meds and

monitoring.

Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

baby dust.

Thanks,

UU, ttc 3 years

January 12, 2005

Sorry I should of read this before I responded. Anyways take care of

yourself.

> Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

> now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

> to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

> is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

> tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

> easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

> can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

> and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

> that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

> is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

> and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

> have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

> yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

> dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

> arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

> dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

> they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

> probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

> reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

> do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

> angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

> of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

> baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

> hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

> that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

>

> Sorry for rambling, again....

>

> On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

> and I started the injections last night, actually late

> last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

> go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

> injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

> little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

> the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

> novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

> unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

> cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

> cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

> are going to try this month with just the meds and

> monitoring.

>

> Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

> are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

> baby dust.

>

> Thanks,

>

> UU, ttc 3 years

January 12, 2005

Sorry I should of read this before I responded. Anyways take care of

yourself.

> Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

> now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

> to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

> is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

> tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

> easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

> can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

> and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

> that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

> is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

> and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

> have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

> yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

> dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

> arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

> dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

> they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

> probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

> reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

> do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

> angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

> of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

> baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

> hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

> that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

>

> Sorry for rambling, again....

>

> On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

> and I started the injections last night, actually late

> last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

> go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

> injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

> little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

> the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

> novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

> unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

> cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

> cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

> are going to try this month with just the meds and

> monitoring.

>

> Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

> are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

> baby dust.

>

> Thanks,

>

> UU, ttc 3 years

January 12, 2005

Sorry I should of read this before I responded. Anyways take care of

yourself.

> Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

> now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

> to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

> is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

> tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

> easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

> can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

> and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

> that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

> is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

> and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

> have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

> yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

> dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

> arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

> dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

> they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

> probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

> reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

> do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

> angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

> of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

> baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

> hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

> that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

>

> Sorry for rambling, again....

>

> On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

> and I started the injections last night, actually late

> last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

> go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

> injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

> little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

> the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

> novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

> unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

> cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

> cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

> are going to try this month with just the meds and

> monitoring.

>

> Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

> are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

> baby dust.

>

> Thanks,

>

> UU, ttc 3 years

January 14, 2005

--

Your feelings are perfectly normal and understandable-----how I hope that

your turn is just around the corner. Good luck with the injections

(ouch!)---take care---

Jen, 36

SU with a " dip "

resected 11-15-04

In a message dated 1/12/2005 1:13:29 PM Eastern Standard Time,

dstebs@... writes:

Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

> now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

> to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

> is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

> tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

> easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

> can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

> and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

> that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

> is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

> and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

> have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

> yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

> dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

> arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

> dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

> they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

> probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

> reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

> do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

> angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

> of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

> baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

> hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

> that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

>

> Sorry for rambling, again....

>

> On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

> and I started the injections last night, actually late

> last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

> go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

> injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

> little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

> the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

> novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

> unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

> cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

> cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

> are going to try this month with just the meds and

> monitoring.

>

> Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

> are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

> baby dust.

>

> Thanks,

>

> UU, ttc 3 years

January 14, 2005

--

Your feelings are perfectly normal and understandable-----how I hope that

your turn is just around the corner. Good luck with the injections

(ouch!)---take care---

Jen, 36

SU with a " dip "

resected 11-15-04

In a message dated 1/12/2005 1:13:29 PM Eastern Standard Time,

dstebs@... writes:

Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

> now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

> to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

> is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

> tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

> easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

> can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

> and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

> that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

> is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

> and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

> have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

> yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

> dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

> arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

> dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

> they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

> probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

> reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

> do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

> angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

> of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

> baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

> hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

> that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

>

> Sorry for rambling, again....

>

> On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

> and I started the injections last night, actually late

> last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

> go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

> injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

> little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

> the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

> novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

> unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

> cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

> cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

> are going to try this month with just the meds and

> monitoring.

>

> Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

> are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

> baby dust.

>

> Thanks,

>

> UU, ttc 3 years

January 15, 2005

Thanks Jen,

I am feeling a little better now. The injections have taken my mind off some of

the things. The injections are not that bad, once I got over the mental part of

it. I am not having any of the side effects I had with the Clomid, or atleast

crazy pyscho woman has not visited yet. I have even been able to give them to

myself a couple times. I took some pointers from the ladies here about icing,

massaging, etc and they really do work. I am taking Follistim AQ, switch on day

3 from gonal-f. The Follistim AQ comes in a pen and is more like an insulin

shot. I was a little freaked out when with my prescription was another for

Noveral and a bunch of really big needles . I wasn't sure what it was or what

it was for. Apparently, it will make me release the egg if I do not do it on my

own. Unfortunately those are intramuscular shots, so I am really praying I

ovulate on my own. lol. I don't think all the ice in the world is going to

make that one not hurt. On the brighter side, I am feeling more optimistic now

than I have in years. Hopefully it is our turn very soon.

Thanks,

UU

ttc 3 years

From: jread321@...

To: MullerianAnomalies

Sent: Friday, January 14, 2005 9:55 PM

Subject: Re: Re: Venting

--

Your feelings are perfectly normal and understandable-----how I hope that

your turn is just around the corner. Good luck with the injections

(ouch!)---take care---

Jen, 36

SU with a " dip "

resected 11-15-04

In a message dated 1/12/2005 1:13:29 PM Eastern Standard Time,

dstebs@... writes:

Thank You Ladies! I am feeling extremely selfish right

> now. Sorry but I am ready for it to be my turn. I talked

> to my friend several times since she told me Monday, she

> is very concerned I am going to be upset with her. I

> tried to explain in the best way possible, which is not

> easy, that I am not upset with her for being pregnant. I

> can not be upset with her for something she is able to do

> and I can not. But I also can not help the other feelings

> that I am feeling, mainly jealousy. I am jealous that it

> is so easy for so many people. I am jealous that woman

> and children have babies everyday they did not plan to

> have nor want, and what I want more than anything I have

> yet to have. I am jealous because of the one thing I have

> dreamt of the last few years is holding my baby in my

> arms, and I continue to have the recurring dream(literal

> dream, when sleeping dream. lol.) of having a baby and

> they will never let me hold her. Second feeling I can

> probably add to that is pity, and for all the same above

> reasons. I think I am starting to pity myself, because I

> do not know how else to deal with it. I could never be

> angry with my friend, I just asked her not to let me out

> of this. It may be the closest thing I have to having a

> baby of my own. As much as it may hurt at times, it would

> hurt me more for her to not share all the exciting things

> that are happening with her and her pregnancy.

>

> Sorry for rambling, again....

>

> On a brighter note, I got my insurance stuff worked out

> and I started the injections last night, actually late

> last night. Had many people working overtime to get it to

> go through. They switched them to the subcutaneous

> injections, which I am relieved about. I am still a

> little shocked at how much it hurts. I did not realize

> the medication would be that thick. That and DH being a

> novice at it may not have helped. I have been approved for

> unlimited (well, as unlimited as you can get) meds and 3

> cycles of IUI. If the 3 cycles of IUI fail, I can have 3

> cycles of IVF this year. Starts over again next year. We

> are going to try this month with just the meds and

> monitoring.

>

> Thank you to everyone that replied. It helps knowing we

> are not alone out there. Best of luck to all and much

> baby dust.

>

> Thanks,

>

> UU, ttc 3 years

January 15, 2005