Re: I need to vent

[Guest guest]

I know this isn't quite the same, but when my 4 yr old wants food he can't have,

I ask him if he likes not having his tummy hurt all the time and having to go to

the bathroom all the time, etc. and that really seems to help. I wonder if your

son will think about how yucky he feels now and realize how much better he felt

beforehand.

I know teenagers find it difficult to adhere to the diet, but many do it

voluntarily because they feel so much better when they do. Maybe when he's

calmed down and is rational, you can ask him if he notices the difference. I

imagine he will have to 'buy in' to the idea or he won't stick to it.

I'm so sorry for your frustration.

Robbie

I need to vent

Hi everyone, I have 3 kids on this diet. They are all adopted and are 14,

7, 5 and today I found out that my 14 year old has had 6 granola bars and 12

candy canes in the last 8 days. I don't even have this stuff in the house. He

had them hidden in his room. I am so mad at him. He is eating scd for

behavior but also his bowel movements were terrible before. The section on

scizaphrenia in Elaines book is him to a t. We have been on the diet since May.

He has had a few infractions since then but this one is really big. I just

want to make him stay in his room (after I have searched it) for a long long

time so I don't have to deal with this. I have put so much effort into all of

this food thing and I feel so defeated. I don't know if I should make him stay

next to me for months (like a prison sentence for me) so that I make sure he

doesn't do it again. He just got over a major meltdown where he was going to

run away and of course I'm trying to stop him because he would

just go and buy more junk and who knows where he would end up, and he is

bigger then me . He can be so wonderful when he is eating right. In a coherent

moment he said I was just to tempted. I don't expect anybody to have any

answers for me but I know someone out there knows what I'm feeling like. Thanks

for listening. Pearl

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

I know this isn't quite the same, but when my 4 yr old wants food he can't have,

I ask him if he likes not having his tummy hurt all the time and having to go to

the bathroom all the time, etc. and that really seems to help. I wonder if your

son will think about how yucky he feels now and realize how much better he felt

beforehand.

I know teenagers find it difficult to adhere to the diet, but many do it

voluntarily because they feel so much better when they do. Maybe when he's

calmed down and is rational, you can ask him if he notices the difference. I

imagine he will have to 'buy in' to the idea or he won't stick to it.

I'm so sorry for your frustration.

Robbie

I need to vent

Hi everyone, I have 3 kids on this diet. They are all adopted and are 14,

7, 5 and today I found out that my 14 year old has had 6 granola bars and 12

candy canes in the last 8 days. I don't even have this stuff in the house. He

had them hidden in his room. I am so mad at him. He is eating scd for

behavior but also his bowel movements were terrible before. The section on

scizaphrenia in Elaines book is him to a t. We have been on the diet since May.

He has had a few infractions since then but this one is really big. I just

want to make him stay in his room (after I have searched it) for a long long

time so I don't have to deal with this. I have put so much effort into all of

this food thing and I feel so defeated. I don't know if I should make him stay

next to me for months (like a prison sentence for me) so that I make sure he

doesn't do it again. He just got over a major meltdown where he was going to

run away and of course I'm trying to stop him because he would

just go and buy more junk and who knows where he would end up, and he is

bigger then me . He can be so wonderful when he is eating right. In a coherent

moment he said I was just to tempted. I don't expect anybody to have any

answers for me but I know someone out there knows what I'm feeling like. Thanks

for listening. Pearl

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

I know this isn't quite the same, but when my 4 yr old wants food he can't have,

I ask him if he likes not having his tummy hurt all the time and having to go to

the bathroom all the time, etc. and that really seems to help. I wonder if your

son will think about how yucky he feels now and realize how much better he felt

beforehand.

I know teenagers find it difficult to adhere to the diet, but many do it

voluntarily because they feel so much better when they do. Maybe when he's

calmed down and is rational, you can ask him if he notices the difference. I

imagine he will have to 'buy in' to the idea or he won't stick to it.

I'm so sorry for your frustration.

Robbie

I need to vent

Hi everyone, I have 3 kids on this diet. They are all adopted and are 14,

7, 5 and today I found out that my 14 year old has had 6 granola bars and 12

candy canes in the last 8 days. I don't even have this stuff in the house. He

had them hidden in his room. I am so mad at him. He is eating scd for

behavior but also his bowel movements were terrible before. The section on

scizaphrenia in Elaines book is him to a t. We have been on the diet since May.

He has had a few infractions since then but this one is really big. I just

want to make him stay in his room (after I have searched it) for a long long

time so I don't have to deal with this. I have put so much effort into all of

this food thing and I feel so defeated. I don't know if I should make him stay

next to me for months (like a prison sentence for me) so that I make sure he

doesn't do it again. He just got over a major meltdown where he was going to

run away and of course I'm trying to stop him because he would

just go and buy more junk and who knows where he would end up, and he is

bigger then me . He can be so wonderful when he is eating right. In a coherent

moment he said I was just to tempted. I don't expect anybody to have any

answers for me but I know someone out there knows what I'm feeling like. Thanks

for listening. Pearl

__________________________________________________

[Guest guest]

Wow, I am so sorry this has happened to you. I can only imagine how

you must feel. How long have you been on the diet, or has your son?

Has it been a long time? Well, you may have to do some " tough love "

on him. These are just thoughts for you, as I am brainstorming ideas.

The tough love may be necessary for him. Since he is still not old

enough to drive, grounding him from the car won't work, but what

about taking away privileges that he really enjoys. I know it's

hard, but he is still under your supervision, it is your house and

you are the parent in charge. Do you have the support of your

husband?

Is your son able to understand that unless he does the diet (or some

other intervention you deem necessary), he is headed for a life of

chronic pain, illness, mental problems, endless trips to an MD,

medications, hospital stays, and ultimately no life at all. He will

never be able to enjoy life, go on dates, etc. I would plainly tell

him where he is headed and how much you love him, and that you are

trying to help him. I was once where he is, endless turmoil as a

teen leading to Crohn's at 21, with IBS etc. I was fine on the outer

shell, but inside crumbling apart, and much was caused by all these

SCD issues we discuss here. I would tell him the issues will not get

better or go away, they will only worsen, sadly, apart from Divine

intervention of the instantaneous kind.

Another idea, what about incentive for staying on the diet? What

does he like or enjoy? Would giving him more allowance or something

work for him?

This may mean taking him out of school, if he is in school right

now. Would homeschooling be a possibility for you? You know, it

sounds overwhelming, but more sacrifices may be required which will

be hard but definitely worth it in the long run.

It is so hard to get people, especially teenagers, to see the long-

term, big picture impact of what they are doing to their bodies.

Somehow, the big picture issues must be faced and understood, the

eternal issues of his future.

Most importantly, I would encourage you to seek God's wisdom and

counsel, comfort and direction in the Scriptures and through prayer.

We have the answer for every need in God's Word. He will help you

and can even change your son's heart and mind. My prayers are with

you and your son tonight. The Lord loves your son and is deeply

concerned about his life, as you are. Seek His wisdom and He WILL

guide you... (Proverbs 3: 4-5)

(P.S. On an interesting note, I noticed your son said he was just

too tempted. I tend to believe him, as the pull for the old starches

and sugars is SOOO strong, and food is an actual temptation of one of

the strongest kinds! He is admitting the truth on that, not just an

excuse...)

Tina

SCD almost 9 months with two little boys doing well...

> Hi everyone, I have 3 kids on this diet. They are all adopted

and are 14, 7, 5 and today I found out that my 14 year old has had 6

granola bars and 12 candy canes in the last 8 days. I don't even have

this stuff in the house. He had them hidden in his room. I am so

mad at him. He is eating scd for behavior but also his bowel

movements were terrible before. The section on scizaphrenia in

Elaines book is him to a t. We have been on the diet since May. He

has had a few infractions since then but this one is really big. I

just want to make him stay in his room (after I have searched it) for

a long long time so I don't have to deal with this. I have put so

much effort into all of this food thing and I feel so defeated. I

don't know if I should make him stay next to me for months (like a

prison sentence for me) so that I make sure he doesn't do it again.

He just got over a major meltdown where he was going to run away and

of course I'm trying to stop him because he would

> just go and buy more junk and who knows where he would end up, and

he is bigger then me . He can be so wonderful when he is eating

right. In a coherent moment he said I was just to tempted. I don't

expect anybody to have any answers for me but I know someone out

there knows what I'm feeling like. Thanks for listening. Pearl

>

> __________________________________________________

>

[Guest guest]

I know how you feel... I had both my kids on teh diet - 7yo ASD son

doing well and cooperating, 9yo n/t daughter not really showing

much progress. Then I discovered that she had been eating parts of

other kids' lunches every day for 4 months! I was soooo

angry/frustrated/felt like all that work I did was a waste!

I do have a friend who has made some progress with their 12yo by

pointing out (exaggeratedly sometimes) times when child cheated and

expereinced bad behavior/bad BM/GI distress/feeling yucky, or

whatever. Doesn/t work with mine because she doesn't always have

directly related problems close im time.

But boy, I can empathize.

-- Sue, mom to A and K

[Guest guest]

Oh, Pearl, we have days like that too! They certainly are no fun, I

know. I tell my kids (ages 16, 10, 8 & 7 on SCD)they are 100% in charge

of what they eat - or don't. They won't get in trouble (with me)if they

eat illegals. I want them to tell me, so I don't go crazy trying to

figure out what I gave them that was not good. BUT - they are

responsible for their behavior (and when they eat illegals - WHOO BOY!)

So, they have consequences (punishment) for wretched behavior, and when

they eat illegals, they act up - so mostly, they are compliant with the

diet.

Honestly, school is a hard place to be if you are on SCD - between the

birthday treats, star of the week treats, pizza with the principal for

good behavior, popcorn and movie days, junk food machines in all the

middle and high schools, it is TOUGH. Maybe your son needs to hear that

you recognize that - and hear that you know he can do tough things.

(That's our motto: Yes, that's hard, but you can do hard things!)

Remember, this is a marathon, not a sprint. Some days are 2 steps

forward, 14 steps back. But keep chuggin' away, you're doing the right

thing.

Tell your son there is a cute 16 year old girl in Minnesota who will be

looking for a husband in the future. Gluten-eaters need not apply, and

SCD would look REALLY good on his application!:-)

Hang in there - I hope today will be better!

SCD 6 mos

[Guest guest]

Your son mentioned that he craved the carbs. As someone who struggles with

this, I can tell you it's a terrible problem.

What might help most is to help him realize that if he eats sugars, he'll

crave them more. It's as bad as an addiction to say, nicotine.

The fact that he said that was the reason, not that he was trying to defy

you, is a big clue. I would work with him to find sweets he can eat " safely "

when he craves carbs.

And I would try to help him understand that athletes for instance have

special diets. Perhaps there are dreams he has that you can help tie to this

for him.